Oooo but there was this guy dancing so I just decided to join him. We were back to back and damn he was doing work. I was inspired. It started out pretty normal. But at one point his hand wandered to my upper thigh, and I was so in. My inhibitions were gone, I've never danced so filthily in my life. And since apparently touching was okay my hands were buried in his hair A LOT. I JUST REALLY LIKE HAVING MY FINGERS IN SOMEONE'S HAIR. LIGHTLY SCRATCHING THEIR SCALP. YASSSS. And we both put in work, it was glorious.
This was.....2 weeks ago? No last Saturday!
My mouth tastes like vomit.
I blacked out at the END of the party, so I remember a ton just not us leaving. Then I was home unlocking the door. Then I threw up in the bathroom. Then I took out my contacts. Apparently I did not brush my teeth. Gross me. Ew me. Stap.
(Ch)airman's party was incredible. Absolutely wonderful. Fucking sad as hell. I'm going to miss him. Fuck.
Just being surrounded by people from my past, meeting new people, it was ACTUALLY so much fucking fun. Sad having to say goodbye to him though.
At one point his mom brought us jello shots. Which was just a great moment.
Just barely awkward betwixt me and that dude that I was friends with benefits with in HS. We spoke a few words. Existed in the same area. As I was enjoying my fucking life (head thrown back laughing, I'm not sure but I feel like I look nice when I'm laughing freely?), I could occasionally feel him staring at me, WHICH I WAS VERY MUCH ABOUT. HAHA FUCK YOU.
THAT GUY THAT ASKED ME OUT, (Listen I'll stop being excited when he stops being this dude that I thought was gorgeous, interacted with, thought I had NO chance with this worldly cute 24 year old, and this is him. Him being interested in meeeee. Him PURSUING MEEE)., but yes, him. He was there and we interacted a bit. However I had him to my left, a firepit in front of me, and Rosemary-Michelle-Brian to my right. So I was busy. Getting drunk with old friends, making dirty jokes, just that overwhelming fizzy feeling of being around people that love you. Realizing that we're all going to graduate together again. Wow.
It's nice though. Thus far everytime I've seen him I've been utterly comfortable with old friends. Acting a fool. Not giving a fuck. Loud. Laughing HARD and often, head thrown back. Snorting. Drinking. Spilling a bit. Klutzy. The impression he must have of me is great. He and I have an inside joke regarding my 'ladylike grace', that I mention whenever I spill/trip/am a klutz. Like he's seen me completely free and open. And he's interested. Awesome.
But then I ran into him inside and we chatted. I told him that weekends would work best for us to go get tea together. UGHH. BECAUSE HE WANTS TO GET TEAAA. WITH ME. BLUHGHH
We went back outside together and there was only one open space. So I offered him my lap. I had offered a few people my lap throughout the night, but no one took me up on it. I was everso pleasantly surprised when he said sure. He was worried that I was uncomfortable, but I wasn't so then he actually put his full weight on me, and neh still really fine. I was still just pumped that he didn't give a fuck.
But like, where do you put your hands? Hm? The most comfortable option was on his waist, and he moved his arm to give me more room to do so, I was stupid happy. We chatted and enjoyed the fire and the people around us.
I went to the bathroom and ran into the mother of this girl that I've known since elementary school, was a great moment.
Came back out. THAT GUY WHO ASKED ME OUT, was sitting in a chair of his own, so obv, he offered me his lap. So fucking comfortable. I made sure he was comfortable. We sat like that for awhile.
And then my memory just stops.
Technically a blackout. I'm not even sure how much time I lost. Frickle. Fuck blackout levels of alcohol are also in the area of YOU'RE A GOD DAMNED MESS. I should insure that I was indeed not a mess. I don't think I was at all though. I just seek comfort when I'm drunk and there was a fire. So most likely I was just there. Looking back on it, of fucking course. 5 or 6 shots, 2 angry orchards, and a mike's hard mango over like....4-6 hours. Yeah. Makes sense.
Until I'm trying to unlock the door and it's taking me AWHILE.
Yup. Scraped out my contacts. Hugged the toilet. Took off my pants. Fell the fuck to sleep. Quietly enough not to wake the fam. HAHAAA!
Now I'm off to text the besties and make sure everyone is goood.
