That Purple-Haired Nuisance
Title: That Purple-Haired Nuisance Summary: Teddy goes for a walk. But nothing’s ever that easy, is it? Author’s Note: Melissa and Alexander Fugate are now officially added. Plus I really wanted to write something with Teddy. Not like it’s the meanest thing I’ve done to him all week, now is it?
Gotham City was a weird place.
It was a place where a teenager dressed in bright purple and yellow could walk down the street with a man-sized robot bird walking alongside him, and no one gave it a second thought.
Teddy had his hands in his pockets, looking around with a faint smile.
Everyone else had decided to take a road trip to Metropolis, and his dad obviously hadn’t let him go. Probably had something to do with the fact that Teddy had almost crashed into a building the last time he and Todd were left unsupervised.
Teddy turned a corner.
Where could he go? He could always find out where Crash lived and show her who the real video game king was. Heck, her dad might have even been glad to see him.
“What do you think, Chicky?” Teddy questioned, “A little Sonic and Mario at the Olympics action?” Chicky-Loo remained silent, and Teddy smiled.
Probably better not to. It was rude to break into a house without at least being invited first.
Teddy chuckled to himself. A girl walked past him, scowling with her hands elbow-deep in her pockets. As she passed she bumped his shoulder roughly.
“Watch it!” She snapped. Teddy looked around at her before smiling again. Wasn’t that…?
“No pun intended, right Tick Tock?” He called. She didn’t answer, and he shrugged before continuing. As he rounded another corner he heard shouting and the sound of breaking glass up ahead, and Teddy’s smile widened to a grin.
“Chicky-Loo, follow.” He instructed and broke into a jog.
Please be Joker please be Joker please be Joker-
As he neared the store that was being broken into, Teddy could see that it was only a small group of guys in ski masks. He slowed down, grin fading a little in disappointment.
“You know what they say, black is the new black.” Teddy remarked, and one of the guys looked at him.
“Beat it, kid!” He snapped. Sirens blared in the distance and Teddy gave an exaggerated turn to look in the direction it was coming from.
“Well, looks like you guys aren’t getting home tonight.”
“Oh really?”
An arm was suddenly wrapped around his throat and Teddy let out a strangled shout of surprise as the thug, who Teddy was now calling Thing One, held him against him like a human shield. Thing One turned to gesture to the others with a quick nod of his head.
“Let’s go.” He dragged Teddy along as they moved towards their escape route, the others carrying TVs and movie players.
“Let go!” Teddy shouted, clawing at Thing One’s arm, “I was joking, come on, no hard feelings?”
“Shut up, kid.” Thing One hissed, tightening his grip. Teddy gagged, feeling his sneakers skidding uselessly against the pavement, and he looked up before pulling the arm away just enough to breath.
“Chicky-Loo!” He shouted, “Attack mode!” Immediately the giant toy buzzed, beak becoming serrated and wings becoming razor sharp. She turned her head and immediately ran after them, and Teddy had to stop himself from cracking up.
His dad had programmed her with the goddamn Naruto run.
“What the-“ Thing Two exclaimed, and Thing One’s eyes widened before moving faster.
Um, ow. Pretty sure the point of the hostage was to be unharmed enough to be worth saving, guys!
Teddy squirmed frantically, unconcerned about Chicky-Loo’s weapons as she darted forward and slashed across Thing One’s arm. He cried out and Teddy elbowed him in the ribs and stamped on his foot, and the guy’s arm loosened enough for him to slip out.
“Oh no you-“ Thing One grabbed Teddy’s plait and yanked him back, and Teddy yelped before Chicky-Loo delivered another swipe across Thing One’s face. He fell back, screaming and clutching his face, and the others stared in shock.
“Little tip; never try to mess with my hair.” Teddy informed them, and then he grinned devilishly, “You guys ever heard of the Toymaker?” Thing Two and Thing Three’s eyes widened and their faces fell.
“Oh shit.”
They ran, and Teddy laughed before turning to Chicky-Loo.
“Chicky-Loo, toy mode.” Her defensive stance relaxed, and her wings and beak returned to normal. Teddy heard the guys shout and he frowned as he turned, but immediately his eyes widened.
Thing Three yelped as a batarang sent him sprawling, and Thing Two tried a punch but it was easily dodged and returned much more accurately.
“Holy shoot.” Teddy beamed. Batman frowned at the two semi-conscious burglars before looking up, and he stopped. Teddy bounded forward, practically bouncing on his heels.
“Bats! Good to see ya! How you been?” He questioned, grinning again. Batman glanced at Chicky-Loo, and then back to Teddy.
“Thomas Krank. Cosmo’s son.”
“Teddy, Bats.” Teddy pointed a finger, “You wouldn’t want me using some of the more colourful names I’ve heard you called, now would you?”
“You were at the Wayne Tech press conference. You were the one who attacked Bruce Wayne.”
“Technically I just punched him. In the face.” Teddy corrected, and then chuckled, “Surprised pretty-boy Wayne was able to get a date after that. I don’t know if you know this but, you know, I kick some serious tail when I want to.” Batman raised an eyebrow.
“Sure. You’re practically the next Robin.”
Teddy grinned wider.
“This is why Todd likes you.” Teddy leant against him, and he practically fell over when he saw what looked like concern pass through the ol’ big bad Bat’s eyes.
“What are you doing out here?” He gestured to the burglars, “You could have been hurt, or worse, killed.”
“I had it covered.” Teddy waved it away, “I always have Chicky-Loo.” Batman glanced at her again before looking back to Teddy, and he frowned slightly.
“Go home, Teddy, before I call your father.”
Teddy held a hand to his chest with a mock gasp.
“You wouldn’t.”
“I would. You’re still in trouble for what you did to Wayne.”
“He had it coming!” Teddy reasoned. When Batman didn’t say anything, Teddy rolled his eyes and stepped away.
“Fine!” He walked back to Chicky-Loo, feigning outrage, and called back, “Make sure when the cops ask you tell them that the hostage was five foot five and took out one of the burglars!”
Batman frowned slightly.
“You’re only five feet tall.” He corrected.
“I can dream, Harold!” Teddy scoffed. He laughed and waved before turning around and heading back towards the main street.
“Chicky-Loo, follow!” Teddy grinned as she hurried to catch up with him, and he glanced at the store before slowly turning around and walking back in the direction he came from.
The Bat wasn’t that bad, for a grown man in a bat costume that ran about on rooftops and got a concussion three times a week.
Teddy laughed again.
Gotham City was a weird place.