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Blade Braxton (1975-2021)

It's kind of a minor thing in the world of pro wrestling, but Wrestlecrap.com's Blade Braxton passed away on March 28. I heard the news that night and didn't know how to react. The site's big April Fools' Day podcast was coming up, and I found myself hoping it was a tasteless joke. But despite Blade's flair for tasteless jokes, this sadly was not one of them. His family has scheduled the funeral for April 10.

When I first heard of Wrestlecrap in 2000, it was because of another tragedy for the site--the death of Merle Vincent Griggs, who founded the site with RD Reynolds. I loved the idea of a website reminiscing about dumb pro wrestling gimmicks, and yet it always seemed sad that RD ended up having to carry the torch without a guy who clearly meant a lot to him. Before long, though, Blade stood out in a Wrestlecrap contest where he filmed a spoof of the Black Scorpion, and he became a prominent contributor. By the time RD and Blade launched Wrestlecrap Radio, I'd decided that it was a elegant bit of karma that RD had found a new friend and kindred spirit. I can't imagine what it's like for him to have to suffer this sort of loss a second time.

Wrestlecrap Radio was definitely not for everyone, and that was mainly because of Blade. His humor was crude, vulgar, and sometimes inexcusably offensive. He tended to ramble and get off-track, and he had less to say about pro wrestling than odd anecdotes from his weird life. I always got the feeling he was from the wrong side of the tracks, although that may have just been the way his phone connection made him sound like, as RD put it, a hobo. He wouldn't have been out of place in Beavis & Butt-Head, and he'd probably be selling them old Skinemax VHS tapes behind a food mart.

I frequently found myself worrying about Blade's state of mind. As the show went on he always seemed to be drinking his way through some injury sustained while installing hardwood floors. Whenever the show skipped a few weeks/months, the reason always seemed to be that Blade wasn't ready. He was always talking up big plans or bigger ideas that never came to pass. Every once in a while he'd tease that he would finally pay off the Big Announcement he hyped in 2007, and every single time I'd get sucked in until he postponed it yet again. He had a massive collection of old shit from the 80s that he couldn't bring himself to get rid of, which seemed sadder and sadder as I started to leave my own nostalgia behind.

When he wasn't installing floors or doing Wrestlecrap, Blade was always driving around the country working rinky-dink indy wrestling shows or attending horror movie conventions. I didn't see any future in it, and I didn't envy that sort of life. But he seemed to revel in it, and it was nice to hear about him landing a midnight movie show on some local station, or getting parts in low-budget Troma movies. He seemed like he lived twice as hard as the average person. Now that he's gone at only 46, I suppose it was only fitting.

Wrestlecrap Radio kind of jumped the shark for me around 2012 or so. RD was increasingly bothered by the saltiness of the content, and the podcast was relaunched in a more PG-13 format. I'd listen to it now and then, but updates were infrequent and it was easy to fall out of the habit. I made an extra effort to catch the Christmas episodes, but they were always griping about the new Star Wars movies, which led them to gripe about the old Star Wars movies, and so on. The magic just wasn't there anymore. But I always figured there'd be plenty of time to catch up with them later. It wasn't like they were ever going away...

I'm sure RD will bounce back from all this, and maybe he'll find a way to keep podcasting. Maybe he'll find someone else to be on the other end of the tin can and string. RD is a fine young egg. But there will never be another Blade Braxton, and I'm fortunate to be one of the people who can go on to assure people that, yes, this lunatic was a real guy who really did all that shit.

If there's any justice in the world, someone will do a version of that picture of Randy Savage greeting the Ultimate Warrior in heaven, except with Blade asking Savage about the boner he had at Summerslam 1988.

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