I think what is so striking about Spike's redemption arc and how his relationship develops with Buffy is that it's not a linear path. Spike doesn't just fall in love with Buffy, get the chip, and suddenly turn into a good person. He doesn't even get his SOUL and turn into a good person. He is Constantly fucking up.
I've just rewatched s5e18 intervention, even in the course of a single episode, he does what he does with the buffybot, while also being willing to die for Dawn to spare Buffy pain (and that's one reason why this episode slaps so hard too, because he wasn't just willing to die FOR buffy, to save her life, but just to spare her further loss!).
and Buffy's acceptance, reliance, and eventual genuine love for him is painstakingly earned. I've thought this many times but both SMG and James Marsters' performances should have won Oscars.
You can FEEL her conflict. You can SEE in him that, when she says "that was real. I won't forget it," that This, this moment of real connection between them, all their history and hatred and the messy awful horrible bits intact, made it all worth it for him. That anything in the world would be worth it, to be let in just that much more.
I can't get over the fucking eye contact in this scene, the way SO much is communicated in both of their faces.
