#blue vent

[imtoobiforthisshit]

i dont even know if the fact that i cant study is the anxiety, the adhd, the depression, all of the above? but i know that im becoming absolutely insane

[imtoobiforthisshit]

I think remembering trauma has to be one of the worst thing in my life, like why am I having a panic attack about something I just remember happened almost 8 years ago

My brain forget traumas but when it remembers it loves being a bitch about it

[imtoobiforthisshit]

ive a headache, my period started, i almost didnt sleep last night, ive so much work to do for next week, im frustrated, today there was a pride parade and i couldnt go, ahhhhh nothing is fine im gonna scream

[imtoobiforthisshit]

realizing how many times my bestfriend failed to invite me to stuff because 'I forgot to tell you' 'I didn't think you'd want to come' or just not even realizing that I'm sad they didn't invite me even if I tell them makes me think that maybe I'm the only one really caring at this point

[imtoobiforthisshit]

im so tired of gender i don't understand I'm so lost I don't know who I am anymore

[imtoobiforthisshit]

I was supposed to see my bestfriend and our friend tomorrow and I was so so happy about it BUT THEN I GET SICK, A FEVER???

so yeah I can't go because their exams are soon and we were gonna go shopping for their prom and all

I'm so sad now

[imtoobiforthisshit]

the way im genuinely thinking about just not going to the 2 next days of exams, but I know I'll regret not going more than going like I don't have the energy to study for them, or to do them, but i prefer burning myself out, than not trying

im just so tired