I've already read most of the Phobos x reader fics in here aside from the yandere ones since those make me uncomfortable and no more have been written... So I'll fucking make them myself /lh
Long so it'll be under the cut
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"Peanut Butter" [Phobos x Reader, fic]
Oh god oh fuck oh god oh fuck Phobos is SO gonna kill you three fuuuuuuck-
To put your curiosity at bay, you, Hofnarr, and Crackpot decided to prank the Director by leaving peanut butter bottles ALL AROUND HIS FUCKING OFFICE
And not even like spreading it around, just placing peanut butter containers in the most random places... aside from his desk, the desk it overloaded with containers
Right now, you and the boys are hanging out in Christoff's office, Hofnarr is freaking out about how funny it's gonna be when Phobos sees it and how you all are so fucking dead, Crackpot is also freaking out but more about how Phobos is going to hate him forever and fire him or worse! Drama queen.. you managed to access one of the tower's cameras and is trying to find the right one that gets a view of the Director's office, one of the cameras that is heavily password coded by Phobos's personal request
Meanwhile, Christoff is silently watching you three run about, he knows even if he didn't play a part, he'd get in trouble anyway just for letting you guys hide in here, he snarled
"May the two of you calm down? It's not like it's that big of a de-"
"got it!" You interrupted accidentally with a victory fist pump before giving Christoff a sheepish smile when you realized you interrupted him
"sorry Christoff-"
The taller man grumbled but nodded, reassuring you it was fine, the other two scrambled up beside you, watching the screen intently, Phobos was still nowhere to be seen
Crackpot put his hands up to his helmet, holding it in a panic "ooooooh we're dead! We're doomed when he sees-"
"Crackpot, can you chill? You've been repeating that for the past hour now, we'll be fine." You reassured with furrowed eyebrows, Crackpot was actually shaking, but finally nodded after a small pause, taking deep breaths. Christoff eventually came around to watch as well, he wouldn't admit it but he was rather curious of what would happen
He glanced at his smaller friend who was starting to bite at his nails again, that godforsaken habit needs to stop before Hofnarr eats his own nails, he gently took Hofnarr's hand and put it down, the smaller scientist looked up at him and nodded a thank you, Christoff's hand now rested on Hofnarr's shoulder in reassurance things would be okay
You four watched the screen for a long while before Phobos finally arrived, not seeming to notice the containers yet- oh nevermind he kicked one of them accidentally, you watched him hum in confusion and looked down at the container rolling up to the others, he looked around his office slowly, looking at the empty spots on the bookshelves with peanut butter containers randomly placed around, more of the same containers scattered around the floor and his desk- OH his desk
I wasn't lying when I said it was loaded with peanut butter containers, there's even some piled on top of each other balanced on top of his cup of pens and pencils
You were all snickering behind the monitor because it was funny? yes, because you're all nervous about what he's gonna do next? also yes
The director stood silent before he walked over to his desk, AND SLAPPED THE SHIT OUT OF ONE OF THE CONTAINERS ON TOP OF THE INTERCOM MICROPHONE IT FUCKING BROKE AND FLEW OUT THE WINDOW WHADDAHELL-
Phobos grabbed the intercom mic and pressed the button, the speakers screeched as a deep sigh came through, you all looked expectantly, he knew exactly who was the culprit in this was
"... I want the four head Scientists in my office, NOW. That's an order."
And with that, the intercom was turned off, leaving you all on edge, aside Christoff, he knew something like this would happen. You closed off the cameras and you all left Christoff's office, Crackpot scurried off ahead, mumbling something about an apology or something, Hofnarr just stood quiet, fidgeting with his fingers, you looked at Christoff and Hofnarr beside you, feeling a sting of guilt hit you
You hesitated, guilt was written on your face "Boys I-.... I'm sorry for dragging you into this mess... it was my idea, I'll take all the blame for it."
"I-it's okay, [L/n]!" Hofnarr exclaimed, waving his hands rapidly with a small reassuring but nervous smile on his face "we knew it was a bad idea but still went with it! we're deserving of the blame too!... a-aside Christoff-"
Christoff simply grumbled, he hated getting tied to your shenanigans but who was him to complain, you both were his only friends, plus, Phobos hates him so he's bound to be tied to your punishment anyway
"it is fine. We'll simply do whatever our punishment quickly and be done with it in time to follow with our assignments to due." Christoff rationalized something obvious again, he always did this to put his mind in place
You still felt quite guilty as you four ascended to the Director's office, three of you internally hoping he wouldn't be too harsh over the harmless prank, and Christoff— of course— was simply deadpanning the whole way, he knew they were fucked but he will get to say that 'I told you so'
Crackpot of course, scurried ahead of you three to get there as soon as possible, you passed the g03lms protecting the entrance to his desk, saying their usual quotes once they saw you. By the time you three got there, Crackpot was already on his hands and knees and throwing millions of apologies and lies, saying how you forced him into participating and that he never wished to dirty the All Mighty God-Emperor's office... Of course he'd try to throw you under the bus
Phobos just sat in his chair, having piled the containers aside so his lanced hands could rest in the middle ildly, despite his covered face, it was clear he was... Displeased, to say the least. He sat up straight, but slightly hunched over, staring down at the masked doctor on the ground with an intense stare, his grip on his hands seemed to tighten as he slowly looked from the lamenting scientist on the ground to the three of you, tilting his head slightly as he waited you three do the required routine when entering his office
You and Hofnarr knelt down and bowed, you peeked at Christoff, who simply glared and crossed his arms at the director, he wasn't about to bend his honor over this bitchass figure head, you gently tugged on his pant leg, begging him to not make Phobos more angry then he already was
The taller scientist glanced at you before silently huffing and kneeling with a bow, you and Hofnarr gave him a small smile
The almost G03LM sized man still glared down at you, getting fed up of Crackpot's apologies
"Crackpot, shut your hole before I stich it shut." He boomed, making Crackpot and Hofnarr flinch, Crackpot immediately shut up with a squeaky 'Imsorrymygod-emperorsir-' and looked down at the ground, the poor anxiety filled scientist beside you was trembling, fearing the worst
There was a brief pause before Phobos sighed, rubbing his face over the bandages and leaned back on his chair, making the chair creak under his size
"... Whose... Brilliant idea, was this?" He questioned with a stern tone, you got up, still keeping your head down and hands behind your back
"I did, sir, I apologize in behalf of my colleagues, it was supposed to be something harmless, I did not for see your disliking over it, this will not happen again, I assure you, my Lord."
He stared at you, so intensely it started making you uncomfortable, he continued to stare directly at you as he spoke
"you three go get bags to pack all of these containers and bring to the cafeteria, they'll likely make use of it. Dr. [L/n], you stay here, I wish to have a word with you, we'll discuss punishment later, you three are dismissed."
That was never a good thing, you're fucked! You stood in place and lowered you head more, the boys got up, Crackpot rushed off before them as Christoff gave you a reassuring pat on the shoulder, Hofnarr wished you good luck silently as they left, once you heard the door open and close, you heard Phobos's chair creak again as he got up, slowly walking to the edge of the platform his office rested on, putting a hand on the railing
"G03LMs, you two are dismissed, await my command outside, I wish to have a word with my scientist in private." He waved a hand dismissively at the G03LMs that looked back up at the director, they bowed and headed out their proper door
Once they left, you heard the Director's steps coming close to you ever so slowly until he was directly in front of you, you still kept your eyes locked on the ground, his shoes came into vision
Another long pause, you both didn't say a thing as you stood before each other, uncomfortably close in each other's personal bubble
You had to say something and break the silence... But you feared what he'd do if you dared say a word....
".... S-sir I promise this won't re-" you tried to speak, he cut you off
"shut up and look at me."
You flinched and looked up as he demanded, a glint of fear in your eye, he was still staring you down just as before, though you felt something was up, it wasn't just a threatening angrily glare.. it felt much softer than before
".... I don't expect you to stop your little stunts, nor demand you do as such... Your stunt was quite amusing to see after an exhausting meeting with the Auditor." He mused, your fear developed into confusion
"ah... Thank you, sir, I'm truly relieved you don-"
"however." He cut you off again "that does not free you from punishment.~" he purred, grin large enough to show a bit of his sharp teeth under his bandages, you gulped as he leaned down in front of your face
He reached up a claw to play with your hair mindlessly, much for your confusion, he stood back up, glare now inexistent, with a much softer look
"say... Would accompanying me to check out that new Bar & Bakery place be suitable?... Let's say.. this Friday at.. 10pm sounds fine?"
".... I- I-..." That seemed to stun you for a few seconds, what the hell kind of punishment is this supposed to be???... Well, better then reciveing more work to your pile, you already have much on your plate, you don't need anymore, just run with it, I guess?
"I-... Believe so, Director... But- are you su-"
"well then, it's set. I'll pick you up by your dorm by then." He interrupted you AGAIN, for fuck sake you'd smack him if he wasn't your boss or could kill you in seconds
Before he could say another word, the door slid open to reveal Crackpot rushing in with a bunch of trash bags in his arms, passing straight by you both and getting to collecting the containers, Christoff and Hofnarr arrive shortly after with much less trash bags, they stop and look at you both
Phobos retracted his hand from your hair, returning it behind his back, he cleared his throat
"Get to work, peasants, I have business to take care of." He hissed, and with that, he walked off and out of his own office, leaving you four to clean up
"... W-what was that about??" Hofnarr stuttered, looking confusedly at you "what was what?-" you tried pretending nothing happened
"the- his hand playing with your hair??" He pointed at his own, furrowing his brows with a still confused expression. You could only shrug, pretending wouldn't be of help in your case and not know what that was about yourself
They still looked at you in confusion, even Crackpot turned to tilt his head, then shook it "are you peasants going to help me clean this up or not??"
Christoff rolled his eyes, you never understood why they hated each other, Hofnarr jolted slightly
"a-ah! Of course, Dr. Crackpot! Cmon guys..!" The smaller scientist handed you a trash bag and got to putting all the containers inside
Well... Today was something? Friday will be another can of worms to open...
Wait-
"Did Phobos just ask me out on a date??-"
"wHAT?!"
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Meh, not the best but I carried this on for way too long, not much but it's food
Xoana “You’re like. . . an angel to me. . . please, praise me in return for my worship. . .”
Your hair, sticky with tears, was brushed from your face. You pushed Eli's paw away. "Leave me alone," you whispered. Eli sighed and moved to sit behind you. "Go away." He sighed again and began to play with your hair.
"My sweetness, what do you wish of me?" He asked gently, pawing at your hair and back. You gulped back a sob. You didn't even know what you wanted. "My dear-"
"Just leave." you said softly, almost mumbling. Eli simply played with your hair some more, humming to himself.
"My beloved. . . you're like an angel to me. . ." he whispered, leaning close. You could feel his breath on your cheek. "please, praise me in return for my worship. . .”
