#brevettilldig

[brevettilldig]

[brevettilldig]

Till dig

I didn't know anything about you til i was seven when I found out that my father I grew up with wasn't my actual father. I remember how we three sat around the kitchen table when my mother tried to explain to me about you.  I was too young to understand the situation all i knew at that point was that I had another dad and that I wanted to meet you. 

So I started writing you letters, I begged my mom to let me do it and my letters were filled with hope and with lots of questions like:what you looked like,what foods you like, what your favorite color is, who my grandmother and grandfather was and what they looked like. Questions like that. 

Your response to my letters were short and in cohesive and you didn't answer most of my questions. I was confused and sad. One day you called me and my mother let you speak to me. You were just as strange and in cohesive as in you letters and my mother had to take the phone away from me and she yelled at you and hung up on you. I don't remember what you said to me maybe I blocked the entire conversation erased it. 

After that the letters stopped coming and I've had to puzzel the pieces of you together with the things my mother has mentioned about you. I'm so fucking angry at you for what you've done to my mother and to me. You seem like a fucking asshole maybe your insane or maybe you abusive drugs or alcohol all i know now is that I don't want anything to do with you. Even though I'm sort of still waiting for you to call me. I feel confused. And I*m scared of you.

And I really want to hear from the rest of my family, I know I have a sister. And i really wished that me and her had contact. I don't know if she knows about me!

Have you even told anyone about me?

Do you think of me?

What is wrong with you?

Where are you?

//me

[brevettilldig]

Deadbeat dad

To My Paternal DNA/"Daddy",

I've never met you. Hell, I don't even know your name. I have some concept of you might be, a few of my mother's boyfriends, people she has mentioned in passing. Maybe you were just a rapist, I don't know. Nobody talks about you here, you don't really "exist" to me.

I like to fantasize about who you may be, and I'm sure the fantasy is better than the reality. I could probably snoop a bit, dig that box of papers out of the attic and try to figure it out. But I don't want to know who you are. It would make it too concrete.

There are a lot of secrets in my family. They like to say my grandfather is dead but he's not. My guess is he was an abusive asshole and they fled. Seem to be a lot of shitty men in my life, reoccurring theme it seems. My mother's husband is a Grade A ass and my aunt's ex beat her.

But I've been loved, not by many, but I have my grandmother and that's good enough for me. I wonder what you're like sometimes. Are you smart? Attractive? "Kind"? Do you have a wife now, kids? My guess is you're some kind of bum, but hey, look at me. I turned out alright.

You should probably know that I made it without you. Your genetics haven't limited me, I've consistently scored in the 99+% my entire life. Most people would describe me as pretty, despite my home life I've managed to stay mentally stable. Soon I will be off to college, and a good one at that.

So here's to me, the daughter you never met. Maybe one day I'll walk by you on the street, or if you have kids, maybe one of them will track me down. But if I never meet you, if I never hear your name- so be it, and may you rot in hell.

Signed, Your Baby

[brevettilldig]

[brevettilldig]

Brevet till dig

Hej!!

Jag håller på med ett konstprojekt som handlar om människor som inte träffat båda sina biologiska föräldrar, där en eller båda valt att inte vara delaktig i ens uppväxt och liv. 

 Jag skulle bli jätte glad om ni som varit med om detta skulle vilja hjälpa mig med projektet genom att vara med och bidra med ett brev som är riktat till den personen/personerna ni inte träffat.

 I brevet får du helt fria tyglar att skriva vad du vill till din biologiska förälder. Brevet kan tex innehålla en mängd frågor till personen, historier från din barndom och ditt liv, glada eller arga tankar, teckningar eller bilder. Vad du själv vill helt enkelt. Tyvärr kan jag inte ge ersättning/pengar. 

Syftet och förhoppningen med projektet är att jag ska samla in tillräckligt många brev för att kunna visa upp likheter och olikheter kring människor med liknande erfarenhet och göra ett projekt där andra kan relatera. Tanken är att jag ska trycka en bok. 

För att delta/fråga frågor skicka ett mail till mig på [email protected] tack på förhand //Jessica Sundqvist

[brevettilldig]

Hi!

I’m doing an art project around the subject of growing up without having both biological parents around.Where one or both of them choose to leave.

I’d be so happy if you could help me by writing me a letter that is written for your biological parent/parents that you haven’t met or met rarely and send it to me at [email protected] or if you’d prefer uploading a post on tumblr with the tag brevettilldig.

 In your letter you can write what you want, it can be packed with questions, stories from your childhood and life, pictures, you could draw something, it can be happy and it can be angry. You can be completely anonymous if you want to. 

Unfortunately I can not pay you anything but I’d deeply appreciate your help. Thank you in advance//Jessica