#blunderlands

[chainsawgirlfriend]

his name is Lunchtime he is 4 years old he CANNOT read and he has an older sister named Breakfast

[commoninfected]

Bark-0

dogy

[chainsawgirlfriend]

Pictured: the flatypus, crying cuz he dropped his mint (left), the flatypus, relieved to have its mint back (right)

So thin they cannot move, the flatypus relies on the kindness of strangers to put unrolled fruit rollups, or singular peppermints, into its mouth to sustain it. Due to having completely collapsed organs, and burning like 2 calories daily, this small contribution can keep it well fed and as healthy as this miserable beast could be for months. However, should it not receive the charity of passerby, the flatypus will slowly wither and die.

[chainsawgirlfriend]

Woodle

Stats:

Makes accordion noises when it inches

Cries maple syrup

Chunky in the middle

Has wet hands

Clammy. At least a little sticky. His back feels like a piece of ham.

Smells like strawberry milk and microwaved frozen waffles

Makes the most pathetic and unseemly noises

[chainsawgirlfriend]

Slime Time

AKA. Mr. Time

He's a slippery little newt that can control bubbles of spacetime dimension. He smells like oranges and socks. He is upsettingly moist. When he runs it sounds like someone throwing Flubber at a wall. If tossed, he would bounce.

Older than dirt and twice as tasty.

[chainsawgirlfriend]

Squeeby

The elephant foot's idiot little brother. He's a stupid little blob with cat ears. He glows in the dark. You won't die if you stand near him but you DEFINITELY won't be able to have kids later. If you pet him he will jiggle. No bones in this bad bitch. You could safely power most economy cars with him if you popped him under the hood instead of a battery.

He can count to four, absolutely cannot cross the street without supervision, and doesn't know where Denmark is.

[commoninfected]

Headers for Toyhouse, Part 5

[chainsawgirlfriend]

Also here is Jitters my cat Jitters. He glows in the dark (not shown.)