seen from Malaysia
seen from Malaysia
seen from Malaysia
seen from Malaysia
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seen from Malaysia
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The Batten Twins grew wonderfully beefy late in their career -- which did not stop them from wearing the skimpiest little trunks they could squeeze their asses into. I mean, how are they allowed to appear nearly-naked on television, yet nobody is censoring the sexual content, the flagrant homo-eroticism they present?!
The Batten Twins get me every time!
I think I must've seen every Batten Twin match posted on YouTube. Some of them more than ten times. So I was pleased to find a new Batten Twin match recently appear, with the twins taking on Matt Borne and the Dingo Warrior (aka the "Ultimate Warrior.")
It's a fairly short bout, meant to promote the super-human strength of the Warrior -- but damn, those Batten boys look sexy in their tight-ass white trunks. And 90 percent of the action is scripted to draw our attention to their silky speedos -- with the Battens frequently bending and spreading while the diligent cameramen capture the most breath-taking views.
Their shine ends and the power shifts to the Heel team after Matt Borne busts the Batten over his knee with the above Atomic Drop. Then the Gorilla-Pressing begins...
How much punishment can those white trunks endure??
I have never watched a Batten Twin match I didn't enjoy! Full video recently posted to YouTube.
Two photos of my favorite Twin Tag Team, from early and late in their careers. I was into them when they were lean and cute. I was still into them when they were burly and mature. Maybe I have a Twin Fetish that I never knew about, or maybe they're just the types of dudes who stay sexy at every age/size.
Twin Fetish: The Shocking Exploitation of the Identical Batten Brothers
These images are clipped from a 1980's wrestle-porn magazine article about the Batten Twins, a brother Tag Team who were not the most famous or successful performers, but who have quite a following among gay wrestling enthusiasts. (I'm sure the magazine editor was aware of that when he gave them this big spread.)
I confess I've always had man-crushes (or is it one man-crush?) on the Batten Twins with their fleshy dad-bods, reliably skimpy matching trunks, and their sexually performative antics in the ring. I've blogged about them many times over the years.
The whole identical twin thing was kinda hot, although I don't think I have a Twin Fetish. By covertly trading places in the ring, they're playing off the old urban legend where identical twins trade places during sex to experience each other's fuck buddy.
The purpose of these fluff pieces in the old wrestling magazines was to turn us on to the Eye-Candy of the Month. They'd post multiple beefcake poses and action photos of the studs in the ring, paired with glowing text and captions (using terms like: "sturdy", "gutsy", "grit", "determination") in praise of their awesomeness. They were dick-teasing us, trying to turn us on so we would tune in or buy tickets to see more of these studs in action.
They had to know when they printed this softcore gay porn that a good many of us would develop fanboy crushes as a result. Well that was my experience anyway.
One of my favorite names for a Heel Tag Team is "Dirty White Boys" -- it just sounds so nasty and naughty! Meanwhile, one of my favorite Babyface Teams to take a beating is always the sexy Batten Twins.
Here the Dirty White Boys deliver a Master Class in 2-on-1 Tag Team dominance. It's customary for the Heel team to target one body part on their Face-in-Peril, and the DWBs decide to go after Brad Batten's skull!
They bash his face into the buckles or a waiting boot, kick and punch and Forearm Smash the base of his skull, knee the side of his face, unleash Single- and Double-Headbutts -- just some cruel and violent shit!
The commentary is spectacular, adding excitement with some very colorful descriptions of the action. For example, at 3:45, we are told that the Batten Twin outside the ring can feel his twin's suffering (an old twin trope that always fascinated me and kind of turned me on.) Also, when Brad is tossed out of the ring, we are informed that his head struck the riser under the desk area, just so we know how badly he's hurt.
The Battens eat up all this abuse with a spoon, each taking a turn acting utterly ragdolled and helpless -- I just loved them!
I admit I didn't give the Battens much hope in this edited version of the match -- I'm sadistic that way. So the full video was recently posted to YouTube if you want to check it out.
