🪷 from the created system ask game (it was the one about advice to those interested in creating a headmate/system member, in case the emoji doesn't work)
" 🪷: What would you say to a singlet interested in willomancy/tulpamancy/paromancy/etc.? What would you say if they were a system? "
Ooh, this is a really good question, thanks for asking!! We'll try and give something that isn't the usual "creating a headmate is a serious decision, they're people and need to be treated as equals", etc etc etc stuff
🪷 Singlets: You've probably heard a few times that creating a headmate means you're responsible for treating them as a person and allowing them the same freedoms you have if possible. And it's true, a created headmate is a friend for life with a special, indescribable connection you'll always share. But something I didn't really consider back when I (thought I) was a singlet, is that your lives and interests will flow into each other because you live intertwined.
I have a respect and appreciation for coquette and lolita fashion because of our soulbond Casey when previously I avoided ""girly"" or frilly or extravagant things entirely; I go out more because our tulpa Badeline gets stir crazy faster than the hosts. I know it sounds like a lot right now, and yes some active work does need to be put in for balance to be kept, but the transition will be so natural you barely even notice it when it happens. I remember looking around our room one day and realizing about 40% of it has some influence from someone outside the Prism behing getting it.
Basically, don't forget that when properly nurtured, deciding on created plurality will change your life. It's a significant decision, but in our humble, biased opinion, it is worth it.
🪷 Systems: Hmmm this is a bit trickier and almost depends more on what kind of created headmate you're working with and what you're used to experiencing within your system. I'll try and encompass as many different things as I can think of. In general, based on what we've seen from ourselves and others, created members tend to operate a little differently than those of other origins.
For example, if you're familiar with that half-formed vague new headmate/alter/etc feeling, or the ability to sense your members' presences, those abilities are very similar to the feeling you'll experience while forming a created member such as a tulpa, willomate, etc.
If you're used to intense splitting, it's much more of a gentle and gradual process. "Head pressures" is the tulpamancy term for the headaches that a tulpa can induce during forming, so some pain is common, but in our experience it's much less bad if you have experienced polyconsciousness already.
Created headmates can also be a very influential way to grow skills such as communication, controlled fronting, headspace control, and breaking down dissociative barriers. When we're at our worst fog and unable to hear nearly anyone else at all, very often the only people able to reach front will be our tulpas and soulbonds. I very much credit our skills in communication, headspace control, switching, and more to having started our plural journey in tulpamancy. If you struggle with dissociative barriers there's a significant chance that a created headmate (especially a tulpa, willomate, paromate, etc) will be able to traverse those barriers better than others in the system.
Depending on if the created headmate is sourced and how connected they are to that source, they may take a while longer to form a web of certain opinions, likes, desires, etc than a system member that just pops in, formed in the background, split roughly, etc. Make sure to give them a broader timespan to fully "come together" than your other headmates, even if you do form them slowly.
That reminds me- most tulpamancy guides say a tulpa takes at least three months to a year to fully form, and most soulbonding guides require and intimate understanding of the character which takes time and dedication in of itself. Our experience with our first tulpa as a then-monoconscious pluregg took around six months to be fully communicative. However, after experience with polconscious plurality, we found the process only took a month or two to complete. We believe this is because a lot of tulpamancy is building the essential skills required, and bypassing that makes the process take a lot shorter. This lines up with accounts from other veteran tulpamancers (that aren't otherwise plural) who say that their second or third tulpas took a much shorter time than their first.
🪷 I hope any of this is helpful to people seeing this!!