#being excluded

[tae-shimura-is-my-wife]

So... i made some fanart!

It's yorozuya family x Spy x Family! I still haven't watched yet, but from i've heard, i instantely thought of them! Especially a adopted little girl with two hair acessories 😆

I didn't finished yet, but since i'm not very good at painting, i prefer to post this version here, but if the painting turn out good, i will post it here too!

[evemaru]

ok so all my irl friends are out bowling together,,,,,,, literally every single one,,,,,,,,,,,, and i wasnt invited,,,,,,,,,,,,,, hhahaha its not like that dangerously lowers my self esteem down to -200 but i guess i should have seen this coming people hate being around me im a fucking loser whos bad at socializing and a fucking bully that make people feel bad about themselves when i should be helping them instead but i stupidly put my feelings first and that hurts other people

am i a toxic person? is it because i put my feelings in front of theirs once? am i just not fun to be around? as a person who survives solely off the validation that they arent hated all the time this is mentally tearing me apart

lesson to be learned: never EVER put my feelings first. cater to my friends and make sure theyre okay before i take time for myself.

[deepwatersrunwild]

Unfortunately being reminded of why I’m getting super annoyed with (some of) my house mates

Queue a super long snapchat story from last night of them touring some bars in London, having a sleepover etc (wasn't even invited but I didn’t have a clue this was going to happen anyways so... I wasn't too fussed, little upset though). So I message the other house mate (who didn’t pop up in the snapchats) and asked if she knew about it; 

She said they mentioned it last minute so we wouldn't have made it (she lives in a different city to us, so no shit would she not be free). But I didn’t even know this was a thing? So then she was like ohhh they mentioned it ages ago so maybe they just wanted it to be them two. But..... They mentioned it to her last minute??? “No I just replied to their Snapchat”. Right.... Sure you did.... -_-

Fucks sake, I know when I’m being excluded and this hasn't been the first time it’s happened. When I came back from Italy I found out they had gone out MULTIPLE times to the new bars we all wanted to visit. (I was really upset actually because I was looking forward to it). Which I still haven’t gone to/been invited to go out to, so this on top of that is just fucking ridiculous.

The reason why it’s ridiculous is because if I even suggested anything like that (going out to somewhere we all want to go for the first time and one of the girls wasn’t around), the others would make me wait till everyone was free!

On top of which when I invite them to my stuff they’re always like “Oh... yeah... I can’t really afford it right now... blah blah”, but then will turn around and go to one of the others events which is around the same price?

You know what don’t get me started on some of the crap that’s happened it really upsets me and it makes me sad because were supposed to be friends.

Anyone else have similar experiences? 

[loneliness-like-a-heartbeat]

I hate group projects. And in a class I take with my friends we have on. There are four of us and you can work in groups of two or three. Silly me thinking we'd go two and two and work together (since groups can work together, you just have to submit it as a duo or trio). I got text tonight from one of my friends saying that they decided they were just going to work together as a group of three. But i shouldn't worry, just sign up online with a random group. 

I just think that's a really shitty thing to do, especially from a "friend".

They probably think I'm not smart enough to be in their group or I'll mess it up. Or it they just don't want to be my friend anymore and this is their way of telling me. 

It makes me so nervous to just think about joining a group of strangers. I'll probably be the least smart one in that group too.

And now I have to go to class tomorrow (since i have three other classes with all of them) and act like I'm fine and it doesn't bother me at all, event though they probably don't want me there anyway.

I don't know why I'm posting this. It sounds so whiny. Its just something I'm always terrified of is that my "friends" actually hate me and don't want me around and this is confirming that for me. Or I'm being stupid But I think I'm right

I miss my friends. My real friends, who I don't text or talk to enough. I'm a bad friend to. So who am I to judge.

[opia-m]

Ok I know I'm not the nicest person. I won't deny it. But the thing that really bothers me is when someone is excluded, whether it be at a party, in a school project, in a conversation, anything. We all know how it feels, and I know for a fact that none of you like it. It's still bullying, even if you're not giving direct insults. It's one thing for the person to insist on not joining, it's another for you to purposely ignore them and leave them out when they clearly want to be involved and make them feel like everyone's against them. I see it happen all the time and it makes me want to smack people.