Post-Covid Feeding Frenzy
I’ve blogged a few times recently about how hesitant I was and weird I felt coming out of Covid - and I was hesitant, and it did feel weird. But I am glad to have learned that I wasn’t alone. I think a bunch of us have been having to figure out how to get out into the world again. Sexually and otherwise.
But the more I’ve gotten out the more I’ve been feeling back in the groove, and I think most of my friends are feeling the same. One of my vanilla couple friends mentioned that Steven Colbert is predicting this will be the summer of orgies, and I think he’s right. Although I’m not sure he intended it in quite the same literal sense as I do (but who knows, perhaps he did!)
I’m finding women (in particular) and people (in general) are coming out of the woodworks. Sexually speaking. I’m matching at a higher rate in my online apps than I can remember since I started on this non-monogamy journey over 10 years ago. Women who prior to Covid only wanted vanilla, one-on-one sex are interested in threesomes and sex clubs. Women who used to play hard to get are bombarding me with attention.
About two weeks ago I made a great couple match on Feeld, which until now has yielded exactly one good match (the first weekend I signed up for it years ago). Kristy and I had a lovely date with our new couple and we are going to be double dating with them to Twist, my favorite local sex club, when it re-opens in mid June.
I had one of these “too good to be true” matches on Tinder, which is usually an indication that the match isn’t going anywhere (because she’s probably an 18 year old boy in Indonesia trying to steal my credit card or my identity). She was attractive with with a knockout smile and a stunning body and her profile more or less read “I’m looking for sex.” Well, it turned out she was legit, and that was an amazing night. But I think I’ll have to blog that full story later.
I’ve been matching a ton on Hinge, and while it’s an ostensibly vanilla dating app, I’ve come across a bunch of women who have been hot to trot. Cooped up for a year without sex and dying for human connection and sexual touch. which of course, I’m happy to provide.
So big of me.
But I think the anecdote that most epitomizes what I’m seeing as the bacchanalian turn our society is now taking (or at least the slice of it that I come across) came about a week ago. My friends Marina and Elise and I have a threesome set up for Thursday this week. It was actually Marina’s idea; I had been talking to her about getting together and she said “we should make it a threesome with Elise as well.”
Gotta love that spirit.
THEN, about a week ago, Marina sends Elise and me a message asking if we would be okay if her friend Abbi were to join as well. Elise’s response was “fine by me, the more the merrier but only if Dean feels he’s up to it.” and my reply was “hell yeah, let’s do it.” Keep in mind that Abbi had never met Elise or me at all.
Elise does know that I have a thing for multiple women, as in more than two, and she and I have a post-Covid pact to help throw each other gang bangs - in her case with three or four guys, and in mine with three or four women. So, Elise rocks.
Now Abbi, it turns out, is not a lifestyler. She is curious and interested, and of course sexual, and her biking friend Marina apparently piqued her curiosity. But I’m convinced that two years ago she would probably have never dreamed of doing anything like this. She tells us she hasn’t been with a woman before, and is new to this space. But there she goes, throwing her hat into an MFFF opportunity. Just because it’s new and different and fun.
And a life experience, which the past year has taught us not to take for granted.
I think that’s going to be my new motto for 2021: take nothing for granted.