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ok so you know how in act 2 Michael says "you tried to make me a killer!" and David says "you ARE a killer Michael." what if that was because the whole reason the Emerson family moved to Santa Carla was because Michael killed his dad during that last altercation? it changes nothing and yet everything, but wouldn't it be another fun layer to things?
10/10 dash placement
i'm tired of being an adult with responsibilities and phone calls. i don't want to call the dentist and an exterminator and the tire shop, i want to make mud soup and pretend i'm one of the boxcar children while someone else makes those phone calls instead of me
I just finished Justice In The Dark so I'm very in my feels about it and sharing lots of posts related to it. Trying not to share major spoilers, but if you want to avoid them or just don't want it in your feed, I'm tagging everything as 'justice in the dark'
Since starting my new job, I have begun saying a number of new phrases. But don't be confused, these phrases aren't *because* of the new job, the timing just eerily lines up. I am literally the only person I know saying these things so it's not like I picked them up from new coworkers.
1. All inanimate objects are now addressed as "friend". Printer not working? Come friend. Computer loading slowly? Oh friend. Added bonus for a deep sigh of disappointment followed by "...friend..." as I pet whichever piece of technology is currently acting up.
2. So that I don't yell swear words at work, I now say "curses" but with the same energy as if I were actually swearing. Just. Literally that. Smash my finger? "Curses." Drop a stack of paper? "Curses." Tbf this one has more direct correlation because I work directly with children, but this happened completely unintentionally. Like. This was not a switch I attempted to make. It just kind of happened one day and hasn't stopped.
3. Apparently I say "bruh" now. I... I don't know where this came from. But this is now how I express my disappointment to the shit drivers of my city who either are going much too slowly in front of me on my way to work, are going much too quickly past me on my way to work, or who blow through? very red lights?? next to me on my way to work. Like. Bruh. Come on.
Bonus: while leaving work today, I encountered in quick succession: a car indicating a left turn at an intersection where there... was no road to the left? Where ya goin bud? And a truck just APPEARING behind me in the moments between watching traffic ahead of me and checking my mirrors. Where did you come from?? To which my brain provided: are we encountering Cotton Eyed Joe? (Because apparently I am a walking talking shitpost machine)
I'm realizing how much it hurts to have been told growing up that we were loved unconditionally only to grow into ourselves and grow up against the line where those conditions were drawn. Up until now my spouse and I have largely molded ourselves to meet those conditions, or at least not strain too hard against them, when we're around my parents and my in-laws because we want to still have them in our lives. But I feel it every time we tell our parents that no, we still haven't started going to church again, or I post something queer or liberal on Facebook and our moms pointedly ignore it, or when everyone including me uses the wrong pronouns for my spouse because they weren't ready to take that step with our families yet.
And it's been... while not fine, it's been what we've chosen. We've talked about if we might want to go no-contact with our families, agreed that we support each other if we ever reach that point. But we've recently decided to start actively calling out those conditions and the ways we don't fit them, and while on the one hand it will be so freeing, I'm also. A little terrified of not having the surety of their love anymore. Once they're faced head on with the fact that I do not plan on setting foot inside a church again outside of weddings, and even then, my insides churn with every second I'm there. That who I am is not just a phase that I'll grow out of given enough time and enough pressure. That my spouse will have it even harder as I start exclusively using their correct pronouns with everyone, not just close friends, if our families actively reject that.
It doesn't change my mind about pushing against those conditions. And I want to be hopeful that by some miracle we'll push and find that our families are more accepting than we thought.
But it's still a terrifying step.
Spouse is finally getting me to watch Andor. We're only 3 episodes in and like, Cassian is fine and all, I got no real problems with him as a character, but I am in love with Bix. I would die for Bix. I would kill for Bix. I'm sad that I won't get as much Bix as my heart desires, due to the show being called "Andor" and not "Bix" but somehow I shall cope.
gotta love that midnight urge to come out as openly queer on social media sites with humans who actually know me offline
