*Warning: Smut (hand jobs, blow jobs, fingering, rimming, orgasms, drug reference, mentions of alcohol, implied consent)
Authors note: Greeting ya'll, I am so excited to be publishing this chapter. This one takes me into a category that I have never tried writing before. I am, for lack of a better term, intimacy challenge. So if, you have any comments or helpful advice for future chapter, please let me know. In honor of mt birthday and the start of the Arirang tour, I hope you all enjoy this chapter. Also, if anyone is going to Tampa Day 1, maybe we can say HI! I'll also be posting this on AO3 under the same name. Like, comment, and enjoy!
Yoongi shifted uncomfortably in the armchair that they had dragged to the edge of the bed. Under normal circumstances, he would be thrilled to be dragged into their playroom by one of his boys. Hell, it hadn’t even been the first time since he was released from the hospital that one of them had cornered him somewhere in the Magic Shop and tried to fuck his brains out. He wouldn’t deny liking the sudden attention. Tension and longing had always grown when one of them had been away for a time. Though as he reflected of the last few weeks, there were three main reasons for the sudden increase in the sexual need. For one, the whole mess with Choi has really wired them all. It made them face their least favorite subject: the possibility of losing one of their own. And now, the others needed to constantly touch him, shower him with love and affection, and not let him out of their sight for a moment. He had woken up on a few occasions with one of his boys sneaking into his bed, just to press their ear to his chest and listen to his heartbeat, reassuring themselves that he was really back and not going to die. On his first day back, Hoseok had been the first to show him how much he missed him. They hadn’t even made it out of the eyes of the rest of the company when Yoongi found himself being showered with soft words and promises that would make even the strongest man weak. Once the door to his room was shut, Hoseok shoved him onto his bed and sucked the breath from his lungs before trying to suck his soul from his cock. He knew the younger’s original motive had been to keep him in bed, but the desire to be reminded of the whimpers and gasp that would have disappeared drove him to push those limits. Due to the drugs in his system, Yoongi could do little more than just lay there and let the sensation wash over him like water escaping from a broken dam. Hoseok loved to tease; he’d switch from light stroking to hard, from breathy kisses up the shaft to swallowing Yoongi’s cock down and moving back up with the faintest brush of teeth. And just when he felt the muscles in Yoongi’s thighs start to shake, hear the elder’s breath hitch, and the moaning start to turn towards breathy whines, the cheeky bastard would pin his hips to the mattress and take his lips in his to swallow those begging protest until the fire started to smolder. Then he would start it all over again. After the fourth time he had been brought to edge only to be ripped back, he was starting to hate the smug smirk on Hoseok’s lips. He even had the nerve to say ‘I can’t wait for you to get better so you can make me pay for this.’ Hobi had kept him on the edge of release for so long that when the younger swirled his tongue over Yoongi’s overly sensitive tip and swallowed him down that silky throat, his brain shut down. Even his dreams were making plans of revenge against the younger, with ropes and cuffs that he knew the other would wish for.
Jin had been a favorite. His hyung had always been their doctor in situations like this, so having to take a back seat had been tough. To make up for it, Jin had busied himself with preparing nutritious meals to help him heal faster and researching different herb remedies and techniques to improve his mobility. But each time Jin would look at him, there was a look that Yoongi didn’t like. Jin was always the ‘mother-hen’ type, but when he had no more control on the situation, he felt like he was almost useless. He hadn’t been there to oversee the surgeries or set forth the recovery details. He hadn’t been the one to see how deep the wounds were, what damage was fixed, no matter how qualified the hospital staff was. Jin was left in the dark and that was not a place he enjoyed being when it came to his boys. He had to trust the work of someone who knew anatomy but not the way he knew it. Until Yoongi was completely healed, there was only so much he could do. Therefore, he was a more delicate with them and fused over every little thing like they were some ancient pieces of artwork that would crumble if he breathed wrong in their direction. Anything more than a light brush of his lips again his head was completely off the table. And that only made Yoongi’s only hyung even more desirable, if only to show him how much he was grateful for his administrations and effort.
They had been in Jin’s lab when Yoongi finally got fed up of that look in Jin’s eyes as he inspected the stiches in the younger’s shoulder. Jin had insisted that you use the medical area in his lab when inspecting Yoongi’s wounds and redressing them, having all the supplies and a sterilized area. He had been hovering when you had removed the bandages from Yoongi’s side. That had healed the fastest, now a littering of discolored bruising and slight scarring. He watched intently as you had inspected along his dongsaeng’s ribs, watching for any sign of pain or flinch. Despite your positive outlook on his progress, it did little to wipe that look of helplessness that Yoongi hated seeing. He eyed his hyung very deliberately when you started unwrapping his shoulder to inspect the stitches. Jin would, normally, push anyone out of the way and do it himself, barking orders and taking full control. But you were a fresh territory, and he was resigned to clenching his hands as you ran his boy through some rehab exercises to evaluate his mobility. It was only when you had asked for a roll of new bandages that Jin’s patience had seem to run out. With a practiced smile, he insisted he could manage the rest, gesturing to a new product that was in the final trail stages that he wished to apply that would improve scar healing. Once you had left, escorted back to the main house by Jin’s assistant and leaving the two of them alone, Yoongi had hoped that would give him the opportunity to ease his hyung’s concern and talk him into some alone time that they could both benefit from. But Jin was focused on doing something else with his hands that only made Yoongi want him even more than before.
With every brush of the elder’s fingertips against Yoongi’s pale skin set his nerves a flame. He could feel his breath against his skin as he leaned closer to do his own inspection of his wounds. When Jin’s soft hands smoothed across his ribs, it sent shivers down his spine and straight to his cock. It had been so long since he had had some alone time with his only hyung, normally joined by one of the others. And he needed it now more than ever. They both could. But he knew Jin would be worried about hurting him more, especially since he was forced to take a backseat in the medical care. He was aching for him. But more than that, he was aching to show him how much he needed his hyung and how good he could make him feel. Yoongi didn’t care if Jin fucked him stupid or fucked himself on Yoongi’s cock, he just needed to feel him. By the time Jin had finished rewrapping his shoulder, he was throbbing. His hyung must have noticed, simply by the amused look in those eyes. Normally not one to beg, Yoongi was prepared to employ any means that would make his hyung break. But living with five younger men who were much better at pouty lips and bedroom eyes than he only brought a bemused scoff at his attempts.
“My poor Yoongi-yah,” Jin soothed, hand coming up to cup the younger’s cheek, “don’t give me that look. You are still healing. And I don’t want to hurt you, Love.”
“But I am hurting now without you. See,” he dragged his hyung’s hand down his body to his aching erection, not even bothering to hold back the moan that escaped at the added pressure that felt so good. Begging it was. “Hyungie, please. I’m not made of glass. I need you so bad, can’t you feel how much? All for you. I just…please, Hyungie. I’ll do whatever you want, just please touch me, fuck me, use me. Anything. I just need you so bad. I’ll be good, I promise. I won’t even move if you tell me to. You can fuck me stupid, or ride my cock the way you like, and I’ll lay there and let you use me.”
“And let me do all the work?” Jin removed his hand, grabbed his discarded medical kit, and turned his back to his begging partner. Yoongi sat there, practically pulsating with want and frustration. He let out a frustrated growl, only to be caught off guard by plush lips pressed against his, biting and licking for entrance, as skilled hands pushed him further back onto the table. “So dramatic,” Jin taunted as he straddled Yoongi’s hip and caged him in, his own want evident as their bodied rocked against each other’s.
Then, there was Namjoon. The two of them had formed a close bond over their shared trauma at the hands of the Royals. So, it was fairly obvious to Yoongi that Namjoon was harboring some guilt over his injuries that only a leader could. Even though he could not have foreseen the outcome, he was still the one who sent them into the lion’s den. No matter how smart Joon was, there was no way he could have calculated every little thing. It was a well-known fact within Bangtan that when the leader fell into this self-inflicted guilt pit, it was best to let him process all the information. Confronting him directly would only make him feel worse. Namjoon just needed to look at and analyze everything that had happened, try to see if any other option would have ended in a different scenario. Only then could he be more open to believing that he wasn’t to blame. Knowing this, Yoongi didn’t push.
One evening, when it was just the seven of them for the evening, the Maknae line demanded a movie night. No exceptions. Just all of them in one room, enjoying the company. Namjoon had settled on the far end of the large sofa, apart from the others and absentmindedly fidgeting with his sleeves. By this point, Yoongi had been home for a few days, and added with his time in the hospital, he determined that it was enough time for him to start hinting that he was missing Namjoon and showing how he didn’t want the distance he was employing. It was a subtle way to show that he didn’t harbor any blame. He bypassed his normal spot and made his way to stand in front of his leader. The white blond snapped out of his thoughts but, before he could protest or question, Yoongi seated himself between those muscular thighs, back pressed against the broader chest, and legs stretched out across the ottoman. As he wiggled and shifted to get comfortable, he identified with his more submissive nickname: Kitten. Namjoon seemed to short circuit; his body went rigid- and not in the fun way Yoongi wanted- hands held up and away like he was afraid his clumsy nature would hurt his hyung. But ever-so-slowly, Joon seemed to accept what Yoongi had done and relaxed. Soon, Yoongi felt a familiar hand ease around his arm sling and rest against his middle, holding him close. The elder smiled; it was a small victory but a good start back to normalcy. As the movie progressed, Namjoon rested his chin against the other’s shoulder, lips ghosting across the exposed skin of his neck and collar bone. Yoongi knew Joon wouldn’t end up railing him in front of the other, not that that exact thing hadn’t happened before. Little steps, he reminded himself, smiling at the way Namjoon’s fingers started intertwining with those on his injured hand, touch so gentle but so meaningful. And this was better than sex.
At least at the time.
Two days prior to being dragged into his current predicament, and a day after their new house guest had recovered from her migraine, was when the bindings and stitches were to be removed. The two of you were set up on a bench in the stretching area of the gym. As you set the sterile, packaged instruments within reach, you made some feisty comment about wanting to be in a more clinical environment for such a procedure. But Yoongi insisted that staying at the Magic Shop was safer than transporting to a clinic or Mercy. And that he wasn’t waiting to get to Jin’s lab to finally be rid of those damn stitches. Then, he made a mocking comeback that the gym had been cleaned recently, which resulted in a playful slap with a surgical glove. The two of you had become friendly since the very first meeting, like you were old friends throwing sarcastic comments at each other, rolling eyes, and scrunching noses back and forth. And that faired to be a great distraction when you started to take out the first stitches.
This was about the time that Namjoon walked into the area, not realizing that you both were in there. He froze in the doorway and Yoongi could the guilt return to those deep eyes. But you, having been with them for a short while, didn’t recognize the shift in his posture. You smiled and waved him over. You assumed he was there for moral support and started explaining the process as you removed another stitch. But Namjoon wasn’t retaining anything you said, eyes studying the still lingering marks and bruises across Yoongi’s pale skin. With every slight flitch or hiss that Yoongi made as you disinfected the area and redressed it, it mirrored through Namjoon. When you asked if he would like to help with some physical therapy, he was quick to decline. He made some comment about him being clumsy and not wanting to hurt his hyung. Too bad Yoongi was hoping for a little roughness.
Later that evening, his wish came true. Yoongi had been working in the Genius Lab going over some reports and logs; Jin still had him on desk work for a few more days. He didn’t even need to look up when he heard feet shuffling or the door open. He had always been able to distinguish Joon’s presence from the others. A large hand clamped down on the back of his chair and pulled Yoongi away from his desk. It was, then, he became aware of a strong smell of whiskey that came from the other; it was a particular aged brand that Yoongi had gifted Namjoon for his birthday. It would appear that the ‘always down to fuck’ leader needed some liquid courage to come for him. But if that’s what got him over his problems and got Yoongi fucked against his consol, who was he to worry about it?. He was spun around, and Joon’s hands threaded through his hyung’s dyed lock, seizing and yanking his head back with a welcoming roughness that his body begged for. A wanton moan escaped Yoongi’s lips as he waited for teeth and tongue to attack the exposed skin of his throat.
But nothing came. He opened his eyes to be met with a sobering sight. Namjoon looked like he was struggling with so much. Drowning himself with whiskey had taken all those hidden issues and emotions and forced them to the surface. There was this conflicting air about him; to just ignore everything and fuck until he couldn’t think about anything else, and the desire to confront this problem that he had settled himself in. The fingers twisted in his hair were shaking, wanting Yoongi to really see his struggles, to help him. Those deep eyes were shining and red- not just from the alcohol. They were screaming all those emotions he was agonizing over. I’m so sorry! Please forgive me! Don’t leave me. Don’t hate me.
Yoongi soften- in his face only- and pulled Namjoon down until the taller was kneeling between his legs, their foreheads were pressed together, until they were nose to nose, breathing in each other’s presence. “Don’t do that,’ he soothed, “Don’t listen to that fear. I’m right here. It takes so much more to take me down. Feel my breath, hear my voice? I’m not going away where. Don’t hold that in anymore.” Yoongi brushed the stray tear that had started to fall with the pad of his thumb. “Talk to me, Joonie. You can’t hold that in anymore.”
“I should have known,” came the shaky response. “I should have anticipated him being there. Sent extra Army there to help. I know what they could do. And I just sent you in there like a normal drop.”
“We couldn’t have been sure that he would have been there. Even knowing what we know, it’s been so long since he’s been active, no one could have anticipated him. You’re not psychic, Namjoon. Even if you anticipated every single step, he still would have been the wild card. You did what any of us would have done. Having more Army may have helped but it could have also got in the way or drawn more attention. Who could say if that would happened. We just have to take this and grow with it like we’ve always done. You had so many exits planned out that day. You planned the meeting point if we got separated. You spent the time with Taehyung plotting out all the exits. It was your idea to hide our guns on the hostage. You protected us to the best you could. Knowing the outcome, I wouldn’t change anything if it meant getting the others back to you safe.”
Joon’s fingers tightened in the dyed orange hair. “But we can’t lose you too. We need you, I need you. We are seven, always and forever. When you didn’t come home or answer your phone, all these scenarios kept playing out in my head. I should have been there for you. And when I finally saw you, it got so real that we almost lost you. Because I sent you in there. And it would have been my fault. And I couldn’t handle that.”
“I know, but I’m right here. I’m here with you now. I will never willingly leave you. Any of you. And I would never stop fighting to get back to you. Even if I didn’t make it back, it was not because of you. It would come down to my decision and the enemy. But never because of you. You know that, right? We’ve been through so much together, and never would I put the blame on you. We can talk more when you need but I need you to hear me when I say this; there is nothing that would make me hate you. All this guilt is what separates you from the monster that Choi is. You feel too much, and that is why you are the person you are. So, please, don’t blame yourself for things you can’t change or control. Don’t let those dark thoughts overtake you.”
“I’m so sorry, Hyung. So, so sorry.”
“There is nothing to forgive, Kim Namjoon.” Yoongi closed the distance between them to place a chaste kiss in those plump lips. Nothing sexual, just to drive the point home through. Joon finally let go of Yoongi’s hair and wrapped his arms around his middle in a comforting embrace, finally letting go. They stayed like that for several long moments until the tears finally stilled. Yoongi let his fingers trace little comforting patterned across the loosening muscles along Namjoon’s body, something he found most of his boys enjoyed when they were upset. When the younger’s breathing went back to normal and he used his larger hands to wipe the residual wetness from those dimpled cheeks, Yoongi finally broke the tension. “Since when did you become the sappy drunk? Taking Hoseok title?”
The smile he loved seeing spread across those kissable lips. “Sorry, Hyung. That wasn’t how I expected that to go.”
“Oh yeah? How about you show me how sorry you really are,” Yooni challenged.
And with that, the flood gates opened; Namjoon surged forward and pressed his lips to the others, tongue begging for entrance that was willfully given. Normally, Yoongi would fight for dominance. But he was content with releasing control and letting Namjoon do whatever he needed. And to be honest, they hadn’t been in this dynamic in a long time, so that made every touch electric. Joon’s hand smoothed over Yoongi’s body possessively, one stroking his thigh while the other slipped under his shirt. He loved the light scratches the leader left on his pale skin. He needed more, so much more. He tried to moan out that simple syllable, but Joon swallowed it. While Yoongi was content with being the submissive this round, that didn’t mean he couldn’t be a little bratty. He twisted his hands in the other’s white hair and bit down on Joon’s bottom lip, earning him that deepest growl that shot right to his cock. Before he could process what was happening, Namjoon’s hands secured their hold under his thigh and around his waist. He stood up, pulling Yoongi up with him. A loud, needy moan echoed in the room as his hardening arousal pressed against Namjoon’s toned body.
Then, they were moving. Yoongi really didn’t care where as long as it ended with Joon’s throbbing cock rocking deep into him. The desire only heightened the more the younger kissed him and rocked up into him as he walked. Suddenly, Yoongi was dropped on to the soft mattress covered in silk sheets. The Playroom. Joon pushed off the bed and crossed to lock the door. “I gonna take my time with you tonight,” he said as he returned, pulling his sweatshirt off, letting Yoongi’s hungry eyes devour every inch of Joon’s toned chest. “Just us tonight. The others can watch later.” He trailed his fingers up under his hyung’s shirt, nails leaving goosebumps as it pushed the fabric up and away from that pale skin that begged to be marked. Yoongi let his head fall back, showing off the column of his throat to the security camera in the corner of the room. Oh yes, someone is gonna enjoy the view, if they weren’t already. Joon’s hand cradled his head and brought their lips back together, rocking their hips together in a steady rhythm. It was enough to build towards the edge, but not enough to push Yoongi over it. He was already so turned on that it wasn’t long before he was panting against those plush lips and trying to get more. By the time Joon started working down his hyung’s pants, Yoongi’s head was swimming. All he could focus on was his throbbing cock and how slow Namjoon was dragging the fabric across his skin. He should have known by that alone that Joon was set on torturing him. But when the younger settled between his parted legs and started sucking a deep bruise on his inner thigh, completely ignoring his weeping cock, he knew he was going to be completely fucked out of his mind.
His whines and whimpers did nothing to speed things along. When he tried to arch his hips towards some kind of relief, Namjoon pinned him with one hand to his lower stomach. Only once Namjoon was satisfied with the mark left on those pale legs, did he finally rise up to cage Yoongi against the mattress. No words said, he just leaned down and kissed the corner of his mouth before reaching out to somewhere on the mattress. Namjoon took in the breathtaking sight before him as he popped the cap off the lube bottle: his composed Hyung brought to the edge of lust, hair mused and fan out amongst the dark silk, breath coming in quick gasp to try and keep from falling to deep, pale skin on full display and shivering with anticipation and want. It was a good thing that there were cameras in the playroom, because Joon wanted to have this image of Yoongi forever.
He jolted back to reality when slick fingers rub against his entrance, two sinking into the tight heat. He, normally, wasn’t the most vocal, leaving that honor to Jimin or Namjoon (when he was in the submissive mood). But when Joon’s lips sealed around his nipple and sucked, Yoongi could hold back the begging moans or the dramatic arch of his back. Joon hooked his arm under Yoongi’s back, keeping that angle that only aided him in nudging that spot that sent sparks flying across the other’s vision. Now, Yoongi was definitely not sensitive there as Jungkook, but Joon had every nerve set on fire that everything brush on his tongue or brush of his fingers brought him closer and closer to cumming untouched. A third finger was pushed in, and the burn felt so good. His brain wasn’t working anymore, only focusing on the onslaught of sensations building and building. He could feel Joon smile around the hardened nub as Yoongi’s voice cracked and caught with each new intense moan. He all but screamed when Namjoon finally hit that spot hard while biting down on his nipple, the combined pleasure sending him over the edge and cumming between their bodies. But Joon didn’t stop moving, working him through it and making it last just enough to hurt.
“You’re so beautiful, Hyung,” he whispered against the other’s panting lips. “So good for me. Always so good. But we are far from done here.” He dragged his fingers through the mess of Yoongi’s orgasm and rubbing it on his own throbbing cock. “I’m going to fuck you so good. And you can cum as much as you want. But I am not stopping until we are both completely spent.”
******
The sound of a door shutting brought Yoongi from his musings and back to the scene in front of him. Taehyung was devouring Jimin’s lips as he maneuvered the two of them to the bed next to Yoongi. Which brought Yoongi to reason number two of their heightened sex drive.
Jimin.
Taehyung had cornered Yoongi after returning from dropping you off at your apartment apparently worked up and in no mood to be denied. Though, denying Taehyung anything was next to impossible for Yoongi. It had been the second youngest that Yoongi found in his bed the most, the one who hugged him the most. So, when he took Yoongi’s hands and pulled him into the Playroom, sat him in the armchair, and told him to wait, he knew his hyung would obey. Watching the two soulmates kiss was like watching a starving man devour his first meal. They must have already been at it in the hall before coming back to the Playroom because Jimin’s shirt was already unbuttoned and he was breathless when Taehyung finally pushed him on the mattress. Tae hair was messier than before and he looked hungry. He climbed on top of the mattress, pushing Jimin farther back until they were in the best view for Yoongi to see every quivering muscle. Watching the two of them was a better aphrodisiac than anything else, hearing their voice harmonize in a lustful symphony that was undeniable. Which made Yoongi wonder if he had been fucked too much as he wasn’t itching to jump into the fray with them, content with just watching them enjoy themselves. Taehyung pinned Jimin’s wrist high above his head and smiled against the other’s lips when he obediently stayed there. He kissed down the smooth neck and to his chest. There, he made quick work pinching and sucking on those already erect nipples. Jimin held nothing back, encouraging Tae with melodic moans of praises and pleas. But Tae seemed bent on torture as he drew off with a ‘pop’ and blew cold air on it, causing Jimin to arch back dangerously and curse. Arching back as far as he was gave Yoogni the best view of the fuck-out face he loved seeing, yet he still didn’t move from his spot, still content with just watching, mind a buzz with other things.
Jimin’s eyes fluttered open to see his beautiful hyung, smile faltering slightly when he saw the way he just sat there. He reached his hand out for Yoongi, needing his touch. Which Yoongi gladly gave, bringing that hand up, kissing his skin, and leaning his cheek into his palm. Jimin grabbed Tae with his other hand, bringing the other boy back to his lips, silently communicating in a way that only they understood. Yoongi watched as Taehyung licked deep into his soulmate’s mouth before drawing back on his knees to pull his shirt off and allow Jimin enough room to roll onto his knees to face their hyung. He leaned forward and brought his plump lips to Yoongi, softly at first to cherish that softness that only he could possess. Then, lips opened, begging for the elder to claim his mouth. And Yoongi would never deny his baby anything. Taehyung smirked at the sight before him, his own desires spiking higher; his long fingers scrapped through his hyung’s orange hair while the other pulled the shirt from Jimin’s body, biting down where his soul mate’s neck met his shoulders. Jimin broke his kiss to let out a shivering moan, getting overwhelmed by everything around him. He felt so good, so loved, so wanted in this moment. Except by his hyung, who was still sitting on the sideline.
“Hyung,” he said between pants and gasps as Taehyung’s hands and mouth continued to roam. “When we brought you in here, it was to be a participant, not a spectator.”
“I’m participating. But you’re enjoying yourself so much, who am I to ruin it?”
“Never ruin, only add- Fuck, Tae,” Jimin moaned out as Taehyung fingers disappeared below the open waistband on his pants. He took a few breaths to keep his mind on the conversation at hand, panting hard. God, he was so sexy this way. “Hyung please. I need you so much.”
“Already, baby? Tae barely done anything.” Yoongi reach out and took hold of Jimin’s chin, forcing the blond to look at him directly. He leaned closer to the younger, studied. Even with his blue eyes blown out wide with lust, Yoongi could see the rosy pink ring around the limbus that bled into the iris. That would make sense, but hadn’t he already received his medication? Yoongi was sure that he had seen evidence of them taking care of Jimin last night. After his dosage, Taehyung and Jungkook had taken Jimin to MooMoo, a club owned by the Mama Gang. Since the resurgence of U4-1A, Bangtan had come to an agreement with many gangs to help distribute U4-1C to those who needed it. While Jin’s formula wasn’t a complete cure, it was a big help in edging out the more dangerous side effects of the original- death. With continual usage, it could help the community get back to some sort of normalcy. At least until Jin was able to crack the code and find the actual antidote to eradicate the drug.
MooMoo ended up being a safe haven for those like Jimin who found bliss in drinks, thumping bass music, and getting lost in the feeling just the right combination to take the edge off. And a full, dimly lit club was a good place to hide it from the critical public. Their partnership with Solar and her girls had been going strong for four years, when Jin’s new generation of drug proved to help decrease the crippling addiction and allow ways other than forced intercourse to satisfy the effects. All Bangtan asked was for a safe, protective space where they could help their member through a tough time once every month. For their own supply to assist others who were brought to the club, they would provide heavy security, pink glow lights that hid the eyes colors, employees who knew how to help hide what was really happening, whatever they needed.
Taehyung had sent videos and pictures of their evening to the Bangtan group chat. One was of them taking shots under a pink glow of the bar, the rosy color of Jimin’s eyes disguised to all who didn’t know. Another was of Taehyung taking a big swig from a bottle before locking his lips against Jimin’s and forcing the alcohol down the other’s throat. Jimin had pulled back, laughing and clearly drunk, pulling the taller one towards the dance floor. But the last video Taehyung had sent over was definitely going into everyone’s jack off folders. The bass was booming, dance floor glowing with colors and thick smoke from the fog machines. Tae was weaving through the throngs of people towards and elevated platform where Jimin was swinging around on a pole, grinding and twisting like he was born to entertain. His face was flushed with alcohol and euphoric energy coursing through his veins. Suddenly, Jungkook climbed up and pinned Jimin’s arms above his head against the pole. The two of them ground against each other in time with the pounding club music. A sensual dance that in reality was the two of them dry humping each other with a frenzied need. They couldn’t hear anything over the music, but the way that Jimin threw his head back, they could all use their imagination to know what his screams sounded like.
But that brought the question to Yoongi’s mind; a night of drinking and clubbing was normally enough to work U4-1C out of Jimin’s system until his next dosage. And with Jungkook all but fucking him on the dancefloor, he shouldn’t be like this still. Could this be a new symptom? No, more likely, it was his body’s reaction to being off his routine. Ahh, that made more sense.
Jimin pulled his face from Yoongi’s grasp. “It’s not from that.”
“Oh baby, you shouldn’t lie to me. You know I won’t give you anything if you are not honest. You should have known that skipping all those days was going to bite you in the ass. And not in the fun way. You’ve been taking this long enough to know that staying on the routine is the best thing. And when you do get to push it back, it’s one day at a time, not a week.”
“Yeah, been on this shit for over six years,” he panted, fingers tightening in the sheets as he tried to keep his focus under Taehyung’s administrations.
Yoongi tsked. “I know you are not bad-mouthing Jin-hyung work. Who knows where’d you be if he hadn’t gotten this far. He’s working so hard for you, baby. The least you can do is not keep taking steps backwards because you want to force it. If you want to continue living as normal as you can, you better start listening to him.”
“I know. I get it. I just thought I was ready. And with everything going on with you and- Shit, Taehyungie, please- I just lost focus. I’m just sick of this. The aches, the nausea, the fucking hangovers after, the spotty memories.”
“I know, baby boy, but we are doing this together as much as we can. You know we always tell you what we’re gonna do so you are always consent beforehand. We are always in pairs or more to ensure we never cross a line. We’re in this together. Just like we were in the beginning. Trust us, trust Jin-hyung. If he says he’s going to free you from this, he’s going to. Just let go so we can help.”
“But…” Jimin words caught in his throat as his upper body started to buckle under the intense pleasure coursing through his body. Behind him, Taehyung had worked the other’s pants and drawers down and off his legs. Jimin’s cock was rock hard and dripping from Tae’s earlier work. But he didn’t seem in a hurry to give his soulmate that for which he was begging. Taehyung kissed his way up Jimin’s spine tattoos, beautiful moon phases, until his body draped across the other’s, nuzzling into Jimin’s heaving throat. The look of the two of them in such a way was so tempting, so sinful. But the look in Taehyung’s eyes was like a taunt, like a predator feigning innocents to lure it prey closer so it can strike with ease. It took a lot to get Taehyung in this kind of mood. He set his hyung with one more tempting stare before working his way back down Jimin’s trembling body, daring him to look anywhere else. Long, tan fingers trailed across pale skin, kneading and caressing the taut ass. Jimin breathy moans were begging for more. Tae spread those cheeks and dragged his hot tongue across his sensitive hole.
Jimin gasps and tried to lose himself in the sensation, wanting to drop against the mattress. Only, Yoongi’s hold under his chin kept him up. “Uh-uh, focus on me.”
“Fuck both of you,” he panted through gritted teeth.
“Don’t act like you are not enjoying this. You always love when I make you beg for it. And I do love watching you come completely undone.” As if on cue, Jimin’s body seized and a desperately wanton moan escaped his panting lips. From behind him, Taehyung had moved on from lapping and sucking at Jimin’s hole, to slipping two fingers in with ease. He was relentless, hitting everywhere but where the other needed him, just to keep him on the edge. Tae fixed his hyung with a look as he removed his long fingers, sucking on them nice and slow. He’s really worked up tonight. Then, he drove his fingers back in, along with his tongue. It was the best kind of torture. And only helped to drive Yoongi’s point. “You need to be good if you want to be rewarded. And good boys don’t push their limits farther than they know they should. Do you understand, love?”
“Yes, yes! I get it,” Jimin cried. “I’m sorry Hyung! I’ll be good. Now, please fuck me like you love me!”
Yoongi reached forward and hauled Jimin into his lap and away from Taehyung’s administration. He swallowed all of Jimin’s cries as he thrusted his tongue deep into the other’s mouth and stroked the younger at a feverous pace. He was already so close that it only took a few strokes before Jimin’s body shuttered violently as he cam hard against his hyung’s chest. On the bed, Tae had stretched out across the mattress, stoking him long cock, lazily, as he watched the site before him.
Jimin’s body sagged against Yoongi’s, resting his head against the other’s shoulder as he tried to catch his breath. His body felt electrified, pulsing with want and desire for more. Especially since his hyung wasn’t giving his all. “Daddy,” he tried, making his voice as desperate and whiny as he knew would make the others weak, “please, I need you in me. I need you to fuck me.”
Yoongi leaned forward and rested their foreheads against each other. “I know, baby boy. But I won’t be as much fun tonight. I will make sure you get all you want from Tae-Tae. I just got somethings on my mind.”
“Or someone,” Taehyung challenge from the bed. Yoogni’s eyes shifted over Jimin’s shoulder. Taehyung’s eyes were pointed with a teasing smile on those full lips. He was like a predator playing with his prey, playing a dangerous game. “A certain pretty nurse, perhaps?”
And there was reason number three: someone new had changed the dynamic of their relationship. It had happened before when someone ended up spending a lot of time with one of them, and the others started feeling territorial. They were all young, sexual beings who always loved to remind each other to whom they all belonged. Yoongi should have realized that when after he had made lunch for you, Jungkook had cornered him in the shower after you returned home.
“What are you talking about?”
“Don’t play that game with me, Hyung. I see the way you’ve been looking at her recently. Seen how you started getting a bit more friendly. A little nightingale syndrome?”
“Oh Hyung,” Jimin smiled, “do you have a crush on our new friend? It’s so cute.”
“I don’t know what you are talking about. But we shouldn’t bring her into this.”
“Come on, you look after her more than any other guest we’ve had to watch over. You’ve never brought anyone into your studio before. You have deep conversations with her, always checking on her. You even gave her your favorite jacket, even after buying her a new coat. And I heard about how you got all protective when Jackson was flirting with her. What else could it be than you having some lustful feelings?
“It’s called doing my job. And being nice or replacing what I destroyed isn’t lust. Will you knock it off?”
“Oh, but how can I when she’s just so adorable? She’s so sweet and innocent.” Taehyung started stroking himself harder, eyes never lowering from Yoongi’s. “And definitely could use some love. God, you should have heard her today in the gym. I was helping her stretch and -fuck- the sounds she tried to stifle? God, makes me wonder what kind of sounds she’d make when I’m fucking her. Is she a screamer or one of those that bit her lips to keep quiet? And she’s so soft. When she hugs me, it makes me wonder how it’d feel if her nails clinging on.”
“I know what you mean,” Jimin moaned at the thought, turning in Yoongi’s lap to face the bed, cock hardening again. “When I carried her up the stairs, she felt so good pressed against my back. Bet her thighs would feel even better around my head. Can’t say that didn’t cross my mind recently. My bet is that she’d start out all shy, trying to hide. Definitely would need constant praises. Probably be all nervous and flushed, like how Jungkook was the first time. Speaking of, Jungkook said that when she traced his tattoos, he had to jerk off in the bathroom before he came back into the room. What do you say, Hyung? She’s had her hands on you the most? Do you think she could make us cum just from her touch? Bet her hands would feel so great against my cock.”
Yoongi tightened his hold on Jimin. But, thinking back, he had been playing more attention to you than he had to other charges. Granted, this was a newer situation. And he hadn’t been so quick to open up when other people had been in their home. Ever since he woke up in the hospital, seeing you sleeping across the room, you had crossed his thoughts more than he would willingly admit. When he had heard from Jin that you were sick, something protective lit up in his mind the same way if they were sick. But it wasn’t a crush, was it? No, he was just being friendly, right? “I think you two should stop objectifying her. She isn’t a plaything for you.”
“I wouldn’t mind if she was,” Taehyung smirked.
“Seriously, you all didn’t act like this when Namjoon brought Hwasa around.”
“I mean, it’s Hwasa. You know how she is. And we did, but only for the first day. But she’s not really our type. She’s… a lot. Honestly, we were surprised Namjoon lasted as long as he did.”
“And Y/N is something new. A completely different taste.” Taehyung dragged his long fingers across his dripping slit and up to his lips, punctuating his point.
“Hyung, it’s okay to think she’s cute. In fact, it’s cute that you have a crush. You don’t do emotions well. I say just go with it. It’d be adorable. But just like we told Namjoon, just remember who you have to come home too.”
“I don’t have a crush,” Yoongi warned. Right? He would really know, wouldn’t he? He was in a long going relationship with six other men. He should know the feeling.
“That blush says differently, Yoongi-hyung,” Jimin teased, only to be rewarded with a growl from his hyung and hard squeeze against his cock.
“Well, you better figure it out,” Taehyung said, fixing Yoongi with a challenging gaze, “otherwise I’ll ask her out and keep her all to myself. I’ll make her feel so much better. Even if it’s just a little fling.”
Yoongi growled, unconsciously, at the younger’s insinuation. Taehyung smirk, getting all the proof he needed from that simple action. Though, he almost hoped for the challenge. Yoongi wasn’t sure if Taehyung was serious or just winding him up. Either way, his words stuck in his head and brought a lot of questions to the forefront. And in time, he’d have to confront those thoughts. But for now, he needed to wipe that smirk off the younger’s face. Yoongi needed to teach that brat a lesson. And, unfortunately for Taehyung, Yoongi had the best plan that would kill two birds with one stone. The teasing smirk on Taehyung face slowly disappeared as his hyung’s eyes turned wicked and the thin line of his lips curved at the corner. Jimin’s head fell back onto Yoongi’s shoulder, pleasure steadily building under the elder’s skilled hands.
Never breaking eye contact, Yoongi nuzzled against Jimin’s throat. “My poor boy,” he crooned, voice dripping with danger. “So, so worked up. Has Tae been mean to you? Toying with you too much?” Jimin’s fingers clutched Yoongi’s hair as his whole body squirmed, begging for more friction. “Mhm, that’s what I was trying to tell you earlier. Tae’s been working me up all day. Cornering me in the hall but never finishing me off, sending pictures over chat, talking about all the things he’d hope we’d do tonight. He called me on the way home from dropping her off, stroking himself. That what I meant when I said it wasn’t just from the Euphoric.”
“Hmm, so mean to you. I think he needs to be taught a lesson, don’t you? What do you say we give him a taste of his own medicine?”
“Please, anything. I just need you.”
“I know, I know. And I’m going to give you what you want. But you need to do what I say like a good boy. Tae been so mean to you. Not letting you cum when you want. Running his mouth. Baby, be a good boy and go grab me your favorite cuffs and a gag. We’re going to cuff him to the headboard so you can do whatever you want to him as payback. And all he can do is stay there and moan. And you are going to do what I say and use him to get yourself off as much as you like. And he’s only going to be allowed to cum when you say he’s suffered enough. Then we’ll fuck him together. But only when he’s crying and begging. Does that sound like a good idea to you Baby? Oh, and don’t you smile over that Pretty Boy,” he glared at Taehyung, who seemed to get excited by the plan. “I ordered a new toy to torture Hoseok with that I think will be better served here. A vibrating cock ring to make sure you don’t cum until I release you. You wanted my attention, you got it. What’s you color, Pretty Boy?”
Taehyung was only slightly worried about what was about to happen to him. But oh-so ready for it. “Green.”
Be My Light: Chapter 11- Find Me and I'm Gonna live with you.
*Genre: Mafia, Angst, Slow burn, eventual smut
*Warnings: Mentions of illness, violence, kidnapping, and a little fluff
Authors Note: Hello again everyone. I have risen from the dead to bring you some back story of our favorite maknae. As before, I apologize for the delay but am always grateful for those who still read. I have copied and pasted the tag list from before and if you would like to be removed, please let me know. Feel free to drop a like, comment, or whatever you feel like. We are almost done with military drought, FIGHTING!! Also, posted on AO3 under the same name.
As the morning sun streamed through your balcony window, you felt as if your head was going to split. The dull ache that had started the previous afternoon had intensified into the worse migraine you had had in a long time. Of course, you had concealed that pain while you were at the Magic Shop; you had assumed it was a simple headache brought on by the weather or stress, and it wasn’t anything you needed to worry about then. You were quite wrong. Once you had returned home and taken the last of your aspirin, which did absolutely nothing, you realized what was happening. The first time you had suffered from a migraine like this was when you had first stopped taking your medicine regularly. And then again when you started running low and skipping more than a day. Any long-prescribed medication would have some side effects when not taken on its routine. It just seemed worse now that you had stopped all together. That, and the stress of the last few weeks probably added to it. It was clear that you needed something stronger than an aspirin to deal with this. Your head pounded, every move you made to try and get comfortable made you feel like you would heave, and your body wouldn’t let you sleep to escape the situation. What time was it anyways? How long had you been laying there?
One of the previous times you had suffered from a migraine, Amber had brought you some extra strength over the counter stuff that had helped. What was it called? You could barely form a single stream of thought, let alone what the name of something you had months ago was. You were pretty sure Amber had been put on the night shifts, based on her many complaints she had texted you. Maybe if you sent her a text, she could bring you some before Bangtan arrived. You groaned. You should texted them, too, and see if they just let you stay in your apartment. Would they even allow that? Surely, the scary Mafia must understand what a sick day is. You needed your phone. From under your cocoon of blankets, your hand slithered out-even that felt like too much- and grabbed it from its place on the side table. Once you hit the home button and the screen illuminated, you all but threw the phone as the blinding light cause the throbbing behind your eyes to intensify. And the loud ‘thud’ as the phone landed didn’t help either. You retreated back into the covers; you felt like you were going to throw up again. Maybe if you could force yourself to sleep for a few minutes, you could try again.
There was a soft knock on your door. “Y/N, are you okay? I heard something fall.”
Wait, was that Jimin? When had he gotten there? How late was it? You hadn’t heard the front door open or anyone come in. This migraine was really throwing everything off.
There was a soft tap at your door again. “Is it okay if I come in?”
You really wanted to say ‘no’. But you knew that wasn’t the polite option. Also, you hadn’t seen Jimin since the hospital. The first day at the Magic Shop, Hoseok had gone out to pick him up from whatever job he was up to. But when the rest of you had sat down for lunch, only Hobi had joined you all. He had claimed that Jimin wasn’t hungry and just wanted to rest. That was the last you had heard about him since. You wanted to ask the others when they were hanging around with you in the lounge or when you were wandering around the Magic Shop, but you figured it really wasn’t any of your business. But now that he was at your door, your curiosity was getting the better of you. You just wanted to see how he was feeling. Amber called it your fatal flaw; you were more concerned about everyone else’s wellbeing instead of your own. Trying to ignore the pulsing pain behind your eyes and the dizzying nausea that hit each time you moved even the smallest bit, you lifted the covers and called him in.
Your bedroom door creaked open and Jimin, cautiously, looked around the corner as if he was worried he was walking into something he shouldn’t. But when he saw you peering out from the darkened blankets like a gremlin, he snorted out a laugh and pushed the door open. He leaned heavily against the door frame and took in the sight before him. He looked tired. From your viewpoint, you could see that he was quite pale and worn. His golden hair was messy and peeking out from under a black beaning that he threw on in place of trying to tame it into his normal well-kept style. He wore a pair of dark jeans, an oversized yellow plaid flannel shirt with a white undershirt, and a leather jacket that was much too large for him but still looked warm. Notably, a pair of rose-colored sunglasses were perched high on the bridge of his nose, casting his light eyes and skin in a blushing hue. Even unkempt- by his standards at least- he looked amazing. He pushed off of the doorframe and crossed to the side of the bed. He squatted down and peered into your darkened hiding spot with a bemused smile.
“Good morning,” he said, voice cracking with a snicker. “Are we having a lie in?”
“What time is it?” Your voice sounded so strained and pained.
“Almost seven. Are you alright, Y/N? You don’t look so good.”
You tugged the blankets tight around you to block out all the light. “No, I feel so awful. I’m having the worse migraine. I haven’t slept at all because the room won’t stop spinning. My head feels like it’s splitting behind my eyes. Each breath makes me feel like I’m gonna throw up.”
You felt the mattress sag as he sat on the edge, a comforting hand landing on your shoulder. “Oh, poor thing. Did you try taking anything?”
“It didn’t help. I need something stronger. I was hoping to call a friend of mine to bring me something on her way home. But the light from my phone made it worse. I’m really sorry but I don’t think I will be of any use today. I should just stay here. I don’t think I can even walk without feeling worse. Had I realized how late it was, you wouldn’t have had to come all this way for nothing.” You sounded so guilty and pitiful.
You felt the mattress shift as Jimin moved. The edge of the covers lifted slightly and he peered down at you, his eyes penetrating yours from behind those rose-colored lenses. He kept his voice low so not to worsen your migraine further. “Don’t think like that. It’s not for nothing. I’m glad I’m here, otherwise you would be worse off. I can take care of things for you. I think I saw a pharmacy around the corner. We can go get what you need from there and do whatever you think you need to feel better. Just tell me what to do.”
Then, as if the universe had some sick sense of humor, the quiet peace of your room was swallowed up by the loud intrusion of heavy truck motors and construction workers yelling. There had been posted notices up around your building for a month that there was going to be a demolition crew taking down a condemned building just down the way and there would be a lot of noise. Of course, you hadn’t remembered that, with all that had been happening as of late. The roar of a truck and its stabbing ‘beeps’ as it backed itself into position felt like the workers were taking their sledgehammer against your skull instead. The foreman’s loud whistle for attention and shouts of directions drove you to stuff your head under your pillow to try and find some solace. Sadly, life had it out for you in every single way.
Jimin had rose up and crossed to the glass slider that overlooked the street. All the noise was draining his own ability to hide how he was truly feeling. These last few days have been hard, not that he wasn’t used to it by this point in his life; the body aches and pains, the headaches and fevers, the exhaustion and mood swings that he struggled with until he decided to take his medicine were all a part of his routine. Just a bit longer. I can make it, he kept telling himself. But the construction noises were starting to push him to his limits, more so than the bright sunlight he was staring against despite his shades. Though, the glasses were for other purposes than just protection from the light. He looked back towards the bed at the sound of your painful moans. It seemed pretty obvious what his next move needed to be.
Jimin crossed back to the edge of the bed and slipped his head under the covers, trying to keep as much darkness as he could for both of your sake. You slipped from under your pillow to gaze at him with a teary expression.
“Just kill me now.”
He smiled sympathetically and tucked a stray bit of hair behind your ear. “I wouldn’t dream of doing that to you. I already like you very much. Look, I know you don’t want to go anywhere but I can’t see this being a good option for you in this state. Let me take you to the Magic Shop. You don’t have to do anything but rest, and we can just keep an eye on you until you feeling better. We have a lot of stuff back home that could help- nothing illegal. And Jin-hyung always knows what to do when I’m not feeling good. And we have a few spare rooms you can use. We always have them made up, just in the case of company. Theres not windows so the sun won’t hurt you like it is now, and it’s super quiet, especially since most of the guys won’t be there for most of the day. Come on, Y/N. It's gonna be much better than here. Please?”
To be honest, you don’t think you would have turned down his offer at this point. But something about the pull of his voice and the pleading look in those eyes made it even more impossible. You nodded your head and let him help you into a sitting position. Your head throbbed and the room spun a bit, but his hands on your shoulders helped ground you. You pressed your palms against your eyes against the brightness of the room.
“Here, eyes closed for a second.” You obeyed and felt something slide across your face and against your nose. “These help me.”
You opened your eyes, and the world had gone pink. Jimin’s rose-colored glasses eased the pain against your eyes. You gave him a grateful smile. And he looked amazing in pink, less tired. And somehow, his eyes seemed clearer than before. You set to trying to focus on moving.
Jimin moved quickly about the room, also feeling a sharp headache coming on from the roaring of machinery outside. As he turned, he caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror. Jimin refused to look himself in eyes, unhappy with the desperate looking person he saw. He spotted the backpack you always brought with you leaning against the foot of the bed. Quickly glancing inside, he was relieved to see a change of clothes already in the bag; you had started bringing some loungewear to change into if you felt like using their gym in between sessions with Yoongi or lunch with whoever else was hanging around with you. At least I don’t have to go through her drawers, Jimin bemused to himself. He zipped up the bag, then his eyes caught sight of a very familiar sight. Yoongi’s black jacket, the one he treasure so much yet gave to you, was hanging delicately on the back of the door. Instantly, he felt a comforting warmth spread through him. Memories of sliding his hands into the pockets when his hands were freezing, trying to slip inside despite Yoongi wearing it, and leaning his cheek into the collar when he would hug his hyung from behind surfaced and chased some of those sick feelings away. He reached over and took it from the hook. Before he could stop himself, he buried his nose into the fabric and inhaled deeply. Somehow, it stilled smelled like home. Only now, there was a hint of you in it to that seemed fitting. Jimin always found that when he didn’t feel so well, being surrounded by the scents of those who cared and loved him was just as good as any other medicine. Hence why he had stolen Jungkook’s beanie, Namjoon’s flannel, and Taehyung’s leather jacket. With a smile, he returned to your side and put the familiar jacket over your shoulders.
You were still in your pajamas – a black long sleeve shirt and plaid pants- but it would do. If your brain could focus on anything other than the throbbing pain against your eyes, you would have made some comment about being thankful for being able to put on clothes before trying to sleep. You slid your arms into the coat and took your backpack from Jimin. Pulling it onto your back, you tried to stand up, only to stagger as your equilibrium was destroyed. Suddenly, you felt yourself being pressed into something warm and the calming smell of cologne and the Magic Shop filled your senses. Arms locked under your legs as Jimin hoisted you a bit higher on his back and your arms instinctually wrapped around his neck.
“I got you, Y/N. Just relax, I promise we’ll take –..,” he stopped as one of your hands went moved up to press against his forehead. “Are you seriously checking my temperature right now?”
“I can’t help it,” you said, burying your face into his shoulder so he couldn’t see the blush that had started to form. “You’re really warm. You have a fever. The others said that you were sick and you still are, aren’t you? You should really take something for that.”
“Look who’s talking. I’m not so bad. I can make it a few more days,” he said, trying to hide his feelings behind a smile and an air of nonchalance.
“No,” you whined and tightened your hold. “Please, you need to take care of yourself. Waiting will only make it worse. Promise me you’ll take care of yourself. Please, Jimin.”
Jimin let out a sigh and turned his head to catch a glimpse of you over his shoulder. “Seriously? A minute ago, you were asking me to kill you, and now your more worried about my health than your own?”
“It’s my fatal flaw. That’s why I ran into a building full of gunmen.” He laughed and you felt it all through your body. “Please promise me. I won’t be able to get well if I worry about you.”
“Oh, blackmail. You sure you aren’t one of us?” You gave him a squeeze with your thighs in lieu of punching him in the arm. “Okay, okay. I promise I’ll take better care of myself. It’s gonna take a couple of days, but I’ll be good as new soon. Now, let’s forget about me and focus on you.”
Satisfied, you allowed yourself to be lolled into a half-conscious state as the warmth and smell that was uniquely Jimin distracted you from everything. Before you knew it, you were being lowered into the backseat of a car and Jimin sliding in next to you. You leaned your head against his shoulder and barely heard him signal to the driver to go. The car was nice and dark. At some point in the ride, you could feel him shift as he brought his phone up to his ear. He instructed someone to get the spare room ready and find something to help you. You could hear a muffled voice of the other berating him on the other end. It didn’t last long because Jimin hung up his phone and tossed to the other side of the back seat. Jimin stretched out his legs and leaned his head against yours. Both of you relaxed as the car swayed through the traffic. It was nice; it reminded Jimin of the little moments he shared with the others when they didn’t have to be Mafia leaders. It was odd finding that same peace with someone that wasn’t Bangtan. But there was something about you that just clicked for him. Had he felt better, and not thrown his phone, he would have taken a picture to taunt Jungkook with. But for now, he just wanted to lose himself in this comfortable moment. You both needed rest and just having someone next to you felt so much better than sitting alone.
Time slipped by oddly quickly, meaning you must have actually dozed off. You woke to Jimin whispering that you had arrived. He slipped out of the car and held out his hand for you. Once again, he pulled you on his back, silencing your protest with a simple ‘hush’. You were in the underground garage. And then, you were in the entrance hall and halfway up the stairs. Wait-had he just carried you up all those stairs and made it seem like this was nothing to him? How strong was he?
“Jimin!” Seokjin’s annoyed voice announced his presence before you could spot him. “If you ever hang up on me again, I will ensure you will regret it.”
“Sorry, Hyung. Must have lost you in a tunnel.”
You could practically hear Jin roll his eyes. “Tunnel my glorious ass. You’re lucky I don’t bash your head in. Do you realize what you could have done? What could have happened?!”
“Don’t yell at him,” you whined, waving you hand dismissively at Jin. “He doesn’t feel well still.”
“Oh, I am very well aware of that, Darling. And if he would have just listened to me before, he probably would have been feeling better by now. But no, he has to be stubborn. He thinks he knows more than someone who spent half of his life learning medicine and taking care of him for the past decade.”
“It’s my body, Hyung. I know my limits. And I am not an invalid. I can still do things around here.”
“Says the one who couldn’t keep his food down last night or the day before. Or do I need to bring up how you would rather force yourself to sleep than actually dealing the with problem?”
“I just wanted to help. I felt more alive this morning and just wanted a distraction.”
“And turning off my alarm clock was your idea of helping?”
“I knew you had a stressful day today and I just needed to get out of the house for a tiny bit. I figured it was the perfect distraction for me and you could use the rest before… well, your meeting. I didn’t even drive there. I had one of the drivers take me. Everyone was safe. We were there and back in no time and nothing was out of the ordinary. No big deal. I was careful; she didn’t see anything.” Were they still worried about you seeing how to get to the Magic Shop?
“I can see that.” Jin leaned over towards you. He pressed the back of his hand against your forehead. “Poor Darling. May I?” He took the glasses from your face and placed them back on Jimin’s. The Magic Shop’s lights were lower than before. “I took the liberty of not turning on all the lights. Jimin told me what was going on. It would have been nice to have more time to set our spare room up better but it will do for now. Let’s get you more comfortable. Hopefully, you will be a better patient than this one.”
“Be nice to him,” you pleaded. “He was only trying to help. And he did promise to take care of himself.”
“Did he now?”
“Yeah, I guilted him into taking some medicine.”
“Is that true?”
You felt Jimin shrug as he started back up the stairs. “What can I say? She is very good at blackmailing people.”
“Oh, is that all it takes? A pretty face and big eyes for you to take your medicine? Then I should had have Jungkookie deal with you.”
“As if that would have done much. I threw him out the first night he tried to make me. When do the others get back? We can deal with all of it when they get here.”
“Not until dinner. But I’ll handle it. You just rest until then and we’ll come up with a plan. But for now, let’s deal with this Darling first.”
Next thing you knew, you were being lowered onto the most comfortable bed you had ever felt. It took everything in you not to just sink into the mattress and the fluffy comforter. You looked about the spare room. How something this nice could be considered a spare room made you wondered how their actual bedroom looked. The room was decently sized with dark hardwood floors that matched the rest of the Magic Shop. The walls were high, leading up to beautiful crown molding lined ceiling. Behind the ornate crown molding were strips of lights the bathed the dark room in a soft green glow that eased the pains behind your eyes. Hmm, someone knows about light therapy, you mused.
Jin gave Jimin a shove towards the door once you were more settled. The younger didn’t put up any fight, smiling over at you before leaving the room. Jin turned back to you. “Jimin means well. Seems like you two have something in common. You both care more about others than yourself. Here, I had my assistant go get these from the pharmacy. See, still in its sealed blister pack.”
Jin held out the migraine medication for you to inspect. It was the best one on the market. “At this point,” you muttered as you held out your hand for it, “I’d even take whatever you create down in the basement of yours if it means feeling better.”
Jin snickered as he placed the medicine in your hands with a glass of water. “You make me sound like a mad scientist. I’m just the disgraced son of the biggest pharmaceutical dynasty in the whole country. Which reminds me, I need to get going. It’s my annual meeting with the shareholders. My father, hopefully, will make his usual excuse so I don’t have to deal with him. But I will be able to talk with some of my good friends to see if we can figure out this mysterious medicine of yours. Quick tour before I leave though. Jimin really didn’t give me much time to really prepare the room but I’m sure you’ll find all you need. The bathroom in just through there; feel free to use any you want. We always try to keep a good supply of things in the case of company. And there’s fresh towels if you want to take a bath. Your bag it just by the desk. And there is some water in the mini fridge just beside it, if you need some. I’m sure Yoongi has already seen us in the cameras, but I’ll go make sure he knows what’s happening. His studio is at the end of this hallway if you need him. And I’ll tell him to do his own treatments today without you. Don’t push it, Darling, I mean it. You’ve been working non-stop, it’s time to take care of you. Jungkookie is staying here today too. If you need anything, just let him know. Now, lay back and get comfortable. You look exhausted. Are the lights okay? They always help Namjoonie when he has a migraine.”
You simply nodded as you leaned back against the pillows. Jin pulled your sneakers off and pulled the blankets up around you. You felt so warm and secure. You didn’t even notice when he slipped out the door and closed it behind him, leaving you in the soft emerald glow. Soon, you felt yourself falling deeper and deeper into the most comfortable sleep you had had in a very long time. It was safe. And that was the last thought before you fully surrendered to the pull of sleep.
You really couldn’t tell how long you had been sleeping. A small creak of a door penetrated your deep slumber. You really couldn’t tell if it had really happened or was just part of a dream. Somewhere in the in-between, there were soft footsteps that came closer to the bed. Still, your eyes were heavy. You must have been dreaming, you decided, when you thought you felt someone’s hand touch your forehead. But only more so when that hand tucked a strand of hair behind your ear and traveled down your cheek. You, instinctively, turned into that warm hand, seeking the longing comfort it brought. It was a dream after all. It felt as if a thumb traced across your cheekbone before withdrawing. Then the door closed again.
Soon, you pulled yourself from your slumber, feeling so rested. Your cellphone was set on a charging station on the bedside table. The home screen indicated that you had been asleep for almost four hours. And you felt great! Your headache had eased to only a dull annoyance, your nausea was gone, and you felt revitalized. You yawned and stretched as you sat up in bed, inhaling deeply. There was a lingering smell in the room that hadn’t been there before. It was familiar and soothing. Your eyes caught sight of the black jacket folded neatly on the bedside table. That had to be it. Maybe it just smelled stronger in the closed room than before.
You remade the bed, grabbed your bag from where Jin had placed it, and crossed to the bathroom. Just like the rest of the Magic Shop, the bath was like walking into a grand resort. There grey tile across the floor, marble countertops with quartz sinks, a clawfoot tub, and a walk-shower. On the counter, there was a basket full of different products like face washes, shampoos and conditioners, body washes, and more. They were from high end brands and for many different body types and needs.. In one of the drawers there was some makeup wipes and removers. You wondered if that was more for if a girlfriend was over. Your mind flashed back to the hospital that first night when Hwasa has cornered Namjoon in the hallway. Despite his response to you, there seemed to be history there. And it with the type of products you were finding, it would make sense. Also, all of Bangtan were good looking guys; there was no way they were single.
You filled the tub with hot water and plopped a eucalyptus bath bomb you found into the water. It had been a long time since you had taken a bath, mostly sticking with a shower since that’s all you had. You scrubbed your body and just let yourself relax for a bit before rinsing off and sampling some other products. Once your face was cleaned and moisturized, you brushed your teeth with a sealed toothbrush you found in a drawer and changed into a fresh pair of clothes. After hanging up the fluffy towels and tidying up the room, you slipped the familiar jacket on and ventured out into the hallway.
Remember what Jin said about Yoongi’s studio helped orientate you. True to his word, Taehyung had made you a map and had helped you find your way when you wandered around alone. You walked down towards the studio; you wanted to let him know that you were feeling better so he would worry about you. Would he though, you wondered. You were friendly with them but was it to that extent? Maybe to Jimin and Jin. Either way, it would be the nice thing to do. You found yourself in front of his door and knocked. No response. You knocked again. But still no answer. Maybe he was resting? You shrugged and moved back down the hall. You decided to try and find Jungkook. You tried to text him but he hadn’t responded. So, you decided to head towards the living room where you had spent most of your time. You figured that if they were looking for you, that would be a good place to look.
“Fucking piece of shit,” you heard as you approached the door to that living room. Peering in, you found Jungkook. He was seated on the floor, back against the couch, staring intently at the television. He had connected his game system and was furiously smashing a series of button on his keyboard. On the screen, you recognized it as a game that Amber had play constantly when you were staying with her. She even played a mobile version on her phone while on break at work. You were never good at games, but you liked to watch. “Think you can snipe me? Think again,” Jungkook sneered at the character on the screen as positioned his avatar and fired a sniper shot. He smirked as the opponent disappeared.
You entered the room and crossed to the couch as the screen flashed with the end of the round. “Did you win?”
Jungkook jump, clearly so engrossed in his game that he hadn’t heard you approach him. “Noona, when did you get here? Are you feeling okay? Was I too loud?”
“No, it’s fine. I just got here. I’m feeling much better. Did you win? Looks pretty tough.”
“Oh, yeah. Just some practice rounds with some online friends. I haven’t played them in a while and decided to remind them why am I the best in the region,” he grinned a cocky smile before starting up another round.
You settled on the couch and watched as he moved across the map in search of his opponent. On the side of the screen, there was a chat going with the online friends he had mentioned. He explained that they were, essentially, playing a game of hide and seek that would end in a shootout. Which is how Amber explained it too. You smiled. Clearly, Jungkook had the advantage of having real life experience as he reacted quicker than you could ever to the slightest movement on the screen. All while also replying to the chat. Two opponents were dispatched within the first five minutes of game play, and they were ranting all through the chat. One was left. An avatar in colorful raver gear swung across the screen and disappeared with some advantage she had. A smoke grenade covered the screen and she used that to sneak attack and take five hit points. Jungkook seemed to get more annoyed as he chase after her, but she was good at avoiding him. He talked about how this person was usually the last one he had to get when they played this version of the game. How she was good at quick movements and gathering advantage items while he just used what he started with. You watched him analyze the game, bemused with the way he wrinkled his nose and narrowed his eyes, or the way he jumped and tried not to swear too much with you in the room. His status as youngest member was definitely showing. It reminded you how young he still was.
You turned back to the screen and your eyes widened as you caught the name of the opponent as she taunted him in the chat: ElectricLlama. That was Amber! Which meant-
“Are you Seagull-eye97?”
He froze, clearly not expecting that. Sadly, for him, it cause him to freeze long enough for ElectricLlama to throw a bomb at him and end the round, leaving the score tied between them.
“How’d you know my screen name?”
“That’s my best friend Amber! She plays you all the time. She’s always talking about you! You and her are in some kind of feud.”
“Your friend is ElectricLlama?”
“Oh my god, how did I not realize that was her until now? It looks just like her. She says you’re really good.”
“She’s good too. I’m just better.” He started the final round to determine the winner.
“If only I could tell her I’m working for her mortal enemy. She’d be busting down the door to get to you.”
You watched as he moved across the screen, him being the hider this round. Amber kept taunting through the chat and in game but Jungkook didn’t take the bait. He had something to prove now. This friendly game had turned now that he knew you were watching. He slinked through the terrain and aimed his weapon. ElectricLlama moved into view, not seeing him. Jungkook had her in his scope, ready to snipe her. But then, he switched weapons. No more guns, now it was a knife. He ran up on her and started close combat. He could have ended it so quickly but he wanted to draw it out, to prove a point. His fingers flew across the keyboard. Amber put up a good fight. But in the end, she was no match for Jungkook and her avatar fell to the floor and the game ended.
“She’s pissed,” you said as she watched Amber’s blow up the chat. “I’m gonna hear about that later.”
“She should be used to it. But she’s still one of the best one’s I play against.”
Jungkook sent some replies before signing off and disconnecting his game system. He was wearing a short sleeve shirt and you got to see all his tattoos on display. All up his arm were intertwining images from symbols and words, all combining in a unique way that flowed nicely. When he turned back to ask if you wanted to watch something, you asked him about his tattoos. At first, he shyly shrugged at the question. But when you leaned forward to admire the Tigerlily he had, he started explaining them to you. It amazed you the amount of care and work he had put into it. He explained why he got it, what it meant to him, and even if it hurt. You noticed the way his eyes sparked as he continued to speak. It was nice to see how much he had become more comfortable with you around him, remembering the first day when he could barely make eye contact with you. He started animatedly explaining about some of his first tattoos that were covered up with some more meaningful imaging, stuttering and tripping over his own words as his mouth moved quicker than his brain. It was kind of cute, you confessed. Through the tour of his ink, one that you didn’t see was his Gang tattoo. You squinted your eyes and tried to trace all the images like it was a hiding game.
Jungkook noticed your studious face and snorted. “What are you doing, Noona?”
“So, I know Yoongi’s Bangtan tattoo is on his shoulder. And Namjoon showed me his is on his wrist. Is yours, also, on your arm? Hidden among this menagerie?”
Again, he snorted a laugh. “No, mine is..” He started to tug down the loose collar of his shirt only to realize, quickly, what he was doing. His cheeks flushed and he cleared his throat. Jungkook placed his hand over his heart instead. “Mine is here. Some families will have them in similar body placements. There are some that will have them in the exact same place to show that they are all the same. And others just put it wherever. But there are a few families, like ours, that put them in places that have a deeper meaning.”
“Really? That’s very insightful. What does it mean, if you don’t mind me asking.”
Jungkook shrugged. “I think it’s okay, Noona. I don’t see any real issue telling you what I can. Let’s see. Yoongi-hyung’s tattoo is on his shoulder because he’s always placing himself in front of us, protecting us. And we always have his back to support him. Jimin-hyung’s is on his ribcage because it’s one of the most painful places to get inked. And he says he would go through great pains for Bangtan. Hobi-hyung’s in on his ankle so we are always with him every step of the way. Jin-hyung’s is on his hip and Taehyungie’s in on his inner thigh. Umm…” he stumbled, coughing back a laugh. “Those are for more private reasons that I don’t think I should get into right now. But Namjoon-hyung and mine are for the same reasons. Bangtan is our heartbeat, our bloodline. Without it, I don’t really know what we would do. Bangtan is much more than a gang to us. It’s our everything.”
“Yoongi has described it like that, too.”
“Well, it’s true,” Jungkook said with pride. “People look at Bangtan and just see a dangerous group of guys. I mean, we are but that depends on what side you’re on. But we do so much more than that. We do a lot of good, and not just for the community or the free people who need us. But for each other. We’ve been there through rough times, scary events, all of it. We’re a family. They are so much of why I am the person I am today. Without them, I don’t know who I’d become. I’d never want to be anything else. If someone gave me the opportunity to do life over again, I’d still choose them.”
You could only nod, taking in all he said. He would choose to be apart of this life? Or was that more that he would choose to be with them? You leaned back into the couch cushion and tried to wrap your head around his confession. From what Yoongi had told you, he didn’t have a choice, being sold out by his parents to an evil society leader. And he had gotten so angry at you when you had assumed he had made the others join his lifestyle. But Jungkook would willingly be with them again and again. Yoongi had repeated that he gave the others a choice. But who would choose this life? Being at the center of violence by choice seemed so odd to you. But then, again, some people join the military or become a police officer like your father had. Was it so different? And it wasn’t like they were like Choi and his men, just wanting to spread chaos and fear.
Jungkook plopped down beside you on the couch and started trying to find something to watch. You kept glancing at him out of the corner of your eyes. He looked so young. Thinking back to your introduction back at the hospital and what you had learned since. Bangtan had been together for many years and the final battle with Ji was five years ago. Yoongi had said that he had escaped from the Royals when he was eighteen and Namjoon was about seventeen. And they must have formed Bangtan around that time. Now Jin was a year older than Yoongi, and Jungkook was the youngest of them all. You studied Jungkook more, doing calculations in your head. But you must be off. There was no way someone that young would willingly join up.
“Noona,” Jungkook waved his hand in front of your eyes, snapping you out of your mental acrobatics. “You’re staring at me. It’s kind of creepy.”
“Sorry, I just,” you turned your body towards him to give him your full attention. “Can I ask you something? I’m really trying to understand all this. How long have you been with Bangtan?”
“Since the beginning,” Kookie said with a grin. “I mean, technically that’s when the Hyungs escaped the Royals and started running little jobs here and there. They didn’t really consider themselves a gang then. They say Bangtan was fully completed when I showed up.”
“I guess what I’m really asking- and you don’t have to go into details if you don’t want to- how old were you?”
“Oh, thirteen.”
“Thirteen?! I may not remember what I did when I was thirteen, but I can say that most thirteen-year-olds are more focused on after-school programs, getting ready for high school. Not running around with people trying to shoot them.”
“It’s not that young,” he replied, sheepishly.
“How does a thirteen-year-old decided they want to join a gang? I know that Yoongi was taken when he was fifteen, but he said his story is different than the rest. That the rest of you had a choice.”
“I’m still shocked that he told you that story. When I came along, only Namjoon-hyung and Hobi-hyung knew, and that’s because they were there. He didn’t open up about that to the rest of us until a year after we came out as a group. And he was incredibly drunk that night. It’s not an easy thing for him to remember. You must be something special, Noona.”
“So, I’ve been told. I’m just trying to understand better. Can you tell me your story? I can’t wrap my head around someone so young joining up, let alone choosing to over again. I mean, if you don’t want to, you don’t have too.”
Kookie smiled and leaned back into the sofa, getting comfortable. “Oh sure, I don’t mind. Its no where near as bad as Yoongi-hyung’s. The worst was me having to practically beg them to let me join. Don’t look at me like that. It’ll make sense.”
******************
The Jeon family lived in a small fishing village a few hours outside of Central. In fact, Jungkook wasn’t aware of Central or the issues that were happening in it. He lived with his parents in a single room apartment, helped on their boat, and spent time at the village community center learning taekwondo from a local teacher who watched children while the parents were working late. That had been his routine since he was three. And while his parents were just barely making ends meet, they were a happy family. It wasn’t until he got older that he started to realize how little they could afford. He tried to want for nothing and his folks were thankful for such a good kid. But they, also, wanted better for him. So, they worked longer hours to be able to afford a better life for their son. When he was thirteen, he knew he would have to travel to the next town for high school and that was going to be expensive for his family. And his free coach had recommended to his father that he would benefit from enrolling in an after-school taekwondo class if they wanted to further his future endeavors. Which would add more to their already stretch finances. He tried to tell his father that he could do without and not to worry, but his father still wanted better for him. It was a lot of weight to add to his shoulders without his parents realizing. He would hear them discussing how they would swing it and he couldn’t really see a good solution. And it got more worrisome when his mother announce she was expecting his little brother.
He wanted to do more for his family’s sake, help them save up to a better life for all of them and not just him. There were plenty of kids his age working in their village or leaving town for work. While he was playing an online game with a friend, he found out about a taekwondo tournament that would be happening in this city his friend moved to called Central. Winners got prize money, and for certain age groups, they would receive scholarships. His friend encouraged him to come for a visit and compete because he was sure Jungkook would win something. And while they were together, they could earn some money around Central; there were opportunities on every corner. It was tempting. And to a thirteen-year-old who wanted to help his family financially, that’s all it took.
He told his folks he was going for a summer visit, at least then they could just focus on saving money without trying to feed him. He met his friend at a bus terminal and they started going about the city. His friend told him about the fighting that had been taking place in the city and pointing out who he suspected was apart of the gangs. There were bad gangs and a few good, if you could call it that. The Royals were the tops, a product of the Big 3 that once ruled. 2NE1 was a sister group of theirs that mostly kept to jewel heist and smashing things. SHINee was from a different family, and they dealt with underground seizures up north. But the one that really caught Jungkook’s attention was a small up and coming group named Bangtan Sonyeondan. Apparently, they were made up of some defectors from the Royals and would do anything to stop their plans. One day, while running deliveries for his friend’s uncle, they were able to see a few members of Bangtan as they jumped a known Royal rally point. And they were so cool in Jungkook’s eyes. Especially, the leader known as Rap Monster. Anytime anyone was talking about them, Jungkook could help but listen and idolize them. There was one time, when a Suit had held up a convenience store that Rap Monster and Jungkook happen to be in. The Suit ran with Bangtan’s leader on his tail. Now, a normal person would stay out of the way. But Jungkook was always wanting to help. As if on autopilot, the young kid grab bigger guy and executed an over the shoulder throw. The next thing he knew, Rap Monster was next to him and ruffled his hair. ‘Thanks kid,’ he said before throwing the money back towards the owner and dragging the Suit into the alleyway.
After showing off his very basic skills, Jungkook’s friend got an idea. Since the competition was coming up soon, and Jungkook should be practicing, they would do some busking on the street. And take on any drunk wannabe for some extra cash. If his parents knew what he had been doing, they would have locked him up in seconds. But it did help them raise up the funds. By time the competition had come around, he had more than enough money for the entrance fee and enough to send home for his folks. From the practice he got from his busking escapades, he was surprisingly well equipped for the unknown opponents. By the end of the day, he had made it into the final round. And he had, also, caught the attention of a few predatory eyes.
When Jungkook and his friend were walking back home for the night, they were cornered by a big black van. Before either could react, the back door flew open and hands dragged them inside before it sped off again. They were gagged and had their hands tied with zip ties. And that was where he came face to face with the Crime Boss, Ji, for the first time. Jungkook would never forget that face for the rest of his life. They had been selected for the next round of recruits. Ji grinned as he threatened that if anyone tried to resist, their families would be shot in front of them. No one tried to run. In the van were four other teens, just like him, kidnapped and about to go through hell. Ji moved back into the front of the vehicle, leaving them all in the dark. His friend was hyperventilating, and Jungkook was trying to use his strength to snap the bindings. But a hard hit came from the side of the van and sent everyone flying. Over the muffled screams from the others, Jungkook heard the Royals swear on a name that gave him a bit of hope: Bangtan. Another hit came on the back bumper, and the van rolled onto its side and slid to a stop. Someone had landed on top of Jungkook, knocking the wind out of him, but everyone was alright. Screams and sounds of a fight broke out around the van.
Next thing the captives knew was the lock on the back door was being bashed in and the door fell open. But instead of Ji or one of the Suits, stood the leader of Bangtan with a bat covered in barbwire. Run or you’re gonna die, he had screamed at them. Five bodies scrambled out into the darkness. But Jungkook was stuck, trying to gather his wits about him. Where did his friend go? He didn’t know where he was or how to get back to the house. Rap Monster swung his bat with his whole body at an oncoming Suit trying to get at one of the escapees, yelling orders at someone named Agust to cover the new guy and Hope to watch out. That’s when the leader noticed Jungkook still huddled in the back of the van. Quickly, he rushed in and hauled him to his feet and out the vehicle. The streets was covering in broken glass and car parts, the smell of gas leaking on the streets filled his lungs, and flames ignited the fighting like a scene from a war movie. Rap Monster gave him a shove towards a direction. Go, before they see you! Get out of here kid! Go home! Home? But how could he get home? He didn’t know where he was and had no way to get back. Besides, Ji had threatened to kill their families which meant that he would find them if he could find his way home. He’d later learn that his friend he had been staying with had fled the city with his family that night and didn’t even think about looking for Jungkook out of fear.
But he did as he was told and just ran, hands still tied. And he didn’t stop running, even when the sounds of the van he was just in exploded when the flames finally found the gas leak. He ran into the night with no real direction. He knew he was fast; he had always had enough energy and stamina to outlast the best of them. The fear that someone would be following behind him kept his feet going. He weaved through alley ways and tunnels. As he rounded a corner, a familiar black truck flew past and a voice he recalled from the fight whooping in celebration into the silence of the night. That was Hope! He needed to catch up with them; they could help. His muscles screamed and his heart pounded against his ribs. It was a stupid idea but the only one that the thirteen could cling to in that moment of panic and fear.
He didn’t know how he managed but he ran to the outskirts of the city and found an abandoned gas station that was boarded. He could hide in there for the time being, he concluded. Then he saw the black truck tucked behind trash and debris. If he believed in angels, he would have dropped down to his knees and thanked them. He stumbled to the door, adrenaline finally waning fast. His feet shuffled in the dirt and knocked into a trash can, breaking the silence. The last thing he saw before he collapsed to the ground was Rap Monster coming from around the corner with his bat, before those dragon eyes went wide with worry.
**************
“Oh my god, you ran across the city? And somehow found them?” You were sure that your mouth was hanging open.
“Crazy right? It was like fate knew we were meant to be together. Yoongi-hyung and Jimin-hyung were suspicious of me then. I mean, it makes sense; a kid just captured by Ji somehow stalked them to their hideout? When I woke up, I was locked in a back room with a note taped to my shirt telling me not to panic and once they determined I was safe, they’d let me out or I’d be left there to rot. But Namjoon-hyung and Jin-hyung figured I wasn’t anything to worry about after a couple days. Ji had marked me ever since I had help hyung at the store. They knew he was planning on hand picking some kids from the competition to strengthen his ranks. Namjoon-hyung took me back to the city to find my friend. But my friend and his parents were gone. They had moved in between our capture and my rescue. They offered to drive me back to my parents. But I was too scared to go back home in case Ji was being truthful. They would ask me my address but I wouldn’t speak. I completely shut up, unless I was begging them to let me stay. I’m a bit ashamed to admit that I was on my knees and possibly crying a few of those times. Pretty sure they felt sorry for me because they decided to keep me with them for a little bit, kinda like how we’re doing with you. For protection until I could see that my family would be safe and I’d tell them where I lived. But I’m really stubborn. Despite the fact that they thought I was too young to do much, I would just try to be as helpful as I could, to earn my keep. Suga-hyung wasn’t too keen on having someone so young with them, especially since they already had Taehyungie hang around now and then. But we all just clicked.”
“And that’s when they asked you to join?”
Jungkook laughed. “I begged them to let me join them. I saw the good they were doing, saw how they were helping. And now that I had first experience with Ji’s intentions, I knew it would be hard for me to go back out there alone. Ji had hand-picked me after seeing my skills. I was a target and anyone I was around would be at risk. But Bangtan was already so strong, kept me safe, even before they knew just how strong I could get. They were worried I was too young. But my mind had been made up. I started slow, helping Jin with escape routes, listening for them. But the more I showed them how serious I was, the more it just seemed to fall into place. I had to wait a while to do any dangerous stuff, and even longer for some fun stuff. But in the end, it made sense and it proved a lot to everyone involved.”
“But if Ji hand picked you, weren’t you worried he could find you again?”
“At first, I was concerned. But then I realized. Anytime I had been out with my friend in Central, I had been wearing a face mask because I was worried about getting sick before the competition. And at the competition, my friend thought it would be a cool idea to keep it on. Ji never saw my face. I don’t think they noticed I was wearing it when they jumped me. That’s why I was able to walk around like a normal person while the hyungs had to cover up. I still cover up when we fight the Suits so I can still have anonymity when I game online.”
“So that’s why when you fought with Choi back at the hospital I saw you wearing it,” you said, realization dawning on you. “Do you still talk with your family?”
“Of course I do! I call home a couple times a week. Jin-hyung made sure that once I was sure about this life, that I could still see my folks and my brother. Ji was using scare tactics back then when he took me. But we made sure that they were save in our little village. And they came up with this great lie to make sure my parents didn’t know what I was really up to. Namjoon-hyung made it seem like I had won a full scholarship to a top school up north somewhere. Even made some fake documents to sign. Every month, he or Jin-hung would call with a progress report on my studies and behavior. Which was actually true. They ended up home-schooling me. Jin-hyung said that just because I wanted to join the gang didn’t mean I had the right to be an idiot. Now, my folks think I graduated and got a side job as security for Jin-hyung’s company, while also doing my streaming on the side. I send them money every so often.”
“Wow, that’s incredible. I never would have guessed any of that.”
“Told you I’d never force them into this,” came a deep voice from the door.
Yoongi was leaning against the door frame, clearly letting the story finish before he had stepped in. His red hair was messy, like he had ran his good hand through it multiple times. His arm was still in its sling. But in his other hand was a steaming bowl that smelled incredible. He pushed off the door frame and crossed over to the couch.
“Here,” he said, holding out the bowl for you. “I made lunch. Figured you might be hungry after what I heard from Jin-hyung. Since you weren’t in the guest room, I figured here was the next best choice.”
You took the bowl from him and gazed at it’s contents. It was the most delicious looking stew you had ever smelled. Instantly, your stomach rumbled at the sight of it. You dug in and a sense of warmth and calm settled over you. You could have sworn you saw a smirk flash across his face as he watch you enjoy his food.
“No way,” Jungkook exclaimed with wide doe eyes and watering mouth. “Hyung, you made galbitang? It’s been so long since you made that for any of us. Did you make some for me too?”
“You are not sick,” Yoongi said, matter-of-factly, giving the youngest his signature stone face. After a second of letting Jungkook’s face drop into a pout, he rolled his eyes and smirk. “Of course, I made enough for everyone. I only have one hand, buns. Go bring ours up.”
Like a kid at Christmas, Jungkook scrambled to his feet and flew out the door. Yoongi shook his head with a soft chuckle before turning his head back to you. He knelt down so not to keep looking down at you.
“How are you feeling? Jin-hyung said you weren’t so good this morning.”
You nodded between mouthfuls. “I’m feeling much better now. I think the stress of everything and the withdrawal from my old anti-anxiety medication caught up with me. But you guys are really helping me feel so much better. I’m sorry we have to cancel your treatment this morning. We can try after we eat.”
He waved you off and sat down next to you. “I think I’ll survive. Besides, its almost time for us to take this fucking thing off.” His lips made a tight line. “Sorry.”
“It’s okay. I’ve heard worse. Thank you for the stew. It’s amazing. You guys are really taking just a good care of me as I am of you.”
“It’s about time you had something nice done in return.” He tilted his head towards you, hair spilling into his eyes. “You’re more relaxed. Still think we’re not to be trusted?”
You wanted to roll your eyes. “I think I’m starting to get a better picture. Now that I know how much of a softie you all can be.”
“Alright,” he sneered, reaching for your bowl, “no more nice gestures from me. I’ll show you who’s a softie.”
You curled into a ball trying to protect your bowl of food from him as both your laughter’s filled the room.
Authors Note: How has it been so long? It's been a bit of a tough time but I have returned to my happy place. I hope you enjoy this look into the Magic Shop. I copy and paste the Tag List, so for those who no longer wish to be in it, I completely understand. Please just message me and I'll remove you. For any new interested readers who would like to be apart of the Tag List, same thing. Please just be patient with me. I'm on new any depressants and will be trying my very best to keep up with this. No matter what, I will never stop this fic and I will try my best to make any wait worth it. Feel free to drop a like, comment, or anything. Also posted on AO3 under the same name, Enjoy!
This is incredible, you found yourself repeating as you followed Taehyung through the Magic Shop.
The mansion was the prime example of the phrase ‘never judge a book by its cover’. Though, if you were being completely honest, Bangtan had shown many examples of that phrase the more you were around them. Where the outside of the Magic Shop was foreboding, broken, and cold, the inside was warm, modern, and inviting. And so well maintained. For a group of young men, the place was immaculate. You thought back to when Jin and Jungkook had cleaned your apartment on the first night and decided that you really shouldn’t be surprised. As you looked about the passing rooms, they were beautifully decorated in a modern style that really complimented everyone and the structure.
Taehyung had, first, led you down the spiral staircase under the front foyer into what you assumed were the old service areas. Now, it was an expansive garage lined with a vast variety of vehicles. You recognized the truck that Jin had driven you home in, the silver sports car that Taehyung had picked you up in that first day, and the town car that you had just been in. Heuning Kai waved at the two of you from his place by the town car, polishing it to look as new. You looked down the rows in awe. As you took in the fleet of cars, you started to understand that you had vastly underestimated how much money Bangtan must have had. But were all of these bought or were they spoils of the job? Or were some of them stolen? You were really trying not to think so poorly of your hosts, but could it really be helped?
“Nice, huh?” Taehyung crossed his arms with pride as he leaned against a very nice looking black two-door car. He nodded over towards the familiar pickup truck. “That was the first truck we bought back in the early days. We lived off of cheap ramen and stolen veggies, but it was worth it. Jin put a lot of hardware into it over the years. He stayed up a lot of nights reading mechanic books to make it work for us. Now we’re able to hire mechanics who will follow whatever design and dream he can think up to help us. Like bulletproof glass and exteriors, homing beacons, storage and seats that fold down so we can use the space for anything. They, even, have this feature that sends an alert to all of our phones if the vehicle’s ever in an accident so we can get to each other.”
“I suppose Jin thought of everything, didn’t he?”
“Yeah,” Taehyung smiled a huge boxy grin. “Jin-hyung is all about keeping us safe. He’s like the mom of our family. He’s always taken such good care of us.”
As your eyes roamed across the row of vehicles, your eyes caught sight of a sleek, black motorcycle in the farthest corner of the garage. You had always wanted to ride on one ever since one of Amber’s friends came by the hospital to show his new one off. But you had always been too scared to ask to ride along; working in the ER would do that to a person.
“Like that? That’s Jungkookie’s, He always wanted one. And Yoongi-hyung and Jiminie bought it for him as a graduation present to encourage him to finish school. He was so excited when he went to go pick it out. It’s his favorite thing. Seems like you like it too. I’m sure if you ask him, he’d take you on a ride. As long as he doesn’t combust from shyness. I’d suggest you wait until you’ve been around him more before you ask him.”
“Oh no,” you said, turning back towards Tae. “I don’t think that would be very smart. Do you know how many cases in my ER are from motorcycle accidents? I wouldn’t dream of it.” You were sure by the look on Taehyung’s face that he could hear the disappointment in your tone as you tried to fool yourself.
He smiled. “You know that is the same argument that Jin-hyung said when it was brought home. But I know I have a picture of them riding on it together.”
Taehyung, then, led you out of the garage. As you ascended the spiral stairs back into the front foyer, you were taken down the hallway where Namjoon had appeared towards the kitchen. The hallway was lined with what looked like framed family portraits of Bangtan throughout the years. There were some of them all together dressed all nice, and a few of them in random units posed in fun ways. It was interesting to see how they grew and changed over the years. But it was, also, sad to see how young they were. You paused in front of what appeared to be their first family photo. Where the other photos were in suits or business casual attire, their first picture looked as if they had watched too many hip-hop music videos. Dressed in fake basketball jerseys and hats, or in layered phony designer shirts and too much eyeliner, they looks so young and inexperienced. You almost didn’t recognize Namjoon with his crazy hair and dark glasses, or Jimin with his very tanned skin and shaggy black hair. And Jungkook looked like he had barely started puberty with his round doe-eyes. It really made you wonder what could cause such young kids to turn to gang life. Yoongi and Namjoon you understood since Yoongi had explained his side to you. But were all their stories the same? You had to figure out how to ask them.
The kitchen looked like it belonged to a showroom with top-of-the-line appliances set against stunning marble counter tops. You imagined this is what a world class chef would want. It was beyond clean and spacious with a large capacity refrigerator and freezer, a fully stocked wine cabinet that almost reached the ceiling, a huge stove and dual ovens, and a large island that could be used for anything. Off the main part, set against a large set of windows that overlooked a courtyard in the middle of the Magic Shop, was a cozy breakfast nook and a fully stocked coffee bar that could meet the needs of the pickiest of coffee drinkers. There were a few different machines for different types of coffee, syrups, stirrers, and different sugars. The enticing smell of whatever Namjoon had made still permeated the room.
The only thing that was missing was the staff to man such a space. Perhaps they had the morning off?
Taehyung opened up the fully stocked cabinets, pantry, and fridge to show off their contents and told you to that you would help yourself to anything whenever you wanted.
“We always make extra so you can have whatever. Or, if you would rather cook something for yourself, by all means. But since one of us will be with you, we may offer to do it.”
“You all cook?” You remembered the amount of food Jin had ordered the first night for you and figured that’s what they did regularly.
“Some of us do,” he remarked with a shrug. “Namjoon-hyung can only really make coffee. And my skills are a bit limited. But the others are really good at it. We always leave leftovers if we are out late on missions for the other. We try to have family dinner when we are all together. And we talked about letting you come too, since you’ll be here for a while. If you want, that is. But trust me, you’re gonna want to.”
“So, you make your own food? I would expect a place like this would come with a fleet of cooks since you all would be…busy.”
Taehyung laughed. “You would think so. But we are pretty self-sufficient. Other than our hired Army, we don’t really have a staff full time. I mean, there are two mechanics that come to tune up the cars every month, a couple ladies who come in to do a deep clean every three months or so, and Jin brings in a couple helpers once in a while when he’s stuck in whatever he’s working on. But that’s only a very few very trusted people. They’re all older locals though who we’ve helped over the years, so we know they won’t betray us. It’s just safer if we keep it low. When we bring in new people, it’s blind like how we did with you. Not that we don’t trust you. I mean…” Taehyung started trying to figure out how to better explain it.
“It’s alright. I understand. I am a stranger to you guys. Despite how many card games I’ve beat you at or coffee dates you take me on.” You smiled as your little joke seemed to ease the tension. “It makes sense really. It’s better to be cautious. If anything happens to me, I wouldn’t be able to say anything even if I could.”
“Hey,” Tae brought his hand to your shoulder, face very serious, “nothing is going to hurt you here. I trust you. Call it my superpower, but I can read people really well. All the years on the street do that to a person. You are a good person. Otherwise, we would have blindfolded you before you stepped out of the car. Everyone agreed to welcome you in our home not just because of all you’ve done for Hyung. We could have just set you up in a safe house if I thought you were up to something.”
You were sure he was being genuine with you. He did seem like he was going very beyond the bare minimum he needed to do had it been some other person. You knew he was trying to make you feel safe and comfortable in this whole situation. They were doing so much for you, you just needed to allow yourself to relax and not think about all the other things. You tried to ignore the dark cloud that kept coming up the second you started to forget their profession and focus on the person.
From the kitchen, you were lead to the outside courtyard. It must have been intended to be a beautiful event space in its conception. There were moss covered statues, an elegant fountain surrounded by ivy covered iron benches, and beautiful plants that brought so much color to the space. Above, there was a façade that looked like a tapered roof covered in ripped tarps that Tae explained let in a lot of light and rain but kept anyone or thing from seeing inside. Bangtan had really thought of everything to keep the Magic Shop secret. Across the courtyard and through another door, you were shown an impressive gym with an attached studio that Taehyung explained was used for combat training, dance practice, or anything they wanted. Next to that was a shower, steam room, and a large indoor swimming pool. All of which was fair game for you to use if you wanted to.
After that, the excited man showed you what he deemed ‘the living space’. Up the stairs to the second floor, there was a massive formal dining room, a small library that you really wanted to explore, a small infirmary, a game room, and some office used for whatever they wanted to work on privately. He pointed to another staircase and mentioned that some of their bedrooms were up on the third floor and so were Namjoon’s and Yoongi’s personal workspaces. Jin’s workspace was in the basement, while Jungkook’s room and personal gaming room was on the attic floor with Taehyung’s art studio. There was so much space in this house that you began to wonder if there was a map so you wouldn’t get lost. Before you could try to remember how to get back to the last room, you found yourself in an expansive living room. You figured this may be where you’d be spending a majority of your time. The room was open design with a massive L-shaped couch that seemed like it could fit more than seven, sleek coffee tables, two elegant armchairs with oversized ottomans, and a few beanbag chairs stacked in a corner. Mounted to the wall was a huge flat screen television and on either side of it where towering shelves full of movies, tv series, music, and video games to last a lifetime. There were multiple gaming consoles stacked neatly on top. And on the far wall, there was a small mini fridge, a cupboard with snacks, and a small bar. It was homely and comfortable.
“We spend a lot of our down time together in here,” Taehyung said, smiling at your awed expression. “It’s probably one of my favorite rooms, besides my bedroom.”
“I can see why. It has pretty much everything in here. It’s bigger than my apartment. Well, this house is so large it’s a wonder how you can find anyone in here. I still haven’t seen Jimin, Jungkook, or Jin. I feel like I could walk right past them in here and never know it.”
“Well, Jin is on the basement level working on something. We won’t need to go down there. There is nothing there that’d interest you. Honestly, it’s a bit more confusing to get down there anyway so just try to stay on the first two floors. But. he’ll come up for lunch in a while. Since I didn’t see Jungkook in here or the gym, my guess is that he is probably still in his room. He was up late last night playing video games and is most likely still sleeping. But if ever in doubt, always start looking for him in the gym or where his games are. As for Jimin, I’m not sure where he is. He was excited for you to come to the Magic Shop. I thought he would meet us in the front or outside. That was his plan anyway. Something might have come up. I’m sure we’ll see him at lunch. Oh yeah, there’s someone else I want you to meet. Now, where is he?”
Suddenly, while you were distracted by some of the framed, less staged photos on the wall, something small and fuzzy ran across your foot. You shrieked and it took everything in your body to keep from kicking at whatever it was as you fell back into one of the armchairs. Taehyung let out a loud laugh that filled the space and had him holding his sides.
“Tannie! There’s my baby boy.” You turned over the chair to watch him stoop over and pick up a small black and brown Pomeranian puppy. The puppy yipped happily and gave his owner sloppy kisses that Tae returned. “I was wondering where you had gotten off too. Such a silly boy. You shouldn’t scare our guest like that. She’s a nice girl, the one I told you about. Say you’re sorry.”
The puppy let out a big yawn. You weren’t sure if that was the apology Taehyung was expecting.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to react like that. I’ve been a bit jumpier than usual. I wasn’t expecting such a tiny thing to come running at me. You guys never mentioned that you had a dog.”
“I didn’t? That doesn’t sound like me. I could have sworn I had talked about him a few times back in the hospital.” If you were honest, he might have. But there were plenty of times when you were fighting your many battles about trusting them that you tuned out most of the conversations. “This is Yeontan. He’s only eight months old. You don’t mind dogs, do you?”
“No, I like all animals. He’s very cute,” you pushed off from the chair and stepped a bit closer. When Taehyung held the small dog out to you, you reached over and lightly scratched him behind his fuzzy ear. Yeontan let out a happy noise and licked your hand. You laugh a bit. “He’s so sweet. But I’ll be honest. I would never have suspected someone like you to have such a tiny dog.”
“Oh, sure. I get that. Jungkookie keeps saying we should get a Doberman as a guard dog. That would definitely fit our image better. But I could never replace Tannie. He’s all mine.” Taehyung hugged the puppy close, and it warmed your heart. “I’ve always wanted a little dog ever since I was a kid. But a bad home life made it difficult. But all the guys pulled together and helped me get this little guy as a present. And I sold a few pieces in order to save up for classes so I could better take care of him. I wanted to be the best owner for him.”
The way that Taehyung spoke and interacted with the dog was such a juxtaposition to the wicked mafia persona you had figured hid beneath. It was so cute that you could only wonder if someone would ever treat you with the same amount of affection. Had you not known about that side of his life, you’d swear he was just this lovable guy with a large heart. Though, something he had said gave you pause.
“Save up? I feel like you all have more money than I can even imagine. I mean,” you made a grand gesture to the room, “why would you need to save up for anything?”
“I’m sure it seems that way. Sure, we’re pretty well off. But when we first started, we were so poor, we didn’t have enough money to eat. We stole from the gas station just to eat once a day. And when we started out, we were nobodies, so it wasn’t like we were making anything. Whatever we did earn from gang activities went to important things like medicine and renting a room for the night, so we didn’t have to sleep on the street. Then, it went towards necessities, like weapons for protection or clothes so we wouldn’t freeze in the winter. Or bail when we got caught by the police. So, to ensure we would be able to make it and not be picked off by the other gangs, we got day jobs. Namjoon worked the gas station we stole from to make it up to the old man who owned it, Yoongi-hyung was a delivery boy, and Hobi-hyung and Jimin worked at a dance studio. Kookie and I found ways to help. The only one who had any money was Jin-hyung. His family was loaded. When I first met Jin-hyung, before I met the others, he was a student, and I was a street kid just trying not to go home. I saw him at a bus stop I used to tag all the time. He said my work was cool and just like a puppy, I started hanging around him. He fed me and even tried to teach me what he was learning since I dropped out. Then we met the others and Jin-hyung was using his money to help us. But when his father learned who he was hanging around, he cut him off. Until he was able to black mail his father.”
“But,” Taehyung continued, seeing how off topic he was getting, “the point was, we always had other ways to get money that weren’t gang related. Even now, as big as we are, we still have little side jobs we do. It breaks up the monotony and gives us a little bit of an escape. What we earn from gang activities belongs to Bangtan; the upkeep of the house, paying Army, hospital bills, and our equipment. Anything we earn from our side hustle is ours for our own pleasure. That dance studio that Jimin and Hobi-hyung worked at, they now own. Jungkookie competes in videogame competitions and films himself playing games on the internet. Jin continues his family business, without his actual family. And Namjoon-hyung and Yoongi-hyung did music underground back in the day before all the gang stuff, and they still do. They write and produce demos and sell them. You’ve probably heard a few of their stuff. And we all help them sometimes. We joke that if we weren’t in this line of work, we’d probably be a world-renowned band. Funny huh?”
Wow, you thought as you tried to process what he had just told you. There is so much more to these guys than I thought. How can they be this down to earth?
“And what do you do?”
“I told you that I used to be a street artist, right? Nothing too special; just tagging and doing funny graffiti. But the others really inspired me to keep going. Hell, Namjoon got arrested with me when I was attempting to improve some offensive street art someone left outside one of our favorite places just because he wanted to see me improve myself. Now, I’ve moved to a bunch of different mediums; I’ve tried charcoal, photography, drawing, and painting. I took all of those pictures,” he said pointing to the walls. “It’s pretty easy to find a muse when you have a great support system. Here let me show you some of my pieces.” He took your hand and led you out of the living room with a bounce in his step.
He took you up the stairs and to his art room. You were fairly positive that this was not supposed to be part of the tour since this was where their more private spaces were. But the look on Tae’s face when he showed you his art room was enough to show you that he was very excited to show off his work to you. The room had hardwood floors and walls covered with different sizes of framed pictures of different famous artists that he admired. The room was loaded with supplies like stacks of canvases, drawing supplies and paints, different cameras, and drop clothes to protect the floor. There was a small couch and chairs that you recognized from some of the family portraits. He went over to a desk and grabbed a book. It was labeled Vante, which you remember used to be his street artist name before he shortened it to V for his gang related work. He flipped through the book and handed it to you when he found what he was looking for. There were pictures of different art pieces he had made. Each page had photos of the progression and the finished product with handwritten notes next to it as to when it was sold and for how much. The numbers made your eyes widen. There were things that you would expect to see in a museum. You were speech-less.
He grabbed your hand once again and led you out of the studio and into the hallway. There were some more pieces hanging throughout the hallways, those he wouldn’t part with. There was one that was so breathtaking; it was a black and gray background, with a single light source from up center. In the center of the spotlight was a dancer clad in white, whose body was carved through shadows and face shown pale in the light, eyes closed in a serene way as if he was lost in the music you couldn’t hear. His arm was extended up to the light like a ballet dancer, so graceful. His hair, a steely blue, and the gathering shadows accentuate his sharp yet delicate features. And the more you looked at it, the more you began to realize that you had seen this person before.
It was Jimin.
As you were led to more art pieces, you started to realize that Taehyung had used Bangtan in many of them. They were breath taking. Not only were they all so good-looking, but the way Taehyung painted or photographed them made them look otherworldly. Near the end of a staircase that would lead to the top floor back to the floor some of their bedrooms could be found on, you found yourself stopped in front of what you came to realize was your favorite. It was a black and white photo made to look like a painting. There were seven people in front of a white background that looked like hands reaching out for each other. Five of the seven were leaning on each other, hunched over in a dramatic way. In the center were the final two, both with their arm up, one reaching for the sky and the other grasping the first wrist afraid to slip and let go. It was so simple yet complex, so artistic. You weren’t sure how long you were staring at it until Taehyung’s voice cut through your thoughts.
“I was commissioned to make this for someone. But when it was done, I couldn’t part with it. The others loved it too. They hated that I was supposed to sell it to someone who wouldn’t understand it. So, Yoongi-hyung paid the commissioner for it, three times what he was going to pay me for it. Said he didn’t care how much the man wanted for it. It meant so much to us that it was priceless. Yoongi-hyung says it’s his favorite. I think it’s yours too.”
“It’s so beautiful. You are truly an amazing artist.”
“I have some great muses.”
Taehyung and you stood there in silence a bit more before the silence was broken by someone coming out of one of the rooms. It was Hoseok. He looked a bit disheveled and breathless as if he had just run a mile, hair no longer sleek and tidy. He closed the door softly and turned with a grin, licking his lips in some sort of victory. He clapped his hands together and started down the hall with a hop in his step.
He froze when he saw the two of you looking at him. “Umm...” he started nervously, “what are you two doing up here?”
Oh right, I’m probably not meant to be up here. That’s why he’s confused. You turned your eyes back to the floor and your shoulders started to hunch. You didn’t want to intrude on their space. You were just following Taehyung and thought it was okay. But it would seem like not everyone was alright with his idea.
Tae noticed the change in your posture and was having none of that, especially after he worked so hard to get you out of your shell to begin with. “I told you I was going to show her around the house. I was showing Y/N some of my artwork in my studio and figured I would show off the good ones. She really likes this one. I can’t say I blame her.”
Hobi looked over at the painting. “Oh yeah, it is pretty. But don’t you have a copy of it in your phone you could have shown her? I thought we were just gonna keep it to the ground floors until Namjoon-.”
“I’m sorry,” you said, arms wrapping around yourself in a nervous way. “I’m not trying to intrude. I wouldn’t have come up here unless Taehyung had brought me.”
Hoseok noticed the way your hand clenched at your clothes and how you didn’t look at him in the face. And suddenly, he felt bad. “Shit, I didn’t mean it like that. I was just surprised. We normally don’t have people up here. I wasn’t expecting you. I don’t care if you come up here. Just as long as you don’t go into any rooms without permission.”
“Well, of course she won’t, hyung. You see how nervous she is just at the thought of intruding. I just didn’t want her sitting in one room all day. Jeez, she’ll probably be hanging on the first two floors anyways. That’s where all the fun is.”
Hobi threw his hands up in defeat. “Alright, Taehyungie, I get it. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean anything by it. Y/N, I’m sorry. I was just surprised. It’s been a long morning.” You nodded your head in confirmation.
“Now to a better point. What were you doing?” Taehyung fixed his hyung with an accusing look and a smirk from behind you. As if I can’t guess.
Hobi frowned back at Taehyung before pushing his hand through his hair to tidy himself back up. “I was making sure Hyung went to rest and not back to work. You know how Yoongi-hyung can be when he’s away from his screens. He took some convincing but he’s asleep now in his room. And I,” he fished a key from the pocket of his jeans, “stole the key to the Genius Lab so he won’t be tempted to sneak in and work. He should be out for a few hours. He may skip lunch for now, but I’ll make sure he eats before he needs to have his next dosage for you.” He smiled brightly at you. “So, what do you think of the Magic Shop?”
“It’s incredible. You guys must have really worked hard to make it so beautiful.”
“Yeah, it took a few years to get right. But it’s been such a great sanctuary for us. Tell you what, I need to go into town for a bit. I’m sure Taehyung has told you about the dance studio if he’s showing off all his side work. I need to pick up Jimin. He apparently was called in this morning to help with some minor things but he’s not feeling too well to drive back alone. But when I get home, I’ll show you something we’ve been working on with the kids in our class. It’s really fun. Then we can all have lunch.” Hobi moved past you two, making sure to greet Tannie with a series of silly voices and pets.
Taehyung gave his hyung a confused look. “Is Minnie okay?”
“Yeah, he’s fine. It’s just about the end of the month. I’m sure he’s gonna try to push it off again.” Realization dawned on Taehyung and he smacked his head for overlooking it with everything going on. You didn’t ask what they meant since it really wasn’t your business. Perhaps it was just some stress related thing that focused on his time of the month. You were sure with everything going on, Bangtan must push themselves too far and that leads to poor health. If Jimin was sick, you would be happy to check him out since you were there to be an in-home care. It would give you something else to focus on. The two said goodbye and Hobi dashed down the stairs.
“Come on, let’s take Tannie out in the courtyard and I’ll show you some more of pieces on the way.
You happily followed him, chasing after the positive feeling you had earlier. Your anxieties had been growing more difficult to contain. It must be because you weren’t taking your medicine. You were hoping Dr. Na would have been helpful in finding out what it was so you could get back on track. But with everything that happened back at the hospital, you hadn’t been so lucky. You didn’t even turn in the script he had given you for a mild antianxiety medication to take in its place because you were still so mad at him and hurt. And yet, here you were with the people who ruined him for you, acting like they were your friend. All these feelings and emotions were confusing.
As you arrived back on the second floor and at the landing of the familiar staircase, you both could hear someone walking around, pacing by the sounds of it. At first, you thought it was Hoseok again, but Namjoon’s voice could be heard just a harsh whisper. Whoever he was talking to, he was not happy about something.
“I can’t believe you are trying to blow me off right now. How is that fair? My family needs security. Didn’t you say it would only take you a few hours? I know I got the dates mixed up but that shouldn’t matter to you. If you haven’t noticed, my family’s been in a bit of chaos recently and you were supposed to help ease some of my tension with information. At least tell me what you do have. What do you mean you aren’t done with your initial check? Why isn’t it done? I’m sure you’re busy, but you owe me!” The closer the two of you got to the stairs, the more you could pick up the frustration in Namjoon’s voice. He walked from a hallway near the bottom of the stairs, phone raised to his ear. He had changed from his morning clothes into a pair of jeans and a blue sweater, something more presentable. He didn’t seem aware of the two of you, so engrossed with his conversation. His eyes were narrow behind his glasses. He was agitated in a way you hadn’t seen since he saved you from Choi the first time. And you were not a fan of seeing him angry. “You said you’d come today and now you’re flaking out on me when I need you? That’s really great, Jackson. No, I am not overreacting. I trusted my gut to a point, but I need hard facts here. I needed them yesterday. Just go with it? Jackson, they’re in my house now, and you’re telling me to go with it?! No, two days is not okay! Don’t make me chase you down, you son of a bitch.” He let out a growl that didn’t fit with his current image. Taehyung didn’t like how mad his leader was getting. The younger knew full well what Namjoon was so angry about and he wished he hadn’t used a flighty character like Jackson to do something Tae could have easily done. But he knew that Namjoon needed an outsider’s opinion. “Fucking fine, how long? You better be here in two days or so help me…,” he let the person on the other end of the phone fill in the blank before he ended the call with a huff.
Taehyung took the opportunity to clear his throat to announce your presence, which startled Joon more than he would have liked. It took him a second before he let his emotions slip back behind the mask of a calm leader you had come to expect. You were aware that Tae was standing closer to you than before, like he was securing your place next to him.
“Everything ok, hyung?”
“Yeah, sorry, didn’t see you there. How much did you hear?”
“Just you getting mad. But don’t worry, it’s all good.” You gather that Taehyung knew exactly what Namjoon was wanting from this Jackson person but didn’t want to explain it to you. He grabbed your hand with his free one and pulled you down the stairs. “Y/N got to meet Tannie. We know how much he doesn’t like new people and, guess what, he likes her. How great is that? He never likes people other than you guys so quickly. He must know she’s a good person.”
You weren’t sure what else that was supposed mean, but it made the wheels in Namjoon’s head start to turn. Was that conversation about you? Did he not trust you in his home? Then why had they discussed bringing you here? He had hesitated back when Taehyung had mentioned showing you around the house. You knew they wanted to be careful, but wasn’t it their idea to bring you in? Why would he be so concerned now? You remember that he was supposed to talk to you about it before bringing you here but had forgotten. Was it more than just easing you into this that he wanted to talk about? Maybe this was a mistake? Or were you just overthinking things again?
“Well, I’m taking Y/N to the courtyard. Don’t let Jackson mess you up. You’re smarter than him anyways. I’m sure you’ll figure it out.”
You started to follow Taehyung back down the hall. As you passed, you could tell that Namjoon was struggling with something. If it was about you, you wanted to tell him that you would do whatever made them more comfortable, even if that meant staying in one place like you wanted to with Hoseok. But Taehyung took your hand again and gave it a squeeze, like he knew you were overthinking things again. “Wait a second,” Namjoon said, voice sounding like he had come to a firm decision.
The two of you stopped and looked back at Bangtan’s leader. He took a deep breath. “Y/N, I’m glad you’re here. And I mean it when I say welcome to our home. This is a bit new for us but considering the circumstances, this is the best option. Jin and I had been talking before about what happens when you come here, and both agree that we want you to be comfortable and not worried about anything. So, that being said, we came to an agreement about something very important. And I’ll let you decide what happens here. I know you said you want us to keep the darker side of our work away from you, and we have tried to respect that as much as possible. Being in our home may make that a bit more challenging. But we are still willing to do that if you want us to. But if you want, this may make being here a whole lot easier and may clear up some of those hesitations about us you may have,”
You were willing to listen to what he had to say. “What is it?”
“Yeah, hyung,” Taehyung said, tentatively, unsure of where this was going. “What do you mean? I don’t think we’ve talked about whatever this is.”
“We haven’t Tae. But Jin-hyung and I talked about it before and based on some gut feelings, this may be for the best for everyone. But it ultimately falls on Y/N to decide. Jin would like to say ‘hello’ to you. He’s in his lab.”
“Lab?” You had heard them mention a lab many times but you didn’t think that’s what it was. But by the way that Taehyung reacted to and, and how he had mentioned how you wouldn’t want to go down there, made you realize this was more than that.
“Namjoon-hyung, are you sure about that?”
He waved Taehyung off. “Like I said, this may make things for you much easier to understand and take some fear of us away. But if you prefer, we can just ignore it fully. But if you are willing, Jin-hyung would like to show you something in his lab. Jin-hyung does a lot of research and is working on something very important that may change how you see us. But it’s important. But if you don’t want to, I’ll understand, and we’ll keep pretending like nothing has changed. I give you control.”
You hadn’t had much control over the life you could remember. Leaving your ex and choosing to help Bangtan was really the first taste of control you had, and it was still scary. Maybe being in the dark was a good option. But them allowing you to have a say really meant a lot to you. The fear of what you would find out started to be outweighed by the prospect of clarity. But what if they were wrong? Was it better to stay in the dark? You started to wring your hands together. You had already started to change your view of them since Yoongi had talked about his past and Taehyung had showed you things you would have never thought you’d come to see from them. Was that enough to trust that Namjoon was doing what he thought was best? Looking into his eyes, you saw only patience as he allowed you time to process all the thoughts and feelings.
You took a deep breath. “I hope this goes the way you planned.”
****************************
As you followed in step behind Namjoon and Taehyung, with Yeontan held comfortably in the younger’s hand, in a darkened tunnel, you were really hoping that this would go the way Namjoon had hoped. They had taken you from the front foyer where you had started and down the same hall that led to the kitchen. You had been so had been so distracted by the pictures on the wall that you hadn’t noticed that there was an arched door to the left just before you reached the end of the hall. Namjoon pressed his thumb against a scanner on the doorknob and the sound of multiple heavy locks snapped open echoed against the walls. The door swung open to a granite stairway that was dimly lit. Namjoon had explained that this used to take guests down to the old train platform before they renovated it. When they had first taken residence, it had been so ill-kempt and dilapidated that they worried the tunnels would collapse. Most of the platforms and tunnels had been sealed and closed off. And a few that were in good condition were converted into something useful. But the biggest had been designated as Jin’s personal work area. At the bottom of the staircase, you could see the old remnants of the old train tunnels and platforms. The tunnel was dimly lit but you could still see the curve of the arched ceiling, the old support beams, the drop off from the platform to the old rail ways. Claustrophobia started to tighten its fingers around your throat, and your fingers tightened around the strap of your bag in some way to ground yourself. You were sure that anyone who had stumbled into here would have found it abandoned and unsafe. Which, in hindsight, was probably what Bangtan wanted. But you reminded yourself that they wouldn’t put you in danger. And this was supposed to help you.
Ahead of you, Taehyung and Namjoon were whispering to each other. You were trying not to eavesdrop, but you did catch that Tae seemed worried about this plan. At least he was trying to keep his promise to you and keep you away from things like this. You really did appreciate that and found yourself believing that he really was your friend here. This was a very big deviation from the plan that the two of you had agreed upon a few weeks ago. But something in the way that you caught Namjoon’s plea for the younger to trust him made you want to believe that this was to make everything better. You understood that this was a very big step for them and something that would probably never be taken into consideration. So, this had mean more than you anticipated. You didn’t want to try to imagine what you were being led to. Could it be a scare tactic to make sure you didn’t talk, or something to bribe you? Neither of those fit with the way that Namjoon had presented the option to come down here and you wanted to believe that Taehyung wouldn’t allow it. You took a deep breath to try to refocus your mind on anything else.
After a bit, as you started to wonder if there was ever an end to this dark tunnel, you could just make out the bricked-up wall that blocked the rest of the way. It was a dead-end, complete with road blockers covered in an inch of dust, caution tape that looked ancient, and crumbling stones. Another façade. Namjoon reached out to one of the broken bricks and pulled it down like it was a lever, which it was, as a door clicked. The door of bricks slid open like some secret passageway in a spy movie revealing a thick wall of steel and a flood of bright light illuminated your shocked face.
You felt like Alice after she fell down the rabbit hole as you stepped from the dark granite onto sterile white tile. How could you still be in the same place? Taehyung had called it a basement workshop and Namjoon had called it a lab, but this was beyond what you could have imagined based on those descriptions. It was like you had stepped into some blockbuster superhero’s hideaway. The lab was large, larger than the pharmaceutical one at Mercy. There seemed to be sections where different projects were being handled. Stainless steel tables were covered with different lab equipment that looked familiar, vials filled with many different liquids and powders, microscopes of varying sizes and usages, chemical analyzers, and centrifuges of the highest quality. On a wall, there were many canisters of different drugs based on the labels you could make out, many of them you had used in the hospital. Two people in white lab coats were noting some results of something in a petri dish that you were sure you didn’t want to know what it was. Looking behind the amount of lab equipment, there was a small medical area that looked like a walk-in clinic you had visited once before coming to Central. There was an exam table, stretcher, enough emergency medical supplies that made you feel like you were back in the ER. If they had all of this at their disposal, they surely didn’t really need you around. You remembered Jin had once mentioned he had medical training and took care of the others, but you assumed it was first aid training and not actual medical training.
On the other side of the room, as clean and as well organized as the lab and medical area, was another workshop that was dedicated to all sorts of different tools and weapons of their trade. There were blueprints for a variety of items pinned to a board with notes and arrows all around them. There were multiple wide touch screens with information and numbers, molds and mockups, knives, guns, and other weapons in different ranges of finishes. You could see three or four dummies that looked as if they had been very well used. One had a vest on with bullet holes in it, another had slashes and stab marks that you dared not think about. Further back, there was what appeared to be a small shooting target lined with thick glass that you assumed was bulletproof to protect the workers. There was another person in a white lab coat and goggles who was working intently on piecing together a handgun. And in the very center of the room, sat a huge computer with four different large, active screens, was Jin. He was dressed sharply, as he always was, complete with a stark white lab coat. A pair of round silver glasses slid down his nose as he scribbled something on a notepad while looked at something dissolving in a yellow liquid. He looked like some handsome yet mad scientist at work. The glow of the screens cast a pale pallor on his skin and you could see a tiredness on his drawn features. Whatever he was working on, he must have been at it for a while, or was stressing him out a bit.
“Did I somehow stumble into the Batcave?”
“Feels like that sometimes. Jin-hyung’s like the Korean Bruce Wayne isn’t he,” Taehyung laughed.
“I think he’d prefer Tony Stark,” Namjoon remarked.
“Aren’t they the same thing,” you asked.
“I’ll ignore that since you’re cute, Darling,” Jin called out, never looking from the liquid in the beaker in his hand. “But there is a preferrable difference.”
Yeontan started squirming in Taehyung’s arms until he was placed on the tile and ran to Jin’s side. The tiny puppy jumped, trying to climb up into his lap, crying out for more attention.
“Aish,” Jin exclaimed, dropping the beaker on the table, thankfully not breaking. “Taehyung why is Yeontan in my lab?! We talked about this.”
“But he missed his Uncle Jin so much,” Taehyung smirked.
Jin rolled his eyes as he scooped up the puppy and made his way over to the three of you. He handed the puppy back to Taehyung after scratching the pup’s tiny head. “Just keep an eye on him. I don’t want to think of what he could get into.” He turned his attention to you, flashing you a warm smile. “Welcome to my lab, Y/N. I’m so glad you decided to join us down here. I promise that you won’t regret it. I was hoping to meet you when you first got here but I’ve been quite busy. I trust Taehyung has shown you the house. Though,” he fixed the younger with a sideways glance, “I see he didn’t show you where to put your stuff down and has made you carry it all this way. I know I have taught you better manners than that.”
“No, he’s been such a good host. I just never set it down. Actually, it’s been nice to hang onto,” you explained, saving Taehyung from whatever tongue lashing he was about to receive. “It gives my nervous hands something to do.”
“Ah, well, we do know a bit about anxiety and habits here. Do whatever you need to feel comfortable.” He dusted off his hands and slipped his glasses into the top pocket of his lab coat.
Up close, Jin looked just as amazing as always. Your hands tightened around the strap of your bag again, just to keep from getting overwhelmed. This was going to be a normal occurrence if they were all going to be here with you. His pink hair was combed back from his face as if he had ran his fingers through it many times while working. He was wearing a white button up shirt with a grey sweater vest, dark trousers, and polished shoes. Somehow, he always looked like he was modeling for something. Though, you did notice a bit of bruising peeking out on his collarbone.
“Are you okay? It looks like you had some issues with CrossFit too.”
Jin looked at you with a look of utter confusion. “CrossFit?”
You nodded. “Yes, Namjoon has one too. He said he got it from doing CrossFit with you. I hope it doesn’t hurt too much.”
Jin’s eye were drawn behind you to his members, who were silently trying to communicate without drawing your attention. Joon was pointing to the mark on his own neck before making a pleading motion with his hands. Taehyung was trying to communicate their intention with his eyes as much as possible.
“Oh yeah,” Jin said, slowly, realization striking him before he slid back into his trained persona so not to arise any suspicion from you. “CrossFit. Right. Well, you know how it goes. He crossed me so I did what I saw fit.” From behind you, Namjoon seemed to choke on air and Taehyung tried his best to stifle a laugh. You turned around to see what was going on, completely confused and clearly missing something. But Jin turned your attention back to him. “Don’t worry about me, Darling. My perfect skin may be marred for the moment but I will survive. But thank you for your concern.”
“Well, it is sort of my job. Though based on what I see, you really don’t need me.”
“Nonsense! You are a professional, and we could definitely use someone with your delicate touch. Whatever you may need, you can just ask. And if I don’t have it, I will get it for you faster than any hospital could. I know many higher ups in all the companies in the country and they would leap at the chance to get in my good graces.”
Suddenly, a loud bang ricocheted off the wall and made you scream and drop your bag, spilling its contents all over the floor. Bangtan only moved from your scream. Jin’s hands came up to grasp your shoulders, steadying you and trying to reassure you of your safety. He bend down so he was able to look into your eyes and whispered assurances that you were alright. From behind Jin, the young man who had been dealing with the handgun had finished piecing it together and fired a shot at the target. He looked over at you with a surprised look on his face, not realizing someone new was in the room. Taehyung had already crossed the room and snatched the gun from the younger’s hands and stowing it away. He gave Soobin a pointed look that spoke volumes. Namjoon had stoop down to start retrieving your bag.
“Soobin,” Jin yelled over his shoulder, “you didn’t think to look up before you shot that? Or at least put a silencer on it?”
“I’m sorry, sir,” the youth replied. “I’m really sorry ma’am.” He scrambled away from the work bench and over to you all to assist Namjoon in locating all of your items.
“I’m sorry, Darling, I really didn’t want something to scare you. My intention was to make this less scary for you. Here, come sit over here. Take a deep breath for me. Taehyung, can you go get her some water? Take another deep breath, Darling. Yes, just like that.”
“This was a mistake,” you said between breaths, alternating between wringing and shaking your hands to try get the tremors to stop. Your voice was cracking as you tried to keep from crying out of sheer panic. “I shouldn’t have agreed to come in here. Why did you think this would be a good idea? What was the point? To scare me into keeping your secrets?
“Absolutely not. We would never want to put you through that. We trust that you won’t say anything. This was to shed some light on what we’re actually doing here.”
Taehyung appeared next to you with a bottle of water, which you graciously took and swallowed half the bottle.
“Hyungs,” he pleaded, “maybe this wasn’t such a good idea after all. We wanted her to be comfortable and she asked us to hide this part of us as much as possible.”
“And we did,” Jin agreed. “Y/N, we tried. And it was easier when it was just going from your place to the hospital and back. But with you being in our house, unless we lock you up in the living room, it’s going to be hard for you not to see some aspect of our work. That’s why Joon and I had this conversation. We thought that after all the time we spent making this relationship with you that you’d trust us enough. And we thought if you saw what we are working on down here, it might clear the air and ease some of these anxieties that still plague you. But we’ve taken an unexpected turn. Just try to relax. You’re still shaking.”
“I wish I had taken Doctor Na’s offer for some new anti-anxiety medication,” you muttered to yourself, remembering his suggestion in the stairwell. You had a feeling your anxieties were just going to get worse.
You looked over as Namjoon came to the desk with your bag, all its contents gathered back inside. All except a familiar clear bottle. Your old medication that you had forgotten was in there since the night Doctor Na had followed you into the stairwell after you saw the exchange of U4-1A. The familiar want you felt then of wanting to down that last pill in the bottle and escape world came back. But you didn’t take it then, you didn’t need it now. You wanted nothing to do with that past life anymore. Hell, you only wanted to know what it was so you could find an alternative that wouldn’t remind you of Daniel. But the temptation was strong as Namjoon held it out for you.
“This is yours, right,” he questioned. “I found it rolled under a table. And it doesn’t look like anything Jin-hyung’s been working on.”
“It’s mine,” you said as you took it from him. “It’s old medication from my ex-…um, I mean, from my accident. I ran out and Doctor Na was trying to figure out what it was since the label’s been lost. But our hospital pharmacy couldn’t identify it. I forgot to clean out my bag with…everything going on.”
“May I?” Jin held out his hand for the bottle. You shrugged, handing it to him. He dumped the pill into his palm and started to examine it with the same focused intensity as he had earlier. He made a face. “A generic white pill with no discernable characteristics. And you don’t remember its name?”
“I don’t remember ever hearing it. I started taking it after I woke up from my accident. The nurse or my ex would just bring it to me. And then, Daniel would get it refilled after that since I couldn’t drive. When I came to Central, I only had what was left in the bottle and had to space it out. I haven’t taken it for a couple weeks now. It’s probably why my anxiety is really bad.”
“I can find out what it is for you. I guarantee I’ll have more success than some basic pharmacist fresh out of school. I’ve some connections I can talk with to help me analyze it. And,” Jin held up a hand to silence the protest you were about to pose, “these connections are not gang related. Before I became estranged from my family, I was the second heir to the largest pharmaceutical company in all the country. Despite my father’s best efforts, I was very friendly and charming with our specialists and made plenty of valuable connections to help me in the future. So, if anyone can figure out what this is, it’s me.”
You were stunned into silence. You remember him mentioning medical training and about his father pushing for a different career, but you never imagined he was a part of the Kim Pharmaceutical dynasty. Of course, you had heard of them; all the hospitals pharmacies in the city were stocked with their products, and every doctor read their research reports and trail information. They beat out every other company when it came to advancements in health services. And they were close to celebrity status amongst the papers. You recalled overhearing some pharmacy interns at lunch talking about them. They mentioned that the company was ran by the Senior Mr. Kim, who had been married twice after his first wife passed, leaving him with two sons to take over the company in the next few decades. The oldest was always showing up in the papers. And the second son was said to be away at some foreign school. Which, now knowing that Jin was the second son, was much better for their publicity than saying ‘a part of the most notorious drug dealing, ruthless Mafia families’. You remembered that night in your apartment when Jin had mentioned blackmailing his father for access to his assets. And, looking around at the lab, it seemed to have paid off well.
As you let the information settle in your mind, you realized that your hands had stopped shaking and your breathing had evened back out. They had successfully distracted you from your panic so your mind could recenter. Well, you recalled, they did say that they had experience with anxiety.
“Come on, Y/N,” Taehyung said, gently, “let’s head back upstairs. We’ll find something normal to distract ourselves until the others are ready for lunch.”
“Alright,” you said with a deep sigh, “but, before I have another panic attack here, what was so important that I had to come down here? Just tell me. Please.”
“Ah, of course,” Jin said, reaching over to a drawer and pulling out a small clear container. Inside, you could see several small, heart -shaped, pink tablets, no bigger than a breath mint. You had seen the news, read the papers, heard the doctors talking about it. That was U4-1A, Euphoria. When the first few cases had started coming into your ER, you were told to check and see if they had those heart-shaped pills on them, though you had never seen them. The distinct pink color was, also, a dead giveaway; it was the same color the user’s irises turned when they were high on the addictively deadly substance. The few times you had been in the room with some of the addicts that Doctor Na was working with, you recalled a rose-colored ring on the edges of their eyes that seemed so unnatural. Your stomach twisted at the thought of Henry taking the drug from Namjoon when he was supposed to be helping people. He couldn’t even deny it. “You know what this is?”
“Why the hell would you show that to me?! I asked for one thing. I could look past some things, try to ignore things. Like I could ignore the amount of money coming and going. I could ignore the weapons, or any other reminders. But I asked specificity for this not be mentioned.”
“Darling,” Jin chided in an amused tone, “I just asked what this was.”
“Are you fucking for real? It’s Euphoria…”
“Wrong,” Jin interrupted as he reached out and tapped you on the nose, completely taking you off guard and disarming you. “This isn’t Euphoria, or U4-1A. This is Euphoric. U4-1C.”
Never heard of that. “Okay. So, what? It’s a knock off?”
Jin looked offended. “A knock off. My dear, like me, it’s an original that others fail to compare to. It is the only one of its kind and so important to the work we do here. And before you insinuate, no, it is not what started this addict epidemic. The ones who have that despicable honor are Ji and the Royals. This” he held it up to you again so you could see it was more closely shaped like a triangle, “is my solution to it. For the past five or six years now, I have been secretly working on a counter agent to make that horrid drug obsolete and save the people who either willing or unwilling were made to take it. This is going to be the antidote. It’s not finished fully. I haven’t been able to fully identify the exact formula the Royals use. And it’s not an instant cure. But introducing this to someone going through withdrawals, instead of to induce a sexual release, the addict would just need to exert themselves another way, like exercise or something else that released the pleasure signal in the brain. It takes a lot of time and constant dosing but I’ve gotten it to where after so long it can be tapered off from every day to once a month, and soon only once every other month. I am making a cure. And we pass it out to those in need. That’s what I wanted you to see. That we aren’t the bad guys. Well… at least not for this.”
You let his words absorb and you felt like you had been doused with cold water. So, when Hwasa cornered Namjoon in the hallway of the hospital and took something from his pocket and mentioned ‘someone will find your kindness absolutely… euphoric’, she was taking an antidote to someone addict to U4-1A? That means…what Namjoon had given Henry, what Henry had used for his patients, what he couldn’t talk about was that he was accepting a possible progressive treatment for the poor souls in the hospital. He was, indeed, a good person. And you had thought the worst of him. Any time he tried to talk to you, you’d run in the other direction. You blocked his number and deleted any trace in your phone. You had thrown away everything because you didn’t want to believe him when he had begged you to trust him.
“Oh my god,” was all you could say as your head fell into your hands. “I have made a total ass of myself.” Was there a chance Henry would listen to your apology after all of that?
“You see,” Taehyung said, “I told you we knew the damage Euphoria does to people. We’ve been trying to fight this.”
“Why didn’t you tell me sooner? Like that night in the car?”
“It’s still a work in progress and a secret,” Namjoon said. “Only a few gangs that have proven trustworthy know we supply it. And they distribute it within their own territory. Or, in the case of your doctor friend, those who did us a great service. We did intimidate him into silence. Which was what you must have seen. Can’t say I blame you for what you thought based on what it looked like. He’d get more if he stayed silent. We don’t want our name attached to it just yet. The Royals already want us dead based on our past with them and our part in the Great War. If they knew what Jin-hyung was doing, it would a bigger target on our backs. But once it’s completely finished, then we’ll openly distribute it to the hospitals and clinics. But we hope that you understand the importance of this secret for us. It’s more than just our lives at risk if the wrong people get word of it. And if Choi already thinks that you’re with us, imagine how much worse it will be when he finds out that we are destroying yet another income for them. Do you understand, Y/N?”
“This whole time, you’ve been doing a great feat and I’ve been so focused on the rumors. You really are the good guys trying to help?”
“We’re really good at hiding ourselves. We’ve had years of practice showing the persona we want people to believe.
“Yeah,” Taehyung said with a cheeky grin, “I mean look at Namjoon-hyung. He puts on a persona that he’s smooth when, in reality, he’s a giant dork who breaks everything he touches.”
“I’ll break you, you fucking brat.”
Jin reached out and knocked both of them upside the head. “Language!”
And you laughed. You laughed without the weight of anxiety or fear weighing you down. For the first time, you felt like you were truly safe.
****************************
The next couple of days went by in a pleasant way, falling into a simple routine that you started to look forward to. One of them would pick you up in the morning, making sure to stop by Holli’s Café for a morning caffeine fix, before taking different ways to the Magic Shop that ensured you were still none-the-wiser as to how to get there. Once there, you would find Yoongi either waiting in the kitchen for you or in the expansive gym where you would start with his rehabilitation exercises after you checked and redressed his wounded shoulder. Now that Yoongi was home, there was a difference from the person at the hospital. He was still quiet but much more open to conversations and approachable. The conversations between the two of you were deep and easy like the ones you had with Amber. And you looked forward to them. There was one time you had made a stupid joke that had made him laugh freely. And that felt like a simple accomplishment that warmed you up. And you couldn’t help but find his laugh adorable. One morning, he brought you to his ‘Genius Lab’. According to the others, it was incredibly rare that he even mentioned his safe haven to outsiders, let alone let them see it. But he had made an exception for you.
The Genius Lab was more like an office where Yoongi spent a good deal of time juggling between work, reflection, and solitude when the world became too much. The space suited his style; grey walls with dark accents and floors, a sleek black desk with three large monitors and computer equipment. Opposite the desk was a long black leather couch that looked quite comfortable. And the room was completely soundproof. When he had brought you into the Genius Lab, he showed off some of his work. You watched as he pulled up different views of various streets all over Central, some storefronts where he pointed out Bangtan’s hired help stationed out front, and the exteriors of the hospital popped up on the screens. You were very thankful that they were still monitoring your workplace. Yoongi tapped on a few keys and different angles of your apartment appeared across the screens, both outside and inside. He played back your morning; Hobi pulling up in a nondescript black car, him swaying to the music in his earpiece as he rode the elevator up, to letting himself into your apartment and waiting for you with Holli’s coffee in his hand. You remembered Taehyung telling you about the cameras they put in your apartment that first morning. While you thought it would be more invasive, you found comfort in his watchfulness.
This morning had started as usual; Jin had come to pick you up this time to bring you to the Magic Shop. The only one you hadn’t seen since arriving at the Magic Shop was Jimin. He hadn’t appeared at lunch the first day as you expected. You shrugged it off, remembering that Hobi had mentioned he hadn’t been feeling well. But you still hadn’t seen or heard from him. The drive over to the Magic Shop was as winding and secretive as always. Though they had started going in a different way. From the street, it looked as if he had pulled up to an abandoned auto mechanic gas station in the lower section of town. At the touch of a button on the dashboard, a spray-painted door rolled open to a dark tunnel that ended at the parking level of the Magic Shop. You wanted to question how the construction worked or how it had remained secret but decided against it.
As you ascended the spiral staircase after Jin, that was where the morning took an unusual turn.
When you stepped into the large front foyer, you were greeted by the sounds of a struggle. Instinctually, you grabbed ahold of Jin’s arm and hid behind his broad shoulders, causing him to chuckle at the cute action. Coming through the front door was a blindfolded man being dragged in by both arms by Yeonjun and another hired staff member. He was yelling all sorts of vulgarities and kicking out in many directions, like he was throwing a tantrum and not trying to escape.
“Motherfucker! I told you to stop manhandling me like this! You know who I am? I will mess you up!”
“Such dramatics,” Jin bemused, “He acts like he hasn’t gone through this before. Yeonjun, did he cause you a lot of trouble?”
“Sir,” Yeonjun snapped to attention, still keeping his captive held tightly. “He tried to give us the slip. We met him at the appointed time but he tried to run. Even tried to jump out of the car.”
Jin tsked. “Jackson, so disappointing. I thought we had a better relationship than that.”
“Jin,” Jackson called out, head snapping in different directions to try and focus on him from behind the blindfold, “buddy, come on. I got the times mixed up and your boy jumped on me. Can we take this stupid blindfold off? I thought we’d be past this.”
“Jackson, you are like a rash; unwanted, hard to deal with, and annoying.”
“Damn, that hurt.” Yeonjun shoved Jackson forward, causing the man to stumble freely. He ripped the blindfold off his face and turned back to the younger, fist clenched. “Fucking punk, I’ll wipe that fucking smile off your prepubescent face!”
“Jackson,” Jin said in a commanding tone that in any other situation would be attractive. Stop it, you mentally screamed. “Refrain from threatening my employee in my home before I let him show you why he’s one of our best. Be a good boy and mind your manners. I’ll go get Namjoon to deal with you. Yeonjun, just make sure he stays here and doesn’t try to slip something into his pocket again. I’ll be right back.” Jackson snorted and rolled his eyes as he straightened himself out. Jin turned around to you, taking your hand and giving it a squeeze. “I’ll be back in a moment, Darling. Don’t worry, Jackson is like a tiny dog; he’s all bark and nothing else, and easy to kick.” Jin’s eye flicked up towards the corner of the room with a sharp look before he turned back to you with a smile. That was weird. “Yoongi-ah should be here soon. Just hang tight and introduce yourself if you want to. And if Jackson does anything ungentlemanly, just tell Yeonjun and he’ll make him regret it.”
Before you could beg to just run upstairs, Jin patted you on the shoulder and disappeared. You had to remember that Bangtan would never leave you in any danger since they were bound to protect you. You remembered hearing Namjoon mention Jackson’s name before and figured they wouldn’t bring someone into their home that was a danger. You looked over to Jackson. The man’s dual toned hair was messy from his struggling. He pulled a pair of sunglasses from his baggy pants pocket and pushed them up onto his head, like a makeshift headband.
Then, he noticed you. And you felt like you were a mouse caught in a snake’s site. A cool smile smoothed across his lips as he made his way over to you.
“Well, look at you. I’ve never seen you around here before. What’s a cute, little thing like you doing here? I’m Jackson. You need anything, I’m the one who will know how and where to find it. Individual contractor. Know-it-all extraordinaire. Master of the Silver Tongues.” He offered his hand out for yours.
“Um, hi, I’m Y/N.” You hesitated to shake his hand.
“So, what are you? You’re too cute to be related to any of them. You look far too meek to be one of us. And I’d hope you have better taste than to be trying to date one of these losers when someone like me exists. I can tell you, you can do better. I’ve known these guys for a long time. Trust me, they’ve got odd taste that would disagree with such a cute mouse like you.”
You retracted your hand. Jackson started to circle you, eyeing you up and down. It wasn’t threatening but you kept your eyes on him. Yeonjun gave you a look but you waved him off for the moment. You could handle yourself.
“I’m a nurse. I’m assisting them after an incident.”
“Ooh a nurse? What luck, I’m in need of some attention after all that rough housing.” He winked. “Oh, shit, wait, you’re the one that ran into the gun fight? And took out one of the Royal’s guys? I heard he’s still recovering from severe concussion. Mad respect, sweetheart.”
“How do you know about that?”
“I make it my business to know things. That’s how I make a living. And why I’m in such demand. Word of what you did has made its rounds through many circuits. Though, I’ll be honest, I’d never be able to put your face to it. And that’s a good thing in this world. Though, if you want to be extra safe from the bad guys, you may want to reconsider who you’re staying with.”
“What do you mean by that?” You turned to follow his eyes as he kept circling you. “Bangtan seems to be taking good care of me. And I don’t mean anything by this, but I haven’t heard anything about you until now.”
“Isn’t that the point? I’m good at staying secret, keeping things secret. And they’re so high profile, it would be easy to find you if they slipped up. There are some things that can’t be bought from me. Like a cute, little mouse. And if I wanted to keep someone safe, I’d make sure no one ever found them. Especially, if they are as interesting as you.”
“I’m interesting?”
“How could you not be? You’re so innocent, so different from all the other people I’ve ever met. You just want to help, didn’t know what you were running into. And now you’re stuck, hiding from the mean world that is trying to punish your good deed. I mean, I’ve been their friend for years and I can’t say I’d run into a fight with Choi to save someone he’s trying to kill. So yeah, you’re the most interesting person in the world. And I’d love to get to know you better. Maybe you’ll let me take you out sometime to prove I’m a better waste of your time.”
“And what makes you think I’d be okay with that?”
“Well, I can give you a hundred reasons to leave these losers behind.” He stopped circling and leaned in so his nose was only a breath away from yours. “But I’m the only one that you need.”
Unbeknownst to Jackson, Yoongi had appeared at the top of the staircase as Jackson started circling you. He watched the interaction with a scowl on his face. He descended the stairs with a ghostly quiet until he was right behind the rogue. You noticed him as Jackson had stopped to lean towards you and your breath caught in your throat. He looked mad, a fierce protectiveness was present in his dark eyes. He appeared at the right moment. Then, you realized. Yoongi had cameras in the Magic shop, he had mentioned it. And the look Jin had given to the wall that you didn’t understand must have been to one of Yoongi’s cameras that he was watching for when you had arrived as he had done before. They were still watching out for you. He stood so close to Jackson that you wondered how the other hadn’t sensed him yet, his face right next to his shoulder and gaze boring a hole in Jackson’s head. Jackson noticed that you were no longer paying him the attention he wanted and turned his eyes towards the directions yours were on. And he jumped as if he had just been electrocuted, putting some distance between him and the death glare he was receiving.
“Fucking hell, you bastard! Put a bell on your fucking neck! Damn, you scared the shit out of me!”
“Good,” Yoongi said as he kept his eyes trained on Jackson. “Leave her alone, Jackson. She’s got enough problems without you trying to weasel your way into her bed.”
“You wound me, Suga. I was just introducing myself to the lucky lady who is now one of the most famous women in our field.”
“I said,” he took a step closer to him, and despite his arm still in a sling, he looked as if he was about to use it on Jackson, “leave her alone.”
“Wow, back down, tiger. Sheesh, didn’t think you’d be so concerned about someone like her. Don’t you have your hands full already? Or are you just greedy? Or are you guys taking turns?”
“Jackson!”
Namjoon’s voice echoed against the walls. You looked up to the second floor where RM was leaning on the banister overlooking the foyer with Jin by his side glaring down at Jackson. RM looked as annoyed as his voice let on. He was all business with no sign of the calm Namjoon you had been seeing around the Magic Shop. With a power that befitted the Leader of Bangtan, he signaled for Suga to stand down and motioned for Jackson to follow him. With a final look and wink from Jackson to you, he flipped Yoongi off and made for the stairs. Suga, silently, watched him go, making mental notes for the future before he reached back and took your hand in his. You jumped, slightly. He hadn’t been physical with you like the others had, holding your hands, giving you a hug or playful shove. There was always a bit of distance, aside from the medical side of things.
“Come on, Y/N. Let’s get out of here.”
He had led you upstairs, asking if you were alright. While Jackson was a lot, it wasn’t something you couldn’t have handled. But you thanked him anyways for stepping in. It felt nice to have someone be so protective of you, something you weren’t so used to. He started leading you up towards the direction of the Genius Lab, where he insisted you stay until Jackson was gone, since it was secure and private, instead of the normal spaces you tended to occupy. Thankfully, the physical therapy you needed to do with Yoongi didn’t require much space and you carried all the equipment you needed in your bag. You figured Yoongi was not a fan of Jackson normally, remembering the disdain in his voice when Joon had mentioned him back at the hospital before. You were sure that Jackson’s display back in the foyer only made that worse and he wanted to keep an eye on when he left.
As you made it to the floor, Yoongi stopped. “I almost forgot. I need to check on something real quick. Can you remember how to get to the Genius Lab?”
“I think so. Do you need help?”
“No. I just need to check on Jimin. I won’t be long.”
“Is he alright? Is he still not feeling well? I can take a look if you need me to. That’s kind of my whole thing.”
He gave your hand a squeeze as a little chuckle sat in his throat. “No, it’s nothing you need to worry about right now. He’s coming down with something but is putting off taking his medicine as long as he can. He’s being stubborn. Gets it from me, probably. I’m just making sure he’s still in his room resting. I’ll only be a moment. I promise. Here, this is my key to the Lab. Let yourself in and lock it. I use my code on the door. Not that I think Jackson will know where my office is but just to be safe.”
Some part of you hated when he let go of your hand to head down the other side of the hall. You had to take a few breaths to let your professional masks fall back into place. You wished your emotions would settle. But being around someone as cute and protective had you feeling a certain way. A way which, you reminded yourself, you shouldn’t be feeling. You were hired to help him heal, not to let a crush develop. You really needed to get a grip. Yet, you couldn’t stop yourself from smiling as you made your way down the hall.
However, after a few steps and turns, you had lied when you thought you could find the Genius Lab on your own. The only places you knew how to get to without much assistance was the kitchen, gym, and the family room. You had only been to the Genuis Lab once and you racked your brain for any distinguishing details that would help you find it again. What picture was near the door? What color was the door? Was the one with frosted glass or was that Taehyung’s art studio? You could just stand still and wait for Yoongi to come back and find you. Or you could text him that you were going to back to the foyer. Or text one of the others for help? Joon was busy with Jackson, and you weren’t sure where Jin went after that. Jimin, of course, was sick and shouldn’t be disturbed. And you wanted Yoongi to focus on Jimin and not you getting lost. You sent a text to Taehyung, hoping he wasn’t too busy to help you with what he was up to in town. You walked further down the hall only to stop and turn around after not recognizing anything.
Wait, was this the same place you had started? Why must this place be so confusing?
Your phone buzzed. You looked down at Taehyung’s text.
TaeTae: I really got to make you a map LOL.
TaeTae: Do you remember how to find the stairs? Get back there and look for your favorite painting of mine. The G.L is two doors down from that.
TaeTae: If you can’t find it, I’m sure he’ll find you with the cameras. Sorry, I’m at a meeting right now.
You could do this. Just find the stairs. Though that was easier said than done now that you had gotten all turned around. You’re sure Taehyung would make a joke out of this if you were ever found. After another turn, you did see a picture that seemed familiar and went down that direction. As you kept walking, you started to hear voices. At least that was a start. Once you found the source, you could orient yourself or ask for help. You followed the voices, and as they got louder, you recognized RM’s tone and regretted your discussion, not wanting to interrupt. That, and you were sure Yoongi didn’t want you near Jackson again so soon. But as you were about to turn back, their conversation caught your attention.
“Haven’t I been super helpful to ya’ll? Who was the one who gave you that info about the Royals showing up?”
“You, also, neglected to tell us that Choi was going to be there. And that is how Suga got hurt.”
“An oversight. That must have changed at the last minute. I can’t be a mind reader.”
“Even though you market yourself as one?”
“Ok, true. But you of all people should know that they don’t do what they say. Regardless, I told you about the Ateez pirates. I said they were up to something interesting. You should trust me by now. I got the information. I may be an independent player in this game, but I like you guys. That’s why I keep my ears open for you. And, I haven’t spilled anything of yours.”
“That’s because I don’t let you get anything worth spilling.”
“Ouch, you wound me, bro. I thought we were closer than that.”
Before you could help yourself, you found yourself stopped outside of Namjoon’s office. The door was barely cracked, but enough for you to see a bit inside. Namjoon’s office was much different from Yoongi’s; it was a large room with warm hardwood against velvety walls that declared power, with bookcases lining the grand walls. Thick hard-covered books filled the shelves like an extensive library. Seated at an opulent and ornate desk in a high wing backed chair was RM, his fingers threaded together and pressed against his lips as he peered sharply at Jackson. Jackson sat relaxed in a smaller, less comfortable chair. They were bathed in the crackling light of a roaring fire from the Victorian style fireplace that sat across from them. This was what you expected of a Mafia leader.
“I don’t appreciate you making my second so upset. He’s supposed to be recovering. Something he wouldn’t have to be doing had you had better information. Maybe I should start going to someone else.”
Jackson scuffed. “As if anyone could do what I do. Besides, I feel like you would have done it by now if there was anyone else. And if that asshole wasn’t so easily riled up he would be fine. I was just saying ‘hello’ to her. And trying to figure her out. She’s quite a surprise Joon.”
“We are trying to keep her safe. That includes from you, Jackson. She’s a civilian who got caught up in the worst way. We just got her to relax around us. I’d thank you to not undo what I’ve been working hard to do.”
“I hear you. Glad you took my advice to just go with it. I told you nothing bad would happen. I mean, what did you just say? ‘She’s a civilian’. I truly doubted she would be any problems.”
“No thanks to you.” Joon leaned further in his chair, his dragon eyes glowing in the fire light. “I’ve been patient, Jackson. More than I should be given what I am dealing with here. Now, you are going to tell me what I asked you to find out for me before I let Suga do what he wanted to do.”
“Damn, for someone who said it’s all business, you’re really pushing it here.”
“Jackson,” you could tell that Namjoon’s patience was wearing thin. What was he so determined to know? Was it something to do with Choi or the Royals?
“Man, look. I can find information about anyone. With just their name, I can tell you if they had late fees from their elementary school library or how many days their mother spent in the hospital recovering from birth.”
“And yet, it has taken you over a week to get back to me. Either you are slipping or you are full of shit.”
“Or you’re dealing with a ghost.” Jackson reached into his coat pocket and pulled out a small notepad. “Everything I found fits on two pages of this little flip pad. Even the most basic civilian fills half of the pages. But this Y/N girl is either that most boring person in the entire world or she’s a ghost.”
Wait, he was here about you? Namjoon was looking for information about you? You thought you had been very open with them about anything they had asked you. He had asked you to trust him, but he didn’t trust you. He had hired Jackson to dig up anything on you that he could. He was nervous when you had first come to the Magic Shop but you thought you had worked past that. Hadn’t the time they had spent with you beforehand been enough to prove that you meant no harm to them or else why would he ask you to come here? You knew you shouldn’t listen to any of this, but you couldn’t move. You sunk to the ground and leaned against the wall, listening.
“What are you talking about?”
Jackson tossed the pad over to him to see for himself. “I mean, this girl has nothing before two years ago. All I could find is that she currently works at Central Mercy as an ER Nurse, she lives in a shitty apartment that’s overpriced for that part of town. Before that, there isn’t much. I found her college she attended for her expedited nursing degree where she got high marks. Her father worked for different police forces as a high up desk jockey, meaning she moved a lot so there isn’t much in regard to early years. But nothing else. Everything starts about two years ago. I was able to find a news article about a car accident that listed her as a passenger, so her amnesia story checks out as far as that. Can’t said I ever heard of someone using amnesia as a cover, but fuck if it wouldn’t be good. Father died and there was no mother listed on any paperwork. Father’s file is just as blank. Just he was basic cop who sat at a desk. After the accident, her only known address was some small studio in her name that was set up by the rehab she was assigned to by some Doctor Sung, who died a year after from a heart attack. Found all his files but it’s nothing interesting. She did some reception job for a clinic before she came here that was a nonprofit for student nurses and that had nothing useful other than what I already had. But that’s all. No ties anywhere, no real records until recently. Either she’s got the most boring, nonspecial life I’ve ever seen, or her life’s been invented by some crazy mastermind. And I’m leaning towards the first one, man. This girl is boring and is nothing in the grand scheme of things. And that’s the truth. The most interesting thing was meeting you guys. She’s harmless. She’s no threat to anyone except maybe herself with that stupid heroic shit. So, you worried for nothing. Your family is safe, just like I said it would be.”
“How can that be all?” Namjoon seemed disappointed. “You’re telling me that there was no other information? How can someone’s life just go back two years? You must have missed something.”
“I don’t miss shit. Listen, I know this isn’t what you want to hear, but that’s all there is. Her old man must have been from some off the grid town beforehand and didn’t leave footprints. She’s a nobody. She’s barely worth the time I spent looking for her. So, stop worrying about her like she’s gonna turn into some problem. And if she does, you can kill her easily enough. Hell, there are seven of you, should be easy.”
You couldn’t stop the gasp that escaped your lips. Namjoon’s eyes snapped towards the door, knowing full well that he had been caught. He rose from the desk and crossed the room, opening the door to find you rooted in place against the wall, eyes cast down with tears welling in the corners. It wasn’t just from the threat of being killed by the people you were supposed to trust, or the harsh words that Jackson had said about you. But it was the fact that you weren’t trusted. You were not granted the same thing he had begged you to do for them. And that hurt just as much.
“Oh shit,” Jackson said with a hint of glee. “Little mouse likes to sneak around, huh? I can see why you didn’t want to trust her. Seems like she’ll get herself killed before too long.”
“Jackson,” RM roared causing you to shrink further into yourself and the tears to flow freely. Namjoon looked down at you, instantly regretting his tone. He had messed up and he knew that. Moving carefully, he held his hand out to you in a silent plea to take it. Feeling like there was no other choice, you let him pull you up to your feet and into his office. Daring to look at his face, you didn’t see anger or any dangerous threat that you feared for your eavesdropping. You saw remorse and sympathy. He led you towards the fireplace where there were two large armchairs facing each other with a side table full of half-read books. He motioned you to sit before he turned back to Jackson. He took out his phone and sent a quick message. Within a moment, Yeonjun appeared in the door. “That’s enough, Jackson. Thank you for your help. But I need to talk to Y/N. Yeonjun will take you back where he found you. You know the drill.”
“Wow, fastest visit ever. Am I at least getting paid?” Namjoon shot him a look that made him jump and scurry over to the door. “Don’t look so sad, sweetheart. I’m sure he isn’t going to kill you. Let me know if you want to take me up on my offer.”
Yeonjun grabbed Jackson by the collar and dragged him out, shutting the door behind him, leaving you alone with Namjoon and the crackling fire. You thought back to when he had saved you when Choi had you cornered in the hospital hall, how good natured he had been with you, how he had been so open with you before he even knew anything more about you. He had been the one pushing for you to trust them and be comfortable with them. He had wanted you to come to the Magic Shop, was planning on telling you before he got busy. But was it all a ruse to get you to follow along? A handkerchief was pushed into your hands and Joon took a seat in the opposite armchair.
“Y/N, I’m sorry you heard that.” He was sorry? Was he going to reprimand you for eavesdropping? Or tell you that all this was a farce that he was going to drop and forget this life debt he kept pushing? “I was hoping to have talked to him before you ever got here. Just for some extra assurance before we moved forward. I didn’t want you to ever hear that. Jackson can say things harsher than he means. I asked him to do a more detailed background check than I had already done, just to ensure I had all the facts.” He flinched when your breath hitch as more tears fell. He started to reach out his hand to try and comfort you but thought better of it. “I promise, I didn’t mean anything by it. I just needed to be completely sure that we were all going to be safe.”
“I wouldn’t have hurt any of you. I can barely handle myself, let alone do anything to you all,” you cried. “Why would I put myself in this situation? I tried to get away from all of this but you kept me here. I would have told you all of that stuff. It’s all I know about myself since the accident. I have nothing to hide from anyone. I promise I have only told you the truth.”
“I know you have. I’m sure you would have told me everything freely. I fucked up. I can’t say I’m sorry enough.”
“Was he right? Are you going to kill me? Because I seem like a made-up person? Because I don’t have a past?”
“No!” Namjoon rose from his seat and knelt down in front of you, finding your eyes and begging for your attention. “I would never do that. I promised to protect you. And I would do that whether you owed us a life debt or not. This life I’ve been living for the past twelve years has made me question so much about people. I’ve been lied to so many times that it fucks up your mind. Bangtan is my family and it’s my responsibility to protect them. When I met you, I instantly felt like I could trust you. I could see that you were a good person. But we had been fooled by someone we thought we could instantly trust before and I got nervous. But the more we spent with you, I knew it was different. But there was this little part of me that still worried. So, I looked into you after that first day. That’s why I introduced us as Bangtan to you. The others agreed because they saw what I saw in you. We've all been jaded by this life but something in you broke through all of our hesitations. We all think you are a good person and that you wouldn’t do anything to hurt us. Once we got you to see what we really were, I thought this would be easier on all fronts.”
“You asked me to trust you but you couldn’t do the same for me?”
“I know. It’s been so long since I could really trust someone. Look at Jackson. Okay, bad example. But I’ve known Jackson almost as long as I’ve known the others. But I still need to keep him at arm’s length or watch what I say around him. It’s different with you. I want to trust you, I do. I just needed to be extra sure that I was doing the right thing. I truly mean that.”
You sat in silence for a long while as your breath evened out and your tears ceased. You could understand his hesitation. How could he be sure that you weren’t lying? It made sense, but hearing Jackson’s words, imagining that’s how they saw you, it was hard. But you had been so back and forth with their trust, too.
“I really wish we could just start over.”
“What do you want to know?” You took a deep breath and leaned back into the armchair. “What else do you need to hear? You want to be sure? Ask away. I only know so much. You guys have asked me to trust you and you told me things that would be helpful. I will try to do the same so we can share a common ground. Maybe one day I’ll know more and I can tell you more. But I can tell you what I can.”
“It’s fine, Y/N. You don’t need to do that. I trust you.” He stood up and moved towards his desk. But you grabbed his hand, steeling yourself to open up as much as you could. He could sense your determination and returned to the armchair. “Just tell me whatever you’re comfortable with.”
“I never really talk about this. It’s hard to talk about. But I can confirm that what Jackson said was all true. It’s actually pretty much all I know for myself. My first actual memory is waking up in a small hospital room in so much pain. There was a man sitting next to me that I didn’t remember. He was my friend, he showed me pictures of us at school. His name was Daniel. I don’t know his last name, I never asked or remembered it. He’s the one who told me about the accident. My father’s car was hit from the side and flipped. He didn’t make it. Daniel spent weeks by my side as I recovered. Dr. Sung was this older doctor who watched over me and helped me recover. Once I was moved to his rehab, Dr. Sung prescribed me all these different treatments but my memories never came back. Daniel brought me my old schoolwork, my old journals, anything that could help me find myself. But there wasn’t much. Jackson said something about us moving a lot. After a year, I could recall little things about places I believe I lived. But there was never anything concrete. No friends or family reached out. Daniel told me that it was just me and dad. He had never heard us talk about anyone else. I guess we didn’t stay long in places. After I was released from the rehab, Daniel and I moved into this small apartment that was far away from everything. The rehab set it up to help me adjust to the world. But I was like a zombie, depressed, broken. After six months, I started trying to get better, start over. Daniel and I started dating, I found a job that was walking distance from my place. All my medical training came back over time. Just not anything else. And that was my life for almost two years. But, almost five months ago, Daniel and I split up and I came to Central to get away from all the unpleasantness. I’d prefer not to go into that if that’s alright. We weren’t good together anymore. Since I’ve been away, I’ve started remembering little flashes of things that don’t make a lot of sense. Amber thinks it’s because I’m away from the trauma. I don’t even know if I want to remember anymore. But if I remember anything more, I promise I’ll tell you once I figure it all out.”
Namjoon reached out and took your hand. “It’s okay. Thank you for sharing that with me. I promise to be more upfront about any questions I have. I trust you.”
How in the actual hell has it been almost a year since i posted a chapter?! I could have sworn it had only been a few months! I cant even described how devastated i was when i saw the date. I CAN'T APOLOGIZE ENOUGH. I know there are people on here that like to remind me that this is just for fun and im under no obligation to post in any set time but ive been on the otherside wondering if the author is still there. If anyone is still with me, i am posting a new chapter soon. For any new readers, know that i am never giving up on this fiction. Im a little slow but i try to make it worth the wait. Please feel free to send me a note, ask for updates on the progress, or just send friendly encouragements. See you soon for the Next chapter.
I’m starting to post Be My Light on my AO3 account, under the same username. I will still post it here. If you want to leave comment or chat on either platform, I’m always open. Thanks to everyone who has liked it so far, I can’t tell you how much it means to me. I’m working on the next chapter and hope to get it out to you as soon as possible.
life has definitely been throwing me a ringer here. Without going into too much details, im having to do an unnecessary treatment plan that is ruining my daily lifestyle just to keep my job of 10 years. Depression and anxiety is high, but im just doing what i can to get through the day.
Though, you're probably checking in on my writing. Its still happening. Slowly but its coming along. I struggle some days to pick it up but im getting there. Ive reread bits and still think about where we're going andbget excited about whats next. Im doing as well as i can with the circumstances. I appreciate the check in. It makes remember why i started writing and how its my happy place. I hope it helps me shake this
GIRLLL!!! I swear I almost passed out while reading the new chapter 🫠Tae’s intense thoughts about the OC shocked me, but at the same time I was so affected—like, woah… I could already guess they were all into her, but hearing it like that was something else skwspwps And the smut was honestly amazing, seriously. I just hope we don’t have to wait another year for the next chapter because I’m really, really curious about what’s coming next🤭
IM SO SORRY. I dont mean to make you all wait so long. Life just interrupts alot and it throws me off my plans. Ill do my very best. I am glad you like it though. I tried to pull from Taehyung’s stage behaviors and really like the idea of him being bratty and domineering when he wants something. Like i said in my note, i have no experience writing this kind of scenes so im glad they came out well
Hi there!
I just love your BE MY LIGHT series! Can you tell me when will the next chapter be coming? Can't wait!!
Hi there anon. Sorry for a late reply. Tumblr doesnt alert me much anymore. Im so happy to see that enjoy Be My Light. It annoys me that its been so long since my last update but i am pleased to say i am almost ready to post the next chapter very soon. It just needs a few more touches and editing. I will post on my page and alert that the new chapter will soon be posted once my editor has. I appreciate the support and feel free to check in again
