Breaking Bot
(read more for some rambling about mega man fully charged)
Mega Man Fully Charged has been on my mind again lately, which made me realize that there's literally a robot named Chemistryman who worked as a chemistry teacher. Not using him as a Walter White stand-in would be a criminal offense.
I'll have to admit I started getting back into Fully Charged again after seeing some asshole on twitter complain about the character design for the hundredth time. I just can't stand that kind of negativity. I swear to god, Fully Charged is like the Sonic Boom of the Mega Man franchise. Personally, I really enjoy the FC designs. I've probably said this before, but I feel like the redesigns give some of the more forgettable robot masters way more character. Like, do I care for Classic Drillman from Mega Man 4? I mean, yeah, I do, but I wouldn't care as much if it wasn't for his Fully Charged incarnation.
I also really enjoy most of the original robot masters. I already talked plenty about Blastowoman and why I love her so much, but I want to talk about the others this time.
Take for example Chemistryman. Comparisons to Walter White out of the way, I feel like his character was a really fun idea. God knows I had teachers who put me to sleep back in the day. For me, it wasn't chemistry though, it was my economics teacher. I always compared her to a story teller at a Christmas market who would read children stories out of her big fairy tale book. Only that in reality, it was stuff like the minimization/maximization principle. Most of my notes for that class were incomprehensible chicken scratch, because I just couldn't keep my eyes open. In the end, I slept through like half her classes, lol. But I gotta say that I still always got a B or higher in the end. Somehow. I thank god every day that I never have to step foot in a school again.
I really wish Chemistryman got a little more time to shine though. Two episodes is just way too little. I would gladly take three more episodes with him over those gross Gutsman episodes. I know I love talking about wasted potential with this show, but I wish there was an episode that focused on Chemistryman outside of the school setting. I get that his whole character is "boring, bitter teacher", but I'd really like to see what he gets up to when he's not trying to force children to listen to his chemistry lectures. Like having Aki try to talk him into going into retirement for good. And then he tries to find hobbies for him so that he doesn't bore himself to death. I can see him getting into building model ships or something like that, lol.
Now that I'm already writing up a storm again, I might as well talk about some other headcanons I have about the FC bots. Since Woodman was in sleep mode for 30 years after the war ended (I don't know where I got that number from. I rewatched his debut episode, but the exact number doesn't appear anywhere. Oh well, let's just pretend this is canon, even if it isn't.) we got kind of a Shadow the Hedgehog type situation on our hands. All of his friends and family got to live their lives in this new, peaceful world of harmony between robots and humans, while Woodman spent 30 years powered down in a bush or something. Completely forgotten about. Like, why didn't they go look for him after the war ended? I don't think Aki and Suna wandered that far into the forest for their school assignment. If you really think about Woodmans back story for a moment, you realize how fucked up it actually is.
Now my explanation for this goes into heavy heavy headcanon territory. When Suna calls the principal about Woodman, he warns her that Woodman is dangerous and to get away from him immediately. Now why would he say that? The principal also calls him "ruthless" in that same explanation. What I think happened back then was that Woodman actually planned to assassinate the human armies leader. (Possibly Sgt. Night?) The leader of the robots caught wind of his plan and put him into sleep mode himself, since he and Dr. Light were on the brink of finding a way to end the war peacefully. In my mind, this leader is the FC version of Swordman. Don't ask me why, he was just the first guy I thought of. And then it just stuck.
I know this makes Woodmans back story even more fucked up, but I just love putting my favorite blorbos through hardship. Don't even ask me about my headcanons for Drillman. They'd actually put me in prison.
Now all this culminates after Woodman is reactivated by Suna and Aki. Finding himself alienated from all his former friends and comrades (Maybe the other Mega Man 2 robot masters?), what was he supposed to do? He couldn't spend the rest of his life isolated (and homeless) in the forest, could he? And this is where season 2 could have delivered. But I'm done whining about that. If Capcom doesn't deliver, I gotta write my own season 2. Simple as that.
Anyway, getting back to Chemistryman, since he's pretty old, I imagine that he was already working as a teacher when Woodman was still around. Maybe he even was his teacher at some point.
And since I love having my favorite characters interact, I also thought of a scenario where Drillman wanders into the forest out of frustration over his miserable life, only to meet Woodman by coincidence. In the end, Woodman helps him work through his daddy issues and his body dysmorphia, while Drillman helps Woodman reintegrate and manage this (for him) completely new world of peace.
Another great headcanon of mine is that Chemistryman is actually Acidmans father. Just because I think it would be funny. And as Fully Charged has confirmed: robots in that universe do indeed have parents. (Flashback to the time I drew Dr. Light beating the shit out of Drillman's father)
Speaking of Drillman.... For being one of my favorite Mega Man characters of all time, I haven't drawn him nearly enough. That will probably be my next project.
This might also be a great time to tell you that I've never watched Breaking Bad before, lol. Everything I know about it comes from RTGame's Stardew Valley playthrough and the RTVS Half Life parody.
Sorry for all the yapping. But if I don't talk about robots at least once a day, I might die. This is a serious condition.
