#dark insanity

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Arch Enemy — Dark Insanity

[verwelktesgedicht]

In[s]anity

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Arch Enemy ➤ Dark Insanity (VISUALIZER)

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Fraco e doente eu rastejo no pó de enganos passados

Arch Enemy

[writingsmyescapefromreality]

A lot of people have asked me what's my novel about and what's it's based around. Of course there's a saying that goes around for writers, 'write what you know and come out your comfort zone in order to experience new things so that whatever you put on paper is unique, original - something not out there in the market already.' I always wanted to be a writer and nearly 3 years ago I started writing for once. I was so used to writing book ideas down, never patient with finishing the book so missing out detail and even starting chapter 1s but only ever to rip them up and chuck them away. I always read them back thinking is this something I could see being read by someone of my age - that the novel keeps their interest.  However I did start writing. I wrote whenever I could, whenever I needed to escape from the life I was living due to the circumstances of everything going on. It was a help through my problems you could say. Though when people read it they will question it. The traumatic thoughts and words, I mean who wouldn't? But I was in this bubble so tightly closed, trapping myself - unable to breath. It's a journey of my secondary life. From year 7 to year 11. That is the basic outline of it.

Some bits are totally made up and some areas are linked or completely is the situation. People who don't know me will always be left guessing and questioning. People who did know me and people who know me will know some things and unsure about others. In the end people will always be left guessing which is the fun part of it. 

Writing is an important subject for me, always has been and always will be. Especially since I write from the heart and soul to capture every emotion in depth. And this book is a some sort of lesson to me of my mistakes I have made. Of my misunderstandings. Of wanting to grow up to quickly when really all I want to be honest is be free but in the view of seeing a child so free when they run around at the park or make you go totally happy over how hyper and full of energy they really are.

I escaped what I was going through for a long time, not fully but I did. I got saved you could even call it that - like in those fairytales when the princess is hopelessly scared though gets saved - happily ever after. I'm not proud of the things I've done but I can say with confidence that I've never made them again. My past for a long time, for as long as I can remember ate me up, And for a long time I hated myself for it. Even the ones that weren't my fault. And that happened until I finally got accepted as myself, me as my past, my present and my future entwined together. And a billion thank you's aren't even enough to show my appreciation as that's all I've ever wanted.