sometimes, being a fictionkin is a beautiful thing. its discovering new parts of yourself. its self rationalizing. its comforting. its coping. maybe being a fictionkin is the connections you had in your past lives. maybe its being able to relive those connections.
other times, being a fictionkin is a messy thing. its digging up past trauma that you didnt know was hidden. its remembering the details you wished you could forget. its getting emotional over things that you dont understand or how they can hurt you.
maybe its something in between. its nice for a while, and then turns bitter. or maybe it starts out sour, but once the tanginess is over, youre left with a sweet peace only found in acceptance.
being a fictionkin could be about the little unnoticeable things, small glances between loved ones that linger in goodbyes. hugs that no one wanted to pull away from.
it could be about the big things, that huge event from your past life that wont get out of your mind, that no matter what you do, you cant forget it. maybe it was someone who hurt you, maybe it was something you did to yourself, or maybe it was just a matter of circumstance and being at the wrong place at the wrong time.
sometimes its about the senses, the taste of a loved ones cooking after a hard day or the feeling of finally getting to lay down after saving the world, saving your family, saving yourself.
or it can be about the lack of senses, a feeling of floating in an endless void. searching and searching for connection to be real again. maybe you lacked everything, or maybe you were only worried that you did
and maybe, just maybe, being a fictionkin is about REALIZING YOU KIN A FUCKING LITERAL BAG OF BARF FROM BFDI. IM SO DONE WITH THIS
-#✿
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