#crz19

[drcknowledgeandpower]

An evening with eve ensler

about a month ago I attended the question and answer session given by eve ensler, the author of the Vagina Monologues. After hearing her speak, I went to actually see the Vagina Monologues the next day. The first time I had ever really experienced the concept of feminism was in our knowledge and power class, which made this event a great way for me to see what active, real life feminism looks like. What I got from this is that there are many ways to work towards gender equality, including writing plays or making art. For the most part, all of the feminists I had heard from were scholars writing articles. During the event, I was able to feel the frustration and passion that came from someone who had dedicated her life to feminism in a new way that was less scholarly but appealed to vast amounts of people.

what really drew me in to what eve ensler had to saw was her focus on telling the stories of individuals. Since writing the Vagina Monologues, she has spent her time traveling and empowering women around the world. She would tell stories of a young girl in south east asia, or a group of factory workers in bangladesh, and I could feel the amount of respect and reverence she had for these women. To me, it seems like eve ensler has fought the fight to end sexual violence for so long because she is in awe of women and the strength they can have in hard times.

[drcknowledgeandpower]

on giving science a gender

I thought the exercise we did in class, where we remade the metaphors used to describe the egg and the sperm was interesting and creative. It was a great way to consider gender roles and think about the idea of empowerment and what it means. However one question I’m left with is why do we feel the need to give these processes such detailed verbs, whether those verbs support female stereotypes or not? Instead of saying ‘penetrate’ or ‘choosing’ more scientifically accurate terms can be used, like bond formation and membrane division.

How is using such a metaphor a good way of describing science? When we were told that our newly made up metaphors didnt have to be scientifically accurate, I felt that such a move was not helping the cause of equality at all. How can we be taken seriously if our studies and ideas are not as rigorous as they should be?

[drcknowledgeandpower]

class discussion on the power of attributing power to appearance

After our class discussion today I realized that my own actions have subconsciously reflected the concept of power versus objectification. Without realizing it, I’ve noticed the differences in power attribution between men and women and these observations have definitely changed the way I portray myself. I tend to wear clothing and minimal makeup so that my appearance is as unnoticeable as possible. I normally relate this to the fact that I like simplicity and not worrying about trivial things, however I had to consider how I feel when I do put enough effort into my appearance to be noticeable. I get very uncomfortable when I think people are looking at me or think I am attractive. I think that if people think I am attractive, they will care less about my personality or the other qualities that actually give me power. When I see an attractive man, I never discount their personality or value only their looks. If anything, their looks increase the power their other characteristics give them. For some reason, I have never felt the same about myself. Hearing this discussion in class gave me more insight into why I get this uncomfortable feeling of being looked at and whether it is unfounded or not.

    If I do look nice, is it actually true that others will discount my positive attributes more than they would if I looked plain? I am not sure about this and haven’t studied peoples’ reactions to the few times where I have looked nice enough to say. Perhaps this lack of confidence is just in my head, and perhaps my discomfort with looking pretty goes deeper than what is discussed here. However, I was happy this topic was touched on in class because I certainly did learn more about why I act the way I do and what that says about me. 

[drcknowledgeandpower]

religion is personal

I really liked the format of the plenary last week, both in terms of the quality of the speakers and in the emphasis on student questions. There were two prominent themes to the speakers’ answers that I got a lot out of- the first was the concept of the female experience and the second was defining a person’s religion for themselves.

Each religious leader stressed the fact that they couldn’t really comment on what it meant to be a woman leader in a religious community. After all, how can they comment on the female perspective when it is the only perspective they have ever known? It is hard to divide leadership/religious/female experiences from each other. I thought this was a great point to make because it reminds us that while it is important to talk about women’s issues and how they affect our lives, it is just as important to recognize that we must move beyond the limitations we see and own the only perspective we can ever have, as ourselves.

Continuing on the topic of perspectives, I appreciated each speaker defining a person’s religion based on each person’s own life. Religious experience is different for everyone, and their emphasis on religion being a guide and a tool that is a supportive measure instead of a restrictive one is important. It reminds us that it is ok if we disagree with some of the rules or values our religion holds because we can mold our religious beliefs to what is best for us. This creates a much more inclusive, thoughtful, inspiring environment.

[drcknowledgeandpower]

plenary response- impostor syndrome

In response to our plenary on Wednesday, something that stuck with me was Caitlyn’s beginning comment on her feeling of the impostor syndrome when she was successful in her career. This comment stuck with me, and one of my classmates expanded on her point, saying that women experienced impostor syndrome while men did not. This comment made me pause because I don’t think states of mind like the impostor syndrome can only be attributed to one gender. Instead, we have to look at why people feel like they are impostors when they are successful? While in class we discussed the difference between this feeling and the feeling of doubt, which is a normal emotion, we never discussed further the roots of this state of mind. On one hand, I think it is a normal condition that a lot of people go through- there is a large dissonance between what we see as the intentions/actions of others versus our own. On the other hand, there are some people that do inherently have different views of themselves. One of my favorite popular psych books talks about those who explain things that happen to them as either due to outside causes or due to their own attributes. For example, if someone fails at something they can explain the failure in two ways- either because of situations outside of their control or because of some characteristic that they have that made them fail. In the same way, if someone succeeds at something, they can explain it to themselves in two main ways- either the success was due to outside factors that they had nothing to do with, or the success was due to their own work and traits. People who experience impostor syndrome are more likely to see failures as their own fault and successes as the doing of outside forces. This reasoning isnt necessarily something unchangeable or something someone is born with, so we have to ask how do these paths of reasoning come about? Is it due to societal comments about the strengths and weaknesses stereotyped to different genders? Possibly. It does not mean that only females are likely to experience impostor syndrome, but rather maybe they are just more likely to.

[drcknowledgeandpower]

Can we compare the transition from MLK to Stokely and Cleever to the rise of the Black Lives Matter movement? Based on what I saw in the documentary, what led to the shift in tactic was the realization of corruptness in the system and a similar realization has been growing today after the trials surrounding police violence. To get to the black panthers and the followers of people like Stokely, we see a population coming to realize just how corrupt the system is- if a peaceful man like Martin Luther King Jr is killed, along with many others in ‘68 that led to thoughts of conspiracy, how can anyone expect to get anywhere without demanding respect for themselves and fighting for themselves. The 60’s and 70’s were about empowerment, about the ideas that black people matter too and people are unwilling to hide under the conspiratorial nature that society and government is creating. I see a parallel in this to today’s movements- the idea that the way the current system runs isnt going to protect those it promises to protect. In order to talk about the role an artist has, I want to start off with a statement  Courtney Callender made in the documentary- “his falling in love with black things for a short period of time is essentially racist”. He says this about white america’s acceptance of black culture only when it is entertaining and that this fascination highlights the separatist nature and also the idea that black culture exists only for white entertainment.  This connected deeply with Beyonce’s performance for me-why would people have such strong negative reactions to her performance if this wasn’t true? I thought Beyonce’s performance was a good introduction to the idea that we need to remind everyone that black culture matters too- what was remarkable about her performance was not the performance itself but the reactions it got. I compare her performance to that of Kendrick Lamar’s at the Grammy’s. Kendrick’s performance spoke more clearly about the issues black people face today and he seems to me to be one of the major artists able to show a greater audience what the black experience is like in america. Kendrick’s music platform is based more around the black experience than Beyonce’s is and for me he represents a greater shift in overall understanding.

[drcknowledgeandpower]

questions for the racial caucus

Leaving class after our second meeting around the topic of race and ethnicity, I wished that we could have had a longer talk during the larger racial caucus. My hope is that we can establish a way to further the conversation, whether that is in class as part of other discussions that are about other topics or online over internet forums like this one. If the best way to talk about new points is over tumblr, is the question and answer format the best? The question I pose is- what do you think is the best way to help others that have not had your experiences learn to empathize with you as if they had? What are good questions for us to ask each other? Audre Lorde says that women, especially white women, are pressured by mainstream communications to not respond to racism. To counteract this, and to build a response, questions must be asked and the conversation must be furthered so that well thought out answers can be provided in response to racism.

[drcknowledgeandpower]

Normally I would describe my style and my actions as gender-neutral; I dress pretty androgynously and tend to put minimal effort into my appearance. I feel most comfortable when no one looks at me for what I look like but rather for what I’m saying. One tendency I do have though is to act pretty timidly- and while this is a gender neutral trait, for some reason I attribute this to being more of a feminine characteristic. Analyzing why I see timidity as more womanly is its own issue, but moving past that, I see characteristics of assertiveness and  confidence as more manly traits, or more specifically, traits I see most commonly in white heterosexual males that are financially secure. This is what I tried to embody this weekend. On Saturday I went to a premedical conference where I tried on mannerisms that were outside of my comfort zone. Instead of my normal timid and reserved self, I tried to open up my posture and act like someone more confident and sure of themselves than I am. I have heard of the ‘fake it until you make it’ strategy before and I guess this is what that is. I pushed myself to give my opinion or viewpoint more than I normally would, I looked up and smiled at more people while trying not to be afraid of eye contact, and I talked to more figures of authority. I corrected myself every time I reverted back to my hunched over state. If I could summarize these actions into one thought process, it would be ‘I am worthy of attention and respect and I have valuable opinions to contribute’. On an internal level, I would say I still felt like myself, I would just approach situations a little differently by being more aware of how I carried myself and what I would say and when I would decide it was a good idea for me to say something at all. It was exhausting because I was always thinking about how I was presenting myself and I was interacting with more people than I normally would. This was a shock to my system but it is something I am going have to learn to get stronger with anyway. Gender performativity is attached to the ways that people define themselves and others based on sex, race, class because in some ways it can boil down to confidence and the difference between how the people around you value you and your contributions versus how you yourself value you and your contributions. As a cisgender person, the privilege I had while doing this exercise centered on the fact that no one saw my actions as something to do with being a cisgendered person. In Monday’s reading by Peggy McIntosh, she goes over daily white privilege and here similar topics can be related to someone who is cisgender. We can act certain ways without those actions being tied to our cis-genderness.