Feb 3, 2022
Viola: Asani isn’t answering their phone
Millie: I’ll call
Viola: Darius and I have both tried six times each, what makes you thi-
Asani: Hello?
seen from China
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seen from Kazakhstan
seen from United States
seen from Iraq
seen from Türkiye
seen from Malaysia
seen from China
seen from France
seen from United States
seen from Brazil
seen from Norway
seen from Malaysia
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Australia
seen from China
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seen from Peru
seen from Tajikistan
Viola: Asani isn’t answering their phone
Millie: I’ll call
Viola: Darius and I have both tried six times each, what makes you thi-
Asani: Hello?
Millie: Why isn’t the statue smirking at me?
Asani: It isn’t smirking at anyone, they’re all just imagining it.
Millie: Three of us saw it, Asani. How do you explain that?
Asani: *points at Viola* Sleep deprivation. *points at Darius* Paranoia. *points at Iris* Delusional personality disorder.
Their way of bringing Asani back:
Millie: You kidnapped Asani? That’s illegal!
Viola: But Millie, what’s more illegal? Briefly inconveniencing Asani, or destroying our dreams?
Millie: Kidnapping Asani, Viola!!!
Darius: Millie, listen, whatever I may think of you right now- these guys are counting on you to inspire them!
Millie: What, to kidnap people?!?!
Darius: To work together!
Millie: TO KIDNAP PEOPLE?!?!?!?!
Iris: Millie, we all agreed a sibling is a not a people.
Millie: So uhhh... my question is: my friend keeps on going into the pantry and grabbing handfuls of fettuccine... uncooked...
Darius: I would hope they're not grabbing handfuls of cooked fettuccine!
Iris: In your pantry!
Millie: Yeah... and eating them raw, and they keep calling them 'chips'. ... How do I make them stop?
Darius: Is your friend here?
Millie, motioning to Asani: Yeah.
Darius, to Asani: You're a monster! Words MEAN things! >:(
Viola: Does anybody remember- I haven't been to Olive Garden in many moons- but they DO have a like- fettuccine bottle that you can just- grab em out of and chew-
Viola: HOLD ON. WAS THIS A PRANK YOU GUYS PULLED ON ME WHEN WE WENT TO OLIVE GARDEN AS KIDS?!
Viola: NO, STOP. EVERYBODY SHUT UP. DO THEY GIVE YOU RAW FETTUCCINE TO CHEW ON IN THE LOBBY OF THE OLIVE GARDEN
Everyone else: No.
Viola, to Vladimir and Iris: YOU FUCKIN BASTARDS
Vladimir: YAAAAAAAAY!
Iris: THE PRESTIGE!
Millie: Anyone d-
Asani: Depressed?
Viola: Drained?
Darius: Dumb?
Iris: Disliked?
Millie: -done with their work... what is wrong with you people ...
Oaklen: Would you guys be there for me if I was going through something?
Asani: Nope, absolutely not.
Viola: I hope it sucks, whatever you're going through.
Darius: I hope it emotionally scars you for the rest of your life.
Iris: I hope you reach out to me so I can ignore you.
Vladimir: I can't wait to go to your funeral, knowing I could've changed that outcome.
Millie: *Posts a super low-quality image to the group chat*
Asani: If I had a dollar for every pixel in this image, I’d have 15 cents
Millie: If I had a dollar for every ounce of rage I felt in my body after I read this text, I would have enough money to buy a cannon to fire at you
Viola: Actually I did the math, Asani would have $225, not $0.15.
Asani: Fam I’m right here....
Darius: If I had a dollar I would buy a can of soda :)
Millie: while you’re there could you buy me an apply juice please?
Darius: Sorry I only have a dollar
Millie: :(
Viola: Hey I just realized my friend is right, Asani would have $22,500 because it's a dollar for every pixel, not a cent
Darius: If I had $22,500 I would buy a can of soda and an apply juice
Viola: You can buy anything you want with $22,500
Iris: Yeah and they want soda and apply juice
Viola: Apply juice to what
Vladimir: Directly to the forehead
Asani: Great chat everyone
Millie: We need to distract these guys
Asani: Leave it to me
Asani: Centaurs have six limbs and are therefore insects. Discuss.
Viola, Darius, and Iris: *Immediately begin arguing*
Vladimir, watching in horror: Oh this. I don’t like this. I don't like this at all.