Renji Fashion Roundup, The Conclusion
It is time for the third and final installments of the Renji Fashion Round-up! (Part 1 | Part 2). This segment will cover things he wore in Openings and Endings, which are now available as hi-res compilations on Youtube, thanks CrunchyRoll! Unfortunately, at some point, I lost count of which numbers they were, particularly the endings, so I am sorry if this is not as well-referenced as some of my other research projects.
Also, the original request asked me to go from worst to best, and the first two followed that pattern, but I’m going the other way for this one, because I don’t want anyone with a weak heart to get clobbered with the monstrosity that’s hiding at the bottom of this post. You’ve been warned.
1. No one should be surprised. I love this hat from OP5. I love this hat so much I drew a picture of it and it’s my icon on AO3. I made a vague allusion to it in a fanfic once. I am always trying to get people to draw more toque Renji fanart. It’s the best. I love it. A+++++.
2. This is pretty standard Living World Renji, as we have established in part 2. He’s got a jacket, he’s got some excellent boots. I’m not sure I like what’s going on with those pants, but it’s hardly the worst ones he’s ever worn. The kicker here is that this is the ska ending, and Renji is definitely 3000% more excited to be here than anyone else, which has led me to believe that Renji definitely owns some checkerboard Vans and has tried to play the trombone at least once.
3. A trenchcoat! A trenchcoat over a hoodie! What is even going on here? I am very fond of his bandana here, and that is a pretty good hoodie, that’s the only reason this got ranked so high. He’s probably wearing, like, cargo shorts, or something, ruining everything.
4. Ha ha, how did that Menos rate getting added to this montage? Anyway, that’s a pretty sexy shirt, but I do not know what’s going on with that head wrap. Is he having a spa day? I think this is definitely a shot from a yoga retreat he went on once with Isane and Yumichika.
5. Everyone had one variations of this outfit in this ED and I am extremely sorry to say that almost everyone else looked worse, especially Ishida. But this is not an Ishida fashion round up. Pros: Renji looks good in purple. I like this braid + spikes deal. Good bandana game. Cons: Necklace made of teeth. Giant belt buckle. Popped collar. Once again, necklace made of teeth.
6. I didn’t like the satin jacket he wore to the BBQ in the Reigei arc and I don’t like this one, either. I like the idea of Renji in a henley very much, but I either want to see it by itself or with a flannel overshirt because my sexuality was establlished in the late nineties, let us move on before this gets weird.
7. So, I was doing this super late at night, and I was getting on toward the end of this 40-minute long ED compilation, and I’m thinking, eh, are there really going to be any more outfits in this? And then I was clobbered in the face with THIS:
So, those are NOT his colors, and that bandana is a war crime. Wallet chain again. Those are actually pretty good shoes, but they are utterly inappropriate for skateboarding. Also, let’s get real, Renji has never been on a skateboard, Renji would be a disaster on a skateboard. The fact that he is skateboarding with Keigo and Mizuiro is icing on the cake. This has such a “Hey, fellow kids!” vibe. I feel like this is a scene from an anxiety dream Ichigo is having.
8. So, after I recovered from the skateboarding pic, I determined that it was not as bad as my old nemesis, Renji’s striped cargo pants from OP4. Long-time readers will remember when I had to use a frame-by-frame viewer to determine that they were not in fact thigh boots and bootie shorts (I am still kinda disappointed, tbh). If I got a three wishes from a genie, I would probably waste one of them on finding out what this looks like from the front. The rest of the outfit is probably fine, but those pants are a huge deduction. I tried to draw this outfit once.
9. Dying in infinitely slow time like Kurotsuchi did to Szayelaporro
1,000,000+. So, remember when I said I saw that skateboard picture and recoiled? Well, 30 seconds later this happened, and my soul left my body. Here it is: The Worst Thing Renji Has Ever Put On His Body. I am dead now. I died for you, readers. Goodbye forever.