I was once friends with this gay guy in highschool, and then we stopped talking after graduation. After graduation, I also found out I'm a woman. That was three years ago, and I'm now over one year on E.
When I was at a cafe nearby with a friend, I ran into him again.
There was this weird feeling of dread in me when I spotted him, but against my instincts I went and said hello to him after getting our drinks. Immediately after telling him who I am, his eyes went wide and he said, "Oh, you're a femboy now? "I told him no, that I'm a woman.
He made a weird face, and that feeling of dread solidified. "You're not at woman yet, definitely femboy. I'd still hit that."
I was so disgusted and flabbergasted, and I looked towards my friend to see if she saw. She did. Just didn't say or do anything.
I quickly said bye to him, and left the cafe with my friend.
Outside, I asked her why the hell she didn't do anything (like I've done for her several times before), and she told me she thought it was cute, and she's not homophobic.
...
It's been a day, I've ranted so much about this (not just here), but I still don't fucking know how to react that isn't just a nuclear explosion in her face.
She's never said anything disgusting like that before, but that was awful. I don't know what to do. I don't know if this is dramatic but I don't want to be her friend anymore honestly, friends with somebody who's priorities are that fucked up. But I don't know. what to do.
Not even my other trans friends have any real advice, except to calmly explain why what she did is wrong. But girl I feel like she should already know! She watched a guy degender and sexually harass me, and did nothing! Except call it cute! I don't care how much fucking yaoi this woman consumes, she's a grown ass adult with a working brain!
This is trans-misogyny and everytime a trans woman shares a story about something like this, a support system and someone they thought they could trust being completely unphased by and even perpetuating their abuse, it breaks my heart. This is too common.
Additionally, it's disgusting people genuinely think a "femboy" is such a better thing than a woman. They truly just refuse to see us as people.
