What is their worst fear?
What is their greatest hope?
What is their deepest doubt?
What is a cherished memory?
What is your worst fear?
“Losing another person to those fucking—” Isaiah cut himself off, before closing his eyes and letting out a level breath, “I don’t want to lose anyone else, that’s about it.” His eyes searched the steaming cup of coffee he had in front of him. “Well, I mean there’s the whole ‘not wanting the world to end’ sort of deal. But, y’know, I think most people are like that. I just don’t want to lose another person to the apocalypse ponies.”
Isaiah’s worst fear has gotta be that he’ll lose another person that he was close to ( or, rather, felt close to ) to the horsemen. The integration threw him into a little bit ( understatement ) of denial central ( better than dissociation station that Satan had thrown him into with his little stunt at the Centennial ), he knows that he can’t afford to do what he usually does when he doesn’t know how to handle things — that is, get mean and just try to implode / ruin his relationships — when it is something of this scale but… he can’t help himself. It’s one thing to know that you shouldn’t be doing something, and it’s another thing to actually try to correct that behaviour.
So really his worst fear could be boiled down to loss? He doesn’t want to lose any more people, and he’s now been not-so-kindly reminded that, hey, these people are mortal and they can and will die at some point. Isaiah is only in his mid-twenties, he’s not really had to deal with death on a personal level too much yet.
What is your greatest hope?
“God, I don’t even know.” Isaiah absently ran a hand through the top of his hair, fixing where the strands were sitting, while he thought. “I mean, there’s just— well there’s differences between ‘hopes’ and ‘dreams’, y’know? Like my dream is still the same — gain memorability — but for hopes?” Isaiah squinted, and took at sip of his coffee. “Fuck, I mean there’s jus— there th—” He screwed his mouth up in a pout. “I don’t know, just like— hope that things will get some for of normalcy back. And that’s laughable coming from me — I’ve never wanted for things to be normal in my life. But now I just… want people to be safe. And happy.”
Pretty well explained by Isaiah himself up above, but like… he just wants to have that wide-eyed wonder back, and hopes that after the apocalypse has been stopped — which he really hopes it will be — that people will be able to have that same kind of hunger for knowing that drives him ( kind of a default setting now tbh ) without being terrified that they are going to be killed at any given time.
He wants to give people a future where they can be comfortable in their pursuits of knowledge and of uncovering the unknown. He hopes that there will the opportunity that he’ll get to go back and get some of his old life back. Doubts he will, but still hopes for it.
What is your deepest doubt?
“That this’ll all work out; the the world will still be around after the fourth horseman shows their face. Though, if you want a less ‘world end-y’ answer? That Gracey and I will be able to continue what we’re doing. I know that eventually I’m just gonna slip up. I know I’m gonna fuck it up somehow. And that just… does that even count as a doubt? I think that’s just an inevitability at this point — when don’t I fuck up these things?”
“I’m just— worried. I don’t want to fuck this up but at the same time I know I’m going to. I’m going to fuck it up like I’ve fucked everything else up.”
He can be a bit of a fatalist not gonna lie. He knows some of the scripture and nowhere does it say ( that he’s aware of ) that once the horsemen show up, that things are sunshine and rainbows ever again.
Isaiah is also just Doubt(tm) about his and Grace’s Thing ever having a good ending. He just doesn’t think that he would ever deserve something like that, and definitely believes that Grace deserves better than him.
What is a cherished memory?
“Staying at Gracey’s for the weekend.” Isaiah couldn’t help the smile that worked its way onto his face. “It just, um, it was just really nice — we cooked together and watched a bunch of stuff on Netflix and just kinda hung out. Basic stuff but so nice.”
Literally he’s in so deep with this Thing with Gracey. TheY’RE PRACTICALLY IN A RELATIONSHIP, C’MON. They’re both so boneheaded I’m so 3:<
Susana: What she is trying to say is that Camilo was raised with a silver spoon and deserves a better future than the one your sister can provide. And it's good for you to understand the reality, both of you.
Elisabeta: And who gave you...
Darcy and Camilo approach the table.
Elisabeta and Darcy [boh]: ...the right to speak for me?
Elisabeta: Darcy?
Jane: Camilo?
Susana: I'm just trying to help them.
Elisabeta: Helping by insulting my sister and me?
Susana: No, by being honest and giving you a sense of the reality.
Darcy: And what is the reality? That the Benedito sisters have to put themselves in their place? That Jane is not good enough for Camilo?
Julieta: I'm sorry, Darcy. We are business partners, we share a house, and respect each other, but I don't think this subject is related to you. Camilo is my son and I'll handle it.
Camilo: But it's related to me.
Darcy: And it's related to me too since Susana included Elisabeta in the conversation.
