#azalin fails

[demiplanardemagogue]

After a period of separation, Azalin Rex recently reached out to his former flying mount and ally, the shadow dragoness Ebb, strongly suggesting a return to his castle. A Kargat representative told us that Ebb simply flew the coop in frustration during Azalin's "extended vacation". Ebb however maintains she submitted her proper two week notice to then temp custodian of Castle Avernus, Galf Kloggin. Kloggin could not be reached for comment.

In any case, Ebb rebuked Azalin's offer. Citing her change of status on her 757 BC birthday, the shadow dragon stated, "I'm getting too Old for this shit! I'm not gonna be your aerial chauffeur anymore. If you wanna go somewhere from now on, stand on your own two feet!"

Ebb further explained, "I'm a family dragon now, with kids and a hubby. We've got a happy family life making others unhappy! And besides, despite his name, Gloom is less depressing than your brooding bony butt. My return to your side is no longer a Dread Possibility!"

Ebb currently maintains an active business of raiding and pillaging from her nest in Mount Nyld, where she lives with her hatchlings and cave-husband, Gloom.

[demiplanardemagogue]

Despite Vlad Drakov's efforts to rebrand Falkovnia, it appears the nation is floundering. As recently reported, Falkovnia's citizens are fleeing the domain like rats from a sinking ship- except it's perhaps the rats that are staying behind in charge. Drakov has in recent days attempted numerous strategies to regain lost tax revenues. However, success in keeping to keep his borders closed for Drakov seems as slippery as Soth's resolve. This is because efforts rarely address the core problem- that his management is running it into the ground. Drakov's nightly impalings to lively dinner music do little to earn subject loyalty, for example. Apparently, offering Bloody Red Verified User checkmarks to speedup time through military checkpoints hardly seems to make up for the daily threat of having a spear through your gut.

Still, Drakov considers his land's lack of popularity to be a mere branding problem- hence renaming it "Super Happy Fun Land." (His initial idea of a name was inexplicably "Y"- perhaps as in "Y are you leaving?"- though his Ministry of Marketing at least managed to convince him only the greatest fools would rename a domain to a single letter. Whatever the case, it seems to have little effect in helping Falkovnia reestablish itself. And so once again, Falkovnia invaded the market but was repulsed- or perhaps it was repulsive.

Super Happy Fun Land's failures occur in the context of newly rising competition- though in some cases the competition seems to be doing little better. The Rex has established a nearby community on the border called "Dreads" to lure in Falkovnian defectors- though for various reasons it seems to be doing only slightly better. Darkon Zuckerberg seems to be seeking more souls to sacrifice for some farfetched plan or another- like blowing up the demiplane in another escape attempt or popularizing tire-sized VR goggles. Meanwhile, a Falkovnian defector is attempting to setup a BlueDie on Tepestani shores. Only time will tell if it will survive or go the way of Super Happy Fun Land's now extinct blue bird.