[s]he is half of my soul, as the poets say.
when: after “the rise of skywalker” concept: playing with the concept that ben solo is in the world between worlds since he “died” in exegol. writer notes: this is trash drabble. i’m sorry. i was in my feelings for a little. don’t read this.
what happened to him? an answer he wasn’t entirely sure he knew the answer to, but knew it was held within the planet he was last in, the planet he died in, exegol. the man sat up from his resting place, dark eyes flashing around the dark and cold planet, still overwhelmingly tired, the feeling being a constant now, trying to muster up all the energy he could to leave. he knew that there was a way out, there had to be a way out because why else, how else, would palpatine have made it out? long ago thought to be gone, dead, but he was here, plotting, everything, from the very beginning.
my boy, i made snoke. i have been every voice. you have ever heard. inside your head.
he was here. was.
was. he was gone now. defeated and sent back to chaos, the very hell he crawled out from.
rey. rey did that. she did that and he almost lost her — or rather, he did. now, that was. his gaze travelled down to his hands, remembering the brief moment they had together. her hand on his cheek, his lips on her. happiness, for a split second, he felt happiness. he had known what that was and how it felt. how it could be. rey found him, just as he had found her, she found him and pulled him from a darkness that long wrapped around him due to constant manipulation. claimed by the dark and the light at such a young age, unable to be the person, the man, he truly was. the man he could be. unseen. until she saw him. all of him. past the persona he created of kylo ren; that’s why he had to give her back to the universe, back to where she belonged because a universe without rey, it just didn’t make sense. he’d known that for a while. he knew that as kylo ren and he knows that now as ben solo — or whoever he was, still unsure, but he also knew that as along as he was with her, nothing else mattered, and he didn’t really care because wherever she was, that was the right path. that’s why he did it — given the last bit of his life force for her — saved her with no hesitation, because the universe needed her, and he needed her alive, regardless of whether or not he was there.
ben closed his eyes, imagining her, calling out for her. did she feel him in the force? did she know he was still, somehow, here?
rey. he called out, as he had done some many times before. i’m here.
