Though it has been around for a while, The Onion is still one of the funniest satirical news websites out there known for its irreverent treatment of popular issues.
For example, from The Onion:
Lucrative New Oil Extraction Method Involves Drilling Directly Into Gas Stations
"IRVING, TX—Hailing it as a rapidly replenishable and easily accessible fuel source, ExxonMobil revealed a lucrative new oil extraction method Friday that involves drilling directly into gas stations. “We’ve found nearly unlimited reserves of highly refined petroleum mere meters beneath thousands of service stations across the country,” said ExxonMobil CEO Rex Tillerson, noting that the company had already erected oil extraction rigs alongside pump islands in all 50 states. “As I speak, we’re yielding 3 million barrels per day just by boring through a few thin layers of asphalt, concrete, and metal. And, amazingly enough, the supply seems to somehow refill itself every week.” Tillerson went on to say that the company was exploring the possibility that there were still massive untapped sources of oil already in Americans’ cars, as well as in their homes."
New Study Finds Therapy, Antidepressants Equally Effective At Monetizing Depression
"NORMAN, OK—Noting that similar outcomes were achieved under both approaches, a landmark decade-long study of mental health treatment options published Tuesday has found that talk therapy and antidepressant medications are equally effective at monetizing clinical depression. “Our data indicate that regular counseling sessions and prescription drugs have similarly high success rates in generating large sums of money from the clinically depressed,” said Katherine Hutton of the University of Oklahoma, the study’s lead author, noting that both methods demonstrated consistent positive earnings across chronic, episodic, and seasonal depression cases. “While some people make tremendous profits with drugs, others see substantial revenues from therapy. Together, these are two very powerful tools for improving the health care industry’s bottom line.” The study concluded that when both approaches are combined, financial results are likely to be reached far more quickly than with one method alone."
