bobbie sits, trying to calm her nerves to no avail. it’s not like the first time she’s gotten on a plane, and it’s not the first time she’s been away from her daughter. american songbook is her dream, and she knows how lucky she is to be a part of it. but there is a part of her that wants, above anything else, to be home, to be with family. a couple of producers had warned her that visiting home might make her homesickness even worse, and they’d been right. that said, it was more than worth it. even though her heart aches to be leaving again, bobbie needed to see june carter again, even if it was just for a few days. her daughter lights up her world, and today in particular, the guilt tugs at her heart strings. last night, she’d even had a dream that left her feeling alone and frightened and for whatever reason, all her nerves were beginning to tell her to do anything but get on that airplane. what if something happened when she left. what if her baby girl stopped recognizing her? what if she missed something important, really important?
as the thought began to overwhelm her, she hung her head and squeezed her eyes, trying to clear her mind. she couldn’t be a blubbering mess when she boarded: people would be worried, and drawing attention to herself would only make it worse. people judged her enough for being such a young mother, but one that was leaving her child behind to pursue... what? fame? she shook her head, curls tossing back and forth between white knuckles. her feet fidget nervously in her boots and she can feel her heartbeat quickening, powerless to stop it.