200 belch/henry 😁
200. "i’m doing this to protect you.”
“That’s it? Just like that?” Belch shook his head, not quite believing what was going on. After three months, Henry was just going to end it, with no believable reason whatsoever?
“Yeah, asshole, just like that,” Henry told him, fiddling with his bracelet. He didn’t like this anymore than Belch did, but it had to be done. If he didn’t end it, who knew what could happen to Belch, and he couldn’t be responsible for him getting hurt. He couldn’t bear it if he was the reason something happened to him.
“Why?” He’d asked the question at least three times by now, and all he’d gotten was a shrug and a half-assed excuse that didn’t make sense at all. “And don’t bullshit me, Henry. I deserve better than that, don’t you think?”
“I don’t- Look, just let it go and get out, okay? It’s better this way.” It really was. Belch could move on and find someone better, someone less violent, less broken. Someone who’s father wouldn’t murder him if they got caught.
“Better? Better for who, Henry?” Belch demanded. How could it be better? Fuck, couldn’t Henry see how much he cared about him? How he’d do anything for him? It wasn’t better, it was the worst thing he could imagine. He didn’t want to break up, and he didn’t want Henry’s bullshit excuses as to why.
“For you, okay? It’s better for you, so you won’t get hurt!” Henry snapped. Belch shouldn’t be questioning him. It wasn’t like he actually cared. Henry was just a warm body to him, to anyone, and he was okay with that. Love wasn’t something he deserved, he wasn’t good enough for that, and it had been proven to him time and time again.
“No, it’s fucking not better for me! And how am I going to get hurt? You gonna hurt me?” Belch asked, crossing his arms. “Oh, fuck, you’ve found someone else, haven’t you?”
“What? No! God, Bel, it’s not that, okay?” It could never be that. There was no one Henry cared about more. And that was why he was doing this. It was better, safer, for Belch this way. Even if it meant losing him, even if it meant breaking his own heart which, until now, he hadn’t thought was possible.
“Than what is it? Tell me, Hen. I want to know why you’re doing this. Tell me, and then I’ll leave.” He couldn't quite believe it was even happening, but if Henry would just tell him why, then maybe he could get over it. Maybe.
“For fuck’s sake. I’m doing this to protect you! Okay? Just, I’m doing it so you won’t get hurt!” Henry shouted. Belch could never make things easy for him. He was always asking Henry to explain himself, always wanting to know his reasons behind things, always asking for his thoughts. He acted like Henry was somehow a real person, like he was worth something, like he actually mattered to him, but that couldn’t be true. Henry was just reading to much into it. He was desperate for affection so he was taking everything Belch did as some sign that he actually cared about him. But he couldn't believe he did. If he did, then that made this harder than it should be.
“Protect me from what? What do I need protection from? Some killer clown gonna come up from the sewers and fuck me up for loving you?”
For loving you. That had to be fake. Belch couldn’t love him. No one did. That was just how it was. But still, Henry softened at the words, the fight leaving him and the pain of what was happening setting in.
“No, Bel. From my dad, okay? If he finds out about us, then he’ll kill you.” And then Henry, but that didn’t matter half as much. And his dad was already suspicious that he was with someone. He didn’t need him poking around and finding out about Belch. He’d never tolerate his son being a fucking fag. He’d kill them both.
“Your dad? Does he know about us?” Belch’s anger turned to concern. If Henry’s dad knew, he’d hurt Henry, worse than he had before.
“No, not yet. But he’s getting suspicious and it’s only a matter of time, and then he’ll kill us both.”
“And that’s why you’re leaving me? Because of your old man?” Belch asked, understanding finally.
“Don’t you fucking get it? He’ll kill you, Bel! And he’ll get away with it!” He was a cop, he could do whatever he wanted and get away with it. It was just how things worked.
“I’m not scared of him, Henry. He can’t hurt me. If he finds out, I’ll kick his ass.”
Henry laughed, shaking his head. “You can’t do that.”
“I can, actually. Hell, the only reason I haven’t yet is because II’m afraid he’ll take it out on you. Patrick and I have a plan, actually, of how to get rid of him. No one will ever find him. He’ll just go missing,” Belch told him.
“That’s insane. You’re fucking insane if you think you can do that.” Henry knew better. Nobody could get rid of his dad.
Belch sighed, knowing Henry was right. “How about this? We get Gretta to cover for us. You pretend to date her and he’ll never know about us. There’s only two more years til we graduate, then we’re gone. Until then, Gretta can be our cover.”
Henry furrowed his brow, “That’ll never work. She’d never do that for me.”
“She’ll do it for herself, though.”
“Why would she need a cover?”
“God, you’re so fucking oblivious. She’s gay as all hell, Henry. You can be her cover and she’ll be yours. Then you’re both free to do whatever you want with whoever you want,” Belch explained.
“Think it’ll work?” Henry asked, feeling a little bit hopeful. If she’d do it, then he could stay with Belch.
“Yeah, I know it will.” Belch stepped closer to Henry and took hold of his hand. “It’ll be okay, alright? Your dad will never find out about us. You’re safe, I’m safe, we can stay together.”
“You sure you even want to? I mean, it’s not like I’m worth the trouble,” Henry scoffed. He wasn’t. Belch should just quit while he was ahead and find someone else.
“Of course you are. Don’t be such a dumbass. Come here,” Belch pulled him closer. “I will keep you safe, okay? Because I love you.”
Henry’s breath caught in his throat. Belch had never said that before. He couldn’t quite believe it, but nonetheless, he pulled Belch down into a kiss. He couldn’t say it back, but he could do his best to show it. If Belch loved him, then he knew he’d be safe, even if he didn’t understand why Belch thought he was worth it.
“Honestly, fuck your dad. He’s a prick and we should just kill him.”
Henry snorted. If it were that easy, he would have done it years ago. “You’re nuts.”
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