Warnings: talks of a 3 way relationship (wrote this a long time before the other one in bingo) episode based, protective Rafael and Nick, fluff.
WC: 459
Enjoy x
The heat of the late afternoon sun and the tension was thick in Rafael’s office. Everyone else had left and it was just you, Nick and Rafael. Nick was standing at the end of Rafael’s desk with his arms crossed over his body, his brows frowned, Rafael looking very much the same standing behind his desk, his hands on his hips and his brows frowned at you,
“You two are really going to carry on like this? Liv and Brian will be there. Amanda and Fin too” you tried to reason.
“Have you heard his stuff?” Nick spat “What it’s all about? what he is? what he causes? Y/N-”
“Nick, it’s my job- Our job” you raised your voice.
“Neither of us are going, we can’t keep you safe” Rafael added.
“I’ am going with four other people, Rafael” you crossed your arms over your body.
“You are so stubborn” Nick muttered.
“Last time I checked it was something both of you liked about me” you shot back, both of them raising their eye brows at you “Give me one good reason why?”
“Because we care about you” Nick shot back.
“And because we asked you not too” Rafael looked straight at you.
You looked between them both and then rolled your eyes sighing. Both men walked to you, each grabbing a hand. Nick took your hand in both of his, his thumbs rubbing over the back of it, Rafael brought your hand up to his lips and kissed your knuckles,
“Baby, do you get why we feel like this?” Nick whispered.
“We aren’t doing this for any other reason, other than the fact that we love and care about you” Rafael pleaded with you.
“I know. I know, and your both right. But you both can’t keep doing this. None of us are ready to go public yet, and if you two keep stopping me from doing what we need to because your worried about keeping me safe, someone is going to click on and I’ am not willing to say that I’ am only with one of you just to keep it hushed up”
“We know” Nick looked down.
“We don’t want to keep it a secret for much longer either” Rafael lent over and peaked your lips.
“Let’s not worry about that tonight” Nick grinned down at you, his hand coming up to your face, resting on your cheek and he then lent over and peaked your lips “We are going to take you out for dinner”
“And then go back to mine for dessert” Rafael smirked.
Warnings: talks of a break up and sweet and Fluffy Nick and Rafael.
WC: 976
Enjoy x
It’s not how you had planned your life to be, yet here you were, your whole life had fallen apart and you didn’t know what to do. You should have taken time off, but it was the middle of a big trial that you and Nick cracked the case and were the arresting officers. Nick and Rafael had picked up that something was wrong, although you were excellent on the stand during court, you had been turning up late to work, bags under your eyes, your eyes red and blood shot, your hair thrown up in whatever way and your cloths clean but not ironed.
Nick was waiting for you on the steps of the court house, when you came bolting up the stairs, he could see your face was red and your hair wasn’t even done,
“Y/N, what’s going on?”
“Nothing” you snapped back and he saw the tears come to your eyes “Let’s go, Rafael will be pissed if I’ am late again”
You did your job on the stand, keeping your cool during cross, but Nick and Rafael both noticed that you had been crying when you walked to the stand. Nick was surprised that you didn’t come back to the gallery and when court was done, he and Rafael made the quick walk to the station to try and find you when you didn’t answer your phone,
“Do you know what’s going on? I have never seen her like this before” Rafael looked over at Nick as they rode up in the lift.
“No, she wouldn’t tell me this morning” They both rounded into the bullpen, it well after everyone’s shift. Nick saw your bag sitting under your desk “She’s still here”
Nick walked off, Rafael following close behind making their way to the small gym near the on-call room. Nick saw you through the slightly open blinds and he stopped in his tracks, Rafael almost bumping into him and they both watched on. Your hair was up in a messy bun, your button down open to your tank top, you had no shoes on punching and kicking into the bag, it wasn’t till you turned when the bag swung that they both saw your face, bright red, you biting your lip and tears gushing from your eyes.
They both rushed for the door, Nick opened it and they walked in just as you started to punch the bag over and over sobbing hard. Rafael rushed over to you first, grabbing you and you fell into his arms sobbing into his jacket and you sunk to your knees, Rafael moving down to the floor with you, holding you tight to his chest. Nick ran to the small fridge grabbing a bottle of water, rushing back dropping to his knees, pulling off the gloves and handing you the water.
You took the water from Nick sipping on it slowly, Rafael ran his hand up and down your back and Nick ran his up and down your thigh. The tears finally slowed and you took a deep breath sniffing and looking between them both,
“I’ am so sorry” you wiped your eyes with the back of your hand.
“Why are you sorry?” Rafael kissed your head.
“You haven’t done anything to be sorry for” Nick squeezed your thigh “What’s going on, Y/N? you haven’t been yourself”
“Everything” you sighed “For years, I dealt with it. Put a smile on my face and then just like that, I’ am left to pick myself up, again. I have to find somewhere to live, I’ve been staying in an hotel, most of my stuff is in storage. It’s a mess”
Nick looked at Rafael, both their brows frowning. Rafael titled your head up with his pointer finger and you looked into his green eyes, both of Nick’s hands now on your thigh,
“Did he put his hands on you?” Rafael tried to hide the snarl in his voice.
“No. Just broke me”
Rafael pulled you into him wrapping you in his arms and Nick grabbed your hand squeezing it and kissing the back of it,
“Come and live with me” Nick smiled at you “I have 3 rooms, would be nice to come home to someone. We can split everything”
“You’re really sweet Nick, but living with me and working with me? What if we fight”
“You don’t fight with Amaro” Rafael laughed “You bat your eye lashes and he gives you whatever you want”
“You’re one to talk, Barba” Nick shot back at Rafael, Rafael rolling his eyes back “Y/N, you don’t need to put yourself back together. Let us do it” Nick’s hand went to your cheek, his thumb on your chin.
“For once I agree with him” Rafael winked at you “You’re not alone hermosa. He was a jerk. Amaro and I want to be there for you, to look after you” Rafael pushed your hair out of your face “We love you Y/N, you’re one of the best things that has happened to me”
“Me too” Nick cut in.
You looked between them both, smiled small and then hugged them both,
“Are you sure you’re happy to live with me?” you looked at Nick and he nodded back “Will you come and visit?” you looked at Rafael,
“Whenever you want me too” Rafael smiled
“Just bat your eye lashes” Nick winked as he got to his feet, grabbing your hand pulling you up to your feet, you then helping Rafael to his,
“What do you say to beer and pizza? Our treat” Rafael grinned.
“And you come home with me tonight” Nick smiled.
You hooked your arms around their necks pulling them both in for another hug, Nick’s hand going to the small of your back and Rafael’s on your hip,
Rafael Barba x Reader. For summer smut bingo - squirting. Obvs, NSFW/18+ for smut. CW: p in v sex, fingering, dirty talk. @madpanda75 here’s that fic based off that gif.
Based off the Voire Dire series - a peak into the relationship. Set around part 3 but before the ending (spoiler: where it’s hinted they’ll be engaged).
WC: 1246 or something around that.
**
“So what are your plans for tonight?” Marjorie asked, hopping on your desk. She bit off the end of a red vine.
“Nothing much, just a movie and dinner with Rafi.” You replied as you looked up to her from your computer. “We both have been working so late these last two weeks, we’ve hardly seen each other.”
“So Netflix and chill?” Marjorie replied. A small smile twitched across her face.
You rolled your eyes. “Something like that.”
**
You snuggled up next to Rafael, as you both watched the movie. His arm wrapped around you and you leaned into his embrace, your head resting on his shoulder.
“Babe, can you please hand over my wine?” You asked, your eyes never leaving the screen.
“Of course.” Rafael replied. As he was bringing the wine over to you, you happened to reach over to grab some popcorn that was made earlier and your hands collided. Red wine spilled all over your abdomen and lap. You let out a swear and jumped up, which then knocked the popcorn over, spilling onto the floor.
It was Rafael’s turn to swear. He reached for the remote to pause the movie and squatted down to pick up the popcorn. “Go get clean, I’ve got this.”
You mumbled a thanks and dashed to your bedroom to strip. You changed into an oversized t-shirt, not bothering with bottoms and then made your way to the laundry room to treat your clothes.
When you reappeared in the living room, you noted that Rafael had refreshed your glass and the popcorn had been cleared.
You sat back down on the couch and Rafael wrapped his arm around you, bringing you close to him. As the movie continued, you absentmindedly traced concentric circles along his thigh. You then became acutely aware of Rafael’s hand sliding up the side of your shirt and then back down again. You let out a small hum and Rafael turned to you. His piercing green eyes were blown with lust and he bent his head down to capture your lips with his. You leaned up into the kiss and moved so you were sitting on his lap, each of your legs outside his. The kiss intensified, with Rafael’s tongue pressing against the entrance of your mouth. You parted your lips eagerly, kissing him deeply, slipping your tongue into his mouth. You could taste the scotch he had been having and whatever made him distinctively him. You were nearly dizzy from the kiss and his cologne added to that sensation. Rafael ran his fingers along your thighs and you pressed against him, desperate for more.
It took you by slight surprise then when he turned you around, so your back was to his. You could feel his cock pressing against you and you reveled in the fact that you were giving him this reaction.
Rafael’s hands went up to your tits, rolling, pulling, and squeezing your nipples between his fingers. You rested your head on his shoulder and shuddered as his beard prickled against your sweet spot. His lips found purchase along your neck and his hands moved from your breasts to where you were most needy. He spread your thighs and rubbed you through your panties which were already soaked with arousal. He pushed the ruined material to the side, rubbing your bundle of nerves before moving down to tease your dripping pussy.
You let out a wrecked moan as he set a repetitive pace, teasing you. Your hips began to take a life of their own as they rolled on their own accord. Rafael sunk his fingers all the way in - two, not one and you let out a cry at the feeling. “Just wait until it’s my cock.” He rumbled against your ear. One of your hands covered his as he fingerfucked you, and the other gripped his arm.
You were soaked, his fingers making obscene squelching sounds as he continued. “Oh God, oh God.” You chanted breathlessly.
“Not God.” Rafael rasped. “Just me.” He set off a brutal pace, thrusting harder and deeper. Another finger slid in and you shuddered, letting out a deep groan. Rafael curled his fingers, finding that sweet spot and stayed there.
Your legs began to shake and your eyes slammed shut as suddenly you stiffened. Your orgasm exploded over and like a dam bursting, you squirted all over his hand and lap. Hearing you cry out his name only encouraged Rafael and he resumed his pace, requesting another from you.
“Otra vez.” Rafael commanded. Your body complied with his request as you squirted again.
“Muy bien.” Rafael praised. “Such a good girl for me.”
You shuddered again and when Rafael removed his fingers, you let out a whine of disappointment. You shifted around to face Rafael who was licking his fingers. You took his hand and stuck it in your own mouth, finishing the job.
You then scooted back on his thighs, just so you could work the zipper of his dark denim. You reached in and pulled his cock out of his pants and boxers. Rafael groaned, watching under heavy lidded eyes as you stroked him. You swung your leg over him again and guided his cock into you.
You both groaned at the sensation as he filled you to the hilt. You shifted and reached for the hem of your shirt, yanking it off you. Your hands were on Rafael encouraging him to do the same. He tugged off his shirt and his hands gripped your hips. You braced your hands onto his shoulder and began to ride him, craving more.
“Ah, fuck your pussy feels so good.” Rafael crooned. His head dipped to your breasts and you groaned as latched onto one, sucking.
You moaned your approval and began to ride Rafael more fervently. You both chased your orgasms, with Rafael thrusting up in long, hard strokes. You reached down and began to rub your clit. Rafael swatted your hand away and took over. You fell forward, crashing your lips against his. Your nails dug into the tops of his shoulders and your pussy clenched around his cock.
“I’m coming!” You cried out, breaking the kiss.
“Come for me.” Rafael encouraged. His voice was husky. He pulled your face down to crash his lips against yours once more.
The kissing was sloppy, mimicking the sloppiness of Rafael’s thrusts. As your orgasm swept you, Rafael felt his burst. “Shit, I’m coming too!”
“Give it to me!” You cried out, as you rode out the remains of your orgasm. Rafael thrusted up once, hard and came. A string of Spanish obscenities left his mouth as he painted your walls with his cum.
You were both still, catching your breaths, willing your heartbeats to slow down. Rafael wrapped his arms around you, holding you as both recovered.
Rafael pressed a kiss to your sweaty forehead and then to your lips. “That was fun.”
“Yeah, way better than watching a movie.” You laughed as you eased yourself off of him.
“I’m going to go to the bathroom.” You remarked. “But maybe we can take this to the bedroom. Mind turning everything off here?”
Rafael nodded as he stood, tucking his now softened cock away. “Will do, cariño. That is a way better plan than any movie.”
You blew a kiss over your shoulder and made your way to the bathroom. You couldn’t wait to see what else the night had in store.
You came to the surface of the water, blinking your eyes till they were clear enough to see Rafael wiping his face dry. His eyes met yours and a big smile spread across his face. He made his way towards you, both arms going around you and you wrapped your legs around him, both your naked bodies pressed together, as he started to walk you around the water,
“Thank you, mi Vida, for planning this”
“Of course, Rafi, it’s been a long time coming. I just can’t believe I had you talk you into it” you giggled.
“I know mi Amor, but it’s summer and it’s been busy”
“Rafi” you grabbed his cheeks, pushing his head back so he would look at you “If the DA’s office and Liv can’t handle us being away for one week” you raised and eye brow and he nodded back “And besides, look at this place- Rafi we have our own pool”
“We do” Rafael smirked as he started to walk you both to the edge of the pool, pushing you up against it.
His hands moved from your waist to come up to cup your breasts, his hips pressing into you. Your hands came up to thread into his wet hair scrapping them across his sculp. In a heartbeat Rafael grabbed your hips, pulling you away from the wall and walking you both to the stairs. As you got to them, you pulled out of his embrace, swimming to the stairs and standing on the second one so you were out of the water. Rafael came up behind you, his fingers brushing through your lower lips, playing with them till they started to cover in your wet.
Rafael stood up behind you, his hand going to the middle of your back and he pushed you forward, you landing flat on your hands, and he slid up into you. He gave you both a minute before he rolled his hips up into you in a slow and steady pace, one of his hands still in the middle of your back and his other going around to your clit rubbing it in time with his thrusts. You fell onto your elbows and your moans started to fill the outdoor area, your coil winding tighter and tighter,
“Yes Rafi, like that, you feel amazing” you panted.
Rafael started to pound into you, the hand from your back now on your hip slamming you back into him. Your head dropped down and your eyes slammed shut when your coil snapped, your release flooding your body. Rafael’s thrusted into you feverishly, his balls slapping into you before a loud grunt and your name spilled from his mouth and he came deep inside you. Rafael pulled out, turned you to face him, both your chests heaving as he wrapped his arms around you, kissing you deeply.
“That was amazing” Rafael muttered into your lips “I like this whole holiday thing”
You giggled pulling back from him, wrapping your arms around his neck,
“So, we can do this again next summer?”
“As long as we have our own pool, you’ll get no objection from me”
Rafael Barba x Reader. CW: angst, gun violence, language. Episode references: Nationwide Manhunt (SVU) & The Song of Gregory William Yates (CPD). WC: 1200 (1454)
AN: Another non-smut chapter? Who am I? Forgive me for typos.
AN2: I am starting off with a tiny snippet of ch.3′s ending only because it’s been awhile since I updated, hence the word count difference noted above.
--
The next morning, Rafael knocked on your hotel door, hoping to check in on you. You opened the door, clad in nothing but an oversized t-shirt, that barely skimmed the tops of your thighs. Rafael swallowed hard.
“Hey – “ Rafael began. His voice trailed as he looked past your shoulder, watching Adam walk in the background.
“What’s up? I told Liv I’d be down in 20. Has there been an update?”
“Um, yeah – overnight Carisi and Rollins apprehended Rudnick. He was discovered hiding in a docked boat by Caroga Lake. Rudnick suffered multiple injuries.” Rafael replied. Adam joined from behind, tugging on his shirt. Rafael ignored him, focusing on you.
“I'm not shedding any tears.” You replied, as you crossed your arms.
“Yates hobbled him - broke both his knees, his ankles, pierced his eardrum. Just left him to die.” Rafael continued.
“Is he talking yet?”
“Only to Carisi, and he's in and out of consciousness. He did indicate the plan was to cross the border at the Saint Lawrence River.”
You pushed past Adam and grabbed your jeans, which were laying on a heap on the floor. “Come on – lets go.”
“What are you going to do?” Rafael asked.
You holstered your gun. “What I should have done a long time ago.”
“Olivia…”
“Olivia nothing. Now, Rafael – just get out of my way.”
Rafael looked at Adam. “You’re going to let her just go after a serial killer?” Adam scoffed. “No. I’ll go with her. Now we’ll see you at the church.”
--
Rafael followed you to the elevator bank, basically nipping at your heels. “Y/N – don’t be foolish. This is exactly what Yates would want you to do.”
You ignored Rafael and pressed the down button repeatedly, as if doing so were to make the elevator arrive more quickly. “Y/N! Just stop!” Rafael put a hand on your shoulder. You spun, coming chest to chest with the prosecutor.
“Rafael, this is not your battle! Back off!” You snapped. The elevator dinged, signaling its arrival. Rafael moved to follow you and Adam stepped in front of you, blocking Rafael.
“Let her go man.” Adam replied sternly, outstretching his arm on the elevator side portal, preventing the door from closing.
Rafael looked past Adam’s shoulder, to you. “Y/N.”
You met his eyes, which like yours, were wet with unshed tears. “Rafael. Try to understand.”
Adam stepped aside and the door began to slowly shut. Rafael tried pressing the call button to prevent it from closing, but it was too late. Rafael swore loudly and took out his phone, making a call to Liv.
--
Back at the church, Rafael pushed past through the cornucopia of law enforcement, in hopes of spotting you. He spotted Liv and made way towards her.
“Liv!”
“I can't get a hold of Y/N.” The brunette lieutenant replied with worry etched on her face. She spotted Adam walking over in the distance.
“Adam!”
“Where’s Y/N?” Rafael asked angrily.
“Wait – she’s not here?” Adam asked as he placed his hands on his hips.
“I thought she was with you.” Rafael replied. “You two left together.”
“No. We split up. I followed a dead end. She followed another. Where’s Lindsay?”
“She’s not here either.” Liv replied, frowning. “Did Lindsay know Yates was headed north?”
“I guess... Dodds put an APB out on a pickup truck he hot-wired.”
“They’re both going after him.” Rafael replied. “I might have let out that Rudnick mentioned that the plan was to cross the border at the Saint Lawrence River.” Rafael replied, before letting out a slew of curse words in Spanish.
Amanda jogged over. “Liv, I just got word that Dodds is with Lindsey and Y/N.”
Liv grabbed her police radio. “Dodds, this is Liv – you need to turn around. Now.”
--
“Copy that, Lieutenant. Liv wants us to come back.” Mike replied, as he began to turn the car around.
“Yeah, I'm not doing that.” You replied. Lindsey nodded, as she leaned forward from the middle backseat. “I’m with Y/N on this.”
“Detectives, I know he killed someone close to you, but this isn't us anymore.” Mike reasoned.
Lindsey shook her head and from her peripheral vision, spotted an abandoned police car. “What the hell is that? There's been no radio traffic. Pull over.”
Mike brought the car to a stop. It had started to rain hard, coming down in sheets making the ground muddy and slippery with wet leaves. The three of you each drew out your guns and carefully canvassed the area. Lindsey spotted the body of the trooper.
“I got a trooper down!”
“Is he –” you asked, knowing full well the answer.
“He's gone. So's his gun!” Lindsey shouted as realization hit her.
The sound of gunshots filled the air. You all ran to take cover, but it was too late for Mike, as a bullet tore through his shoulder.
“Dodds!” You screamed.
Mike groaned as he made way behind the car. “Stay down. Take cover!” He reached for his radio. “This is Sergeant Dodds. Shots fired; two officers down. Suspect is armed and in flight. Requesting immediate backup. I repeat, immediate backup!” Mike groaned leaning against the car.
“Dodds, are you okay?” Lindsey asked rushing over.
“I'm fine. Just stay down.” You noticed a dark figure in the trees and you took off in hot pursuit.
“Detective, what are you doing? Detective, stay down!” Mike shouted.
Lindsey whipped her head around and took off after you. “Get back here! Wait for backup! Get back here! Detective!” Mike continued to shout.
You pursued Yates, firing your gun as you did so. Your lungs burned as you ran at full speed. Suddenly you were hit with searing pain at the knee. “Fuck!” You screamed. Your leg immediately buckled and you fell to the ground, your hands bracing against the wet ground. You leaned up slightly, but before you could do anything more, you were hit with another bullet, this time to your shoulder. You collapsed in pain, unable to move. The rain was cold but your shoulder and leg were warm as blood seeped through. Shakily you touched your shoulder, wincing as you touched the wound. You brought your hand to your face, seeing your fingertips coated in your blood.
“Y/N! Y/N – are you okay?” You looked up and saw Lindsey above you.
“Yates…” You gritted. “Go get the bastard.”
Lindsey nodded. “I’m coming back for you; I promise.” Then Lindsey took off.
Her footsteps trailed off and you focused your attention to the sky above you. You watched the rain fell; deep throbbing pain began to radiate through you. You were soaked to the bone and you began to shiver. You felt sleepy and your eyes fluttered close. The last image you had in your head was of Rafael at the elevator from earlier. Your face was wet – you could no longer tell what was rain and what were your tears. You forced your eyes to remain open, willing yourself to stay awake. It was too much and you felt yourself giving in.
‘Rafael – I am so sorry.’
--
Your eyes fluttered open, voices above you shouted nonsensical things; you could make out an intense bright light, but it was fuzzy. You could hear the urgency in the voices around you. Your brain made out the words – “subclavian artery” and “the one in the knee wasn’t through and through.” It took too much energy to stay awake; it was so much easier to give in to the darkness.
--
Rafael knocked gently on the door to your room. He carried a bouquet of orange roses. He winced, seeing you in bed, your shoulder in a sling as well as your leg. Adam looked up at him. “Hey.”
“How – how is she?” Rafael asked, as he made his way in.
Adam frowned. “She – she developed compartment syndrome. So they had to do another surgery. But they said with time, PT – lots of PT, she should be okay.”
“Another surgery? Jesus, fuck.” Rafael let out a long exhale.
Adam scratched his chin, eyeing Rafael up and down. He took a deep breath before talking. “You know, she talks about you. Non-stop.”
Rafael looked at the young detective in surprise. “She talks about me?”
Adam nodded. “Ever since she moved to New York. Her pain in the ass neighbor who she works with. Look, she and I…. what we had… at the time, it was great. It was great until it wasn’t. So yeah, she talks about you. Take that for what it is worth.”
Rafael let out another exhale. “Okay.”
Adam’s phone buzzed and he looked at it. “I gotta go, Yates is back in Chicago – but… but having been in this spot myself - when you're waking up, it’s better when there is someone is there. You shouldn’t be alone. It’s good that you are here.”
Rafael shook Adam’s hand. “Good luck.”
“Thanks. Take care of our girl.”
Rafael nodded and turned his attention back to you. He felt incredibly helpless seeing you. You seemed so small and fragile in the large hospital bed. He took out his phone and played your favorite Bach cantata. And when he was certain that Adam was gone – he dropped his head into his hands and cried.
CW: language, some suggestive language, some angst, tooth rotting fluff.
Prompts filled: “Hey if your inspired could you do prompt 26. "Do you think they can hear us through the tent?” “Yes we can.” With Barba and a new detective? Maybe the squad went on a camping trip? If you don’t have time then no worries!” @bre160997 plus “Hi, hun! If it's okay, could I request prompt 12 + 29 from the Lyric Starters? Maybe a fight with Barba in front of the SUV or something, I'm really just craving for angst from @i-t-s-a-n-d-y & finally, from @thefanficfaerie Dr. Who Challenge: “Then you stole me. And I stole you… What made you think I had any intention of ever giving you back.”
WC: 2118
--
“Did you hear? We are going to do some team building exercise this weekend?” Amanda groaned as you entered the locker room.
“What? No. I was going through a case file all afternoon with Barba.” You replied, as you gathered your belongings.
“Barba and Y/N sitting in a tree… k-i-s-s-i-n-g.” Amanda sang, which garnered a glare from you.
“Oh stop it!” You threw your jacket at Amanda who caught it. “It’s not like that.”
Amanda cocked her brow at you. You sighed, defeated. “Okay, it’s like that. But please don’t say anything to Olivia. Barba and I haven’t made it official. He keeps stalling. And there is a ton of disclosure paperwork that needs to be completed.”
“I’m aware – you forget Sonny and I…” Amanda wiggled her left hand at you. You rolled your eyes.
“I know – but it’s different. You and Carisi had a long history together. You each had rank. I’m the newbie.”
“And Barba is the hand that rocks the cradle.” Amanda snickered. “Why do you think he keeps stalling? It’s been six months.”
You grabbed your jacket from Amanda. “So what exactly is this team building exercise?” You asked, ignoring her question.
Truth be told, you were terrified as to why Rafael kept stalling.
--
“What the hell is this place?” You wondered out loud, as you stepped out of the SUV.
“Welcome to Bear Mountain!” Sonny replied, slapping his hand on your back. He walked past you and you watched as the rest of the team climbed out of the car.
“Fresh mountain air, private trails, a clean creek. We’re going to have ourselves a true mountain adventure and take to the wildness.” Oliva replied.
A woman with wild hair and a hippie dippy dress approached. She had a wide , friendly smile. “Are you the police group from NYC? SVU?”
Olivia nodded.
“Welcome, welcome! I’m Teres, and I am the owner of these grounds. “ Teres clapped her hands and the bangle bracelets she wore clinked together.
Sonny raised his brow and Amanda jabbed him in the ribs.
“These grounds are actually behind my family’s orchard and farm. We have tents set up for you all, but there is also a micro-cabin with a fully functioning bathroom and shower. While it seems like you have left the world behind, we are 10 minutes from the local grocer, diner, deli and pizza place. Barton’s Orchard is also a 15 minute drive. Tymor Park is 2 miles down the road. There you will find a swimming pool, more hiking trails, a lake for boating, volleyball courts and more.” Teres continued. “Is everyone here?”
Olivia looked around. “We’re waiting for one more.”
You turned to Liv. “Who else is coming?”
“Barba.” Olivia replied. “Thank you for having us, Teres.”
Amanda looked over at you and winked.
--
“The purpose of this weekend is to bring the team together. Now that we have Kat…” Olivia announced, smiling at the young detective. “And Y/N.” She smiled at you. “Carisi is our new ADA and Barba is our new Bureau Chief. Things at the one-six have shaken up. I thought this would be a nice way to get away from the hum-drum of the city and do some old-school bonding.”
At that moment, the rumble of a car approaching the grounds filled the air. You watched as Rafael got out of the cab. He was way over dressed naturally - this did not surprise you. He seemed awkward and out of place. He frowned looking around before his eyes met Liv’s and he smiled brightly. He walked over and said hello. You tried to say hi but he brushed you off and immediately you hated the weekend and wanted to go home.
Your whole life you lived by the motto that you don’t shit where you eat. You didn’t do workplace romances. Then you transferred to Manhattan SVU and had a random hook-up with one very sexy Cuban man after your first hard case who just happened to be the Bureau Chief. But after that one incident, in which you both swore could never happen again, you both couldn’t keep your hands off each other.
But it was a secret. Months and months passed. Now it was six months in. You kept wanting to tell Olivia – but Rafael kept saying it was not the right time. More and more, it felt like the guilt of the relationship was taking its toll. You finally caved one night to your partner, Amanda, spilling every last drop.
Amanda took the information in stride and promised she would keep it all under confidence. That said, she did enjoy occasionally ribbing you from time to time about it.
Night quickly approached. The whole time Rafael dodged you as best as he could. You pulled out your phone and wondered if you could fake an emergency to escape. The campsite claimed there was wi-fi but the connection was shitty.
“Hey.”
You looked up at Fin, who crouched next to you. “Hey.” You replied dejectedly while you nibbled at a s’more.
“You okay? You’ve been quiet all day. Not like you.” Fin replied. You sighed, watching Sonny and Amanda across the campsite with Rafael, laughing over God knows what.
“Yeah. Just tired. Camping isn’t my thing.” You replied. “I need to be in actual civilization.”
“I get that. I don’t do nature either.”
“I think… I am going to head to bed.” You replied standing. You stretched out your hand. “Want the rest of my s’more?”
“Nah, I’m good.” Fin replied. “Maybe Barba wants it. He’s always hungry.” He laughed and jutted his head towards the direction where Barba was.
You hummed and gave Fin a smile before heading to your tent. The ground was cold and hard. Sleep was futile.
It was one weekend. You could do this.
--
The next morning, breakfast was being had and Olivia was busy going over some of the bonding activities everyone was going to partake in. You decided to take your coffee to go, walking up a trail.
“Y/N, you shouldn’t go by yourself. Barba, why don’t you accompany her?” Amanda replied, with a wink to you. “Unless you want to go kayaking with us.”
You shot a look at Amanda. “I don’t need a babysitter.”
“Nonsense – everyone should be in pairs. You never know what could happen.” Olivia replied. “Besides this is about team morale and building.”
“Great.” You gritted. Rafael looked at you and gave you a small, forced smile.
“After you, detective. Lead the way.” Rafael replied.
The walk up the trail towards Tymor Park was mostly quiet between you. After you were far enough from the campsite, you whipped around and stepped in front of Rafael, causing him to take a step back.
“I was trying to get away from you!” You hissed.
“Look, Y/N, I don’t know why you are so upset with me.” Rafael began. “I told you I wasn’t ready to disclose.”
“When will you be ready? Why don’t you respect me or our relationship?” You replied, sitting on a rock.
“That’s not true – you know I respect you. It is just complicated.”
“No, it’s not. You are making it complicated.” You watched as a white butterfly flitted by.
Rafael sighed and sat on a rock next to you. “I thought we wouldn't last a month. But then we did, and then another month, and I'm still not sure how this happened.”
Rafael pulled your chin to face him. You jutted your chin out from his grasp. ““It feels like you don’t care.” You scoffed. You stood and crossed your arms. “Well?” You asked, exasperated when Rafael didn’t immediately respond. Your eyes began to shimmer with tears that threatened to fall.
You looked over your shoulder as you began to march in the opposite direction. “I’m going back to the campsite. If you want to follow me, that is your prerogative.”
---
Rafael used the opportunity to think about what he wanted to do as he followed you back to campsite. Truth was that he did like you – a lot. He might even dare to say his feelings bordered on love. But ever since Yelina had broken his heart so many years ago, he was reticent about any kind of relationship. Certainly his line of work didn’t allow for romance and he used that to his advantage.
Then you came along. And turned his whole world upside down..
You were the newest detective after Kat Tamin. You were like a breath of much needed fresh air. You weren’t jaded like the other detectives and thought outside the box. When other detectives offered stereotypical analysis, you had a way of providing another vantage point that might not have been otherwise stated.
You were also thirteen years his junior.
Rafael worried that disclosing the relationship would make him come across some kind of old man pervert. And instead of telling you and leaning on you, he decided to push you away because it was easier to avoid than deal with feelings he wasn’t used to.
When you had gotten back to the campsite, you stormed off to where Fin and Sonny were, joining them in a card game. Your eyes met Rafael’s and you glared at him before turning to Sonny and laughing at what he said.
Rafael felt his heart sink a bit. And then he gathered what resolve he had and vowed to make things right with you. He didn’t want to risk losing you.
---
After a day of more bonding activities, you all sat around the campfire. Sonny strummed his guitar – a hobby of his – as he lead everyone through a round of Wagon Wheel.
Picking me a bouquet of dogwood flowers
And I'm a-hopin' for Raleigh, I can see my baby tonight
So rock me momma like a wagon wheel…
Finally, everyone decided to hit the sack and call it a night. You were settling into your sleeping bag, when you heard the zipper to your tent open. You turned on your flashlight and directed it to the tent opening.
“Who the fu—”
Rafael poked his head in. “Can we talk?” The light shone directly into his eyes, nearly blinding him. He blocked the light with his hand.
You sighed. “I’m going to bed. Make it quick.”
Rafael climbed into the tent and settled next to you. You set the flashlight between you, causing an eerie glow. Rafael took your hands in his and pressed kisses along your knuckles.
“Hermosa, you deserve to know the truth. What I feel for you…” Rafael sighed, shaking his head. You felt your heart thud in your chest and your stomach churned. You thought perhaps he was going to break your heart for good.
You interrupted him and began to speak, your voice shaking. “Please spare me the humiliation…”
“No! If I ever made you feel like I don’t love you. That was my fault and I’m a bad liar.” Rafael replied.
“You love me?” You asked, your voice hopeful.
“I do.” Rafael replied. He pressed a chaste kiss to your lips. “Then you stole me. And I stole you… What made you think I had any intention of ever giving you back.”
“I love you too Rafael.” You replied. You climbed over to his lap, knocking over the flashlight. You leaned over and pressed your lips against his. Rafael groaned, and opened his mouth, returning your kiss. He stretched out his leg and pulled you into his lap. His hands ran up and down your thighs, squeezing your ass as you hungrily kissed each other. His tongue danced with yours and you ground yourself against him. You could feel his cock harden. You moaned loudly as he lowered his mouth to the slope of your neck sucking on a sweet spot, causing you to grind further down. “Oh Rafael!”
Rafael slapped his hand over your mouth. “Sshhh.”
“Do you think they can hear us through the tent?” You asked.
“Yes we can.” A voice that sounded a lot like Olivia’s called out. “And here I thought we would have to worry about Rollins and Carisi.”
You and Rafael burst into laughter. “Well, I was going to suggest disclosing in the morning, but I think we were found out.” Rafael replied.
“Good. Now that they all know…come here.” You replied – your voice was filled with want. You wrapped your hand around Rafael’s neck once more and pulled him down on top of you.
