#bslbodyimage

[bigsisterlita]

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* B’s GUIDANCE *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧ 1️⃣ Lots of changing will take place in your body for the next few years. Whatever you end up with, you should be satisfied with or accepting of. Some girls have a difficult time doing so. We all have an ideal image of what we want to look like. Sometimes, we don't fit it - when you look at your developing stage, you don't like what you see. That can be normal as your body is growing and shaping and figuring itself out. 2️⃣ Thick thighs are usually a genetic thing you inherit from family. Large calves can be natural for women. Its common for a growing girl to have thighs that are a tad bit bigger than the rest of the body. It doesn't mean you’re fat. 3️⃣ It isn't bad you are “obsessing” over this, but if it’s truly the case, it's not good, either. I honestly think you have nothing to worry about. You will most likely have different thighs by the time you are finished going through puberty. ~ 🅱️ (credit to Sophia)

[bigsisterlita]

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* B’s GUIDANCE *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧ 1️⃣ He made it clear he only wants nudes and refuses to get to know the real you so leave it at that. There's no need to exploit your body (and humiliate yourself) in order for him to start a simple conversation with you. You two aren’t on the same page and it's best you talk with someone who is. Props to you for protecting yourself. You shouldn't feel obligated to exploit your body just to keep him "happy" down there because then, you’re not happy. 2️⃣ If you're uncomfortable about sending explicit photos, don't be afraid to address that! As “friends,” you should be able to voice your concerns, especially without fear of judgement or manipulation. Once you tell him, make sure he doesn’t guilt trip you into any nasty behavior. Chances are, if he continues to beg for it, he cares more about your body than yourself. ~ 🅱️

[bigsisterlita]

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* B’s GUIDANCE *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧ ℹ️ You came to the right person. I, too, have natural hair but in a kinky curly state which is very hard to manage but I love my hair more than anything and will take my time to treat it at it's natural state. Let me give you some info on curly/natural hair 💇🏾 1️⃣ DETANGLING: ☑️Use a cream based detangler all over your hair to soften the tangles (ex: Knot Today) ☑️ALWAYS use your fingers when detangling to avoid painful tugs and breaks ☑️Use a comb after tangles are out to ensure theres no knotting. ☑️Comb from ENDS to ROOT. ☑️Detangle before shampooing, during shampoo, during deep conditioning and after - WASHING: ☑️Use cold water to close hair cuticles to keep in natural oils ☑️ALWAYS deep condition as it helps strenghten hair strands, softens hair, and reduces tangling for healthier hair ☑️Use a t-shirt instead of a towel to dry your hair to prevent frizz 💨 2️⃣ STYLING: ☑️Always use a leave in conditioner to reduce frizz and keep the hair retained ☑️Use a styling cream or gel to define your curls for wearing it down ☑️Use a moisturizer daily to keep it from drying out ☑️Twisting or braiding it overnight helps stretch it out and gives you a new style!! If you're black or hispanic, I recommend using Carol's Daughter products although it does work for all races and hair types. I guarantee if you tell your mother all this information and let her know what kind of products you wanna use along with you learning out to manage your hair, I bet she'll let you do it yourself 💪 3️⃣ The more you learn about your hair, the more you'll start to love it. I hated the texture of my hair but I learned that everyone has different textures and curly hair is definitely beautiful once you learn how to take care of it. Embrace your hair texture, it's absolutely beautiful ~ 🅱️

[bigsisterlita]

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* B’s GUIDANCE *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧ 1️⃣ ─ STOP COMPARING: ► When you do this, you’ll learn to become comfortable with yourself. You will not receive confidence from comparison-only vulnerability, lower self-esteem, envy, etc. ► There’ll always be someone more “attractive", smarter, or mature than you and you’re always gonna be that someone to others but there won't be another you! Someone’s beauty isn’t an absence of your own. ► It’s important to create/live up to your own standards as you know what your capabilities and limit rather than someone else's. Following someone else's lifestyle is unnecessary when you have your own. 2️⃣ ─ ACCEPT YOURSELF: ► Enhance the things you do have and accept the things you don't. You’ll learn to be grateful for what you have which is a genuine factor of happiness. ► Others have things you don't and you vice versa. Don’t go outta your way to get what they have, work with what you've got! ► It’ll be an amazing feeling to know only you can master something or pull it off. You won't have to imitate someone if you have your own way of achieving things that make you feel rewarded. 3️⃣ ─ TRIAL & ERROR: ► Discovering things that work for you to feel self-assured takes time/patience but it's crucial to your wellbeing. Step out of your comfort zone and try new things to achieve faster results. It's frightening but you'll feel accomplished for challenging yourself. ► You're good at something in the world but finding it means pursuing adventure. 4️⃣ ─ I AM/DO STATEMENTS: ► When someone compliments you, agree. Someone compliments your smile; "Damn right I have a great smile!" Convince yourself and learn to agree wholeheartedly without a doubt. Others don’t provide compliments unless there's a little truth behind it so take it for what it is. 5️⃣ ─ TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF: ► The more you do, the more you fall in love- you spend a lot of time with your mind/body/soul, this gives you opportunity to learn more about your person, needs, + interests. ► Ideas: hygiene, visit the spa, get a makeover, change your wardrobe, ride your bike, find a therapist, impromptu solo dancing, etc ► Care for yourself in healthy ways in to receive healthy results in physically and emotionally 6️⃣ ─ PEER OPINION: ► It's important to distinguish when and when not to consider others’ thoughts on yourself yet both are good for you to an extent. ► Do not consider others' thoughts on: your personal feelings, appearance, sexuality, gender expression, etc. Do consider others' thoughts on; your lifestyle, choices, behavior, etc. (this is for your safety considered by your loved ones) ► Portray yourself as positively as you can so others have positive impressions of you. You don’t want a bad rep that can cause problems for your future. Chances are, no one thinks as negatively of you than yourself. ► You're worthy of feeling comfortable about yourself, allowed to want to find ways to eliminate the hatred you have towards yourself and at the end of the day you're in control! ~ 🅱️

[bigsisterlita]

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* B’s GUIDANCE *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧ 1️⃣ Fast forward: "I really wanna lose weight because I look like a whale compared to others." The biggest mistake is comparing yourself to others. It will not lead you to body positivity, acceptance nor confidence. It'll only leave you feeling frustrated and depressed with low self esteem. Others' weight should have no connection or concern with yours. 2️⃣It's important to realize there will be others who are slimmer, bigger more petite, rounder, muscular, chubbier than you, etc. A fraction of them may possibly have certain medical conditions whose weight could be a result of. With that being said, others' weight or conditions should no longer be your motivation source. I suggest finding a more beneficial one like in the eyes of those who care for you, a healthier meal plan, and adequate exercise. 3️⃣The fact you no longer wanna resort to your unhealthy eating habits means you're on the right path but only you are able to overcome that by having a realistic, beneficial piece of motivation, learning that unhealthy eating habits and disorders do serious damage to your body, and realizing that if you plan to alter your body, it should be for yourself and not others. 4️⃣ I cannot stress enough that your specific weight for your age is completely okay. Being a few pounds under/overweight of the designated weight-to-age professionals provide is normal as everyone has different body types and never usually meet the criteria. As long as your body is proportional and not a danger to your health, there's not much reason to drastically change it. Instead, change your feelings towards your body, not your body towards your feelings. ~ 🅱️

[bigsisterlita]

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* B’s GUIDANCE *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧ 1️⃣ She will regret her actions in the future. As of now she probably doesn't know the implications of it. At around age 11-12, you are curious of things because that's when you learn about the opposite sex* and it is usually when sex education is learned at school. This leaves many children confused because of how brief it is. 2️⃣ Telling her mom has pros and cons. PROS: •An adult will be able to take action or definitively persuade her to stop. •An adult will have more experience •An adult may have heard of cases where sending nude pictures have gone wrong. These stories could be told to your cousin which will allow her to see the dangers of it. CONS: •Your cousin may be embarrassed if her parents knew. Would you want your parents to know or would you be scared of their reaction? •This could cause an argument between you two, which could ultimately cause an argument between your Mom and hers. 3️⃣ Instead of bringing in an adult at first, try looking into cases where pictures have been spread. Inform her of how if someone is found with pictures of her on their phone, they could be prosecuted for being in possession of explicit pictures of a minor. She could also get in to trouble with the law for distribution of child pornography. If you cannot persuade her to stop in these ways, then resort to an adult. If your help doesn't work, then tell your mom the whole story. Together you can decide what to do going forward to help your cousin. If she is confronted and chooses to lie, your mom already knows your story and no amount of lies should be able to dispute that your mother will believe her daughter. ~ 🅱️ (credit to Ellie)

[bigsisterlita]

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* B’s GUIDANCE *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧ 1️⃣ Depending on the circumstances of your private being shown to a guy, he's possibly seen only one or a few to know that comparing them is pointless considering each vulva is different from another. Not only that, they all serve the same purposes - urination, menstrual cycle, child bearing + sex so it's appearance is also pointless. If his concern is appearance, it's likely due to his overexposure of the porn industry's unrealistic vulva standards - bye Felicia ✌🏾️ 2️⃣ Again, every vulva is certainly different than others, no two are exactly alike, and there are no standards or such thing as a "perfect vagina" so self-consciousness is redundant knowing yours is unique to your own body. Worrying about what someone thinks of it is unnecessary because at this age, not only will it rarely be exposed but it's not meant to be attractive 💁🏾 3️⃣ Shaving your pubic hair isn't a must seeing it doesn't cause any hygienic or harmful issues but it should be a personal choice solely based on your own comfort and security, not anyone else's choice. If you so choose to shave, you can cautiously use a razor or safe and easy products like shaving creams aimed at removing pubic hair. Remember - it's a private part of your body that you own and care for which no one else does so their opinion is irrelevant 💅🏾 ~ 🅱️

[bigsisterlita]

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* B’s GUIDANCE *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧ There is no specific guide to overlooking being misgendered but if it helps reduce any remaining tension, anger, or resentment towards yourself or anyone else then there are a few ideas you should realize. Do know that being "out" plays an important role to the situation so whatever position you're in at school is something to keep in mind 🏫 1️⃣ One idea to realize is people are ignorant to gender being a social construct and simply refuse to educate themselves. Assuming they're aware you may be out but still misgender you, ignore AND pity them. If you cannot avoid contact with people who misgender you, be blunt and tell them you will not further engage in a conversation until they learn to respect you. 2️⃣ Another idea to realize is they're simply confused. Whether they're attempting to educate themselves or not, this is a learning experience for them and it's fascinating from those on the outside. Regardless, be assertive and tell them you prefer to be called "they" regardless of what anyone else besides you says. If they cannot respect your wishes even after being polite, you send them on their way or misgender them for fun too and see how they like it 😅 3️⃣ Choose an outcome you're most comfortable with and will involve the least amount of stress, anger, or drama for you. Whether it's providing them with their own medicine or pitying them and sending them on their way to either educate themselves or remain incompetent, it's important to remember it has everything to do them rather than you. You are fighting your own demons and hopefully trying to better yourself, now it's time for others to do so ☺️ ~ 🅱️