#but mostly rio

[nickmillerscaulk]

rio in 1x04: 

me: 

[nickmillerscaulk]

"#it’s a good thing i only thought about his teeth/smile a normal amount before seeing this #(she said yknow like a lying liar) #NO rio’s smile/teeth do not live rent free in my head" tell me more

(x) have you seen that man’s teeth?! have you seen him SMILE WITH ALL OF THEM???? it’s like looking into the goddamn sun—all bright and captivating and i shouldn’t look as closely as i do but i can’t help it. he has so many teeth and they’re all so pretty?? idk idk there’s no way to explain without sound absolutely bonkers hahaha so i’m just gonna make you all look at a bunch of gifs of some of the toothy!rio moments that live in my mind rent free

[nickmillerscaulk]

nothing says ~how to woo your crime wife into more crime~ quite like inviting yourself over to briefly tutor her kid in math despite your inability to count 

[nickmillerscaulk]

rio: *smashing the hans figurine and rage!squishing his face*

me: 

[nickmillerscaulk]

the 4x02 petty!rio checklist

sit outside (but down the block from) beth’s house and wait

brainstorm things to say that’ll get her all riled up

flash headlights to get beth’s attention

when beth asks what you’re doing, tell her “just thinkin’” (**make it soft n vaguely flirty!!!!!)

when beth asks if you have to do it here, ask her if she’d rather you “do it inside?”

ask how dean is (sarcastically)

listen to beth’s concerns and reply with a request for her routing number

refer to lucy (RIP) as ‘that little coworker’ of hers

laugh at beth when she says she’s drawing heat from a hot tub guy

immediately follow up with a second request for routing number

let patience slip a lil and shorten ‘routing number’ to ‘number’

watch dean come outside looking for beth and put the cheshire cat’s smile to goddamn shame

watch beth recoil and enjoy it

do an elaborate pen click flourish for ~dramatique effect~

in case the pen thing didn’t click (lol) with beth, let her know you’re “ready whenever” for that routing number

[nickmillerscaulk]

goD it’s been so long since i lost my entire mind over tshirt!rio

[nickmillerscaulk]

on one of my two (read: six) rewatches of 4x07, i noticed the costume jewelry slip’s seller name is “J DEAUX” aka john doe, but spelled liKE A DRAMATIQUE HEAUX

in conclusion: someone on gg is def creepin’ on the tumblr fandom and rio is as dramatique as we all call him out for being hahaha

[nickmillerscaulk]

jesuS CHRIST no single shot of rio has left me as permanently unhinged as the one we see in 4x06 where his brow is all furrowed and focused and tucked into beth’s neck as he fingers her and she grabs the frame of the bookshelf everythinG IS FINE IT’S FINE I’M FIIIIIIIIINE