Bad body image thoughts last night, today and it feels like it will not stop
Another argument with my dad for no reason, because apparently all I do is wrong and he would rather pay an hotel room for me then have me stay at the house
I miss the boy pretty badly and I’m afraid of what might or might not happen. I’m afraid to say to much or too little, I’m sick of talking on the phone with him. Last night I ranted/cried my frustration about my dad to him, and all I wanted was for him to hug me and tell me it would be ok, but no he’s 5 hours away and I’m alone
Today is not a good day, I just have to go through it, I feel like the rest of the week will be similar so I just have to go though it and work my way up to a better one next week.
I’m nervous for so many things and reason and it’s not good. (Grad school application, GRE exam, Tech Paper, relationship, Worlds, ...)
At least I swam a very decent practice this morning, it was one of these practice that I felt good in the water, felt like I was swimming well and fast. I love swimming when everything else is bad because I can’t think about it or else I miss my laps count. (4000m, 1h20)
I get to see the boy in 9 days and then again the weekend after
I’m excited for school to start and have my routine back