Mr Chabuduo by Hu Shih: a quick-fix parable
This story by Hu Shih, written in 1924, is about Mr Chabuduo whose name can be translated as Mr Almost Good Enough or Mr More or Less. The quick-fix, it seems, is nothing new.
Do you know who is the most celebrated person in China? His name is well known by everyone and in every land. He is called Mr. Almost Good Enough, and he lives in the village Everywhere, located in Anywhere county of Various province. You must have met him yourself, and heard his name mentioned from other’s conversations. The name of Mr. Almost Good Enough is on the mouth of everyone, because he is the representative of Chinese people.
Mr. Almost Good Enough looks almost the same as you and me. He has a pair of eyes which are bleary; and ears that are not so sharp. He has a nose and a mouth, but cares not much about scents and flavors. He has a brain of a good size which cannot hold many memories, and he is not very intelligent.
He often says, “Why do we need to be thorough so long as ALMOST serves us well?”
When Mr. Almost Good Enough was young, his mother sent him to buy some brown sugar. He returned with white sugar, and his mother scolded him. Shaking his head, Mr. Almost Good Enough thought to himself, “Aren’t brown sugar and white sugar almost the same?”
When Mr. Almost Good Enough was a young student his teacher once asked, “Which province is to the west of Zhili province?” Mr. Almost Good Enough answered, “Shan!” The teacher said, “No, it’s San, not Shan.” Young Mr. Almost Good Enough protested, “Aren’t they almost the same?”
As a young adult, Mr. Almost Good Enough became a teller at a bank. He could write and calculate, but just wouldn’t bother himself to do his work precisely. Fairly often he would lengthen his figures or notations from ten to one thousand, or shorten them from one thousand to ten. The bank manager was very angry with Mr. Almost Good Enough and blamed and scolded him blamed him many times. Mr. Almost Good Enough just grinned and apologized, but though instead, “One thousand just has two more zeroes than ten. Aren’t they almost the same?”
One day Mr. Almost Good Enough had to take a train to Shanghai for some emergency. He walked to the train station at a lazy pace, and was two minutes late by which time the train had already gone. Mr. Almost Good Enough stood staring at the smoke from the train in the distance, and shaking his head, said, “So I have to catch the train tomorrow. It is almost the same to leave today as tomorrow, but the railway company just treats this matter too seriously. Isn’t 8:30 almost the same as 8:32? ” After thinking that, Mr. Almost Good Enough made his way home at a pretty slow speed, still wondering why the train couldn’t wait 2 more minutes.
Some time later, Mr. Almost Good Enough caught a serious illness and one of his uncles sent for Dr. Wang who lived in East Street. The uncle rushed to East Street, but failed to find Dr. Wang, so he asked Dr. Wan the veterinarian. Mr. Almost Good Enough groaning in his bed knew that Dr. Wan was the wrong kind of doctor. The fever was peaking and Mr. Almost Good Enough felt so much pain in his body and anxiety in heart that he could wait no longer. Mr. Almost Good Enough thought, “It’s lucky that Dr. Wang and Dr. Wan are almost the same!” and just let Dr. Wan try to cure him. “So veterinarian Dr. Wan went to the bed and treated Mr. Almost Good Enough in the same way that he would treat a buffalo. In less than an hour Mr. Almost Good Enough’s heart gave up beating. As he lay dying, Mr. Almost Good Enough strained to breathe and gasped, “It is almost the same to be alive as to be dead. Why should people be so serious about things, since things that are almost done still work?“ With these famous words on his last breath, Mr. Almost Good Enough died.
After the funeral, all of the people praised Mr. Almost Good Enough saying that he had seen the truth in everything. They said that Mr. Almost Good Enough was really a man of honor because he couldn’t be serious about anything, wouldn’t take responsibility, and cared for nothing. Soon after all, of the people referred to Mr. Almost Good Enough as the Revered Master of Easy-going Life.
Mr. Almost Good Enough’s reputation was soon widely broadcasted far and wide. Many thousands of people followed his example, and every one earns the name Mr. Almost Good Enough. Henceforth, China became the country known for lazy people.
