A list of things written haphazardly with the papers of the notebook smelling like alcohol, with echoed wisps of laughter, done over good company, fantasizing beautiful what ifs, and then somewhere along the way, it was later completed alone, nothing but faint tear stains for company and forever tucked away indefinitely, not a list to be revisited unless he wanted to wallow in the impossibles.
crack the code and solve the mystery to dark matter & dark energy
survive long enough to witness astroid apophis and comet 15p/finlay
win a shooting match against Oscar (definitively)
backpack around the world
be less tone deaf - Sher help
visit Belize again with Linds, but for a holiday this time
finally have a bumble match (Ria wrote this and won't let me remove it)
3D-print something cool (or stupid) with Mal
drag Eric into an ice bath with me
learn to paint a painting to paint a gift back to Ruth
have an ice hockey match, one last time
or just ice skate, one last time
successfully make Val's shotgun sling
properly learn and memorize by heart to make mom's blueberry crumble pie (ps: ask Charlie to reteach me, recipe is with her)
learn astrophotography again from Ziggy
have Thanksgiving/Christmas dinner with mom and the Roses, like good old times.
grow and have watermelons with Beau
. . .
create a detailed log of the happenings in New York since Day 0 for historical purposes.
fall in love_ ..fall in love *words crossed out, scribbled over, rewrote, and hesitantly crossed out again being continuing* stop being scared of love
tell Jer, and let him decide
fix that friendship if it gets ruined
tell mom I love her. and thank you
visit and clean dad's grave at least one last time - bring his favorite flowers and beer
open up the marines box for the first time, face the past
survive long enough to witness the next day
just one more day. into the next. don't give up on us just yet, please.
don't die, remember that some people will get sad
tell the people i love, i love you and i'm sorry
and make sure to keep them alive, no matter what