#colleen rambles

[acuaticamber06]

The. Most. Overwhelming first day of school was today.

And how did I shake it off and separate on my way home?

Scream-singing to Ghost for the whole commute, that’s how.

[markiplitessepticeyes]

Mark needs to stop talking like Bim Trimmer on this stream lmao

[neverenoughgay]

Penises are scary

Colleen

[soggywarmpockets]

Neighbor screamed at the pizza guy for parking in front of his driveway for literally 2 minutes while bringing up the food we ordered. Now I’m stressed and angry and all shook up because it bothers me so much when men scream.

And the show mom is watching just killed off a lesbian character for no reason and I’m all kinds of pissed off.

Ugggggghhhhhhhhh.

[acuaticamber06]

GUYS GUYS GUYS STOP WHAT YOU’RE DOING AND LOOK AT MY BIRTHDAY GIFT FROM IYAH

Five vinyls! All different colors! With tons of artwork on the sleeves and each side of the vinyl gets a unique image too!

Hang on, I have to open the rest of them!

[acuaticamber06]

Y’all, sleep deprivation is no joke.

Iyah found a kitten. Maybe 2 weeks old. And I’ve been taking care of him. (Her? It’s too soon to tell.)

Every three hours, this baby needs to be fed, burped, and stimulated to go to the bathroom. And I went into it and stuck to that schedule because I know how fragile new kittens can be.

After more than 24 hours of not having more than 2.5 ish hours of sleep at a time, I was cracking. I was almost emotionless. When I did access an emotion, it was only anger or sadness. I had zero affection for the kitten.

I was having trouble remembering things. I was having trouble communicating. I was having trouble thinking in general. I was also having some pretty intensely strange dreams, and every time my alarm went off, it was harder and harder to wake up.

I sent emails and reached out to several rescues and programs looking for someone, anyone, to take this kitten off my hands so I could sleep. I never got a response (because obviously it’s only been two days now and on the weekend).

This afternoon I cracked.

I settled the kitten down in his box to sleep and laid down and burst into tears. Iyah kept asking me what was wrong and other questions and all I could say was I needed to sleep.

And sleep I did. For four straight hours. The kitten was definitely hungry when I woke up… but very much alive. And I could think again. Find emotions other than sadness. Communicate. Laugh.

And I developed affection for the tiny creature I’ve been keeping alive.

We’ve named him Tenacity. Ten for short. Because he’s a fighter.

As for me, I’ve done some more research. The more a kitten eats during bottle sessions, the more their tummies can hold next time. So after a series of feedings, they can hold more and sleep longer. Meaning I can now safely go four to four and a half hours between feedings. Furthermore, if he’s sleeping, I let him sleep and check in a little later. And if a kitten is gaining weight every day, you’re meeting its nutritional needs, regardless of the schedule you keep.

This evening, he actually latched onto his bottle for the first time since we found him. And he played with my fingers after he ate, which was adorable.

Sleep deprivation is still no joke. Have some sympathy for new parents or folks with insomnia. It messes with you so much more than you can imagine.

[acuaticamber06]

Crying over an Ultraman movie was not on my 2024 bingo card, but here we are.

[acuaticamber06]

My cat just stole lettuce out of my BLT and is crunching it as fast as possible with her back half turned to me like a fucking gremlin.