I'm sorry to just barge in here incoherently but s2 planted a big old yennskier seed in my brain and my head keeps playing tad's 'ruin' (song) on loop in my head - 'we make universes out of bitten lips and broken hands' 'you make me brave' I'm just 🥺🥺 they!!
i've been thinking about this for so long you're absolutely right i listen to the song and think about them and cry :') here's a little thing i wrote while staring at the fireplace, idk what it is just vibes and pain and love 💜
wc: 922
There's something terrifying in the way he sometimes catches her eyes staring at the void.
Terrifying, making his skin prickle as though the roaring fire in her look burns his skin, as though the hollowness of it makes him nauseous and he trips and falls into the abyss, and falls, and falls.
Somehow he never catches her hand.
Sometimes she will stare at the void, and the void will echo back the heart-wrenching screams that don't dare escape her lips, lest she rids of them all and doesn't have spare for the rest of her life. Funny, how she knows her life will never be devoid of screams. Terrifying, how he knows too.
A glass falls gracelessly on the cold stone floor and echoes in the empty library.
Startled, he raises his head from the book he pretends to be reading, and looks ahead. Looks at her.
But she doesn't look back.
Instead, she stares at the shattered glass at her feet, unmoving like a soul trapped inside a marble statue. He notices her hands shaking.
"Yennefer..."
He tries, he really does. And he's so tired of trying, so tired of being the only one and yet there she is, in the middle of the room with a gaping hole wailing around her as the broken splinters still echo like sobs between the walls and something in their deafening melody reminds him of shadowed, unforgiving amber eyes, of childish protests, of blood and tears and fire and rage. Of her voice.
He doesn't speak again. His own breath makes him wince. Too loud.
In a parody of a laughter, she huffs. "It's always like that, isn't it?" Eyes still fixed on the splinters and her voice is barely more than a whisper, barely more than a spark that he fears is enough to explode. Shaking. "It always has to break. Everything." Shaking, she raises her eyes and meets his, and if he hadn't been stabbed before, now he thinks he knows what it feels like. She shakes her head, smiles. "Everything has to break."
There's something about fire now that makes him shiver, on the verge of shutting down, something that forms a sob in his throat and rips his skin apart. Yet he's always enjoyed staring at it, crackling, daring as though to pull him closer. He always goes.
With slow steps, he approaches, gazes still locked like an anchor on each other and he doesn't know who will be the first to fall if they separate, even for the barest of seconds. With slow steps, he reaches her, and reaches out.
On instinct.
He holds her face inside his hands, cold and scarred fingertips on soft skin, and it feels so familiar now, so fitting, and they're so close to falling. Yennefer smiles still. It's closer to a curving line, bloody and gaping, carved on her skin with a knife.
He's stepping on broken splinters. He doesn't care.
Her voice is trembling, dangerously calm, always dangerous. Always beautiful. "I need to get it right, Jaskier. For once." She swallows tears but she really doesn't need to, for he will wipe them off himself if needed to keep her higher before him still. Shaking, smiling. "Without breaking it. I need to get it right."
He's not thinking. Nothing, except that void, and he's falling and it's so warm suddenly, the emptiness around them, as though it's filling with the scattered pieces of each other. He's not thinking. He only leans in and presses his lips on hers, chapped and sweet from intruding cold, and feels her choking on a sob and yet, and yet she kisses back, and it's sweet and careful and desperate like a heart bleeding inside his mouth and he doesn't know if it's his or hers, he doesn't know anymore. He doesn't care.
For a moment, they part. For a moment, to ghost over each other. He smiles, and he thinks it's genuine. "Let's start with this then."
It's so bitter. Her eyes, he swears, oh, he's never seen such beautiful emptiness, such hollow overflow, and he can't stop staring, he can't stop falling. Yennefer breathes in, and he wants to give up all the air in his lungs for her to never choke again. "Already ruined," she whispers and the glass cracks under their feet. It sounds welcoming.
He shakes his head. "I don't care." Perhaps he should. Perhaps, but it's too much sorrow, too much longing in her gaze that begs him not to, for once, even if he breaks once more. He doesn't know when he stopped. Perhaps when his feet stopped touching the ground.
There's a glint in her eyes now, and it's probably the tears. It can be something else too. She looks at him as though she wants to swallow him whole and let him piece her back together, even if he's then to leave forever. A hint of a smirk on her lips, old and familiar. "Impossible. You're a coward."
He chuckles. So warm, the abyss, like the hands creeping up his arms, like the fingers stroking his skin, carving maps of another universe, like the seething tears that won't escape her eyes only much later. A coward. "I am," he admits, he's been a coward all his life, if an artist is ever one. Then, he rests their foreheads together. "Just not with you."
Out of habit, he would say, because the fire is daring, and he's only human. Always too close to the fire. Of that one, he's not afraid.
Yennefer smiles at him, finally, and he shivers, and finally catches her hand, and they fall.
Sorry for raiding your murderbot art tag a little bit but?? Your portrayal of the crew is legit so so good. I love it. It's making reading through the books so much more fun! :D
AAA thanks so much i'm glad to hear that!!! :DDD and no need to apologise wskjdks i very much appreciate it when ppl go through my art tags :'))
First dandelion of the year 😍😍 . . . #JumpOverDandeions #firstdandelion #Spring2021 #dandilion #damndelion https://www.instagram.com/p/CNoVdtmHr1aS4P-MJHYNmATGlr-2eUNbnAzj8w0/?igshid=1lc268p0gdyvi
