I didn’t listen to the signs.
My friend set me up on a date. She wouldn’t tell me too much about it, which wasn’t a good sign.
All I knew was that he was Russian and worked in computer data. I kept asking her if he had a sense of humor, and she kept evading the question. Really not a good sign.
But I said yes.
So we were set to meet for dinner, but my friend changed it to just drinks, to save the potential awkwardness of a long drawn out meal.
A really bad sign.
The date time got moved around a lot, and I was running late to get to the bar. I had texted him that I’d be a few minutes late, and when I got to the bar and saw him, I knew it wasn’t going to be a match.
I had absolutely no physical attraction to the guy whatsoever. And granted some people may become more attracted to people as time wears on, I inherently knew this wasn’t going to be the case.
But I slapped on a big smile, brightened up and cheerfully greeted him.
He was upset that I had come late and it was cutting it close to being able to get the Happy Hour pricing on the drinks.
Yeah, this guy’s a winner.
He asked me if I wanted anything, and I wasn’t too hungry, but I mentioned I was a vegetarian. He asked if it would bother me if he ordered chicken wings, I told him no. And generally it doesn’t bother me when people eat meat in front of me, I know I have a different diet from everyone else and therefore, I’m the one that needs to adjust my sensibilities. What I DO mind, however is that he wasn’t very liberal with the use of his napkin. Chicken wings are greasy and crumbly and I don’t need to see the remnants of your meal on your face throughout the date.
Dirty Dancing was playing on the tv screens, and I mentioned how much I loved the movie. He said he loved the movie too, but he’s never seen it all the way through. WHAT??? A) how do you know if you love something if you don’t know the full thing? B) How have you lived 36 years on this planet (90% of which were in this country) and not have seen Dirty Dancing? C’mon!!
Huge sign!
He then mentioned that he didn’t like to be bothered at work, he turned off his email so people wouldn’t interrupt him, he hated when people stopped him from what he was doing to ask him things. Um….. that’s what’s called being in a company and working towards the goal of advancing the company’s positions, helping co-workers together so you can all achieve the same goal helps the company overall, right? But he mentioned that they were stupid and who am I to argue his fine-tuned morality?
He then mentioned that his father just died. What do you say to that, except I’m sorry and then wait for the awkward silence that fills the space to ease up? Which let’s be honest, it never really did
So I had basically checked out of the conversation at this time, I had tried to be cute, tried to joke around, and tried to have a dialogue but it wasn’t coming forth. He went on to say that a friend of his had organized a closet and posted it online and that was stupid of her to post it online. I mentioned if she was trying to start an organizing business, it was probably a smart thing to do. He replied a professional organizer didn’t have a complex job implying it wasn't as important as his job because all they do is clean closets and that’s easy to do, I lost it. How dare he make that type of statement. Aside from the fact that these people do work hard and many time complex jobs where they often times have to deal with mental health issues, the arrogance of stating something like that is off the charts. And so what if someone doesn’t have a ‘complex job’ they’re making a living doing something and giving themselves a career that’s benefiting other people, who is he to talk down to anyone’s career regardless of what he perceives as a level of complexity? (Sorry got riled up again) Is the person who works at a grocery store any less significant in their job because it’s not what he deems as being complex? Wait till you’re standing in line for more than 10 minutes wondering what the hold up is, then talk to me about job importance. (Ok, I’m done).
Then he went on to try to find some common ground between us. He was interested in discussing my MBA program. He wanted me to explain what classes were beneficial to my current position and talk about the nuances of the economics classes vs. the accounting classes. You know, the classic romantic stuff that turns every girl on.
He then went on to ridicule our mutual acquaintance and I was out, I told him to wrap it up, I wanted to go home. I went to the bathroom just to get away from him for a few minutes.
I asked him where he parked his car, and thankfully mine was in the opposite direction.
As we left the restaurant, I turned to him and said it was nice to meet him, goodbye. Nothing more.
He texted me a few hours later telling me what a great night he had and letting me know he was up for another date with me.
Talk about not reading the signs.
What date was he on that he thought that was successful?