Hihii its me aysell , its been a while . I have risen from the trenches of jury and finals weeks . i havet slept or properly ate these last few days due to how intense it was . I'm an architecture student so my sanity goes out the roof. All I could think about was to have patience until I can be free enough to read through your fics because they are so comforting to me .
As you have asked , I have finally returned with new varka brainworms , this time it's more angsty , prolly because my mental health was all over the place the last 2 weeks or so .
The idea started out of an idea about love that never came to a conclusion . What if the reader is a captain in the knights of Favonius , a trusted knight who bears the title of frostlamp knight . an icy protector of mondstat . Despite her vision and gaze as cold as the tallest mountains of snezhnaya , her eyes and heart are full of warmth. Varka and her are inseparable , a team so perfect they never need to communicate , they know before they speak. Reader is part of the knights intelligence network , so she is usually part of secret missions . As Varkas most trusted knight , the reader carries out dangerous duties in the shadows . I have not thought that deep into details yet , but when I do ,I shall send them in !!
The concept is that the reader finds out devastating truths regarding the divine (while investigating the spiral abyss ) and celestia and the abyss( the heavenly principals and their destruction) , as she sees the foreshadowing war of such brutality , she breaks down . she cannot fathom a time so soon to come where her home is in ruins , her people dead , her friends perished and her love covered in so much blood its unclear if its his or someone elses. A truth so earth shattering , its strips away all her warmth into intention and determination . to cause blasphemy so big . but she knows she cannot do anything if she remains with the knights. So i think she will either fake her death or dissapear during a high stakes mission . varka is probably on expedition during this time . so imagine the devastation, the love of his life gone , no trace, nothing as if she does not exist. Everyone in the knights is.devastated. She was an older sister to jean and barbara , a mentor to diluc and kaeya, an almost mother figure to razor and amber , a confidant to rosaria . its ripped the reader 's heart out when she had to leave but she needed to look at the bigger picture , someone needed to go forward . for mondstat as always .
wHAt if the reader ends up in sneznaya , and joins project stuza , what if joins to become a harbinger , resources granted by the tsaritsa would prove to be useful , after all their goals align. What if varka goes insane at the thought of her , where she is she safe , she always comes back , he searches for her everywhere as he travels to nod krai. It's as if she never existed . let me know your thoughts and idea regarding this , i love your ideas
Hi again Aysell! :) Sorry for the wait. First of all, I’m happy to hear that you’re finished with your finals. While my 3D capabilities are not exactly great, I’ve always been fascinated by architecture. :) It sounds incredibly intense though, so I hope you’re finally getting some rest, proper food, and sleep again.
And now. I was so happy to receive more Varka brainworms from you!
Truth is, I’ve been missing Varka a lot again lately. And while I’m currently in a certain Phainon mood, Varka is always somewhere on my mind and in my heart too. He gives me a different kind of comfort and brainrot. :)
So it makes me very happy that you find comfort in my fics for him. Comments like this and the thoughts people send me really motivate me to continue writing for him… well, apart from my own brainrot that tends to make me do it anyway. :D
Ohhh and the angle for your idea is so good.
I really love what you have in mind for Reader here because I’ve often thought about readers who have a more strategic role within Mondstadt. Not cold exactly, but capable of thinking ahead. Someone who is forced to look at the bigger picture.
That fits Varka too. People often focus on his warmth and charisma (understandably so), but canon repeatedly shows that he thinks ahead, prepares for possibilities, builds alliances, and understands the value of information. He’s a leader, yes, but also a planner.
So I can absolutely see him being drawn to someone who understands that side of responsibility. And I love the contrast you created.
Reader who appears cold but is actually incredibly warm. Someone willing to do difficult things because she cares.
Because Varka is very similar in that regard. He is pragmatic. He is capable of making difficult decisions. But underneath all of that there is so much kindness.
I also love the dynamic you described between them.
The trust. The equality. The idea that they know each other so well that words become almost unnecessary. That sort of partnership always speaks to me.
And ohhh, I absolutely love the idea that Reader discovers something while investigating the Abyss.
Because first of all it mirrors Varka in an interesting way. One of the things that fascinated me about his role in canon is that after learning about the potential future shown through the scryglass, he couldn’t simply sit still. He chose to investigate further. He chose action.
So I really like the parallel of Reader finding something equally devastating and reacting to it differently. And it creates so much room for character development.
But I think the part that hurts me the most here is that Reader isn’t leaving because she stops loving Mondstadt.
She’s leaving because she loves it too much. Because from her perspective she has seen something so terrifying, so inevitable, that she becomes willing to sacrifice everything else for even the smallest chance of changing the outcome.
Her home. Her friends. Her position within the Knights. And eventually Varka too.
Which is heartbreaking because those are exactly the things she is trying to protect.
And I think that’s where the tragedy really lives. Because Varka would understand that. Not immediately, of course. At first he would be devastated. Angry. Confused. Searching for answers.
But once he realizes she left because she believed this was the only path forward? I think part of him would hate that she felt she had to carry that burden alone. Because that’s such a Varka thing too.
And that’s why I think they mirror each other so well in your idea.
And ohhhh. The Snezhnaya angle. The Harbinger angle. The absolute desperation on Varka’s side.
I love it.
Side note: During one of my Varka angst phases a couple months ago I actually started writing something vaguely similar. Not exactly this scenario, but Reader was an ex-Fatui agent and Varka found them in Nod-Krai.
It was much more pre-relationship though. Very slow burn. A lot of distrust. A lot of trauma. Almost enemies-to-lovers in spirit. Or perhaps enemies to reluctant allies to something more.
I never posted it because I wasn’t sure where I wanted to take it, so it still lives in my drafts somewhere. :D
But because of that I absolutely understand why your idea fascinates me so much. Because there is something so compelling about people ending up on opposite sides while still wanting fundamentally similar things.
And that is what I keep coming back to here. Because technically Reader and Varka still want the same thing. To protect Mondstadt. To stop the Abyss. To save people.
They’ve simply chosen different paths. And that makes everything so much more painful.
Something else I’m curious about: How much of herself does Reader actually keep after becoming a Harbinger? Because that feels like such an important question.
You describe her as someone warm-hearted despite the icy exterior. Someone who acts from love.
So does she manage to hold onto that warmth all those years later? Or does Varka eventually find her again and realize she has changed in ways that frighten him?
And if she has changed, is there still enough left of the person he loved for them to find each other again? Because that possibility absolutely destroys me.
And you mentioned that this is a love story that never came to a conclusion. So now I’m curious. Would they meet again? Would they become enemies? Would they become reluctant allies? Would this happen before the current Nod-Krai storyline or alongside it?
Because I can imagine Varka feeling betrayed at first. Not because she left but because she didn’t trust him enough to share the burden.
And yet at the same time, he would probably understand exactly why she did it. Which feels very painful and very Varka.
Anyway, I absolutely love this concept.
Please continue sending me your Varka brainworms because they always make me think. :)
