Happy Valentine’s Day @brkln-99!!! I’m so sorry I haven’t been as active sending you messages as I could have... but I hope you’ll like this lil fic :3
So yeah, surprise... I’m your B99 Valentines :D It’s been a pleasure talking with you a bit and getting to know you these past weeks! It’s the 14th on both our countries now so I can post it. I know it’s like the end of the day for you already but I hope you had an amazing day today, filled with all kinds of love!
Also huge shoutout to @three-drink-amy for proofreading this story as well as @okayokaycoolcoolcool and everyone else who offered their help with this – it was really appreciated. And ofc thank you again @flowersgrowback for yet another amazing event organized for the fandom!
Just a heads up, this is inspired by episode 4x10 of Schitt’s Creek (I’d totally recommend this show if you don’t know it yet, it’s amazing) and is set in season 2, although here timeline-wise even if it’s only February it’s been a few months since Jake and Sophia broke up already.
Having to go undercover at some weird single people matchmaking event while working on a case with Amy isn’t exactly how Jake imagined spending his Valentine’s Day. Yet here he is, walking around a room packed with people in desperate search of the perfect fit for their lock or their key. That’s the activity they’ve been signed up for, apparently – while the men of the group got a lock attached to their waistband, the women were given the keys at random and both parties had to mingle and try out said key or lock on everybody until they found the one that belonged with their part of the pair.
It’s not like he had plans anyways. His love life has been reduced to nothing ever since Sophia dumped him a few months ago. There is somewhere he’d like to go before it’s closed, though: he’s heard Tony’s doing a couples’ discount to celebrate the day – a special Giant Pizza to share with your significant other for the price of a normal-sized one – and he well intends to get that discount, significant other or not. He just needs to choose whether he’s going to ask Charles or Gina to come with him.
While Charles might make things weird by unnecessarily getting a little too invested in their fake-romance, there’s a greater chance he’ll let him get the last slice of pizza and pick its flavour. Which Gina won’t.
Although this dilemma has been bugging him for far longer than it should now, it’s not what’s going around his mind as he follows the rest of the crowd and lets these strangers try out their keys on his lock. His eyes are scanning the room for any potential suspicious doings among the participants and all he can think about now are the possible phrases he could snap at their criminal when he and Amy finally catch him. The situation they’re currently stuck in gives room for some great lines – his head is literally buzzing with what he considers are smart ideas.
“Seems like it’s been a waste of time.” A voice and a sigh eventually take him out of his reverie when Amy joins him at his corner of the room after a full hour has past and nothing noticeable happened. “I didn’t even find my match! I tried all the locks, none of them fit with this damn key!” She brings said key into the air in an annoyed gesture to make her point. A pout starts forming on her face, making Jake let out a small chuckle – of course she’d get caught up in the game, no matter how stupid it was, and get upset she didn’t ‘win.’
“Samesies! I didn’t find my match either!” He wants to reassure her, an amused grin lighting up his whole face until realization suddenly hits him and his smug smile fades at once. His eyes switch from her key to his lock and back to her face. He sees her ears starting to turn red in a blush as she stares right back at him. Jake sneaks a quick glance at the people around; they’re all gathered in pairs, standing closely with their hips attached together while already getting lost in conversations or each other’s eyes. He and Amy are the only ones left without someone, which can only mean one thing: they’re each other’s matches.
“I see you two finally found each other! Congratulations, it’s better late than never!” The woman in charge of the event interrupts them before they have the chance to let out a single word. She puts her hands on both their shoulders to encourage them to take a step closer towards one another. She’s literally beaming with excitement, clearly not feeling the tension that has fallen between the two friends nor reading the look on their faces. “Why don’t you try it out?” she insists. “I’m sure it’ll fit!” She lets out a giggle as she winks at them.
It looks like they don’t have any other choice than to oblige to make her leave them alone and Amy seems to get that. She extends the hand that’s holding her key towards Jake’s waist where the lock is attached. He watches intently as she slowly puts the key in, unable to look away with his heart pounding faster and faster in his chest the closer Amy gets to his body. He stops breathing for a second when she inadvertently grazes his thigh with the tip of her fingers when she grabs the lock. Once the key is secured, she turns it around, and at first it does go in perfectly. Until it doesn’t anymore.
Amy pushes a little harder, her brows furrowed with focus as she does, but no matter how much force she applies, the key still doesn’t move. Even when she gives up and tries to simply take it out, it seems that she can’t.
“It’s stuck,” she announces as she brings her gaze back on Jake and the other woman. His eyes widen.
“What?”
“It’s stuck,” she repeats. She tries to stay calm but her partner can see she’s starting to freak out a little at the idea of them being unable to draw apart.
“Let me see.” She takes her hands away to give him space and Jake replaces her at attempting to unlock the key. He comes out just as successful as Amy.
“Yeah, it is stuck.” He watches as her expression falls deeper in distress.
“This is true love!” Once again, the woman beside them doesn’t seem able to read the room as she lets out a dreamy sigh.
“What?!” Their attention suddenly switches towards her and they snap.
“Don’t you see? This is fate! You two are meant to be together. You’re literally unable to let go even if you want to.” She points at the lock and the key keeping their bodies close. Her eyes are literally shining.
Jake and Amy exchange a look. The expression on their faces soften, shyly fixing their gaze onto the other. They remain dead silent for a beat.
In his chest, Jake’s heart is back at it again with the pounding. He can’t take what the woman just said out of his head. Not that he believes in fate or anything – really, he doesn’t – but he has to admit she’s got a point: he has been starting to think about Amy romantic-stylez again for a few weeks now, even thinking about possibly asking her out and not doing the same mistake he did the previous year to wait until she’s with someone to let her know how he feels.
Maybe this is his sign he should finally act on it instead of always postponing it like the coward he’s been. Because that woman is at least right about one thing: it does seem like he’s unable to let go of Amy even when he tried so hard to.
Watching her, Jake senses that Amy’s lost in her thoughts as well, but he couldn’t tell what’s going on her mind right now – is she disgusted by such a thought or on the contrary, does she think about what they could be like in a relationship and liking it?! He knows there’s only one way to know: ask her. But there’s no way he’s gonna do so while being literally stuck together at this insane single people matchmaking event.
It takes a good 15 minutes of awkward standing next to each other, doing their best not to invade each other’s space too much despite their condition before the event’s planner eventually goes looking for something to break the lock and break them free. They remain uncharacteristically – especially for Jake – silent the whole ride back, both lost in their own heads. It’s only by the end of the day, when things have started to be normal again between them that Jake, who’s been sneaking a few glances at Amy while packing their things before they head home, eventually stops and takes the floor.
“So… Do you have any plans for tonight?”
“Nope. It’s only me, my bed and a good book. My one true love.” Amy lets out a satisfied sigh as she looks up from her desk and back at him. “What about you?”
Jake pauses for a moment. He starts to play with the handle of his bag in a nervous tic. He’s barely able to meet her eyes anymore.
“Well…” He clears his throat. “There’s this couples’ discount at Tony’s that I was hoping to use tonight.”
“Oh, so you’ve got a date?” She shoots him a smile before she seems to suddenly realize something. “Wait, don’t tell me it’s that girl from the matchmaking event who tried three times to unlock your lock with her key. That woman was desperate. Though I have to give it to her, she was persistent.”
Jake chokes out a laugh.
“Do I sense some jealousy in your voice, Santiago?” He teases then quickly falls serious again. He takes a deep breath before talking again to help get some confidence. “Actually, I was thinking maybe you’d like to come with me? It’s great pizza. And there’s this great deal…” He pitifully attempts to sell it to her without showing how much he’s dying for her to say yes to his offer.
He’s not so sure why he didn’t think about her before. Or maybe he does: though there’s no one he’d rather go out with, he was honestly picturing something fancier for a first date. Not that he asked her on a date. But still.
In front of him, Amy remains speechless for a moment. She stares at him with a confused frown creasing between her brows that weirdly turns into a laugh.
Her reaction makes Jake’s heart clench in his chest.
“Are you asking me to be your fake-girlfriend for tonight?!”
“Maybe…?” he trails off hesitantly. “It’s not like you’d have to really fake anything though,” he quickly clarifies. “I don’t think they’ll check that we’re a real couple. But y’know, we can go elsewhere if you don’t like that place.” The words leave his mouths before he can think about them.
“Isn’t the discount at that one place the reason why you want us to have dinner together, though?” She stares back at him. She now seems as lost as ever.
Clearly, Jake didn’t think this through. Because on the one hand, he doesn’t want for her to think he’s not interested in her – it’s time he stops running and finally admits his feelings, he realized that earlier already – but on the other hand he doesn’t want her to believe he’d take her to such a cheap place with a cheap ‘two-for-one’-like deal date on a first date.
If she is to agree on going out with him someday, he’s gonna do it right.
He’s kinda stuck right now, and it’s all his fault.
“Yeah, you’re right,” he tells her in the end.
Another chance missed, he blames himself – even more so when his answer is met with nothing but silence for a while.
“Okay.” Amy eventually talks again after a moment of consideration. She startles him with her words. He didn’t think she’d accept anymore. But she does. “I’ll come with you,” she agrees with a soft smile.
Dinner goes perfectly. As always when he’s with her, Jake spends the entire time teasing and laughing and talking about everything and anything – overall, he’s having a great time. And it seems that Amy is enjoying their night too, if he’s to judge by the huge happy grin that hasn’t left her features ever since they entered the restaurant two hours ago already.
Time flew by like never before.
“Here, have the last slice.” He pushes the almost-empty box closer to her side of the table to emphasize his offer.
Amy’s eyes open big in front of him for a second, as if in shock, before she lets out a lighthearted chuckle and takes the slice. “Wow, such a gentleman, Peralta! Do you do that with each of your dates or should I feel extra-lucky tonight?!” She mocks but he doesn’t snap back. He watches her intently instead, his heart warming up in his chest at the sound of her laugh.
Now’s the time to be honest, he decides.
“First of all, I’ll have you know I am a gentleman on a date.” He sees as she amusedly shakes her head. “And second, this is not a date anyways. Because it would imply I dared to take you on a cheap date. Which I wouldn’t.”
“Oh yeah? And where would you take me?” Her voice is part-amused, playing along, and part-serious as she fixes her eyes deep into his.
“I guess… somewhere fancier? Like a restaurant with a French name, that’s fancy. But not too fancy. You know I’m in debt. I would not take advantage of any discount, though.”
Amy closes her eyes for a second, as if trying to picture the place.
“Hm, yeah, sounds pretty good,” she says with a smile – it’s soft and there’s no hint of teasing in her eyes anymore. It startles Jake how sincere she sounds.
“Really? You’d come with me? On a date?”
He catches the blush that’s starting at the tip of her ears following his question. Adorable, he can’t help but think. Her answer takes him out of his contemplation.
“I don’t know. Are you asking me to go on a date?” Amy stares at him.
Jake offers her a tender smile. “Maybe…?” And instantly her features soften. She smiles back at him.
“Then yes, I guess.”
His eyes light up at her words and he can’t retain his grin. He feels happier than he’s ever been all of a sudden – though a little nervous as well.
He can hardly believe this is happening.
“Great. Cool cool cool. We could go tomorrow, then?” he offers. They still haven’t gone separate ways from this one dinner together but he doesn’t want to waste more time than they already have in the past. “I mean, if you want,” he still adds not to sound too excited. But Amy only replies with a beam of her own.
“Tomorrow’s great.”
(He doesn’t wait for their real date either, even if it’s only on the next day, to kiss her goodnight when he brings her home later that night. The way she kisses him back, just as fervently and hooking her arms around his neck to keep him close while his run up her back make him realize that Amy is just as unwilling to waste time as he is. They do wait until their real date the next day to end up at his apartment though, a little intoxicated from the few drinks they had and the bliss of another fun evening spent together as well as the start of something good.)
Hi! It’s your b99 valentine here with a tough question: what’s your favourite ever episode of b99?
Ughhh it’s super hard indeed but I think I’ll go for HalloVeen. For a while I said Jake & Amy was my favorite because I’m a sucker for wedding episodes and well, I love these two with my whole heart and I’m still amazed at the fact that they’re truly married and that butt joke is still too much for me to handle but in hindsight, I loved HalloVeen better. It has everything I could ask for: a story that brings the whole squad together (the Halloween heist), the iconic Cheddar/Holt duo and other amazing dynamics with almost everyone interacting with each other, the biggest surprise with the proposal (seriously, I wanted it to happen during the heist but didn’t think it would), Jake and Amy flashbacks (domestic AND their first encounter – that’s what dreams are made of, really) and yeah overall it was a very great, very fun and very emotional episode and I could (and have) rewatch it tons of times without ever getting tired of it.
(Plus we got two kisses in one episode and those are rare nowadays.)
(Non-Peraltiago-related though, I also hold very dear to my heart episodes in which the whole squad – or almost – is together like Beach House or Tactical Village or Cop-Con or The Party etc. etc. And the pilot, for some reason – when I didn’t like it too much the first time I watched it haha *shame on me*.)
(Lmao sorry for that long answer… what’s your favorite?)
Hi 👋 it’s your b99 valentine checking in one last time – I can’t wait for the big reveal tomorrow!!
ME TOO I can’t wait to know who you are!!! These events are so exciting haha I hope you’re having a great day today and I guess I’ll meet you tomorrow then :D
Hi – it's your b99 valentine! Sorry it's been a while – I've been suuuppeerr busy!! Although not as busy as you've been from looking at your blog!!! I hope it's all going well 😁😁😁😁 congrats on everything that's happening right now!!! 🎉🎉🎉🎉 I'm so happy for you – another b99 related question – apart from stuff we already know about, what else would you like to see in season 6? And if we get a season 7, what would you like to see in that?
No problem at all! I totally get it. I hope it’s nice things that keep you busy though :)
And thank you!!! It’s going pretty well yeah, though I still need some time to get used to this new life I guess. But it’s gonna be great I’m sure :D
As for your question... I’m not sure what more I could ask for this season because from what we know, it seems pretty great already? I would love to see the Holt/Kevin wedding renewal but I don’t think it’ll happen this season so maybe in season 7? Also one of my biggest wishes was to meet Amy’s brothers and it seems like we’re going to so... related to that, I’d love to see a flashback of young Amy! Also if we don’t get a season 7, I need a pregnancy reveal for Peraltiago in season 6. Otherwise I’d love it to happen in season 7, I think it would be perfect timing! Oh and also for season 6, another episode where the whole squad is involved together (I know we’ll have a heist) but like something similar to the Jimmy Jabs or Beach House etc.!
It’s your b99 valentine again!!! I think my favourite episodes are probably 48 Hours and Jake and Amy, just because I find 48 hours so rewatchable (is that even a word idk lol) and Jake and Amy because the Wedding – anyway, hope you’re having a great day!
I love 48 Hours too! I rewatched it several times as well. Thank you, I hope you’re having a great day too :D
