#bfm woes

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Apparently it's only been 6 months since I dropped out of bfm.

It feels like it's been way longer. I thought it had at least been a year...

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I helped some lady find the turkey basters, and afterward she said, "i used my other baster for a project, and i forgot it's not suitable for turkeys." it took all the power i could muster not to break down laughing as i thought of bfm.

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Remember last year when I had Mars give out candycorn dildos and Mars Bars for Halloween?

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I think the main reason I want to drop my rp characters is because the group is practically dying. I'm tired of putting in an effort to motivate people and attempt to initiate threads and interaction only to have people drop characters, go inactive, or just drop my threads.

I'm tired of trying to no avail. I'm tired of putting in more effort than anyone else.

I've had a good run. I've made a lot of fun and made lots of cool character development not only with my characters, but with other peoples characters. I really want to continue playing these characters I've worked so hard developing, but I'm just tired of exerting myself and not receiving the gratification of threads and interaction in return.

[cakedeficit]

I think I'll stick my roleplay accounts out a little longer.

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I feel like I'm just losing my motivation to roleplay. Like, I love my characters and their headcanons and everything about them, I just kind of feel like dropping them all and doing other things with my spare time.

Like, I really feel I need to take an extended break and focus on school and some of my OC work, and mostly school, but because I'm a mod, and I've had most of the characters for so long, and they're so closely intertwined with other characters, I just feel like it's become more of an obligation than a hobby.

I suppose it's a good thing I'm not feeling anxiety about this, but...idk I don't really feel anything when I think about dropping all of my characters and withdrawing as a mod. I actually think I might feel relieved if I just dropped them all. But...I also feel like I'd be letting people down, and I don't like being in that position...

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I should probably reply to N, but my Ariana muse has decided to take a nap.

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Bless you blog archives. I found the post easily. Eheheh, hopefully Proton is versed in how to remove blood stains, because he's going to have a LOT of work to do.