I know I have not posted any original content in a long time and hopefully, I can change that soon. Things are getting worse with my grandparents. My Papaw was in the hospital for about 3 weeks with pneumonia, blood loss due to a tear in his abdomen, and a kidney infection. He was sent to the hospital again after taking a downward spiral as soon as he got home. He had fallen several times, was talking out of his head, and could not remember where the bathroom was. My cousin Ashlie was over there at the time to help with cleaning and fixing them something to eat. She was the one who called 911. To make a long story short, the diagnosis they had given him was very alarming. They had to give him a shot of what we think was Narcan. In case you don't know, Narcan is often used when you've overdosed on drugs and it knocks them out of your system almost instantaneously. Now, I had to drive to the hospital at midnight with Mamaw in tow to pick Papaw up because he was stupidly discharged. When Mamaw walked into the room, he sat up and said to her, "They said I had too many drugs in my system. You did this." Her reaction? A deer caught in the headlights look--she knows she's been caught. I don't know what drug was in his system, but it was enough to warrant a shot of Narcan. This is what Mamaw does--she practically feeds him sleeping pills, pain meds, and nerve pills when she can't deal with him. Whenever he actually IS awake, she will sit there and berate him, calling him a "crazy bastard". The other day, she said that out loud and my Mom got so pissed that she looked Mamaw dead in the eye and said, "Shut your mouth and leave him alone." To make matters worse, she didn't stop. She kept mocking him because he wanted Mom to make him soup. To make matters worse, she has people convinced that he's suffering from dementia when he actually isn't. She has lied so much to the doctors that they believe every word she says. Their primary care physician has never issued any tests for Papaw. Instead, he is dispensing more and more drugs for conditions that he does not have. Papaw can't speak up for himself because no one will believe him. I think Mamaw's doing that to cover up the abuse. She knows she'll get caught otherwise. I think that my Mamaw is trying to kill him by making him overdose. I cannot bring myself to look at this woman, knowing what she has done and the monster she has become. I'm constantly at odds with myself, struggling to reconcile with the knowledge that it was the stroke that severely damaged her mental state. The woman who used to be my grandmother is long gone. I grieve for her loss even though she is still alive. It's difficult to watch day after day as her mental state further deteriorates to a point of no return. It's even more difficult to forgive her actions, especially when those actions are hurting other people. My aunt and my older cousin have thankfully started taking the initiative and they've started helping us out with taking care of them. We still have nurses who come out to help with physical therapy and cleaning their house. Meals on Wheels comes out once a week to deliver dinners. However, I believe they both need round the clock care. Since Mom and I work all the time, we can only do so much. We have discussed possibly getting them sent to an assisted living facility, as hard as that decision may be. We've done everything we could over the last couple of years. My family is at its breaking point, both physically and emotionally. My IBS has been out of control because of my nerves. I've had 3 flare ups this week alone. I have threatened to call Adult Protective Services on multiple occasions. Mamaw is no longer fit to take care of anyone else, much less herself. The neglect, the emotional abuse, verbal abuse, and the drugging has got to stop. I love my grandparents, but I cannot stand Idly by and watch this happen. The state has to get involved because we can no longer provide them with the tremendous amount of care they now require. I don't know what to do at this point. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
