Ultimate ship meme, swanfire
Send in two (or more) names and I’ll fill all this out about the ship!
General:
Rate the Ship - Awful | Ew | No pics pls | I’m not comfortable | Alright | I like it! | Got Pics? | Let’s do it! | Why is this not getting more attention?! | The OTP to rule all other OTPs
How long will they last? - Is there a word that means longer than forever?
How quickly did/will they fall in love? - Their relationship was pretty fast initially. They didn’t have a lot of time together, so they fell in love quickly.
How was their first kiss? - Their first kiss took place on a very cloudy afternoon. They were holed up in the bug and hadn’t had a decent meal in days. Neal decided he was going to do something about it. So, while Emma was still asleep, he left her a note that he’d be back. Then, he ventured out. As he wandered the streets of Portland, he noticed a few people in their yards, trying to prepare for the storm. He offered to help clear roof drains, secure any loose yard storage, help with tarps, etc. People were grateful for the help and some even paid him. He’d made enough money to buy lunch for himself and Emma and have some left over for gas. He then went to a local diner and purchased two grilled cheese sandwiches and two hot cocoas, making sure Emma’s had cinnamon in it. He also asked the waitress to cut the grilled cheese sandwiches into triangles. Emma had told him once that she liked it that way and he’d remembered. As he walked back to the car, he felt proud of himself. This was the first time he’d been able to actually provide a real meal for them. Something that wasn’t stolen. And it made him long for more. The rain started just as he left the diner and Neal put the bag of food in his jacket as he hurried off. However, he still had to carry the cocoa. Once he arrived back at the bug, he found Emma wide awake and worrying. She had turned on the radio and discovered that Portland was going to be hit with a bad storm. He climbed back into the car, soaked from the rain, but grinning from ear to ear as he passed her the bag. “Before you ask, I promise it’s all legit. I worked for some money, and bought us lunch.” He replied. Emma, meanwhile, had opened the bag, and saw the sandwiches, cut the way she liked them and then saw the cups of steaming cocoa. For a moment she was silent, and Neal worried that he’d done something wrong. Then, before he could say a word, Emma leaned over and pressed a soft kiss to his lips.
Wedding:
Who proposed? - Neal. He’d been planning on asking her to marry him for years. Since their Portland days, actually. (I refuse to elaborate on how he proposed because this is going to happen in one of our threads, lmao. And I want it to be a surprise.)
Who is the best man/men? - If set in a verse where they got married in Tallahassee/Portland era, it would be just the two of them. But, a Storybrooke verse, it would be Henry, without a doubt.
Who is the braid’s maid(s)? - Bride’s maid? xD Uhh, I’m not sure who Emma would pick, tbh. Snow, maybe.
Who did the most planning? - That would be Snow. I see Emma and Neal being very casual about it and not wanting to go overboard and Momma Snow being like “This must be the wedding of the century!!!” xD
Who stressed the most? - Neal, because he just wants small and simple. Ultimately, though, he’ll be happy as long as Emma was.
How fancy was the ceremony? - Back of a pickup truck | 2 | 3 | 4 | Normal Church Wedding | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Kate and William wish they were this big.
Who was specifically not invited to the wedding? - Peter Pan, lmao. xD
Sex:
Who is on top? - They take turns!
Who is the one to instigate things? - Usually Neal but sometimes Emma.
How healthy is their sex life? - Barely touch themselves let alone each other | 2 | 3 | 4 | Once a couple weeks, nothing overboard | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They are humping each other on the couch right now
How kinky are they? - Straight missionary with the lights off | 2 | 3 | 4 | Might try some butt stuff and toys | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Don’t go into the sex dungeon without a horse’s head
How long do they normally last? - The longest they’ve gone is three consecutive rounds without stopping. But, Neal needs to rest every now and then. They can go longer if they take breaks.
Do they make sure each person gets an equal amount of orgasms? - They don’t sit there and count orgasms. Especially because not orgasming doesn’t mean it’s bad sex or that they’re not satisfied. Sometimes you just don’t reach your climax. Neal and Emma are fair and always make sure both are equally pleasured and that neither one is left unsatisfied.
How rough are they in bed? - Softer than a butterfly on the back of a bunny | 2 | 3 | 4 | The bed’s shaking and squeaking every time | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Their dirty talk is so vulgar it’d make Dwayne Johnson blush. Also, the wall’s so weak it could collapse the next time they do it.
How much cuddling/snuggling do they do? - No touching after sex | 2 | 3 | 4 | A little spooning at night, or on the couch, but not in public | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They snuggle and kiss more often than a teen couple on their fifth date to a pillow factory.
Children:
How many children will they have naturally? - Don’t ask Neal this question because he’ll say like 10, lmao. Realistically, I’d say perhaps four?
How many children will they adopt? - They might adopt a few. I feel like they’d be the type to do that.
Who gets stuck with the most diapers? - I don’t think it would bother Neal too much. He’s so in awe of the idea of fatherhood that he wants every part of it, even the not so nice parts.
Who is the stricter parent? - Let’s be real, here, okay? Neal is like an overgrown child. Seriously. xD Besides, he’s weak when it comes to his children’s pouts.
Who stops the kid(s) from doing dangerous stunts after school? - Emma
Who remembers to pack the lunch(es)? - Both
Who is the more loved parent? - Both of them!
Who is more likely to attend the PTA meetings? Probably Neal, because his schedule is a bit more open.
Who cried the most at graduation? - Neal
Who is more likely to bail the child(ren) out of trouble with the law? - Emma, considering she’s the sheriff.
Cooking:
Who does the most cooking? - Neal. He enjoys it.
Who is the most picky in their food choice? - Neither of them are that picky, except for Neal when it comes to mayo.
Who does the grocery shopping? - Emma. Neal is no longer allowed to go grocery shopping.
How often do they bake desserts? - All the time!
Are they more of a meat lover or a salad eater? - Pfft, salad. MEAT!
Who is more likely to surprise the other(s) with an anniversary dinner? - Probably Neal. He’s a sap.
Who is more likely to suggest going out? - Emma
Who is more likely to burn the house down accidently while cooking? - Emma or Neal if he got distracted
Chores:
Who cleans the room? - Neal is fairly organized but he can also be lazy? So it’s a toss up.
Who is really against chores? - What are chores? Oh, those adult responsibilities, ugh.
Who cleans up after the pets? - Neal
Who is more likely to sweep everything under the rug? - Emma
Who stresses the most when guests are coming over? - Emma
Who found a dollar between the couch cushions while cleaning? - Neal, and it was probably his.
Misc:
Who takes the longer showers/baths? - Usually, they’re long because they tend to share......
Who takes the dog out for a walk? - They both do
How often do they decorate the room/house for the holidays? - Whenever they get the chance
What are their goals for the relationship? - To be happy!
Who is most likely to sleep till noon? - Neal
Who plays the most pranks? - Neal
