4.7k + words , angst , could perceive reader as an emotionally wise drunk or a truth-spilling drunk , however you'd like to interpret reader , fem!reader
title - go go juice , Sabrina Carpenter
series mlist
Reader hated the internet.
Every part of it. Every app, every comment section, every stupid little algorithm that somehow always knew exactly what would upset her most. But she especially hated Alex’s corner of the internet.
No matter how many times she pressed not interested, muted words, blocked fan accounts, or scrolled past as quickly as possible, clips of Alex and Tara still found their way onto her feed.
And neither of them seemed ashamed. Not even slightly.
Reader saw it everywhere—livestream clips, tweets, TikToks, edits with romantic music layered over them. Tara laughing too hard at something Alex said. Alex staring at her for just a second too long. Flirting that wasn’t even subtle anymore.
And Reader hated how much it still affected her.
Because only a week and a half ago, Alex had stood in her flat apologising. Telling her he never wanted things to end like that. Telling her there was nothing serious between him and Tara.
Another lie.
And somehow, Reader had still believed him.
Again.
The thought alone made her feel stupid.
To stop herself from spiralling completely, she’d spent the past week forcing herself to stay busy. The first four days after ending things with Alex had been miserable—barely leaving bed, crying at random moments, ignoring half her messages, surviving mostly on takeaway and wine.
But after that, she’d thrown herself into anything that kept her distracted.
Brand deals. PR events. Dinners with friends. Random influencer parties she normally would’ve avoided. She’d even started agreeing to trips and collaborations she would usually overthink for weeks beforehand.
Anything to stop herself sitting alone with her thoughts.
And honestly, it almost felt validating now. In a horrible sort of way.
Seeing Tara and Alex openly flirt online should’ve made Reader feel worse than she already did, but instead, it confirmed everything she’d spent weeks questioning.
She hadn’t been dramatic.
She hadn’t been insecure for no reason.
She hadn’t imagined any of it.
For months, she’d convinced herself she was overthinking things every time Tara flirted with Alex on stream. Every time her stomach dropped while Alex awkwardly laughed instead of shutting it down. Every time fans pointed things out online and Reader defended him anyway.
But now?
Now they weren’t even trying to hide it.
And somehow, that almost gave her peace.
Alex was the furthest thing from Reader’s mind.
At least, for most of the night.
He wasn’t in her thoughts while she sat crammed into a booth at dinner with her friends, laughing so hard her stomach hurt. He wasn’t there when they left the restaurant and wandered into some tiny hole-in-the-wall club hidden down a side street. The best kind of club, honestly. Warm amber lighting, exposed brick and cobblestone walls, old 2000s songs blasting from the DJ booth while everyone screamed the lyrics badly over each other.
For the first time in what felt like ages, Reader was only focused on herself and the people around her.
Shots appeared at the table. Then more drinks. Then even more drinks after that.
Another shot.
Another martini.
Another vodka soda.
Someone handed her something pink in a glass and she drank that too without asking questions.
By midnight, Reader was completely, hopelessly drunk.
The kind of drunk where everything became funny for no reason. The kind where walking suddenly felt unnecessarily difficult, like her legs belonged to someone else entirely.
Unfortunately, her friends were in almost the exact same state, meaning there was absolutely no responsible person around to stop Reader from wandering outside with her phone clutched loosely in her hand.
She didn’t go far. Just outside the club entrance where the cold air hit her flushed face instantly.
Reader blinked slowly at her phone screen before opening her recent calls.
Her thumb “accidentally” slipped onto Alex’s contact.
It only rang once before he answered.
Had she been sober, she probably would’ve called him pathetic for picking up that quickly.
“Reader?”
“A—lex!” she squealed, the name coming out mixed with a hiccup.
There was a brief pause. “Oh.”
Reader completely missed the disappointment in his voice. She was far too drunk to notice things like that right now.
“Hiiiii!”
“Reader,” Alex said carefully, “what are you doing?”
“Calling you, duh.”
“Yeah, I know that. How much have you had to drink?”
Reader frowned at the pavement like it personally offended her. “Uh…” She giggled slightly. “I dunno. I’m sorry.”
“No, no, don’t apologise,” Alex said quickly. “I should be apologis—” He cut himself off with a sigh. “Where are you?”
“Uhm… at a club,” Reader mumbled, looking around the street uselessly before turning back towards the entrance.
“Right. Real helpful,” Alex muttered under his breath. She could hear him moving around on the other end of the call now. “What’s the name of the club?”
“I can’t really read it,” she admitted sadly. “Everything’s blurry.”
Alex let out another sigh, though this one sounded more worried than annoyed. “Okay. Is there security or a bouncer nearby?”
Reader looked around slowly before spotting someone standing near the door. “Mhm.”
“Good. Give them your phone so I can talk to them, please.”
Reader’s face scrunched up immediately. “Why? I wanna talk to you.”
“I know,” Alex said softly. “I know you do. But I need to know you’re safe first.”
She could hear rustling on his end again, like he was already grabbing keys or shoes.
Reader’s drunk brain latched onto that immediately.
“Wait…” she said slowly. “Are you picking me up?”
Alex went quiet for half a second too long.
“Do you miss me?” Reader continued before he could answer. “Do you—”
“Reader.” His voice turned firmer suddenly. “Stop. Just for a second, please. Just find a bouncer for me.”
Her expression dropped instantly. “Okay…” she mumbled. “I’m sorry.”
“No,” Alex said immediately, his tone softening again. “Reader, don’t apologise. I shouldn’t have snapped at you like that.”
Reader nodded to herself even though he couldn’t see it, then stumbled back towards the entrance of the club in search of security while still clutching her phone tightly to her ear.
She managed to stumble her way over to one of the bouncers near the entrance, nearly tripping over the uneven pavement in the process.
“Hi,” she said far too brightly. “My ex-boyfriend wants to talk to you.”
The bouncer blinked at her for a second before slowly taking the phone from her hand.
“Hello?” he said cautiously into the speaker.
Reader swayed slightly where she stood, arms folded loosely across herself against the cold while the music from inside the club thumped through the walls behind her.
She couldn’t properly hear what Alex was saying, only the low murmur of his voice through the speaker. The bouncer nodded a few times before glancing over at her.
“Yeah, she’s alright,” he said. “Very drunk, though.”
She frowned. “That’s rude.”
The bouncer laughed quietly despite himself.
A minute later, he handed the phone back to her. “Your boyfriend’s coming to get you.”
Her face immediately twisted. “He’s not my boyfriend.”
The bouncer lifted both hands in surrender. “Alright, alright.”
Reader pressed the phone back to her ear as she wandered over to lean against the brick wall beside the club entrance.
“He called you my boyfriend,” she informed Alex seriously.
Alex actually laughed softly on the other end of the line, and the sound hit her harder than she expected. She hadn’t realised how much she missed hearing him laugh until now.
“Did he?”
“Mhm. I corrected him.”
“Good to know.”
Reader smiled faintly to herself before her expression slowly dropped again. Drunk emotions came fast and hard, and suddenly she felt strangely close to crying.
“You didn’t block me,” she mumbled quietly.
Alex went silent for a moment. “Neither did you.”
She looked down at the pavement beneath her shoes. “I tried to hate you.”
The confession slipped out before she could stop it.
Alex let out a slow breath. “Reader…”
“I’m serious,” she continued, words slightly slurred now from both the alcohol and exhaustion. “I unfollowed you everywhere. I blocked Tara. I kept telling myself I never wanted to speak to you again.” She laughed weakly. “And then I got drunk and called you anyway.”
Alex stayed quiet long enough that Reader almost thought the call had disconnected.
Finally, he spoke softly. “I’ve missed you too.”
Her chest tightened painfully at the admission.
She squeezed her eyes shut for a second, leaning her head back against the cold brick wall behind her.
“This is so pathetic,” she whispered.
“No, it’s not.”
“Yes, it is,” Reader mumbled. “You hurt me and I still miss you. That’s embarrassing.”
“You missing me doesn’t make you embarrassing.” His voice sounded quieter now too. More careful. “It just means you cared about me.”
She swallowed hard, suddenly wishing she wasn’t drunk enough for all her emotions to feel this close to the surface.
Across the street, headlights turned the corner before slowing near the club.
She frowned slightly. “Is that you?”
“Probably,” Alex admitted. “Can you see my car?”
She squinted dramatically at the road before spotting it properly. “Oh my God, it is you.”
Alex laughed softly again. “Stay where you are, alright? I’m coming over.”
Reader watched him cross the street towards her, hands shoved into the pockets of his hoodie as the cold night air moved through his hair.
And for one horrible second, it felt painfully normal.
Like this was just another night where Alex had come to pick her up after drinks. Like they hadn’t ended things. Like Tara had never happened.
She hated how comforting that thought felt.
Alex stopped in front of her, immediately looking her over carefully to make sure she was alright. His expression softened slightly when he realised she really was just drunk and emotional rather than hurt.
“Jesus,” he muttered quietly. “How much did you drink?”
Reader pointed vaguely towards the club behind her. “A lot.”
“Clearly.”
She frowned at him. “Don’t judge me.”
“I’m not judging you,” Alex said, though he looked like he was trying not to laugh. “I’m just trying to work out if you’re gonna throw up in my car.”
She gasped dramatically. “I would never.”
Alex finally laughed properly at that, shaking his head a little before stepping closer. “C’mon.”
Without really thinking about it, he reached for her hand.
The second his fingers wrapped around hers, both of them seemed to freeze slightly.
Reader’s stomach twisted painfully. Because even now, after everything, holding his hand still felt natural. Familiar.
Alex seemed to realise it too. His grip loosened slightly, like he was about to pull away.
But she held on first.
Just for a second.
Alex looked down at her quietly, his expression unreadable beneath the orange glow of the streetlights.
“You’re staring,” Reader mumbled.
“You’re drunk.”
“Okay, and?”
Alex huffed out a soft laugh before guiding her carefully towards the passenger side of the car. He opened the door for her automatically, another habit neither of them had managed to break yet.
Reader climbed in clumsily before looking up at him again. “You still care about me.”
It wasn’t a question.
Alex paused halfway through shutting the door.
“Reader…”
“You do,” she insisted softly. “I can tell.”
For a second, he just looked tired. Emotionally exhausted in a way Reader recognised because she felt it too.
“Of course I still care about you,” he admitted quietly.
Her chest tightened again at the honesty in his voice.
“Then why did you let me go?” she asked before she could stop herself.
Alex shut the car door gently without answering.
And somehow, the silence hurt even more than the answer probably would have.
“You didn’t answer my question,” Reader mumbled once Alex finally got into the driver’s seat.
Alex glanced at her briefly before starting the car. “It’s the kind of question I’d rather answer when you’re sober. So you actually remember it.”
Reader frowned immediately. “I remember everything I do when I’m drunk.”
Alex let out a quiet laugh under his breath as he pulled away from the curb. “You really don’t.”
“Yes, I do.”
“You absolutely don’t.”
Reader crossed her arms stubbornly, nearly losing balance against the seatbelt in the process. “Name one time I forgot something I did drunk, then.”
Alex’s mouth twitched slightly like he already knew she wouldn’t like the answer.
“Silky’s party.”
Reader scoffed instantly and rolled her eyes. “Nothing happened at that party.”
Alex actually laughed properly this time. “Reader, a lot happened at that party.”
“Like what?” she challenged.
Alex glanced at her again briefly before looking back at the road. “You kissed me.”
Reader blinked at him. “No, I didn’t.”
“You did.”
“I think I would remember kissing you, actually.”
Alex shook his head slightly, clearly amused despite himself. “Well, you don’t.”
Reader stared at him suspiciously for a few seconds, trying to dig through her blurry memories of that night. All she really remembered was dancing with friends, arguing with someone over music, and waking up with the worst headache of her life the next morning.
“You’re lying.”
“I’m not.”
“Alex.” Reader pointed accusingly at him. “If I kissed you, I definitely would’ve remembered it.”
“That’s what I thought too.”
Reader narrowed her eyes. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
Alex sighed softly through a smile. “It means you spent half the night insisting you didn’t like me, then dragged me into the kitchen and kissed me ten minutes later.”
Reader’s jaw dropped slightly. “I would never do that.”
“You absolutely did.”
“No. Nope. Didn’t happen.”
Alex laughed again, quieter this time, and Reader hated how much she’d missed hearing that sound.
“You even got annoyed because I laughed afterwards,” he added. “You told me I was ruining the moment.”
Reader covered her face with both hands immediately. “Oh my God.”
“There we go,” Alex said smugly. “That reaction tells me you’re starting to remember.”
“I hate you.”
“No, you don’t.”
The words slipped out casually, but the second they landed between them, the atmosphere in the car shifted slightly.
Reader slowly lowered her hands from her face and looked over at him.
Alex seemed to realise what he’d said a second too late, his grip tightening slightly against the steering wheel.
Because the worst part was… he was probably right.
Reader wanted to hate him. She’d spent weeks trying to.
But sitting here beside him now, drunk and emotional while he drove her home like he’d done dozens of times before, hatred felt impossible.
Complicated? Yes. Painful? Absolutely.
But not hatred.
Reader looked down at her lap quietly before mumbling, “That’s the problem.”
“I am sorry, Reader,” Alex said quietly after a long stretch of silence. “I really am.”
Reader kept her gaze fixed out the passenger window, watching blurry streetlights pass by one after another. LA looked strange at night when she was this drunk. Too bright and too distant all at once.
“I don’t know if I believe you anymore,” she mumbled eventually.
Alex’s hands tightened slightly around the steering wheel. “Why not?”
Reader let out a tired laugh under her breath. “Seriously?”
She finally looked over at him properly.
“Because every single clip I see of you lately is you flirting with Tara,” she said softly. “Even after you stood in my flat telling me there was ‘nothing serious’ going on between you two.” She swallowed hard. “Those clips just completely contradict everything you told me that night.”
Alex went quiet immediately.
Reader looked away from him again before continuing. “And maybe I could’ve handled it if it was just one clip. But it’s not. It’s everywhere.”
She laughed weakly to herself. “Do you know how humiliating it is opening TikTok and seeing edits of the two of you?”
“Reader—”
“No, seriously.” Her voice cracked slightly now. “People are literally shipping you together publicly while I’m sat there feeling like some stupid ex-girlfriend who got replaced overnight.”
“You weren’t replaced.”
Reader scoffed softly. “Sure doesn’t look that way.”
Alex sighed heavily, glancing at her briefly before looking back at the road. “It’s not as simple as it looks online.”
“That’s exactly what you said the first time,” Reader pointed out quietly.
That shut him up for a moment.
Reader rubbed tiredly at her eyes before leaning her head against the cold window beside her. “I just don’t understand how you went from saying you loved me to publicly acting like that with her barely a week later.”
Alex’s jaw tightened slightly. “I didn’t plan for any of this.”
“But you’re still letting it happen.”
The words hung heavily in the car.
Reader could tell Alex was trying to think of something to say, but honestly, she wasn’t even sure there was a right answer anymore.
After a moment, Alex spoke again, quieter this time. “Do you really think I never cared about you?”
Reader’s chest ached immediately at the question.
Because that was the problem.
She knew he cared about her. In his own messy, emotionally confusing way, he definitely had.
But caring about someone and treating them properly weren’t always the same thing.
Reader looked down at her hands in her lap. “I think you cared about me when it was easy,” she admitted softly. “But the second things got complicated, you stopped fighting for me properly.”
Alex visibly flinched at that.
And Reader hated that part of her still felt bad for hurting him, even now.
“But I also think,” Reader continued quietly, “that you genuinely don’t know the difference between caring about someone and actually treating them the way they deserve to be treated.”
Alex stayed silent beside her.
“With care,” she said softly. “And love.”
The last word caught slightly in her throat.
Reader swallowed hard and turned her head towards the window again before she could say anything else. Streetlights blurred together outside as the car moved through the empty roads, her reflection faintly visible in the glass.
“And I…”
Her voice faded off completely.
A sharp breath caught in her chest as she pressed her lips together tightly, suddenly regretting how much she’d already admitted tonight.
Beside her, Alex loosened one hand from the steering wheel slightly before gripping it again.
“Finish what you were going to say,” he murmured.
There was no irritation in his voice. No pressure. He sounded like he genuinely wanted to hear it, even if it hurt.
Reader shut her eyes briefly. “I don’t know if I can handle being cared about like that anymore.”
Alex frowned slightly. “What do you mean?”
Reader laughed quietly to herself, though it sounded more sad than amused. “You cared about me enough to keep me around,” she admitted. “Enough to text me constantly, take me out, tell me you loved me…”
Her throat tightened again.
“But never enough to make me feel secure.”
The car fell silent after that.
Reader could practically feel the guilt radiating off him beside her, but she forced herself to keep talking anyway because if she stopped now, she knew she wouldn’t start again.
“I spent months trying to make myself smaller so I wouldn’t scare you off,” she whispered. “I acted chill about things that were actually hurting me because I didn’t want you thinking I was dramatic or difficult.”
Alex looked genuinely pained hearing that. “Reader…”
“No, it’s true.” She shook her head slightly. “I let myself settle for half of what I wanted because I thought eventually you’d give me the other half on your own.”
Alex’s jaw tightened as he stared ahead at the road.
“And maybe that’s my fault too,” Reader admitted quietly. “Because I should’ve walked away the first time I realised I was begging for things that should come naturally when someone really wants you.”
The words seemed to hit Alex hard enough to physically tense beside her.
Reader looked down at her hands again. “I loved you properly,” she whispered. “And I don’t think you realised how much responsibility comes with being loved like that.”
For a moment, Alex didn’t say anything at all.
Then, very quietly, almost like it hurt him to admit it, he said:
“I think you’re right.”
Reader sucked in a slow breath, nodding faintly as she stared down at her hands.
Hearing Alex agree with her should’ve felt satisfying somehow. Like confirmation that she hadn’t imagined everything. But instead, it just made her chest ache more.
The car was quiet for a few seconds before she finally spoke again.
“Why did you only try to fight for us when I asked you to leave?” she asked softly. “Even after you were the one saying we should break things off.”
Alex’s grip shifted slightly against the steering wheel. He looked exhausted now, emotionally worn down in the same way Reader felt.
“Because…” He paused briefly, like he was trying to figure out how to explain it properly. “Truthfully, I only said I wanted to end things because I didn’t want you getting dragged into whatever drama was coming.”
Reader frowned slightly but stayed quiet, letting him continue.
“I knew people were already talking,” Alex admitted. “About me. About Tara. About you. And I panicked.” He laughed weakly to himself. “I thought if I ended things first, maybe I could protect you from it getting worse.”
Reader looked over at him properly then. “You really thought breaking my heart was protecting me?”
Alex winced immediately. “When you say it like that, it sounds awful.”
“Because it was awful, Alex.”
“I know.” His voice dropped quieter. “I know that now.”
Reader leaned back slightly against the seat, listening while he spoke.
“I realised way too late that it wasn’t my choice to make for you,” he continued. “You should’ve had the chance to decide whether you wanted to deal with all of it alongside me.”
The honesty in his voice made something painful twist in Reader’s chest again.
“But by the time I figured that out,” Alex said softly, “you’d already made up your mind.”
Reader swallowed hard.
“And honestly…” Alex glanced at her briefly before looking back at the road. “If I’d realised it earlier, I don’t think we’d be sitting here having this conversation right now.”
Reader’s heart stuttered painfully at that.
Because part of her immediately wanted to ask what he meant by it. Whether he would’ve made things official. Whether he would’ve chosen her properly if he’d just gotten out of his own head sooner.
But another part of her already knew those questions wouldn’t help anymore.
So instead, she looked back out the window and asked quietly, “Then why didn’t you say any of that that night?”
Alex let out a slow breath. “Because I was scared.”
Reader laughed softly under her breath. “You know, for someone who spends his entire life online in front of thousands of people, you’re unbelievably bad at talking about your actual feelings.”
Alex smiled faintly at that, though it didn’t quite reach his eyes. “Yeah. I’ve noticed.”
Reader shook her head slightly. “You could’ve just talked to me.”
“I know.”
“And I probably still would’ve stayed.”
That seemed to hit him harder than anything else she’d said tonight.
Alex looked genuinely upset hearing it. “Reader…”
“It’s true,” she admitted quietly. “That’s the pathetic part.”
“No,” Alex said immediately. “It isn’t pathetic to love someone.”
Reader looked over at him then, eyes tired and glossy beneath the passing streetlights.
“Maybe not,” she whispered. “But it hurts when they don’t know what to do with it.”
Alex went quiet after that.
Not defensive. Not frustrated. Just quiet in the sort of way that made Reader think her words had actually settled somewhere deep inside him.
The car continued moving through the near-empty streets, the low sound of the engine filling the silence between them.
Reader rested her head back against the seat, suddenly exhausted. The alcohol was starting to hit her differently now — less loud and fun, more heavy and emotional.
After a while, Alex spoke again.
“I really did love you, you know.”
Reader’s chest tightened immediately.
She gave a small nod but didn’t look at him. “I know.”
Because that was the worst part of all this. If she genuinely believed Alex had never cared about her, moving on probably would’ve been easier. Cleaner.
But she knew he had loved her. In the only way he seemed to know how.
It just hadn’t been enough.
“I don’t think you’re a bad person,” Reader admitted quietly after a moment. “I think you’re just emotionally stupid.”
Alex let out a breath that almost sounded like a laugh. “That might be the nicest insult anyone’s ever given me.”
Reader smiled faintly despite herself before it faded again just as quickly.
“You hurt me anyway.”
“I know.” His voice sounded rough now. “And I hate that I did.”
Reader looked down at her lap again. “Do you actually like Tara?”
The question slipped out before she could stop it.
Alex went still beside her for a second.
Reader immediately regretted asking. “Forget it.”
“No,” Alex said quietly. “You deserve an honest answer.”
Reader’s stomach twisted painfully as she waited.
“I think…” He paused carefully. “I think after everything blew up, I leaned into it because it was easier than dealing with what happened between us.”
Reader frowned slightly. “That’s not really an answer.”
“I know.” Alex sighed softly. “I care about her. But not like I cared about you.”
The words should’ve made Reader feel better. Somehow, they didn’t.
Because if Alex supposedly cared about her more, then why had she still ended up here? Sitting half-drunk in his passenger seat trying not to cry over someone who never fully chose her?
Reader laughed quietly to herself, though it sounded tired more than amused. “God, this is messy.”
“Yeah,” Alex admitted softly. “It is.”
They stopped at a red light, and for the first time since picking her up, Alex properly looked over at her again.
“You deserved better from me,” he said quietly.
Reader held his gaze for a moment before looking away again.
“I know.”
The car moved again as the light turned green, neither of them saying anything for a while.
Reader kept her head turned towards the window, watching the city blur past in soft streaks of orange and white. Her reflection stared back at her faintly in the glass, tired eyes, messy hair, makeup slightly smudged from earlier in the night.
She didn’t feel drunk anymore. Just drained.
Alex drove more slowly now, like he was giving her space to think. Or maybe he just didn’t know what else to say.
After a few minutes, Reader spoke quietly again.
“I think I’m angry at myself as much as I’m angry at you.”
Alex glanced at her briefly but didn’t interrupt.
“I keep thinking I should’ve left sooner,” she admitted. “The first time I felt like I was waiting for you to choose me properly. The first time I saw those clips and told myself I was being paranoid.”
Her fingers tightened slightly in her lap.
“But I didn’t. I stayed. And I made excuses for you.”
Alex’s grip tightened on the steering wheel again. “Reader, you didn’t—”
“Yes, I did,” she cut in softly, though there was no anger in it now. Just honesty. “I wanted it to work so badly that I ignored everything that was making me feel small.”
Silence settled again.
A few seconds passed before Alex spoke, his voice quieter than before. “I never wanted you to feel small.”
“I know,” Reader replied. “That’s why it’s so confusing.”
She finally turned her head slightly towards him.
“You weren’t cruel,” she said. “You weren’t malicious. You were just…” She paused, searching for the right word. “Unclear.”
Alex let out a quiet breath. “That sounds about right.”
Reader gave a faint nod before leaning her head back again.
“I think that’s what hurts the most,” she admitted. “It wasn’t one big moment where everything fell apart. It was just… lots of small ones that I kept ignoring.”
Alex stayed quiet, letting her talk.
“And now I can’t tell if I miss you,” she added after a moment, voice softer, “or if I just miss what I thought this could’ve been.”
That seemed to land heavily between them.
Alex didn’t respond straight away.
Instead, he drove for a while in silence before finally speaking.
“I miss you,” he said quietly.
Reader closed her eyes for a second at that, exhaling slowly.
“I know,” she replied.
This time, there was no confusion in her voice. Just acceptance.
Missing each other wasn’t the problem anymore.
They both knew that.
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JUST KNOW YOU'LL TASTE ME TOO (faze adapt x fem!reader)
smau , people being rude on the internet (what's new) , strong language
title - taste by Sabrina Carpenter
series mlist
yourusername ၊|၊|၊ House Tour.... by Sabrina Carpenter
liked by fazeadapt, cinnabrit, and others!
─ enter through the backdoor 😊
cinnabrit missin you bae xx
yourusername missin you 2
user not adapt liking 💀
user adapt liking is killing me because he was JUST posted up with tara yummy
user he really is a hoe
quenblackwell I gotta get you on starving celebrities
yourusername message my agent rn 🫶
fazeadapt pretty ❤️ liked by author!
user so nonchalant unc 💀
user well it worked
user she's lowk better than tara
yourusername ၊|၊|၊ You Belong With Me... Taylor Swift
liked by emmachamberlin, fazeadapt, and others!
─ the song felt fitting for the last photo🤷♀️
emmachamberlin oh that's believable
yourusername 🤫🤫🤫
user what does this MEANNNN??!!?!?!
user adapt liked again
charlidamelio we need to hang out again x
yourusername last time i hung out with you i got cancelled for supporting you showing nip
charlidamelio we don't need to discuss that rn
user adapt just rlly playing in her face rn ❤️ liked by author!
user not her liking and then unliking the comment 💀
user we all saw girl
totallynotreadershhh ၊|၊|၊ I'm Just Ken... Ryan Gosling
liked by hiiidraded, baymous, and others!
─ the duality of a fucking man.
forksareeverywhere i think i have a song for this
totallynotreadershhh you have a song for everything.
hiiidrayed i'm so sorry lovely 😞
totallynotreadershhh no i'm fine. i'm great. i'm so so fine and cool and relaxed and calm.
hiiidrayed you poor thing 😖
ableachandtone why aren't you lesbian at this point?
totallynotreadershhh idek
itsananxietypen break up wit him yung ho
totallynotreadershhh inspiring words charli
stayathomeandeatchips actually it's on sight when i see him icl
totallynotreadershhh PLEASE HE NEEDS HIS ASS HUMBLED
yourusername ၊|၊|၊ We Almost Broke Up Again Last Night... Sabrina Carpenter
liked by emmachamberlin, charlidamelio and others!
─ diva down 🤣🤣🤣
emmachamberlin you still hot tho🙏😭
yourusername you right you right
user oh my god ❤️ liked by author!
user she unfollowed adapt AND tara ☹️
user the fact her and tara were friends probably made it worse
user HER AND TARA WERE FRIENDS?
user yeah
user oh my god, i'd never feel more betrayed in my life after that
charlidamelio let's go out ❤️ liked by author!
quenblackwell FUCK that man ❤️ liked by author!
user the fact adapt saw this on stream
user what?
user she didn't block him but she unfollowed him and it came up on his recommended
user oh my god.
tanamongeau did she know about him?
yourusername yep. everything. told her every detail i knew about him and how i felt about him. it's okay tho. I'm totally fine. 🫠
yourusername ၊|၊|၊ Manchild... Sabrina Carpenter
liked by charlidamelio, quenblackwell, and others!
─ you're a fucking coward and i would have never done this to you.
user not the maddy perez quote ☹️ ❤️ liked by author!
user i can't remember when she says this, what scene is it?
user it's the scene when maddy finds out cassie has been sleeping with nate
user oh.
charlidamelio VERY fitting song ❤️ liked by author!
quenblackwell i know that cig tasted GOOOD
yourusername best cig i've ever had
user oh he done fucked up ❤️ liked by author!
emmachamberlin hope you're doing okay this morning babes
yourusername i couldn't feel the burn at one point, if that gives any indication
emmachamberlin shittttt
sabrinacarpenter never thought of a situation more fitting for this song ❤️ liked by author!
user adapt saying nothing about this on stream when the entire chat's asking about it just proves he knows he was in the wrong.
yourusername ၊|၊|၊ Go Go Juice... Sabrina Carpenter
liked by fazeadapt, sabrinacarpenter, and others!
─ howsmmm call? do you me still love?
user why is HE liking 🙂
yourusername 🤫
user WHAT DID YOU DO????
sabrinacarpenter you had too much go go juice ❤️ liked by author!
user GIRL. ❤️ liked by author!
quenblackwell you have no backbone
yourusername i like tattooosssss it's unfairrr
user i feel so bad for her☹️
user imagine having the whole internet also watching you getting played, i'd never recover
user i'd never date again
user fr
kenzieziegler you'll never be left unattended EVER again ❤️ liked by author!
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EXTRA, EXTRA, READ ALL ABOUT IT adapt x fem!reader
2.5k + words , angst , adapt lowk being a bitch
title - earrings by Malcom Todd
series mlist
Reader’s phone had been nonstop lately. Notifications piling up faster than she could clear them.
After Tara left her flat that night, Reader had blocked her on everything without hesitation. Instagram, Twitter, TikTok, even her number. Gone.
Alex was different, though.
She’d unfollowed him on every platform, but she hadn’t blocked him. Not yet. Part of her hated herself for leaving that door open, but another part still wanted an explanation. If he even had one to give.
People online had noticed almost immediately, of course. Fans noticed everything. Especially when mutual friends started quietly unfollowing Tara too. Maybe it was loyalty. Maybe people were just nosy and obsessed with checking who followed who. Either way, people were talking.
Reader tried not to look at any of it anymore.
She reached for her wine bottle, refilling her glass before setting it back down on the coffee table. Her phone lit up again beside her.
This time, one name caught her attention immediately.
Alex.
I think we should talk.
Reader stared at the message for a long moment before taking a slow breath and typing back a simple:
Sure.
The reply came almost instantly.
omw
Reader scoffed quietly under her breath and rolled her eyes, tossing her phone onto the sofa cushion beside her before standing up. She started absentmindedly tidying things around the flat—moving blankets back into place, throwing away takeaway containers, wiping down the counter.
Not for Alex.
Just because she didn’t want him seeing how badly she’d been falling apart without him.
Fifteen minutes later, the building buzzer went off.
Her stomach dropped immediately.
A lump formed in her throat so quickly it almost hurt, and her eyes started burning with tears she refused to let fall. Not yet. Not while he was here.
Reader pressed the button to let him up, then waited.
And waited.
Until finally, there was a knock at the door.
She let out a shaky breath before opening it.
For a second, neither of them said anything. They just exchanged awkward little smiles that didn’t reach either of their eyes.
Then Alex stepped inside like he’d done it a hundred times before. Like showing up at her flat late at night for complicated conversations had become part of their routine.
Reader shut the door behind him and leaned back against it automatically, arms folded tightly across her chest. For a moment, she considered staying there just to stop him leaving before they actually talked properly.
Because this time, he wasn’t escaping it.
Hopefully.
“So…” Alex started awkwardly.
“So…” Reader echoed.
She cleared her throat, suddenly finding the pattern of her wooden flooring incredibly interesting.
“Why’d you unfollow me?” he asked quietly.
Reader looked up at him finally. “Because… because you never stopped her.”
Alex rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. “Right. I just… I never knew how to without making it weird on stream. With chat there and everything, y’know?”
“Yeah,” Reader muttered flatly.
A heavy silence settled between them again before Alex spoke first.
“Look… I think maybe it’s better if we break… whatever this is off.” He gestured vaguely between them. “I don’t think it’s working.”
Reader let out a quiet laugh, though there was no amusement in it. “I think it was doomed from the beginning.”
Alex frowned slightly. “What?”
“You never wanted to admit what we had publicly,” Reader said. “And you never wanted to make anything official either.”
“I thought—”
“What?” she interrupted. “That you were protecting me?”
Alex stayed quiet.
“Because that’s not how you protect someone, Alex,” Reader continued, her voice softer now but no less hurt. “And it wasn’t your decision to make on your own. We could’ve talked about it.”
“I’m sorry.”
Reader looked at him carefully. “Are you actually sorry? Or are you just saying that because this blew up?”
His expression tightened slightly. “No. I really am sorry. Truthfully.”
Reader swallowed hard, trying to ignore the ache building in her chest again.
“Okay then,” she said quietly. “Look me in the eye and tell me there’s absolutely nothing going on between you and Tara.”
Alex froze completely. Silence filling her flat.
It only lasted a second, maybe two, but it was enough. More than enough.
Reader felt her stomach twist painfully as she watched his expression change. The hesitation. The slight panic behind his eyes. The way his mouth opened like he wanted to speak, only for nothing to come out immediately.
And somehow, that hurt more than if he’d just admitted it straight away.
Reader let out a quiet laugh under her breath, though it sounded hollow. “Wow.”
“No, it’s not—”
“Don’t,” she interrupted quickly, holding a hand up. “Please don’t insult me by lying to my face right now.”
Alex dragged a hand over his jaw, visibly stressed. “I’m not trying to lie to you.”
“Then answer the question.”
Another silence.
Reader could actually feel her heartbeat pounding in her chest while she waited.
Finally, Alex looked away first.
“It’s complicated.”
Reader stared at him in disbelief before laughing again, this time sharper. “Complicated?” she repeated. “You’ve got to be joking.”
“I didn’t mean for anything to happen.”
“But something did happen,” Reader snapped immediately. “That’s the whole problem.”
Alex sighed heavily. “Nothing serious happened between us.”
Reader shook her head slowly. “You know what’s funny? That’s almost worse.”
“What?”
“Because you’re acting like this all just accidentally happened to you. Like you had no control over any of it.” Her eyes burned again, but she forced herself to keep speaking. “You let her flirt with you for weeks. You let me sit there looking stupid while everyone online figured it out before I did.”
Alex looked genuinely miserable now, but Reader couldn’t find it in herself to care properly anymore. She was too exhausted. Too angry. Too hurt.
“I cared about you,” he said quietly.
Reader swallowed hard at that. Past tense.
Cared.
Not care.
Something in her chest seemed to crack a little more at the wording alone.
“You know,” she said softly, “I think that’s what hurts the most.”
Alex frowned slightly. “What?”
“That I actually believed you.” She laughed weakly to herself, shaking her head. “I defended you to people. Constantly. Even after the first time this happened.”
“Reader—”
“No, let me finish.” Her voice trembled now despite how hard she was trying to keep it steady. “I kept convincing myself that maybe you were just awkward. Maybe you didn’t know how to set boundaries. Maybe all those clips online were being blown out of proportion.”
She looked at him properly then, eyes glossy with tears she was finally struggling to hold back.
“But deep down, I think I already knew.”
Alex opened his mouth again, but Reader shook her head before he could speak.
“I just didn’t want to be right.”
The flat went quiet again after that.
Not the comfortable kind of silence they used to have when Alex stayed over too late and they’d both ended up half-asleep on the sofa. This silence felt tense. Heavy. Like there were too many things left unsaid crowding the room.
Alex looked like he wanted to say something, but Reader was too emotionally drained to sit through another excuse.
Finally, he spoke anyway. “I did care about you.”
Reader’s face tightened immediately at the wording again.
“Did,” she repeated quietly. “You keep talking about us like it’s already over.”
Alex looked down for a second before rubbing at the back of his neck. “Maybe because I know I messed this up beyond fixing.”
Reader swallowed hard. Part of her wanted to argue with him. A stupid part of her still wanted him to fight for this properly. To tell her none of it mattered and that he wanted her.
But he wasn’t saying any of that.
Instead, he just looked guilty.
And Reader was starting to realise there was a massive difference between someone feeling guilty and someone regretting what they’d actually done.
“You know what the worst thing is?” she asked quietly.
Alex looked up at her again. “What?”
“You made me feel insane.” Her voice shook slightly now. “Every time I got upset about Tara flirting with you, I ended up convincing myself I was overreacting because you’d act like nothing was happening.”
“I wasn’t trying to gaslight you—”
“I know,” Reader cut in tiredly. “That’s the sad part. I genuinely think you’re just that emotionally clueless.”
Alex actually winced a little at that.
Reader laughed softly under her breath and wiped quickly beneath her eyes before any tears could properly fall. “God, this is embarrassing.”
“It’s not embarrassing.”
“Yes, it is,” she said immediately. “Because I let this go on for months. I sat around waiting for you to finally call me your girlfriend while you acted single online whenever it suited you.”
“That’s not fair.”
Reader stared at him. “Isn’t it?”
Alex opened his mouth, then closed it again.
Exactly.
Reader shook her head slowly and walked past him into the kitchen, mostly because standing too close to him suddenly felt overwhelming. She grabbed her wine glass from the counter and took a long sip before turning back towards him.
“I think part of me kept hoping you’d eventually choose me properly,” she admitted quietly. “Not privately. Not behind closed doors. Publicly.”
Alex’s expression softened slightly. “Reader…”
“But you never did,” she finished for him.
The look on his face somehow made it worse, because he looked upset hearing it. Like he knew she was right.
Reader let out a shaky breath and looked away from him again.
“I don’t even think Tara’s the main reason I’m hurt anymore,” she admitted. “I think she just forced me to realise what this actually was to you.”
Alex went still at that.
And the fact he still didn’t deny it told Reader everything she needed to know.
“I think you should go.”
The words came out quieter than Reader expected, but they still seemed to hit Alex hard enough to make him visibly tense.
“Reader—”
“Don’t,” she interrupted immediately, shaking her head. “Don’t suddenly try to fight for this now.”
Alex stared at her silently.
“You had every chance to fight for whatever we were when I first asked if there was anything between you and Tara,” Reader continued, her voice growing shakier the longer she spoke. “And you didn’t. So don’t start now just because I’m finally telling you to leave.”
For a moment, neither of them moved.
Then Alex spoke so quietly she almost didn’t hear him.
“I loved you.”
Reader felt like the air had been knocked out of her chest.
“What—?” she breathed. Then her expression twisted immediately into disbelief. “No. No, you do not get to say that right now.”
“I mean it.”
“Well, maybe you should’ve meant it sooner,” Reader snapped, tears finally spilling over despite how hard she’d been trying to stop them. She wiped angrily at her face before looking back at him. “You don’t get to tell me you loved me while I’m trying to let go of you. That’s not fair, Alex.”
“I didn’t know how to handle any of this.”
“And I did?” Reader laughed weakly, shaking her head. “Do you think this has been easy for me?”
Alex looked devastated now, but Reader forced herself not to focus on it. Because if she looked at him for too long, she knew she’d cave. She knew she’d start trying to comfort him, somehow, even after everything.
“I cared about you so much,” she admitted softly. “More than I probably should have.”
“I know.”
“No, I don’t think you do.” Her voice cracked slightly. “Because if you did, you wouldn’t have let me feel this disposable.”
Alex’s face fell at that. “You were never disposable to me.”
Reader swallowed hard. “Then why did I always feel like I was waiting around for you to finally decide I was worth claiming?”
He didn’t answer.
That silence again. Always the silence.
Reader laughed bitterly under her breath and looked away, staring out towards the dark windows of her flat instead.
“You know what’s horrible?” she whispered. “Part of me still wants you to say the right thing. Even now.”
Alex stepped slightly closer. “Reader…”
“But you can’t,” she finished quietly. “Because if you really loved me the way I loved you, none of this would’ve happened in the first place.”
The room felt painfully still after that.
Alex stood there for another few seconds, like he was hoping Reader would suddenly change her mind. Like she’d break first and tell him to stay.
But she didn’t.
Reader kept her arms folded tightly across her chest, almost like she was physically holding herself together at this point.
Finally, Alex let out a slow breath and gave a small nod.
“Okay,” he said quietly.
The simple response hurt far more than Reader expected it to.
No fighting harder for her. No last attempt to fix things. Just okay.
Reader pressed her lips together tightly, trying to ignore the fresh sting behind her eyes as Alex grabbed his hoodie from the back of the sofa.
He moved around her flat carefully, awkwardly, like he suddenly felt out of place there. Which was strange considering how much time he’d spent here over the past few months.
Movie nights. Takeaways at two in the morning. Falling asleep halfway through random YouTube videos.
All those little routines suddenly felt painfully temporary.
Alex stopped by the front door, his hand resting against the handle for a moment before he looked back at her.
“I never wanted this to happen,” he admitted quietly.
Reader gave a small shrug, though it felt stiff. “But it did.”
He swallowed hard and nodded once more.
Another silence stretched between them.
Then, before Reader could fully prepare herself for it, Alex crossed the small space between them and pulled her into a hug.
Reader froze instantly.
For a second, she almost pushed him away. She wanted to. She probably should have.
But the second his arms wrapped around her properly, everything in her chest cracked open again. Because it still felt familiar. Still felt safe. And that was the worst part of all.
Alex held her carefully, like he already knew this would be the last time he ever got to.
Reader shut her eyes tightly, trying not to cry again, but she could already feel tears slipping down her cheeks anyway.
“I’m sorry,” Alex whispered against the top of her head.
Reader laughed weakly through the tears. “You’ve said that already.”
“I know.” His voice sounded rough now too. “I just… I needed you to know I meant it.”
Reader swallowed hard before finally pulling back slightly, just enough to look at him properly. His eyes were red now too.
For a horrible moment, she almost asked him to stay.
The thought hit her so suddenly it scared her.
Because despite everything, some part of her still loved him enough to forgive him if he gave her even the slightest reason to.
But she knew that would destroy her in the long run.
So instead, Reader stepped back completely, putting distance between them again.
“You should go before I change my mind,” she whispered.
Alex stared at her for a long moment before giving one final nod.
Then he walked out the door.
Reader knew he wasn’t coming back. Not this time.
taglist (comment/pm if you wanna be added): @ireaiiyiikecats , @willuver , @i-get-obsessed-fast , @rosayposay
THE BOY WHO I LOVE WHO'S NOW IN LOVE WITH YOU adapt x fem!reader
1.7k words, angst ig, that's it really. Lots of scoffing.
title - cindy lou who - Sabrina Carpenter
series mlist
Reader felt like she was trapped in some kind of time loop. Like the universe kept replaying the exact same situation over and over again until it finally got the reaction it wanted out of her.
Because the same thing that had happened last week was happening again.
She was stuck in the exact same position — watching Tara flirt with Alex while thousands of people watched along with her. Watching Alex awkwardly laugh it off without actually stopping it. He never flirted back properly, but he never shut it down either. It was like he didn’t know how to handle it without making things uncomfortable or embarrassing himself online.
Or maybe he liked the attention more than he let on.
Reader sighed quietly, swiping out of Twitter before tossing her phone somewhere onto her bed. She stared blankly at the ceiling, her thoughts moving far too fast for her to keep up with.
Why had she ever agreed to the stupid rules of whatever this thing with Alex was?
Why had she believed him the first time this happened?
Why hadn’t she just ended things completely?
Her phone buzzed somewhere in the sheets.
A second later, the buzzer to her building went off too, loud enough to drag her out of her thoughts. Someone was downstairs wanting to come up.
Reader sat up slowly and rubbed at her face before pressing the button to let them in. She’d ordered food earlier, so she assumed it was that.
A few minutes later, there was a knock at her door.
She pulled it open — then nearly slammed it shut again the second she saw Tara standing there.
“What are you doing here?” Reader asked sharply.
Tara blinked at her. “We were supposed to hang out, remember?”
She even had a smile on her face. Like nothing had happened. Like she hadn’t spent the past week openly flirting with the guy Reader had told her absolutely everything about.
Reader let out a short scoff. Part of her wanted to tell Tara to leave immediately. But another part of her needed answers first.
So, slowly, she stepped aside and let her in.
The second Tara walked through the doorway, Reader pushed the door shut harder than necessary and leaned back against it, blocking the exit before Tara could escape the conversation already building in Reader’s head.
“Why him?”
Tara frowned slightly. “What?”
“Don’t what me. You know exactly who I’m talking about.”
A brief silence passed.
“...What about him?” Tara asked carefully.
Reader stared at her in disbelief. “Why him, Tara? Why specifically him?”
Tara crossed her arms defensively. “I can’t control who I like.”
“Yeah, but you can control what you do about it,” Reader shot back immediately. “Especially when your best friend has told you everything about that guy. How she feels about him, all the dates they’ve been on, all the late-night calls—”
“But you’re not even dating.”
The words hit harder than Reader expected.
Because technically, Tara wasn’t wrong.
They weren’t dating. Not officially. But they also weren’t just friends either. They were stuck somewhere in the middle — in that messy grey area between a situationship and a real relationship that Reader was starting to hate more every day.
Still, even if Tara had been in her position, Reader knew she never would have done this to her. She wouldn’t have entertained it for a second.
“You’re such a coward,” Reader muttered bitterly.
Tara’s expression fell instantly. “What?” she said quietly, eyes beginning to gloss over.
“Oh, don’t start crying,” Reader scoffed, rolling her eyes as she folded her arms tighter across her chest. “I would never have done this to you. Never. I wouldn’t have even thought about it.”
Tara looked down at the floor, blinking quickly, but Reader barely cared anymore. The hurt sitting in her chest was far louder than any guilt she might have felt.
“Why?” Reader asked again, her voice cracking slightly despite how hard she was trying to keep herself together. “Why? I’m so confused right now.”
Tara stayed quiet.
Reader let out a shaky laugh, dragging both hands through her hair in frustration before looking back at her. “Please. Please just tell me why you’re doing this.”
Still nothing.
“I want to know,” Reader continued, her chest tightening painfully with every word. “There has to be a reason for it. And don’t sit there and give me some pathetic ‘I don’t know’ because you do know. You wouldn’t have done all this if you didn’t.”
Tara swallowed hard, her glossy eyes fixed somewhere near the floor instead of Reader.
Reader shook her head slowly, disbelief written all over her face. “Do you know how humiliating this feels?” she asked quietly. “Watching clips of my best friend flirting with the guy I—” She cut herself off, jaw tightening. “The guy you know I care about.”
Tara finally looked up. “It wasn’t supposed to happen like this.”
Reader laughed again, but there was no humour in it this time. “Then how was it supposed to happen?”
“I didn’t mean for feelings to happen,” Tara admitted softly. “I tried to ignore it.”
“But you didn’t,” Reader snapped immediately. “You leaned into it. On stream, in front of everyone.”
“It wasn’t serious—”
“Don’t,” Reader interrupted sharply. “Don’t stand there and try to downplay it now. You knew exactly what you were doing every single time you flirted with him.”
Tara opened her mouth, then closed it again when nothing came out.
And somehow, that silence hurt worse than any excuse could have.
Reader stared at her for a long moment before speaking again, quieter this time. “Was any of it real?”
Tara frowned. “What?”
“Our friendship,” Reader said, her voice trembling slightly now despite herself. “Because I can’t imagine doing this to someone I actually cared about.”
Tara looked genuinely hurt by that, but Reader couldn’t bring herself to feel bad anymore. Not when her stomach still twisted every time she thought about those clips online. Not when she’d spent days feeling embarrassed, angry, and stupid all at once.
“I trusted you,” Reader said softly. “That’s the worst part.”
“Every single little detail I knew about him, I told you,” Reader said, her voice quieter now, but somehow sounding even more hurt because of it. “And then, with all of that information, you practically threw yourself at him the first chance you got. I genuinely can’t believe that.”
She ran a hand roughly through her hair, fingers catching slightly in the strands. At this point, she felt stressed enough to pull every strand out one by one.
“I can’t believe you,” she muttered, shaking her head. “Honestly, I don’t even know if I’m going insane, or if you’re insane.”
Tara’s lips parted slightly. “I… I…”
Reader laughed bitterly and held a hand up to stop her. “You… you what?” she asked. “You didn’t mean it? You didn’t care? You ‘couldn’t help it’? Which one is it, Tara?”
Tara looked completely overwhelmed now, standing awkwardly in the middle of Reader’s flat with watery eyes and flushed cheeks, but Reader couldn’t bring herself to soften. Not yet.
Maybe not ever.
“What did I ever do to you that made you want to hurt me this badly?” Reader asked, her voice finally starting to shake properly. “Seriously. What did I do?”
“I wasn’t trying to hurt you,” Tara whispered.
“But you did.”
The words came out instantly. Sharp. Firm.
Reader could feel tears burning at the backs of her eyes now, which only frustrated her more. She hated crying during arguments. Hated looking weak in front of someone who had already hurt her this badly.
“You knew how insecure this whole thing with Alex already made me,” she continued. “You knew how confusing it’s been from the start. And instead of helping me through it, you made it worse.”
Tara wiped quickly at her face. “I didn’t plan for any of this to happen.”
“But it did happen,” Reader shot back. “And you kept letting it happen over and over again.”
Silence filled the flat again. Heavy and uncomfortable.
Reader stared at Tara for a moment before laughing quietly to herself, though it sounded more exhausted than amused.
“The worst part is,” she admitted softly, “if some random girl online did this, I honestly think it would hurt less.”
Tara’s expression crumpled slightly.
“Because I expected better from you.”
Reader’s flat fell completely silent.
The kind of silence that felt heavy enough to press down on both of them. So quiet it almost felt like you could hear their hearts beating.
Tara didn’t say anything.
Not that Reader expected her to. Tara had never been good with confrontation, especially not when it came from someone she cared about. Normally, Reader would have softened by now. Normally she would have stepped in to ease the tension, to make things less uncomfortable for Tara.
But this time, she couldn’t bring herself to do it.
Reader let out a quiet scoff and shook her head before slowly beginning to nod to herself, like part of her had expected this outcome from the beginning.
“Get out,” she muttered.
She pushed herself away from the door and pulled it open, standing to the side for someone she used to consider one of her closest friends.
“Tara, just— just get out. Please.” Her voice sounded tired now more than angry. Drained. “And don’t contact me again. Ever, preferably.”
Tara looked up sharply at that, tears finally spilling down her cheeks properly. “Reader…”
“No.” Reader shook her head immediately. “Don’t do that.”
“I don’t want to lose you over this.”
Reader laughed quietly under her breath, though it sounded completely humourless. “You should’ve thought about that before.”
Tara stood there for another few seconds, like she was hoping Reader would change her mind. Like she was waiting for her to take it back and tell her to stay.
But Reader didn’t.
Eventually, Tara wiped at her face with the sleeve of her hoodie and walked slowly towards the door. She paused beside Reader for a second, hesitating like she wanted to say something else.
“I really am sorry,” she whispered.
Reader stared straight ahead instead of looking at her. “Good for you.”
The words sounded colder than she intended, but she was too hurt to care anymore.
A second later, Tara walked out into the hallway.
Reader shut the door immediately behind her and locked it before sliding down against the wood with a shaky breath.
And for the first time since seeing those clips online, she finally let herself cry.
taglist (comment/pm if you wanna be added): @ireaiiyiikecats , @willuver , @i-get-obsessed-fast , @rosayposay @eeveso
IF THEY LIKE YOU, THEY'LL JUST LIE TO THEMSELVES adapt x fem!reader
short one, 500ish words, sort of angst, i have two other chapters that i REALLY wanna post but shouldn't because I fear I might experience burnout
title - lie to girls by Sabrina Carpenter
series mlist
Reader hadn’t even known why she’d agreed to whatever this thing with Alex was supposed to be. She couldn’t even properly call it a relationship.
It was more like a situationship with relationship rules. No labels, but they were exclusive. They texted constantly, called each other nearly every night, went out on dates, acted like a couple in every way that mattered—yet Alex still refused to admit there was anything between them publicly. Even when half of his Twitch viewers already seemed convinced there was.
She hated it.
But what she hated even more were all the clips flooding her feed of him—“Faze Adapt”—and Tara. Tara Yummy. Her best friend Tara. Tara, who Reader had told absolutely everything about Alex to. Every feeling she had, every conversation they’d had, every little detail she’d learnt about him over the past few months. If it involved Alex, Tara knew about it.
And now Tara was flirting—actually flirting—with him. On stream. In front of thousands of people. On the internet, where one moment could be clipped, reposted, and talked about forever no matter how badly someone wanted it gone.
Reader felt her chest tighten painfully. Her heart skipped, but not in the nervous, giddy way it usually did whenever Alex’s name came up. This felt sharp. Angry. Betrayed.
She bit the inside of her cheek as she kept scrolling through Twitter threads, each one filled with more clips from the stream. More laughing. More teasing comments. More moments that looked far too comfortable to just brush off.
Finally, she stopped on one thread and took a screenshot. It wasn’t even worse than the others—honestly, they all blurred together after a while—but this one had pushed her over the edge.
She sent it to Alex with a simple:
???
Reader stared at her phone, waiting. Nearly two minutes passed before the typing bubble finally appeared. Then vanished. Then appeared again.
Eventually, a message came through.
It’s not what you think.
Reader almost scoffed. Almost.
Maybe he was telling the truth. Streamer fans loved twisting things, clipping moments out of context, trying to “bait” drama out of nothing. Maybe that was all this was.
Another message appeared.
She came over for Lacy’s stream. He left the room for a bit, then she joined my stream and started flirting. I genuinely didn’t know what to do.
Reader let out a long breath and rubbed a hand over her face, exhaustion settling heavily in her chest.
Then she exited her messages with Alex and opened her contacts instead. Her thumb scrolled quickly until she found Tara’s name. She pressed call immediately.
It rang once.
Twice.
Three times.
Voicemail.
Reader called again.
And again.
And again.
Fifteen times in total. Fifteen different chances for Tara to answer and explain herself. Fifteen chances to say it wasn’t what it looked like. To defend herself. To tell Reader there was some misunderstanding behind all those clips.
But she never answered.
Not once.
And that was the moment Reader realised Tara knew exactly what she was doing.
taglist (comment/pm if you wanna be added): @ireaiiyiikecats , @willuver , @i-get-obsessed-fast , @rosayposay
