4 rules for a better tumblr experience
I just had an... Interesting conversation with someone through DMs. I chose to block them in the end since things were getting needlessly aggressive, so I’d like to make something positive out of the experience to get closure on it.
1. Boundaries are important - You can block people for any reason, that’s why the button is so readily accessible. People may criticise you for blocking, hell I’ve criticised people for blocking me in the past, but that comes from ego. Your boundaries are more important than anyone’s ego, and Past-Owen is just gonna have to suck that up. If you feel the desire to block someone, do it. 9/10 times it will make your life better instantly.
2. People have lives outside of the internet - 1 of the things this person said was “Bruh this was HOURS ago, why are you responding now?” as if that’s meant to be a long time? Yes, it was hours ago... Like 8 hours ago... I’ve been out with friends all day so I haven’t checked notifications for 8 hours. A part of me finds it really funny that someone can perceive 8 hours as enough time for something to become irrelevant, but another part of me finds it disturbing. It’s been less than 24 hours and you’re acting as if I’ve dragged up some 2 year old drama, where does this feeling come from? Another anecdote from our friend in the hyperbolic time chamber “You’ve been silent since I responded, got nothing more to say?” Mate it’s been 5 minutes. I went to grab a snack and talk to my parents and you’ve interpreted that as silence?
Personal digs aside, I hope that you, dear reader, bear in mind that time is somewhat meaningless online. You are very rarely having real-time conversations with people the same way a face-to-face conversation would work. Don’t expect immediate responses and don’t be surprised if it takes hours, or days, for someone to reply to you.
3. You should also have a life outside of the internet - I’ve been down this road myself, I think a lot of people were during lockdown. Spending all day, every day online can affect your mood in a lot of bad ways. You become more irritable, less empathetic, generally just more of an asshole. Humans need physical connections, we need a variety of hobbies, we need things that anchor us in terms of behaviour and expectations.
If you’ve recently found yourself getting angry at things or people online over the past few days, I would legitimately recommend a social media detox. You’d be surprised how much your mood lifts when you aren’t subjecting yourself to hostile online environments. Plus the free time you get from not scrolling through feeds and dashes for a week can be put towards another hobby. The 1 big thing that stops a lot of people is FOMO. “What will happen if I miss a week’s worth of posts?” Good question, can you even think of 5 posts that you saw over a week ago? Did any of them change your life? If you answered “Nah mate” to both of these questions, then you should not be afraid to miss out.
4. Pick your battles - Perhaps contrary to what I just said in point 3, SOMETIMES you can justify getting angry and having an argument, but you DO have to justify it. Arguing over politics, or something deeply meaningful to you? Worth pursuing, try not to lose your cool. Arguing over food or interior design or... IDK fucking how to brush your teeth “correctly”? Not worth it, what’s the point? We only have so much time in the day, don’t waste it talking about meaningless crap, let alone getting angry over said crap!
FUCK this post ran long! And to think I wrote this partially out of spite, hot damn. Please consider this an internet checkpoint. Take a deep breath, unclench your jaw, relax your shoulders, maybe do some stretches and re-fill your drink.
