FOUR TIMES THE RECEIVER NOTICED THE SENDER. @boatdriinks
𝐎𝐍𝐄 ... '𝙛𝙪𝙘𝙠 𝙢𝙚, 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙮 𝙬𝙚𝙧𝙚 𝙡𝙤𝙪𝙙 ' an interesting greeting, one which inspired a smile and ushered in the hug warm enough to break the ice. in rachel's new life, the one she had thrown herself into head first without so much as a second thought or worry about what would need to be given up in return, there was very little time for things like friendship and nights out ── but on the night in question she'd made the time. carved it out of the universe using sheer will when the invitation to meet a few old friends was thrown her way. she'd missed out on the start of the night, the main event as it were, but as she stood shoulder to shoulder with the friends she'd so desperately missed, smiling along as they told her about the shitty little local band they'd just heard play and making plans for the rest of the night, it felt to her like no time had passed at all. they were still who they'd always been, and she was still herself. nothing, and no one, would ever change that. ( attention wavered momentarily, gaze lingering on the alley in which staff and talent came and went. a glimpse of leather and red, dark hair disappearing from view in an instant. for a moment he, whoever he was, was far more interesting than whatever it was her friends were yammering about, but once out of view rogue managed to snap back into her role: rachel. just for the night. )
𝐓𝐖𝐎 ... his voice clear, but seemingly far away - heard through the crack left open when bedroom door didn't properly click shut. still in the haze of being half awake rogue was only distinctly aware of a few things ; the musky and familiar scent coming from the sheets beneath her. the fan above circulating cool air across her bare chest. warmth from the california sun beginning to overtake that cool air as mid-morning turned to late afternoon. and him. kerry. beyond the bedroom, talking to someone with all of the animation she'd come to expect. eventually she would have to make her exit, her completely shame-free walk of shame ... but before such a time came to pass rogue would listen to his voice, really listen, in a way she hadn't before. she would memorize tone and timbre. imagine his face as words were said ; a smile or a grimace, rolling eyes or a pout of annoyance. the gruff but not unpleasant edge she'd never noticed before. although they were completely apart, in different rooms even, it felt to rogue like the most time they'd ever spent together. he would hate it, she thought, the moments of congeniality she was stealing - but that only served to make it all the more satisfying. gaze on the ceiling, fan whirring above ... she would stay just a little longer.
𝐓𝐇𝐑𝐄𝐄 ... he was beautiful. once noticed, the sooner she accepted it as fact, tried to stop convincing herself otherwise, the sooner things would be much easier. he was beautiful, charismatic, and important. the most important person, actually. her most important person's most important person. and to have her most important person's most important person be not only beautiful and charismatic, but also, in rogue's mind, after more than just friendship with her most important person? ... well, it was enough to make a girl feel a little insecure ─ because she'd seen them together, and in truth wouldn't blame her most important person for making the switch if he so chose. there was history there. years and jokes and trauma and each other. it wasn't the sort of thing she could compete with, nor would she have wanted to ; because in the end his beauty, and charisma, and importance deserved to be acknowledged ... even if she did, in a way, regret having noticed it in the first place.
𝐅𝐎𝐔𝐑 ... in a way it felt like ( funnily, annoyingly ) infidelity, or at the very least like a thought she shouldn't allow herself to have ; but watching him on stage for the first time in ... longer than rogue was willing to think about, one thing was clear ; kerry had been the frontman all along. he was ... so good. electric. magnetic. an undeniable talent who could pull you in and make those noisy hours feel like the blink of an eye. maybe it was only something one could truly see when floating amongst the stars ( the palace really did make you feel alive in the dead of space, they weren't lying about that ) but no matter the reason, as rogue watched him do what he'd done so many times before, she was grateful to finally see him like others did ; not as pushy baby kerry, but as a man who had more than earned his accolades, and his place among legends.
