Corporate leather: a cellular love story
So I got an iPhone. The guy at the verizon store told me it'd take two hours to transfer my sexy pictures from phone to iPhone. I went home and put them on my computer in less than a minute.He also told me how to so THAT incorrectly. Behind me, on a black leather Verizon couch, a young man showed off Siri to a woman his grandmother's age. She was "mind-boggled." But she kept talking about her husband or son or whoever. But the Verizon rep kept asking Siri to tell him when the braves play, to do tough sums like seven and fourteen, to use GPS to tell him where he is, to read off seduction techniques, and to give him a blowjob. It was all too much for her. "Do I really need all that?" she asked playfully. "He might like the oral sex part..." she said ambivalently. "He always likes to watch those ball games on tv," she said with certainty. "He could use a new GPS," she said selfishly. The Verizon rep put his arm around the old women and whispered into her ear, "That's not all Siri can do...." Her eyes widened, and her heart rate increased. I was uncomfortably close to them at this point. The detail in this story is too crucial to have risked anything like distant eavesdropping. "Come with me to the back, and I'll show you more than you could ever imagine," he said, leading her through a back door. Two heavy set reps held me back as I screamed for permission to this unimaginable backdoor Verizon love-chamber. When they threw me out the front door, I remembered I just got an iPhone, so I downloaded tumblr and forgot it ever happened.