#but evil...

[shukuchiisms]

~~

[enemy-of-the-steak]

The Lake District Trip - Day Two

We woke up early to go and pick up our brother from a train station that was even more in the middle of nowhere than our air bnb. After collecting him we drove straight to one of the parking lots for the national park.

I had never gone on a hike before but, boy, I loved it. Telling my sister this later she doubted me due to how tired I got during the last stretch. And I guess it is strange to enjoy something that causes you to feel pain and exhaustion, but what's the point of enjoying things that you can do without pushback. I think the struggle made it better, because in spite of it, I still completed the hike, and that felt great. I enjoy writing even though I sometimes get writers block, I enjoy watching sports even when my team loses, I enjoy things that aren't always comfortable and easy. Is that not just a part of life? Her comment really struck me, why should I not enjoy it just because I struggled? That doesn't seem like a good philosophy to hold onto. Sure, I do like to give up sometimes, but the struggle I endured during that hike made it better, it made me want to try it again and again until I no longer struggled. The brain's weird, I'm not a scientist.

We began driving home (air bnb) when we got to a hill. 25% incline. Our car is a manual 7-seater, that's over 10 years old, and my sister has only been driving for a little over a year. A hill like this had never been conquered.

We kept rolling back, not drastically, just enough to make my stomach turn and a faint wave of anxiety wash over me. I didn't doubt that we would get over that hill, I just thought that it would take a little extra effort. I was nervous when the car started rolling back, as it ignored my sister's foot on the break, but I thanked some god or another when I heard the sound of metal scraping against brick and the pop of a tire, keeping us in place. My sister was stressed, but standing at the half way point of that hill and looking down at the curved road, I was incredibly thankful. Flashes of how bad it could've been occupied my mind, I didn't even realise how dead we all would've been if the wall hadn't been there to stop us. The car was fucked but at least we were alive.

We waited outside by the car in the middle of the road for four hours. The only reason we manged to get back to the air bnb was because our kind host picked us up in his truck. The car was still there awaiting pickup when we left.

What was supposed to be a brilliant vacation was soured by the existence of a hill. Every good thing that had happened so far felt distant and the only memory that remained was the four hours of hopeless waiting on the side of the road.