#basically!!!!

[britneyshakespeare]

I am extremely remiss over the amount of time I regarded Marianne Faithfull solely in terms of her adjacency to Mick Jagger. I rarely thought of Marianne the pop star, Marianne the actress, Marianne the drug addict, Marianne the human, only Marianne on the arm of the front man, Marianne in bed with the front man. I thought of Marianne mostly in terms of beauty – one beautiful person attached to another. I hate this especially because my initial handling of Marianne, the ways in which I perpetuated her role as nothing more than Mick Jagger’s girlfriend or schmaltzy pop star, was identical to the treatment she received from the press, the industry & the consumers – I saw her as she was packaged & I participated in her erasure. In the documentary Dreaming My Dreams, Marianne claims she felt compelled to erase herself, to become blank, in order to believably play the part of Marianne the domestic, the demure pop star or the rock & roll girlfriend. Marianne Faithfull began as an image, a fantasy, the embodiment of a masculine concoction – an angel with big tits. Marianne with her long blonde hair & sparkling eyes & wide mouth, Marianne the innocent, the schoolgirl, the virgin with the quivering voice. Marianne grew overnight into a pop star & a sex symbol. Marianne was presupposed to live & die as a construct. Marianne was meant to be blank.

—The Faulty Tabula Rasa: Marianne Faithfull, Feminine Erasure, & The State Of Being

[pcssessing]

while i hope yall read the whole bio... TL;DR for people who didn’t just yet!

bellamy is based on beauty and the beast and is in fact BOTH.

she’s from a small primarily white hick town in south louisiana and has always thought her only living family was her father.

she’s smart as FUCK and pretty much hella into nerd shit but also into weird paranormal things.

she went to LSU and has her masters in aerospace engineering and a bachelors in mechanical engineering. she worked for several years at jacobs in houston in a contract with NASA before moving back home to take care of her ill father and his boat and auto mechanic shop.

she ended up discovering on her mother’s side she has living family, specifically a great uncle who helped paid for her college though she never knew that bc her dad never told her. her mother disowned her family bc they are awful ppl but her great uncle is the head of lefevre industries and he manipulated bellamy into working and living with him by paying for her father’s growing medical bills.

her father died and then, her uncle having copd, passed away later... after bellamy secretly smothered him instead of calling for his live in nurse. it was called a natural death due to his illness and bellamy ran away from it and spent two years on the road doing the one thing she could never do: indulging in her weird love for the supernatural/paranormal. she began a vlog on her travels to various well known haunted/weird places and went viral within the year.

she was contacted by someone from lefevre who informed her that she needed to realize she had some responsibilities to deal with what she inherited. 

apparently she actually DID inherit her uncle’s share of the company, just over half compared to the rest split three ways with distant cousins. the cousins attempted to offer her a way out by buying her shares but realizing her uncle always intended to just use her to piss them off, and that her white cousins looked down on her...

she said fuck you, this is mine and you can’t have it. being that she has ACTUAL experience in engineering she has some loyalty from the board of directors and is currently dealing with her place in the company and the way she’s being treated in the mass media.

oh yeah and don’t forget: there’s some crazy shady shell corporation corruption in this company and she’s going to find out about it and have to figure out what the fuck to DO about it.

so yes she’s the beauty, from the small town where people have always thought of her as an outsider, and that continued on through her life in various places.. ranging from her place in the STEM sciences to her place in a white man/white family’s old money company.. and she’s the beast because she often has to present herself as more arrogant/confident/ready to fight than she might actually be on the inside in order to MAKE IT in these places she ends up and wants to be in.

[inziladun]

i highly recommend the Shadow of the Colossus OST even if you’ve never played the game, it’s one of the best soundtracks I’ve ever heard in my life

[sluglunch]

Art process:

Me: *drawing* this is shit Me: *gets so sick of staring at shit* well guess we’ll call this done then Me: *doesn’t look at shit for at least twelve hours bc I hate it so much* Me: *looks at it again after I’ve had a wholesome(lol) nights rest* it’s okay maybe, in ways…. but it could be better me: *comes back in 5 years* wow this is so cute why didn’t I do more of these