Apr 6, 2023
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i feel a desire for sensuality right now
What happened in your past that deprived you of human contact? Don't answer if you are uncomfortable. Just wondering.
Hey anon!
I've answered this better in a reeeeeeeeeeeeally long readmore back in... August? July? Somewhere around summertime when I was really getting into Phantom of the Opera.
But when I was younger, like REALLY younger, my family was incredibly huggy. But after my papa (grandpa, dad's side) passed on, my dad stopped hugging me. A whole bunch of other bullshit happened, and by age 8 my mom wasn't a hugger anymore either.
Through most of my teenage years I only had one friend who actually ever hugged and I didn't like it much because I wasn't used to it.
Hugging started to get associated with death and funerals for me and a lot of the people who would hug me at funerals just... were very, very fake. So I kinda came to associate hugging/physical contact with someone being a lying fake bitch? So I stopped hugging people and I actively fought to not share 'space' with anyone anymore...
I probably explained it better in that readmore. If I can dig it up I'll reblog it, but the short version is my family went from touchy/huggy to completely devoid of physical contact between any of us except for at funerals and such, and then it felt really insincere so I learned to distrust human contact/touch.
top 5 ended shows
TOUCH (ノಠ益ಠ)ノ彡┻━┻
LOST
PRIVATE PRACTICE
BREAKING BAD
VERONICA MARS
vigilantism said: that’s what happens when you share a room with an early riser ~ ~ ~ it’s ok. one day we’ll all get together for a sleep over and we’ll make sure that we dress you up funny and take pictures, ohoho
it isn't that i don't wake up in the morning, i have to get up early every day. i just hate getting out of bed so once i look at the time i force myself to fall asleep again. but curses layla for just waking up and staying up
pretty sure i'm going to notice you trying to change me = 3=