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You wanted a groovy dance party? You got a groovy dance party!

#vintage illustration #dancing #dance party #dance parties #groovy #groovy art

To dance

i) It starts confused. The lights dim, and music pours softly out of the speakers, slowly filling up the room and its four inhabitants- almost like an invitation. Wide eyes stare at each other, silently asking- shall we? Shall we try to make our feet match the beat of the music, shall we try to move our arms as smooth as water, shall we try to replicate what we've seen on the screen and in movies for years til now? Shall we try to dance? A silent nod seems to pass through the room, and within moments, tiny hands clasp each other as they begin to spin and twirl. It's awkward, at first- all lanky limbs and stumbling footwork. Socks slip on the floor and foreheads knock into each other, but the music is getting louder and the day is getting later- and she’s getting more comfortable. New steps are invented and a breathless laughter begins to escape from her mouth as she slowly realizes what all the fuss was about. It was fun. ii) It gets easier, after. This time it's a dance birthday party, and though she's apprehensive, she feels herself vibrate a bit with excitement. The room is spacious, with music pounding out of the speakers adorning the walls. The ground vibrates under her feet, and this time, like a match to a fire, they roar to life, moving on their own accord. Every body part feels in sync- whether they are or not, she doesn't know- but what she does know is the laughter bubbling in her stomach. The way everyone screams the chorus of the song, the way the lights flicker when the beat drops, and the way there's a sense of unity amongst all of her friends. The way she knows that these are the moments she lives for, that these are the moments that fill up her hollowed bones and eat away at the inhibitions festering inside of her. The frenzy of shoes squeaking on the floor and wide grins the size of half-moons finally recedes hours later, with everyone panting but alive on the ground. An unspoken agreement carries throughout the room. Let's do this again. iii) And then, it becomes harder. She doesn't understand why her body doesn't move the same way it did a mere few years ago, she doesn't understand why the hubbub of a dance floor no longer swarms her with energy. The resounding beats feel like they're suffocating rather than rejuvinating, the room feels stuffy rather than exuberant- but why? Maybe it's because of the way her eyes keep flitting to others, making mental images of their moves next to hers. Maybe it's because of the way her new (but false) reputation as a good dancer seems to follow her around everywhere, like one’s shadow under sunlight. Maybe it's because of the way she feels the press of eyes on her, the way she swears her friends’ mouths’ tilted up when she finally found the courage to let loose and ignore the inhibitions that had taken over in recent years. Maybe it's because of the way there's always a voice burning in her brain telling her to be good, to be outstanding, or that there’s no point at all. And then, it’s not freeing. It’s all too much. Without another word, she lets her feet carry her away.

#venting #not sure if this makes much sense to others #but just got back from a school dance party #and this pretty much sums up all of my feelings #writing #prose #original prose #writers on tumblr #spilled thoughts #spilled feelings #spilled ink #dancing #dance parties #social gatherings #insecurities #self esteem #dance #my writing #short prose

“...am I the only one that thinks these dance parties with Taylor as the DJ are so awkward and lame?”

#Taylor Hanson #awkward #dj #dance parties #lame #confession

Realising your manuscript needs work!

I’ve just edited the initial draft of my novel set in the 1990s. Like any novel at this early stage, some scenes work, some need work. But for the first time I sense this manuscript needs more work than my recent novels did at this early stage. It’s not because it’s bad. It’s because I don’t think it’s capturing the ‘feel’ I want. I have fond memories of that period. Me and my now husband…