It's been a while since he'd looked looked through her files, afterall, he might as well have every word and bit of code memorized by now. But something about today was different. An anniversary? A memory? Either way, here he was again. A lost text, unsent: I messed up. I messed up big time, and I know it's not enough, but I'm sorry... I'd like to think I taught you better; be safe out there. If things go the way I expect...well...I love you and take care of yourself.
LOCAL MAN MOURNS PUNK ROCKER
clara lille still lives on in dedsec’s toolkits, her memory etched into PCBs and embodied forever in the comments of scripts that sit at the heart of their ctOS exploits. pieces of her work have been pillages, re-written, borrowed, referenced, and taken for scraps until badboy17 has dissipated through their systems entirely, as ubiquitous in death as she was in life. there’s something oddly right about it, he thinks; james derives at least some small comfort from knowing that, at least behind her handle, clara lives on.
the rest of her files— the personal ones— live on in triple-redundant platters kept under lock and key. james insists it’s a matter of pragmatism, what with clara being the trapdoor spider of dedsec chicago, and like evidence at a crime scene each and every one of her personal, digital belongings had been carefully catalogued and taken by james for… analysis? protection? mementos? at the time he told himself it was because he didn’t know what he might need of her. would never know when her info might come in handy. and tonight is one of those nights: flipping through file systems looking for this and that, images of computers, old messages on backups of phones.
he’s looking for something on the club, of course. his fingers pluck through another subdirectory, scanning line after line of text, ignoring the pit that grows in his stomach as the dates begin to approach that date.
his fingers stop. his breathing stops. hell, he thinks his heart stops. between clipped gallows humour shot back and forth— the last messages he’ll ever send her— is a paragraph that makes his stomach twist into knots.
he hangs there for a moment, fingers hovering, and delicately taps something in return.
[ NOVEMBER 8, 2013, 2:01:15 AM (DRAFT) ] well…I love you and take care of yourself.
[ MAY 12, 2019, 4:44:32 AM ] I love you, too.
NUMBER NO LONGER IN SERVICE.